


Family Ties

by Tobiiiaaas



Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-11
Updated: 2014-02-18
Packaged: 2017-12-23 03:33:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 30
Words: 96,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/921505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tobiiiaaas/pseuds/Tobiiiaaas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Family Ties bind us all: Jac and Jonny must face the world as new parents whilst a figure from Jac's past threatens to unravel everything. As events spiral out of control, and families and friends face challenges from all sides, life in Holby will never be the same again. Amidst it all, a life is lost in a desperate struggle for survival...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

PART ONE

Jac Naylor opened her eyes, blearily blinking in the dark. She turned her head to the right and stared at the alarm clock sitting on her bedside table. 2:30am. Jac groaned and clambered gracelessly out of the bed. For a few moments everything was quiet again and then she heard it. The soft pitiless wail of a distressed child coming from the room next door. She looked back at the bed, watching as Jonny shifted suddenly and immediately fell back to sleep. Jac felt the muscles in her face twinge as she smiled.   
The wailing continued as Jac opened the door and stepped out on to the landing. She fumbled in the dark for the light switch and upon finding it, Jac flicked the switch and bathed the hall in bright white light. She yawned and swayed unsteadily on the spot before closing her hand around the nursery door handle. As the door swung open, Jac felt a sudden blast of wailing ringing in her ears. She strode over to the cot and picked up the sobbing baby, cradling the newborn in her arms.   
Jac rocked her child gently from side to side, whispering a lullaby to try to soothe her. The baby continued to cry. She brushed the faint ginger hair out of her eyes.   
“It’s all right, it’s all right,” Jac whispered staring into the baby’s big green eyes. The baby made a small sniffling sound and looked up at her mother. In an instant, Jac could feel her heart melting. “Are you hungry?” Jac asked softly. “Is that what you want darling?” The baby raised a chubby little finger and pointed at Jac. 

The next morning dawned bright and early. Jonny was already at the breakfast table, munching his way through a bowl of cornflakes with a mug of steaming coffee sat beside it. He glanced up from his bowl as the kitchen door opened and Jac walked inside, her mouth open as she yawned loudly.   
“Our little terror keep you up all night then?” Jonny asked with a wink at Jac. Jac scowled.  
“I don’t know why you’re so cocky Maconie, it’s your turn tonight.”   
“Touché.” Jac pulled up a chair and sat opposite Jonny. Jonny swallowed another mouthful of cornflakes before continuing. “How is she anyway?”   
“Sleeping. For once.”   
“She’s probably worn herself out,” Jonny said.   
“She’s worn me out,” Jac muttered. “Five hours I’ve been awake already this morning. Five, long hours.” She reached over and picked up Jonny’s coffee mug.  
“Hey that’s-” Jonny began but his voice trailed away as Jac took an enormous gulp of hot coffee. “No, it’s okay, you have it.”   
“I wasn’t asking,” Jac said and took another gulp. She yawned again. “There really isn’t enough caffeine in this.” Jonny raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you on shift today?” Momentarily distracted, Jonny didn’t reply so Jac reached over, picked up a cornflake and threw it at him. It bounced off his nose and fell to the floor.   
“What? Oh. Yeah, yeah I am.” Jonny finished off the last of the cornflakes and jumped to his feet. “And actually, I’m running late.”   
“Better get going then or Mo will have your testicles so tightly squeezed in that vice you’ll be singing in falsetto.”   
“Mo’s just a big kitten,” Jonny countered. Jac snorted derisively as Jonny walked over to her and kissed her cheek. “Bye, I’ll see you later?” Jac nodded. “Love you Naylor.”   
“I love you too,” Jac replied in a soft understated voice.   
Jac blinked suddenly, staring out the kitchen window in surprise. She thought she saw...but no, she couldn’t have done. She hadn’t seen that girl in years. But then why? Jac shook her head sharply. No. It was impossible. Just a strange hallucination. You’re dreaming Jac. That’s all. 

Sacha clapped his hand on Jonny’s back in his usual friendly manner.   
“So, how is she?”  
“How’s who?”   
“Your daughter of course!” Sacha exclaimed.   
“Just kidding, I knew who you meant,” Jonny joked. He bit his lip, trying desperately not to laugh.   
“Oh you-” And Sacha laughed, his face broadening into a wide smile.   
“Since you asked so nicely,” Jonny began but he dissolved quickly into a snort of laughter. He cleared his throat. “I mean err, she’s great. Really great!”   
“Keeping you up all night I expect?”   
“We take it in turns. I’m on duty tonight.”   
“Better stock up on caffeine then my friend,” Sacha told him. “It’s gonna be a long night for you.”  
“I would, but Jac keeps drinking all of it.” The expression Jonny made was so comical that Sacha couldn’t help but laugh again.   
“Well that’s Jac for you,” he said with a grin. “Listen, I’ll let you get on. Lots to do today!”   
“Tell me about it,” Jonny replied. “All right, have a good one mate.”  
“You too,” Sacha said as he headed off in the direction of AAU. 

Jonny stood outside the lift, waiting patiently for the doors to slide open with the familiar and comforting: Doors opening airing from them. The hairs on the back his neck prickled suddenly and he looked behind, his left eyebrow arched. There was nothing out of the ordinary there, just people going about their lives. As normal. Yet Jonny could sense that something wasn’t right. He felt like there was someone watching him from afar; not close enough to see but close enough that it made him feel unnerved. You’re being stupid Maconie. No one is watching you. Even so, Jonny couldn’t help but be worried. His instincts didn’t often let him down.   
Doors opening. The sound brought Jonny crashing back down to earth and he turned to face the now open lift. Jonny stepped inside and pressed the button for Darwin, shooting a last look out across the entrance room as the lift whirred into life. Doors closing. For a moment Jonny thought...He shook his head. He sighed in relief as the lift began to glide gently upwards. 

“It’s just you and me again today,” Jac said as she sat in an armchair cradling her baby in her arms. “Daddy’s working.” The baby made a snuffling sound as she opened her eyes and gazed into Jac’s. There was something about her that just managed to dissolve all of Jac’s worries and fears with a single innocent look. She took hold of her tiny hand and her eyes lit up as the baby squeezed it gently. She gurgled and began to dribble out of the corner of her mouth. Jac giggled. She never used to be so easily won over by babies before. They were noisy, ugly, untrained creatures that denied you any form of social life. But as Jac stared into the eyes of her child, her own baby, she knew that no, that wasn’t true. Not in the slightest. In reality they were beautiful, sweet, adorable. They relied on you completely, utterly for their lives. Jac was responsible for another life and it honestly felt good. She was ready for the challenge. 

She stumbled through the hustle and bustle of the entrance, her eyes wide, searching desperately. It had been a mistake to go there this morning, she knew that now, but she had to see. She had to check. She took hold of her arm and found that she was trembling. It had been so close. She had nearly been seen. It wasn’t time. She wasn’t ready. Not yet.   
She lost her balance, crashing to the floor as someone pushed past her at a fast paced sprint. Someone else grabbed her hand and helped her up; the world was spinning in her eyes, she couldn’t focus. 

Jonny’s phone vibrated loudly in his top pocket. He picked it up and stared at the screen as it flashed 1 new message Jac Naylor at him. His lips curled into a cheeky smile.   
“Patient, Maconie!” Mo called loudly, pulling him out of his happy trance.   
“Just a minute!” Jonny opened the message and began to read.  
“Surely your sex life can wait?” Mo shouted deliberately as several patients’ heads turned to look at Jonny quizzically. Jonny sighed.   
“It might be important, please Mo.” The look on Jonny’s face was so pitiful and pleading that Mo had to give in.   
“Okay, you can have five minutes, no more!” Jonny kissed her forehead.  
“You’re an angel Mo!” Mo snorted.  
“Just get on with it!”   
“I’m going, I’m going!” Jonny walked away, holding his phone in his outstretched hand and reading the message carefully.   
Get some nappies after your shift. We’re running low already. Jac xxx. Jonny made an expression that was halfway between a smile and joking exasperation as he made to reply.   
Gotcha. Jonny xxx. He locked his phone and placed it back in his top pocket. 

“Are you okay?” She heard the voice speak but she couldn’t fathom the words, it all seemed so alien. “Do you want me to get someone for you?”   
She opened her mouth and spoke with a quiet, feeble whisper. “I’m fine, I’ll be fine.” She let go of the strangers hand, staggering as she made a valiant attempt to regain her balance.   
“Where are you headed?”   
“Darwin, I need to get Darwin,” she said, her expression determined.  
“Take the lift over there-” The stranger pointed over his shoulder. “And choose the sixth floor.” The girl nodded, thanking the stranger. She turned to leave. “Hey,” the stranger began. She looked back at him, her eyes wide in surprise. “I’m Nick. I was wondering if...perhaps I could have your number?” She thought about this and nodded with a smile. No one had ever asked for her number before. She took a pen out of her handbag and scribbled the number on the open palm of his right hand. Nick sighed with relief. The girl turned to leave again but Nick’s voice broke through the air once more. “You didn’t tell me your name?”  
“Oh it’s Jasmine, Jasmine Burrows.” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. Part Two

PART TWO

Jonny woke up with a start. He was covered in a cold sweat and his heart was racing. He blinked, rubbing his eyes with his hands as he tried to calm himself down. It had all felt so real, he thought. He rolled over onto his side to see Jac sleeping beside him, her mouth slightly agape. Everything was quiet. Jonny rolled back over to check the alarm clock. It was still early. As he closed his eyes, Jonny felt sleep overtake him again and he drifted back into his dreamworld.   
He was standing in the hallway; looking down as smoke began to billow behind him. He turned as the door to his right suddenly opened and he saw Jac standing there, her face red with panic strewn across. She wasn’t carrying the baby. Jonny’s heart began to thump loudly. He turned back to the nursery but it was too late, flames were licking at the wood and the brass handle glowed white hot. If she was still in her cot, there was no hope for her, Jonny thought, running his fingers through his hair with despair. Jac began to walk in a trance towards the nursery. Jonny tried to shout but no words would come out. He watched in horror as Jac placed her bare hand around the doorknob and twisted it; her eyes widened with earsplitting pain pulsating through her. A sudden silence. Jonny watched. He waited. Then in the distance, a faint rumbling noise and as Jonny looked up to its source he saw the ceiling crack. Seconds later the ceiling collapsed in on itself and collided with Jonny, trapping him under a pile of rubble. Jonny’s ears were ringing.   
Jonny found himself being shaken awake by Jac.  
“It’s your turn, come on wake up.” Jac was staring at him, her expression determined. As Jonny slowly returned to the real world he could finally hear then noise that had awoken Jac. Their baby was howling and Jonny laughed. Before Jac could say anything, he grabbed her and hugged her tightly, still laughing. “What’s the matter with you?” Jac asked, incredulously.   
“Nothing!” Jonny said as he leapt out of the bed. He shifted his feet into a pair of slippers and walked towards the door. Jac stared after him. She was half-smiling, half-exasperated. 

Jasmine stifled a yawn with the back of her hand as she peered down the patient notes. It was only her second day here at Holby and as a newly qualified student nurse she was determined to do her best.   
“Late night was it?” Drawled Michael Spence who had appeared behind her out of the shadows of AAU. Jasmine looked flustered.  
“I...I, no, I mean err, I...”  
“It’s okay, you’re new, it takes a little time to settle in,” Michael smiled at her. A thought crossed Jasmine’s mind. He doesn’t remember me. But that was to be expected, they had only met once around four years ago.   
“Professor Hope sent me down here to speak to a patient, but I can’t find him...” Jasmine’s voice trailed off, she looked helpless.   
“Did he tell you the name?”   
“Oh erm, Christophe Schneider.” She pondered this for a second. “That’s a German name isn’t it?” Michael just smiled.  
“He’s over there,” he told her, pointing at the far end of the ward. Jasmine began to walk towards him, but Michael held her back. “Did Professor Hope say why he sent you?” Jasmine shook her head. “He must have said something,” Michael insisted. Again, Jasmine shook her head. “I’m gonna call him.” As Michael raised his hand to pick up the phone, Jasmine flinched as though scared he was going to hit her.   
There was something about her, Michael thought. Something that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. He gazed from the long flowing red hair to the pale scared body that owned it. She reminded him of someone.   
“Have we met before?” He asked. Jasmine’s eyes lit up in surprise. She considered this.   
“No,” she lied.   
“Funny, I coulda sworn I knew you from somewhere.”   
Jasmine didn’t know why she had lied to Michael. What did it matter if they had met before anyway? She rubbed her arm gently, screwing up her eyes as though she had touched a bruise. 

Eyes turned round in surprise as a redhead Consultant stepped out of the lift onto Darwin Ward. There were murmurings of gossip but Jac Naylor walked straight past them, her head held high. She pushed open the door to her shared office.   
“What are you doing here?” Elliot asked, lifting his eyes up from his book. His tone was one of mild surprise.  
“I work here,” Jac said stoically.   
“What about your baby?”  
“Jonny’s looking after her,” Jac replied. Elliot looked at her quizzically.   
“There’s been a couple of changes since you were last here,” he told her and watched as Jac’s expression turned icy.   
“What?”   
“Nothing major, there’s a new student nurse doing a rotation on Darwin and the on-call room is currently closed for refurbishment.” Jac felt a twinge of disappointment at this news.   
“Who’s the nurse?” Elliot frowned. “Don’t tell me, you’ve forgotten their name?” Jac laughed derisively. “I’ll ask them myself then.” Jac swept out of the office leaving Elliot alone with his book. 

“Do you need changing?” Jonny asked as his baby looked up at him with red blotchy eyes. “Yes, I think you do.” He grimaced. “That’s a lot of mess for such a wee thing,” he muttered. The baby made a soft gurgling sound like she was giggling. Jonny’s face beamed. “Just you and me today, mummy’s working.” The baby gurgled again; small drops of saliva formed at the corners of her mouth.   
The arrangement they had come up with was working so far but what would they do when they ended up working the same shift? This had crossed Jonny’s mind numerous times before since the baby’s birth. He knew the obvious solution, a childminder. Yet Jonny wanted to watch his child grow up, he didn’t want those precious experiences to be seen by a childminder who would see it as nothing more than a simple job. Jonny sighed. This was something he and Jac would have to discuss.   
Jac stared at Jasmine from behind, watching her as she got on with her duties. The girl seemed nervous, almost terrified. Ugh. She was probably going to mess up like all the rest, Jac thought distastefully. Then she’ll start crying and she’ll need support and all of that rubbish. Why couldn’t these students have just a little more conviction? The girl turned around.   
Jac didn’t notice the folder slide out of her fingers and crash to the floor with an almighty clatter. Her eyes widened in shock and disbelief. She barely registered as the nurse picked up the folder and handed it back to her.   
“I’m Jasmine,” the nurse said, offering her hand to Jac. Jac ignored it.  
“Jac Naylor,” Jac muttered feebly. She was still numb with shock.   
“I’ve been looking for your for a long time,” Jasmine told her. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	3. PART THREE

PART THREE

Jac’s nostrils were flared and her chest heaved up and down as she marched along the hallway. No one who passed dared to look at her; her eyes flashed pure anger. At last she reached her destination and tapped loudly on the wooden door. Her knock echoed and reverberated through the tense silence. The time had just ticked past 10pm.  
“Enter,” said a sharp voice from within. Jac closed her eyes and pushed open the door. 

SIX HOURS EARLIER

Nick looked up and a broad smile stretched across his face. He beckoned at Jasmine to come and join him. Jasmine held back for a moment, her face pale and anxious. With a deep breath, Jasmine took the plunge and stepped forward.   
Nick was standing by the bar in Albies, a half pint of Guinness sitting partially drunk in front of him.   
“I was beginning to think you weren’t going to show,” he said with a dry laugh as Jasmine stood beside him.   
“Sorry, I got held back,” Jasmine explained with a suppressed yawn. “Busy day, sorry.” Nick made to hold her arm but Jasmine turned the other way.  
“Do you want to talk about it?” Nick offered.  
“Nah it’s all right thanks, can I get a drink?” Nick laughed.  
“Sure thing Jas, what do you want?” Jasmine thought for a moment, considering her options.   
“I’ll have a coke thanks,” She caught Nick’s raised eyebrow. “I’m back on shift at 7.” Nick clicked his finger and a grubby barman turned towards him, scowling.   
“Can I get a glass of coke for the lady here?” Nick asked with a deliberate smile. The barman said nothing and merely went about his business. A few minutes later he returned with a near full glass and slammed it on the table.   
“2 quid,” he said gruffly. Nick flipped a two-pound coin out of his pocket and rolled it at the barman who scooped it up and tossed it into the till with a gentle chime. Jasmine took a sip.   
“That is quite spectacularly...”  
“Awful,” they said together. They laughed.   
“You infuriating man!” An angry voice drifted over to them from the far corner of the bar. Jasmine looked in the direction of the voice with mild surprise on her face.  
“Who’s that?” She asked Nick curiously.   
“By the sound of it, Serena Campbell; she’s the scary boss around here, works on Keller mostly.” Nick paused. “Us guys in Neurology don’t often come across the big bad wolf.” Jasmine took another sip of flat coke.   
“And who’s the ‘infuriating man’?” Nick snorted.   
“That would be Edward Campbell, Serena’s wonderful ex-husband,” Nick explained. “He arrived in the summer, initially on a temporary basis but as you can see, he’s still here. Much to Ms. Campbell’s dismay.”   
“Shush, they’re coming over,” Jasmine whispered. Sure enough, Serena and Edward were approaching the bar, bickering all the way.   
“Why are you even still here Edward?”   
“You know why.”  
“I know the official reason, I just don’t know why you insist on staying.”   
“You can’t dictate where I work Serena, I know it’s not ideal-”  
“We agreed Edward, we agreed to live and work separate lives.” Nick saw his chance and took it.  
“Afternoon Edward,” Nick said. “Ms. Campbell,” he nodded at Serena politely. Serena’s face went from ashen to solemn acknowledgement at the speed of lightning.   
“Oh hi Nick,” Edward replied. “We didn’t see you there.”   
“No matter,” Nick told him. “Oh before I forget, this is Jasmine, she’s a student nurse on Darwin.” Jasmine looked nervously down at her feet.   
“You must be the new nurse then,” Serena said, examining Jasmine up and down with a raised eyebrow. “Hmm, not bad I suppose. You have strength.” Jasmine stared at her. “Two redheads on Darwin Ward, god help us,” she muttered distractedly. “Have you met Ms. Naylor yet?” Serena asked Jasmine suddenly.   
“She’s my sister,” Jasmine said in a low voice under her breath. Edward, Nick and Serena both looked at her with expressions of utter amazement.   
“I beg your pardon?” Serena asked.   
“Jac Naylor, she’s my sister, well half sister really...” Jasmine’s voice trailed away and she turned back to her coke. The hairs on her neck were prickling.   
“Well this is certainly a turn up for the books,” Serena said with a sly smile. “Who’d have thought it...”   
“I’ll catch up with the guys from Neurology on Friday,” Edward told Nick as he and Serena headed for the exit. Nick turned back to Jasmine, but she was gone. 

Jac frowned at the noticeboard in the staffroom. She squinted and then moved closer to it.   
Naylor has a half-sister. Time to panic. Jac’s eyes flashed furiously. She ripped down the notice and scrunched it up in her fist. The door behind her opened.   
“What do you mean by this?!” Jac exploded as Jasmine pushed her way into the staffroom. She froze, taken aback by Jac’s hostility.   
“What?”  
“This!” Jac demanded, thrusting the scrunched up note into Jasmine’s open palm. “This has your number written all over it!” Jasmine was staring at Jac, her eyes wide and fearful. Jac had clearly lost her mind. She slowly unfolded the crumpled paper and gazed at the message written on it.  
“I didn’t write this,” she said meekly.   
“I told you to keep it to yourself but no, you had to make a big announcement,” Jac was raging.   
“I’m telling you, I didn’t write this,” Jasmine pleaded. Jac looked at her in surprise.   
“You didn’t write this note?” Jac queried, an uncertain expression now falling across her face.   
“I did not write that note,” Jasmine said with newfound determination.   
“Then how did they find out?” Jasmine felt the colour drain out of her cheeks. Jac rounded on her. “What have you done? Tell me!”   
“I...told Serena and her husband Edward...” Jasmine fell silent as Jac shot her an icy stare.   
“You did what?”   
“I just let it slip...I’m sorry.”   
“Yeah, well sorry isn’t good enough Princess.” Jac pushed past Jasmine and stormed out of the staffroom, leaving Jasmine alone and defenceless. 

9pm

Jac was having the worst possible shift she had had for a long time. She could sense people gossiping about her connection to the new nurse all around her and feel their gazes upon her as she went about her ward duties. She also felt extremely self conscious about her appearance. Jac peered down at her stomach. It still hadn’t returned to what it had been before the pregnancy. This caused another pang in Jac’s heart. She missed her baby. She missed holding her little Hollie in her arms and cradling her. She missed hearing Jonny sing her a lullaby, badly, to try to get the little monster to fall asleep.   
“Jac...” Jasmine’s voice was barely audible above the sounds of the busy ward. “Ms. Naylor!” Jasmine raised her voice.   
“What do you want?” Jac said exasperated, hardly noticing her.   
“I need you to supervise me...” Jasmine’s voice was barely no louder than a mumble.   
“Just go away Jasmine. I don’t have time for you right now.” Jasmine did not move.   
“I’m not going to let you jeopardise my career because you can’t keep your personal feelings under check.” An awkward silence descended between them. Jasmine couldn’t believe her own daring. Jac was looking at her with indignant rage brewing.   
“I’m sorry, I think I must have misheard you. I’m sure I didn’t hear you speak to a consultant like that, did I?” Jasmine said nothing. “Did I?!” Jac demanded, her hands shaking.   
“You’re pathetic,” Jasmine said, looking straight into Jac’s eyes without flinching. “You stand there barking orders and telling people what to do, acting like you’re better than everybody else. Well, I’ve got news for you Jac, you’re not. You’re just a pathetic young woman who thinks the world owes her a living. It doesn’t.” Jasmine was breathing heavily as she stopped speaking.   
“Have you quite finished,” Jac said quietly and dangerously. Jasmine drew herself up to her full height.   
“No, I haven’t quite finished.” She paused. “I can see why mum left you behind. I wouldn’t have wanted a spoilt brat for a daughter either.” What happened next knocked Jasmine for six. Jac’s right hand whistled through the air and collided with Jasmine’s left cheek so hard she felt herself stagger backwards; there were stars in front of her eyes and her face was burning from where she’d been struck. She felt the injury with her hand; it was wet. As she lowered her hand, Jasmine saw that it was covered in blood. She looked at Jac who was watching her, an expression of fury etched across her face. There was no sign of any remorse.   
“My office Ms. Naylor,” said a calm, yet menacing voice behind her. “10 o’clock.” Hanssen strode away from the commotion and it was only then that Jac realised the whole ward had been watching their altercation.   
“What do you want?” Jac demanded; her eyes were streaming. “Don’t you all have jobs to get back to?” The ward was silent. No one spoke. Jac spotted Elliot staring at her, his face a picture of sadness and disappointment. Jac Naylor had never felt so small in all her life. 

9:58pm

Jasmine dabbed at her bleeding cheek in the bathroom mirror. She was as white as a sheet and her hands were still shaking from the encounter. She grimaced as a sudden sharp pain pulsated through her. She rinsed the cloth under the cold tap and dabbed at her cheek again. Jac’s fingernails had been sharp; Jasmine remembered the pain she had felt as they had torn through her skin. She pulled up her left sleeve and stared at the thick purple bruise that spread from her shoulder to her elbow. She touched it with a pale a finger and winced.   
The door to the bathroom opened and Jasmine quickly pulled down her sleeve, hiding her bruise from the world again. She resumed dabbing at her cheek in silence as the other nurse strode to the sink next to her. Jasmine carefully avoided her gaze.

“Enter,” Hanssen’s voice called out. Jac pushed open the door and stepped into his office. “Sit,” Hanssen barked. Jac pulled up a chair in front of his desk and sat down. She was shaking, her face white with anger and her eyes blotchy from silent tears streaming down her cheeks. “Never in all my time here have I seen such utterly despicable behaviour,” Hanssen was furious. “What do you have to say for yourself?” Jac shrugged and said nothing. She was too angry to speak. “I am absolutely disgusted with you,” Hanssen continued. Jac let out a deep breath.  
“What do you want me to say?” Jac asked, looking at Hanssen with determined eyes. “That I’m sorry?”  
“It would be a start,” Hanssen said icily.   
“I’m sorry I didn’t hit her harder,” Jac replied, using up every last ounce of defiance she had left.   
“You are beyond help Ms. Naylor, this incident cannot be pushed under the carpet with an anger management course, I’m sure you understand?” Jac nodded. Hanssen sighed and for the first time, Jac noticed a pained expression in his eyes. “You’ll have to explain you actions to the board.”  
“I see.”   
“Until then you are suspended from work until further notice without pay. You will hand in your pass to security on your way out. Effective immediately.” Jac was numb. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing, but then, as she reflected on it, she knew that she probably deserved everything she got. She had let her temper get the better of her. Hanssen was peering at her over the top of his glasses. Jac wiped away a fresh tear as she turned away from him. “I’m sorry Jac, you leave me no choice.” Jac was taken aback by Hanssen’s apparent remorse. 

Jac found herself standing in the hospital car park all alone. Tears streamed freely down her cheeks and she had given up trying to brush them away. It was pitch black. There was a sudden scuffling sound behind her. Her phone began to ring; vibrating silently in her pocket. Jac answered it with trembling fingers.  
“Hello” Jonny’s voice greeted her. “Are you all right?”  
“I think I’m in trouble Jonny,” Jac said in a scared voice. Before Jonny could answer her, Jac felt her phone knocked roughly out of her hand. She turned to face her assailant but was met with a shuddering blow to the stomach, winding her. Jac stumbled to her knees as her chest and stomach were pummelled with punches. She made a feeble attempt to defend herself but a sharp shoe struck her in the face, breaking her nose. Jac was coughing blood, spluttering and struggling to breathe. She screwed up her eyes, willing for it all to be over. Jac screamed as she took another kick to her ribs and made a desperate reach for her phone.  
“Jac? Jac can you hear me? What’s going on? Jac?” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	4. PART FOUR

PART FOUR

Jac’s ears were ringing. She spat blood out onto the cold tarmac and her head felt as if it had been slammed into concrete. She tried to move but the effort was too painful. Her legs were numb. She felt a heavy foot pressing down on her back; Jac tried to twist her neck to see. Her heart was pounding. This is it. Jac felt the foot lift up, releasing her. She dared not move. The moment that followed was one of eerie silence, just waiting. Her heart began to beat faster than ever and then it happened. The foot came whistling back down through the hair and collided with her back so hard, her spine buckled. Jac’s face slammed into the tarmac and her cheek scraped along it. Her assailant strode towards to her discarded phone and bent down to pick it up. They stared at the screen; still showing the ongoing conversation with Jonny. Without a word, the attacker took aim and threw the phone on to the ground forcefully where it smashed beyond all recognition. Jac saw the attacker look back at her just for a brief second and then he was gone.   
It started to rain. Jac attempted to move again but her legs stayed stuck fast. Her torso ached so much but she couldn’t feel a thing below her waist. She began to whimper until at last the agony overtook her and she slipped out of all consciousness. The cold wet rainwater splattered against her lifeless body. No one was coming for her. No one knew she was here. Blood trickling from her body mingled with the rain and soaked the tarmac. No one was coming. 

Jonny Maconie stared at his phone. Current call: Jac Naylor. He was breathing heavily. He lifted it to his ear and heard the static again. The line was dead. He moved his fingers to the end call button; they were trembling. Something had happened. Something must have happened. He knew it in his heart. He dialled the only number he could think of for help.   
“Jonny Mac?” Mo’s familiar comforting voice drifted out to him. He tried to speak but no words came out. “Jonny are you there? Is this some kind of game?” Jonny opened his mouth and swallowed. “Jac is that you?”   
“It’s me,” Jonny said at last, his voice hollow and empty.   
“What’s wrong? Come on Jonny you can tell me?” Jonny swallowed dryly again.   
“It’s Jac,” he began but his speech cracked and he found he could not continue.   
“Jonny you’re scaring me mate, what’s going on?” The expression in Mo’s voice was full of concern.   
“She hasn’t come home, Mo, she’s missing.”   
“How do you know she hasn’t just-” Mo began.  
“I was talking to her!” Jonny shouted. “I was talking and then her phone just went dead.”  
“Maybe her battery just died Jonny, it happens,” Mo tried to reason with him calmly.   
“Her battery didn’t die. Someone took it off her!”   
“I’m coming round,” Mo sounded determined. “Don’t do anything stupid.” Jonny hung up without saying goodbye. He began to pace around the kitchen wordlessly. Every now and then he would glance up at the clock but time was moving so slowly.   
“Oi Jonny Mac!” Mo’s loud voice filled the air. “Open this door would you? It’s freezing out here!” Jonny walked up to the kitchen door and pulled the bolt back. Mo pushed the door open. “That is one storm brewing out there,” Mo said, shaking water onto the floor. Jonny stared at her in silence. It took Mo one single look to know that Jonny was a state. There was anxiety and worry stretched all over his face and he clearly hadn’t drunk or ate anything. “Jonny mate, you need to tell me everything.” Jonny closed his eyes and shook.   
“There’s not much to tell.”  
“Just tell that then,” Mo was doing her best to be comforting.   
“I...Jac had finished her shift. Early, but I don’t know why. We were talking and then nothing...”  
“Where’s Hollie?” Mo asked suddenly.  
“She’s upstairs, sleeping. I don’t want to wake her,” Jonny’s voice was beginning to crack more than ever.   
“Where was Jac when you spoke to her?”   
“The car park...I think,” Jonny told her and with a deft hand movement, wiped away a tear that had dripped from his eye.   
“Do you want me to stay with Hollie?” Mo asked. She was worrying for Jonny now, but she knew that if he didn’t do something he would blame himself if anything had happened to her.   
“I need to find her,” Jonny replied. Salty tears were now falling rapidly from both eyes. He stepped into the hall and put on his raincoat. Jonny felt his car keys weighing down in one of the pockets. “I’ll call you,” he told her and opened the front door. Mo took a deep breath, watching him stride out into the cold wet night. 

The windscreen wipers worked furiously as Jonny drove through the downpour. He blinked and another tear dripped onto the floor of the car; he had given up trying to wipe them away now. He just had to keep on driving. He had to find her. The visibility was poor and it was difficult to see where he was going.   
“The turning has to be soon, come on!” Jonny muttered to himself under his breath. He slammed on the brakes and the car came to a shuddering halt. Rain pounded the metal roof, echoing through the car. Jonny wound down the window and looked out behind him. He could feel his heart beating furiously in his chest. Jonny closed the window and started the engine again. The car coughed to life. Putting it into reverse, Jonny drove the car back a few yards and made the turning.   
He could see the familiar lights just ahead and urged the car forward. Everything seemed far too quiet. He turned the key in the ignition and the engine whimpered and died. Jonny’s chest heaved up and down as he opened the car door gingerly. He stepped out into the torrential rain and started to search though the quiet car park.   
“Jac?” He shouted. “Can you hear me?” Jonny’s voice was echoing through the night air but there was no reply. If Jac was here, she either wouldn’t or couldn’t answer. “JAC!” Jonny raised his voice as loud as he could but there was still no response. The rain was pounding him unrelentingly. Jonny turned a corner and yelled again: “JAC!”   
He squinted at the far end of the row of cars. There was something lying on the ground, something limp. A body. Jonny’s mind filled with all his worst fears as he began to run towards it. Please no. Please no, he thought desperately. Jonny broke out into a sprint, ignoring the stitch in his chest. Adrenaline filled his body as he ran. Please not her.   
Jac Naylor was lying spreadeagled in a puddle of dirty rainwater and her own blood. She wasn’t breathing. Her hair was matted with dried blood and there were large lesions all over her legs and arms. Jonny knew better than to move her but his heart sunk at the sight of her bloodied nose and two shining black eyes. She felt freezing. Jonny got up and looked around for the hospital entrance.   
“I NEED SOME HELP HERE!” Jonny screamed. He bent over Jac and tried to help her but his hands froze. He couldn’t do anything. His whole body was locking down. “I NEED HELP! SOMEBODY! ANYBODY!” Jonny’s voice was growing hoarse from all the shouting he’d done. Footsteps. Jonny wheeled around and stared at the distant entrance. He thought he could just make out the silhouette of someone jogging towards them.   
At last the figure came into view; it was Sacha.   
“Jonny?” he said, bewildered. “Jonny, what’s going...” Sacha stopped speaking and he gazed in horror at the sight of Jac lying there. “Jonny?”  
“I just found her like that,” Jonny’s voice broke. His eyes were red and blotchy from his tears. Sacha swallowed uncertainly and then drew himself up to his full height.  
“Jonny, we need to get her inside now. If we don’t she is going to die.” Jonny didn’t move. “Do you understand me?” Jonny nodded. The two men felt numb every time they looked at her. “I’ll get a trolley,” Sacha told him. “Wait here.”   
“I’m not going anywhere,” Jonny said, standing by Jac. “I’m not leaving her.” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	5. Part Five

PART FIVE

The mood on Darwin was sombre. No one looked up as Hanssen delivered the news about Jac. Jasmine nursed the bruise on her cheek and stared into space. Elliot appeared distracted; he kept clutching at his tie and then letting it drop back against his stomach. The rain was still pounding the windows and the distant rumble of thunder was drawing ever closer.   
“As you are no doubt aware, a terrible event has occurred here tonight,” Hanssen announced. There were a few breathless mumbles. “Ms. Naylor has been gravely injured; her attacker is still at large and I beg all of you to be utterly, utterly vigilant at all times.” Elliot nodded. Jasmine stepped forward, her manner uncertain, almost timid.   
“Could she die?” Jasmine asked, her voice cracking. Hanssen turned to look at the skinny, frightened young nurse.   
“It would be remiss of me to lie to you at this difficult time,” Hanssen began. Then he stopped, taking time to choose his words carefully. They were all hanging on to his every movement. “Yes, I’m afraid she could. Her injuries are severe.” There were more fevered whispers at this pronouncement. “Ms. Naylor is currently in theatre and Mr. Spence is taking very good care of her.” Hanssen attempted a soft smile, evidently hoping to reassure them. “I’ll let you all know of any future developments.” They stared at him but it was clear that Hanssen had nothing more to say. He turned and swept away. Elliot shifted his gaze onto Jasmine.  
“If you need to take time off,” Elliot told her, kindly. “I completely understand.” Jasmine shook her head.  
“I’m fine,” she lied. A sudden thought struck Elliot.  
“Should we call Paula?” Jasmine shook her head again. “Is there something you’re not telling us?”   
“No. She wouldn’t come,” Jasmine said.   
“She deserves to know,” Elliot insisted.   
“Mum got what she wanted from Jac. She wants to keep her distance,” Jasmine was looking up at the lights as she said this. Elliot shot her a dubious look. 

Jonny watched from the window of the waiting room as forked lightning flashed across the moonless sky. The rain pattered against the glass, causing it to rattle in the pane. The soft rumble of thunder shook the room followed by another flash of lightning ten seconds later. He didn’t like this interminable waiting. Jac had been in surgery for over three hours now and there was still no word or news about anything. Just...nothing. Another sharp flash of lightning burned in the sky like a bed sheet on fire.   
The door opened suddenly and Jonny wheeled around in a flash. His face fell as he saw it was only Sacha.   
“Any news?” Sacha asked, his mood solemn. Jonny said nothing. “It’s the waiting that really gets you isn’t it?” Jonny could tell that Sacha was trying to comfort him.   
“I just need to be alone,” Jonny said at last. “Please.” Sacha placed his arm around Jonny’s shoulders.   
“I understand,” Sacha said as he released him and turned to leave. Jonny opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. 

Little Hollie was crying loudly as Mo tried to rock her to sleep. She hadn’t stopped for the last hour and it was now getting very late. Mo checked her phone; there were still no new messages since the one Jonny had sent her earlier.   
I’m scared.   
Mo had replied but she had heard nothing more from him, or anyone. She gazed down at Hollie’s small face, perfectly formed with a small baby nose and rosy cheeks.   
“Hush little baby don’t say a word, Mo’s gonna buy you a mockingbird.” Hollie made a gurgling noise as Mo sang softly. “And if that mockingbird don’t sing, Mo’s gonna buy you a diamond ring.” Hollie blinked a silver tear out of her wide eyes. “And if that diamond ring turns brass, Mo’s gonna buy you a looking glass.” She could sense Hollie was already growing sleepy. “And if that looking glass gets broke, Mo’s gonna buy you a billy goat.” She didn’t even notice her own tear falling silently down her cheek. “And if that billy goat don’t pull, Mo’s gonna buy you a cart and bull.” Hollie’s eyes began to droop. “And if that cart and bull turn over, Mo’s gonna buy you a dog named Rover.” Mo continued to rock Hollie in her arms as she sang. “And if that dog named Rover don’t bark, Mo’s gonna buy you a horse and cart.” She made a soft neighing noise after this line; Hollie gurgled laughter. “Shush,” Mo whispered. “And if that horse and cart fall down, you’ll still be the sweetest baby in town.” As she looked down at the baby resting in her arms she saw that at last the child had fallen asleep. Mo laid her sleeping body inside her cot and tucked her under the sheets. “Sleep tight little one,” Mo whispered. “Mummy and daddy will come home soon.” Mo glanced behind her. “I hope,” she murmured. 

Jonny had taken to pacing slowly around the relatives room. There was nothing for him to do. Every few steps he would stop, turn and face the door, willing it to open. But no one had come since Sacha. He was all alone as he waited. Yet the news never came. Jac was still in theatre. He saw his phone flash on the small coffee table but he turned away from it. He didn’t feel up to speaking to anyone right now. 

“I can’t believe anyone would do that to her,” Sacha said in a low whisper to Elliot. The two medics were sipping mugs of coffee in the reception café.   
“Do we know who it was?” Elliot asked quietly. Sacha shook his head.   
“Whoever it was did a runner,” he sighed. “There was no one anywhere near when we found her.”   
“What did they want?” Elliot demanded, he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Both men appeared agitated. “They didn’t take anything? She wasn’t mugged?”   
“There was nothing missing, the police think it was just a random attack,” Sacha’s voice was quiet.   
“It’s cowardice. That’s what it is. Plain and simple cowardice.” Elliot looked defiant.  
“I can’t imagine how Jonny’s holding up,” said Sacha as he took another sip of scalding coffee. Elliot shook his head sadly. 

“We need more security,” Chantelle told a red-faced Serena. “There are too many attacks on staff members and we need to know we’re safe!” Her expression was passionate as she spoke. Serena took a deep intake of breath and smiled.  
“Chantelle, rest assured the safety of my staff is of the utmost concern to me.”   
“That’s the thing, we can’t rest assured. Not after what’s happened to Ms. Naylor and I don’t know about you but I always considered her to be strong and well, you know, able to stand her ground. Now we don’t know whether she’s going to live or die and it’s not good enough Ms. Campbell, it’s just not good enough.” Chantelle breathed out heavily as she finished speaking.   
“I understand what you’re getting at Chantelle, believe me I do.” Serena held up her hand as Chantelle opened her mouth to argue her point further. “But, and this is the big but, we simply do not have enough money to hire additional security. I’m sorry, but it’s out of my hands.” Chantelle looked appalled at this.  
“Safety should not be a matter of money.”   
“I quite agree with you but this is the way the world works.”   
“It’s wrong,” Chantelle cried out, wringing her hands. Serena smiled gently.   
“If I could make it work, I would.” Serena marched away, leaving Chantelle alone with her thoughts. 

Jonny stopped pacing immediately as the door opened, revealing Michael Spence standing in the shadows, still in his surgical scrubs. He could feel a small lump building in his throat as he waited for Michael to deliver the news, good or bad. The lump grew bigger and bigger as Michael drew closer.   
“It’s over is it?” Jonny asked, his voice barely more than a cracked whisper. Michael nodded.   
“There were complications in theatre, she went into septic shock but-”   
“She didn’t make it did she?” Jonny tried to swallow but the lump in his throat prevented it.  
“We managed to get her back and the procedure was a success,” Michael finished determinedly. Jonny’s eyes were glistening in the dark. “She’s not out of the woods yet, but she’s alive.”   
“Can I see her?” Michael paused; he looked unsure of how to proceed.   
“She hasn’t regained consciousness Jonny.” Jonny’s face fell as though his brief moment of relief had been cruelly swept away. “I should warn you. There’s a chance she may never wake up. The injuries to her head were severe.”   
“Michael, I need you to be honest with me. Is there a chance, a wee chance that she will wake up?” A grim silence descended between the pair as Michael considered his options.   
“Yes,” he said at last. “There is a small chance.” He made to leave.   
“Michael?” He turned back to stare at Jonny. “Thank you.”   
“It’s not over yet,” Michael said and left the room. Alone once again, Jonny didn’t know whether the news made it any less unbearable. He still didn’t know whether Jac was going to live or die. In truth, Michael hadn’t really told him anything at all. He let out a deep sigh and picked up his phone. There were six new messages flashing at him. 

Jonny what’s happened?   
Pick up your phone!  
I’m worried about you...  
Jonny Mac please!  
No one’s telling me anything, Jonny?  
Hollie’s asleep. She misses you. She misses you both. 

The last message hit Jonny like a blow to the stomach. In his worry and shock over Jac he had forgotten about their child. How could he forget? I’m a useless father, he thought hollowly. He started to text back but his fingers wouldn’t work. He kept trying to type but none of the words he wanted to say appeared on the screen. Frustrated, Jonny slammed his phone back down on the coffee table and turned away from it. 

Outside in the night the storm had still not relented and the rain still splattered the windows of the hospital. The mood was dark as the staff went about their duties. Jasmine had agreed to do a double night shift, not because she needed the money but because she needed something to take her mind off Jac. The police were asking each of them in turn whether they had seen anything that might have seemed suspicious but no one had seen a thing. One minute Jac had been fine, the next she was being wheeled onto AAU on a trolley...Jasmine could remember the look of utter despair in Jonny’s eyes as he relinquished control of the trolley into Michael’s hands. She had never seen anyone look so completely lost and helpless before; it made her want to say something, any words of comfort but her voice had left her. Instead she had just watched in silence. Moments later her pager had bleeped and Jasmine found herself in the lift back up to Darwin.   
“We understand you and Ms. Naylor had a row prior to the assault,” Jasmine looked round to see a tall policeman with silver hair baring down on her. She nodded. “What was this row about?”  
“Family ties, that’s all,” Jasmine said in a weak voice.  
“Anything specific?”   
“No.”  
“What do you mean by family ties Miss Burrows?”   
“She’s my sister.” The policeman shot her a dubious look. “Well, half-sister.”   
“Did you see where she went after your argument?” Jasmine shook her head. “Very well, do you know anyone who might want to hurt her?” Jasmine shook her head again.  
“I’m sorry, I barely know her.” She looked over her shoulder. “Please, can I get back to work?” The policeman nodded.   
“I’ll come find you if I need a statement,” he said before walking away. Jasmine looked down at her knees. They were shaking. 

Jonny stood by the wall, his mood contemplative. He started to sing quietly under his breath.   
“What becomes of the broken hearted who have love that’s now departed, I know I’ve got to find some kind of peace of mind...maybe...” Jonny’s voice broke. He gazed out at the heavy downpour. Somehow the rain was soothing; it never pretended to be anything more or less than it was. It was just rain. Simple rain.   
“Jonny can I have a word?” Michael had returned and with a simple look Jonny knew that things were not all right. Michael appeared worn out, there was blood on his scrubs and he had dark bags under his eyes.   
“Tell me what’s happened. Please don’t dress it up, I need to know.” Michael took a moment to gather his full strength.   
“Would you like to sit down?” He offered. Jonny shook his head firmly.  
“I’m fine where I am.”   
“Are you-”  
“Just tell me.” Michael paused.   
“Jac went into cardiac arrest just now, we got her back. She’s stable but she’s being transferred up to ITU.” Michael looked at Jonny for any signs of a reaction but the nurse just stared back at him, numb from shock. “Her condition is critical; the next twenty-four hours are crucial.”   
“Hope’s slipping away isn’t it?” Jonny asked in a ragged whisper.   
“There’s always hope,” Michael said but his voice betrayed him. “Come on, you can’t stay here all night.”  
“Why not?”  
“You need to be with your daughter.” The words cut across Jonny’s heart. He nodded.   
“Can I have a moment please?” Jonny said. “I need time to think.”   
“You’re gonna have plenty of that,” Michael told him with a tinge of sadness in his manner. “I’ll order you a taxi, you’re in no fit state to drive.” Without waiting for an answer, Michael left the room leaving Jonny alone with his thoughts.   
Jonny bit his lip hard; he felt the blood trickling down his chin but he didn’t care.   
“This isn’t fair,” he murmured. “This isn’t fair,” his voice grew louder. “THIS ISN’T FAIR!” He screamed the words like a maniac and slammed his fist in to the stone cold wall. Earsplitting pain filled him as he drew his hand away and saw that it was bent out of shape. He cursed under his breath, nursing his hand and wincing as he touched it.   
“What’s going on?” Michael had returned.   
“I had a disagreement. With the wall,” Jonny said and winced again.   
“I’ll check you over, come on.” Jonny didn’t answer.  
“Do you think she’s in pain?” He asked. His demeanour was reflective as he spoke. Michael looked extremely uncomfortable.  
“The kind option is to believe that she’s not suffering but the truth is we simply do not know.” Jonny thought about this.  
“Michael?”  
“I’m here,” Michael’s heart was thumping as he waited for Jonny to speak.  
“I’m not leaving her.” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	6. Part Six

PART SIX

Jac Naylor looked peaceful as she lay with her eyes closed tightly shut amongst the tubes and wires of the respirator. Her chest heaved up and down but Jonny knew it was only because of the machine. He had sat by her side for five days now, only leaving her to take care of their daughter, but there had still been no change in her condition.   
Jonny stared at her, willing her eyes to open, for her to wake up and tell him not to be such an idiot. But she didn’t wake up. She couldn’t wake up. Her chest heaved again and for a moment Jonny’s heart fluttered and then the realisation dawned on him once more.   
“Wake up, please wake up,” Jonny murmured. His voice was soft; it cracked as he spoke and trailed off into an uncomfortable silence. “Please just stop this...I...we need you Jac. I can’t do this alone.” For a moment he thought he saw her eyes flicker, just for a second but when he looked again they remained firmly closed. Jonny had experienced many tricks like that over the past few days. He supposed it was to be expected; he longed for her to recover.   
He heard a noise behind him and turned towards the door, but it was only a trolley being pushed along the corridor outside. He returned his gaze to Jac. 

“Where the hell have you been?” Jasmine flinched as she closed the oak front door and heard the dulcet tones of her father drifting across the hallway.   
“Work,” she said with her eyes fixed upon the tiled floor. She hung up her coat on the rack by the door and began to stride uneasily towards the angry old man in front of her. At first sight her father appeared to be a rather weedy little man with a wispy blond combover and a bulbous red nose; the result of a lifetime abuse of alcohol.   
“I told you to be home for seven,” he said in his gravelly grating voice. Jasmine glared but did not dare let him see. She could smell the alcohol on his breath.   
“I said I might have to work a double,” Jasmine tried to explain but her father was having none of it.   
“You said no such thing, if I tell you to be back at a certain time, I expect you to be back. Don’t you look at me like that!” He said as Jasmine stared at him, her expression blank.   
“I did tell you,” she muttered but even as the words escaped her mouth, she knew it had been a terrible mistake. In a sudden flash, her father grabbed her by the ear and began twisting it in his fingers as he dragged her towards him. “Stop it, stop it, you’re hurting me!” Jasmine yelled but it was to no avail.   
“How many times have I told you not to answer me back?” He was shouting and Jasmine was screaming. It was like this every time. “I asked you a question young lady!” He demanded of her. “How.” He slapped her across the face. “Many.” He slapped her across the other side. “Times.” He dug his fingernails into her scalp and then let go, sending her sprawling onto the floor.   
“I don’t know, I don’t know, please!” She was holding her hands up defensively as he moved towards her again.   
“Get to bed!” Jasmine nodded, her face was strewn with tears and her eyes were wide, fearful. She didn’t say anything. The slightest wrong word would set him off like a firecracker. She picked herself up off the floor and walked past him as calmly as she could muster before climbing the single flight of stairs up to her bedroom. 

Jonny pushed open the door to ITU and walked inside for the sixth day. There was still no change in Jac’s condition but he wasn’t willing to give up on her just yet. He knew she would be all right, he didn’t know how he knew, he just knew. He pulled up the chair beside her bed and sat down with a heavy sigh. He gazed at his bandaged hand; it was hurting him slightly.   
“They keep telling me it’s time to let go,” he said at last. “But, I’m not giving up on you. I can’t.” Jonny held his head in his unbroken hand. “If you can hear me Jac, just give me a sign, just give me a reason to go on.” He looked away; seeing her lying like that was still as painful as it had been the first day. “Hollie misses you like crazy. She keeps looking at me as if to ask me where you are and I don’t know what to tell her. Help me, Jac, please.”   
Jonny bit his lip uncertainly. He leant over and took hold of Jac’s hand and squeezed it gently.   
“Do you remember Christmas?” He asked softly. For a moment he thought he felt Jac’s hand squeeze his. 

Christmas Day 2013

Jonny leaned over and kissed Jac on the forehead.   
“Merry Christmas chunky,” he said, grinning. Jac winced but still managed to smile back at him.  
“Merry Christmas.” She let out a huge groan and tried to shift herself onto her other side in the bed but her heavily pregnant belly was making things increasingly difficult for her. “How much longer of this do I have?” She asked Jonny irritably.   
“You’re not due until January,” Jonny told her. His words were met with an exasperated glare.   
“Can’t you induce it or something?” Jac asked with a sudden hopeful look. “Otherwise, what’s the point of you?” Jonny just laughed. “It’s your fault anyway.”   
“It takes two to make a baby, Jac,” Jonny said, still laughing.   
“It had to be you didn’t it?” Jac sighed.  
“And what do you mean by that missy?” Jonny’s voice was indignant.   
“Never thought I’d end up with a Scottish nurse,” Jac winked at him.   
“Oh you little-” Jonny laughed again but then stopped suddenly as Jac shot him a surprised look. “What’s wrong?” Jac said nothing. “Jac, what’s happened?”   
“I think my waters have broken,” she said finally. Jac threw the sheets off her and sure enough, what she said was true.   
“We’re getting you to the hospital now,” Jonny said with firm insistence.   
“I am not having my baby in that place!” Jac folded her arms defiantly.   
“You’re not having it here,” Jonny countered.  
“Well then, looks like we have a problem.”   
Present Day

Jonny stopped reminiscing and smiled for a brief second. He heard footsteps behind him and turned to see Dr. Gallagher walking towards him, staring through her spectacles.   
“I thought I’d find you in here,” she said with a half-smile.   
“She needs me,” Jonny replied stoically. “Have you run the tests?” Dr. Gallagher drew herself up to her full height and cleared her throat with a dry hacking cough.   
“Yes, I have some good news for you.” Jonny’s whole demeanour changed in an instance at these words.   
“What sort of good news?” He asked, he was hopeful but he knew not to expect too much.   
“She’s beginning to respond to the tests and there are signs of brain activity restoring,” Dr. Gallagher said in her usual matter-of-fact way.   
“So I was right to hold on?” Jonny asked. He felt vindicated.   
“Yes,” she told him.   
“When will she wake up?” Jonny sounded a tiny bit more hopeful. Dr. Gallagher gazed at him with a sad expression.   
“I’m afraid I can’t say. There’s hope but that’s all. If you’ll excuse me,” she turned to leave.   
“Fiona?” Jonny said suddenly. Dr. Gallagher turned back to him. “Thank you,” he told her. She smiled and walked away. Jonny walked back over to Jac and gave her hand another tight squeeze.   
“Did you hear that? Dr. Gallagher says there’s hope,” Jonny sounded tired, worn out and running on empty. “Come on...wake up.” 

Jasmine paced around her room anxiously. She listened out for any signs of her father moving around downstairs but the house was deathly quiet. Good, she thought. She breathed out heavily and closed her eyes. He hadn’t always been like that. Jasmine remembered when she had met him for the first time; he had been warm, kind and loving. Full of the joys of life and eager to get to know his daughter.   
Yet over the months all that had changed. First he had lost his job; after twenty-five years of loyal service the company had turned round and in a single day he found himself suddenly redundant. After that, he turned to drink and initially it had been okay. He would drink himself into a stupor but still tried to be as caring as he could towards his daughter. Jasmine knew now that she should have realised the situation would deteriorate.   
In the last month things had taken a dramatic turn for the worse when her father received yet more bad news. Jasmine still remembered the tirade he had launched that night. 

One month ago

“I was parked there for two flaming seconds!” He had shouted, taking a large swig of vodka from the bottle. “Fixed penalty notice!” He took another swig and swayed unsteadily on his feet. “I’ll show them!” Jasmine groaned as she watched her father take yet another huge gulp. He belched loudly and tossed the now empty bottle to the floor where it smashed helplessly. His eyes were streaming and he could barely stand let alone walk but he struggled his way to the fridge nonetheless and brought out a six pack of lager.   
“Don’t you think you’ve had enough dad?” Jasmine asked tentatively. Her father rounded on her.  
“I’ll know when I’ve had enough young lady!” He closed his eyes and looked for a moment as if he was about to topple over backwards but regained his balance just in time. He cracked open the first can and downed it. He belched again and made to pick up the second can but Jasmine blocked him.   
“You’ve had enough,” she said in a stern voice. “You can’t drink your problems away.” Her father glared at her.   
“Get out of my way Jasmine,” he slurred.   
“No.” For a brief second it appeared as if he was going to give up and go to bed but in a blinding flash Jasmine felt a sudden sharp pain in her stomach and the next second she was falling backwards and knew in a heartbeat that he had hit her. She looked up at him, but he was already chugging back the second and then the third can. She watched helplessly as he worked his way through the entire pack and then with a sickening wretch he vomited all over the kitchen floor and passed out. His body hit the floor with a thump. Jasmine began to cry silently. 

Christmas Day 2013

“You need to push Jac, come on,” the midwife told her as Jac, her teeth clenched and her body shaking tried to push.   
“I am pushing!” She shouted emotionally.   
“I can see the head, come on now!” Jac made a grab for Jonny’s hand began squeezing his fingers so tightly he let out a high-pitched yelp.   
“Do you think you could hold on just a little less tight?” Jonny asked but Jac’s only response was to cry out in agony and crush his fingers further. The midwife was still egging her on.   
“You’re nearly there, come on Jac, keep pushing, come on.”   
“Maconie, if that baby doesn’t come out in the next five minutes I am going to sue you!” Jac screeched.  
“What for?” Jonny said with another yelp.   
“Emotional trauma!” Jac shouted and used all of her remaining energy to push as hard as she could. Silence descended on the room and then the newborn baby began to cry at the top of its lungs. The doctor cut the umbilical cord and handed the child over to the midwife who wrapped it in a blanket and brought it over for Jac and Jonny to see.   
“It’s a girl,” she said, smiling. “You’ve got a beautiful baby girl.” Jac was crying, not tears of sadness but tears of joy. She was absolutely perfect. For the first time in her life, Jac knew she had achieved something truly special.   
“I knew you had it in you,” Jonny murmured. “She’s beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. Look at her wee little hands.” The midwife lifted the baby into Jonny’s outstretched arms. “I’m your daddy,” he told the child. “And see this woman here?” He pointed at Jac. “That’s your mummy.” Jac looked at them both and grinned broadly.   
Present Day

Jonny watched and waited. All he needed was a sign, anything to let him know everything would be all right again. He looked at Jac’s unconscious body, his expression was almost pleading.   
“Please wake up,” he asked again. He asked it every time, hoping beyond hope that one day she would respond. And this time...she did. Jac’s eyes flickered and then opened blearily. She stared straight into Jonny’s eyes and then blinked again. Jonny couldn’t believe it. He looked up to the ceiling and murmured: “Thank you.” His heart was pounding. Jac was awake at last. 

TO BE CONTINUED...


	7. Part Seven

PART SEVEN

“She’s responding well to treatment,” Dr. Gallagher told Jonny as she took quick look at Jac’s pupils; they contracted at the light. Jonny yawned and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “You should get some rest.” Jonny shook his head firmly.   
“I can’t,” he said after a short pause. “Not until I know she’s going to be all right.” Dr. Gallagher sighed deeply and attempted to give him a sympathetic smile.  
“You know I can’t promise that.” Jonny turned away from her. “I wish I could, but you and I both know, there are no guarantees.” Jonny did not answer her. “I’ll leave you two alone.” Dr. Gallagher nodded curtly and swept away, her black dress flowing behind her. For a moment Jonny was left in a dimly lit silence as he sat fidgeting with his hands. He didn’t know what to say or do. Jonny felt utterly helpless. A soft spluttering noise filled his ears as though someone was clearing a long dry throat.   
“Where am I?” Jac asked wheezily. Jonny turned his head immediately. She sounded very weak.  
“The same place you were last time,” Jonny said, his voice quiet and understated. Jac lifted her head gently and looked around at her surroundings.   
“ITU. Great,” she said. She seemed uneven.   
“I see you’re your usual self,” Jonny said with a slight smile curling on the edge of his lips. Jac scowled and placed her hand on her head, touching the bandage that was wrapped all around.   
“Ugh, how long do I have to wear this for?”   
“Till the Doctor decides to remove it,” Jonny answered. He looked slightly pained which made Jac change tact.   
“Are you okay?”   
“What is this, Jac Naylor showing concern?”   
“Make the most of it,” Jac replied quickly and then coughed. Jonny raised an eyebrow.   
“I’ve been better,” he said at last.   
“I can tell,” Jac said, suppressing another harsh cough. It suddenly struck Jonny how pale she looked. “How long have I been out for?”   
“About ten days.” Jonny saw Jac mouth something out of the corner of his eye which looked suspiciously like a profanity.   
“Hollie,” Jac said suddenly as she made an attempt to sit up in her bed.   
“Woah woah slow down there,” Jonny said indignantly, his Scottish twang becoming even more prominent than usual. “You’re supposed to be taking it easy.” Jonny didn’t seemed to notice that Jac’s legs remained fixed and stiff in the same position they had been when she was lying flat. If Jac noticed, she did not say.   
“Hollie, where’s Hollie?” Jonny could tell by the tone of her voice she wasn’t going to rest until he answered her.   
“She’s fine, she’s with Mo.”   
“You must have a different definition of the word ‘fine’ to me.” She coughed again, her chest heaving painfully.   
“Not even a blow to the head can alter your winning personality,” Jonny told her but she could see he was trying not to laugh.   
“You love me for it,” Jac said and shot Jonny an innocent expression.   
“I can’t think why,” he replied.   
“Funny.”   
“That’s why you love me.”  
“I’ll just let you keep on thinking that.”   
“Touché.”   
“Oh don’t go all French on me, you know I can’t speak it.” They both laughed; Jonny’s full of life but Jac’s was noticeably frail. 

Jasmine stood alone by the side of a small pond. She was scrunching up stale pieces of bread in a bandaged hand and throwing the crumbs into the water for the ducks to fight over. She didn’t see Nick striding up to her from behind and placing his arms around her waist.  
“Guess who,” he said with a slight chuckle. Jasmine jumped and then regained her composure.   
“Nick!”   
“That’s me,” he said, evidently pleased with himself.   
“What are you doing here?”   
“You invited me.” Jasmine turned to face him, pushing his arms off her waist as she did so.   
“I invited you to lunch, you didn’t show.” This wiped the broad smile off Nick’s face instantly.   
“I got held up in theatre,” he tried to explain. “I’m sorry, I messed up.”   
“Why didn’t you just send me a text?” Jasmine asked although she did not sound altogether surprised. Nick cleared his throat in a rather awkward fashion before electing to answer.   
“I may have err broken my phone,” he told her and his eyes shot to the ground. He looked slightly sheepish. “Dropped it in my coffee.” Jasmine gave him a look that plainly said, “Idiot.”   
“Can I take you for afternoon tea?” He suggested as though struck by a sudden brainwave. “To make up for earlier?” Jasmine took his hand and grinned.   
“Call it dinner and I’ll forgive you,” she told him as she stared up into his stubbled face.   
“You drive a hard bargain, you know that?”   
“It’s a good thing I’m worth it.” She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek gently. “Six o’clock, don’t be late.” As she moved away, Nick called out to her.  
“We haven’t said where we’re going yet!” He shouted after her retreating figure. She stopped and took one last look at him.   
“You decide,” she called back. Nick shook his head, laughing silently to himself. 

“Mr. Hanssen we are all very aware of your valued contribution here at Holby but the figures don’t lie. You are way over budget, discharge times are down across the hospital and I’m sure I don’t have to mention the incident with Jac Naylor a couple of weeks ago.” Terence Cunningham looked stern as he spoke directly down the board table. All heads turned to look at Hanssen.   
“The incident with Jac Naylor has already been discussed by this Board,” Hanssen retorted. “I see no reason in dragging it up again now.”   
“But you are aware of the negative publicity it generates for the Trust?” Serena commented.   
“Yes, thank you Ms. Campbell, I am perfectly aware.”   
“Then I’m sure you can appreciate the Board’s position on this.” Hanssen straightened his tie but did not answer her.  
“Look the fact of the matter is, we have reached an impasse,” Cunningham said, seeing his opportunity to take charge of the debate once again. “We need to make significant cuts if we are to stay remotely within budget for the next fiscal year.”   
“I will not support the summary dismissal of valued staff members to solve your budgetary crises,” Hanssen said with his arms tightly folded across his chest. Serena raised her eyebrow quizzically.   
“Three years ago we brought you in here to oversee similar difficult decisions. You had no objections then,” Cunningham shot at him.   
“That was then, this is now,” Hanssen replied matter-of-factly. Cunningham frowned.  
“Look Henrik,” he said after a brief moment to gather his thoughts. “None of us wants to have to do this, but we know where our priorities must be. Where are yours?”   
“My priorities remain, as they always have done, with this hospital and its staff.” He got up to leave. “Thank you for your time. Good day,” Hanssen said with a curt nod at Cunningham. As Hanssen’s fingers closed around the door handle, Cunningham held up a hand for him to stop.  
“Mr. Hanssen,” he began delicately. “You should be aware that your position here is no longer secure.” Hanssen blinked but said nothing. He opened the door and left. 

Mo walked onto ITU, cradling Hollie in her arms. Jonny looked up at her and his eyes lit up immediately.   
“Hey you,” he said taking his daughter from Mo. “Thanks,” he muttered.   
“Any time,” Mo told him but quickly looked away so that he would not see the glistening of water in her eyes. Jonny, however, was already standing over Jac so that she too, could see Hollie.   
“I’ve missed you,” Jac said in a breathless undertone as she watched her baby snuffle. “So much.” Hollie pointed a stubby finger at her which Jac took and squeezed lightly. “I love you. I’m not going anywhere ever again,” Jonny heard Jac telling her. “I promise.” There was a dry cough behind them and Jonny turned to see Dr. Gallagher standing there with a grave expression on her face. 

“This is nice,” Jasmine said as she surveyed her surroundings. The warmly lit pub had low beamed ceilings, pictures of old Prime Ministers strewn across the walls and sign on the bar that read:

Do not attempt to feed the budgie.

Nick laughed and pointed out a table for two in front of them. He pulled Jasmine’s chair out for her, waiting patiently as she sat down.   
“I’m sorry, it was the best I could do on short notice,” he explained.   
“It’s fine, it’s kind of cosy, don’t you think?” Jasmine was smiling warmly and appreciatively.   
“Yeah,” Nick said, relieved. “What do you want to drink?” He asked, pulling out a small card labelled, “Drinks.”   
“Just a coke for me,” Jasmine said immediately.   
“Are you sure? You don’t want anything stronger?” Jasmine shook her head. “Okay, you’re the boss,” Nick said and leaned over to kiss her forehead. “I’ll go an order at the bar.” He walked over to the bar, pausing to take in the ludicrous sign and leaving Jasmine alone with her thoughts.   
She knew that at some point in the future she was going to have to open up a lot more to Nick if their relationship had any chance of surviving. He had quizzed her on her bandaged hand but she had brushed it away with a white lie. He didn’t need to know that it wasn’t coffee that had burnt her hand, it was her father pouring scalding hot water over her hand in a drunken rage as he gripped her wrist and held it firmly on the table. He didn’t need to know, not yet anyhow. She watched Nick as he placed the order and sighed. 

“I’m afraid I have some rather bad news for the pair of you,” Dr. Gallagher told a silent Jac and Jonny as they waited for her to deliver her diagnosis. “Jac, you’ve been unable to move your legs since you woke up, am I correct?” Jonny glanced at her suddenly as Jac nodded, her eyes wide and fearful. “And if I do this,” she stopped speaking and pressed a cold metal ruler to Jac’s thigh. “Can you feel anything?” Jac shook her head. “What if I do...” Dr. Gallagher slapped Jac’s thigh with the ruler. Jac shook her head again. “Just as I thought,” she murmured to herself.   
“What’s going on?” Jonny asked, his voice croaky. He was holding Jac’s hand but he could feel her shaking.   
“This may be a lot to take in,” Dr. Gallagher said; she sounded stern but sympathetic. The atmosphere in the room was tense and foreboding. 

Hanssen sat at his desk and poured himself a small glass of Swedish firewater. He took a swig but did not shudder as the liquid coursed through his body. His eyes fell upon a pile of files that had been dumped on him earlier. He opened the first one and saw Chantelle’s face staring up at him. Staff Nurse, he thought. Well, if savings do have to be made. He scanned over her performance record and his heart sunk. He turned to his computer and threw up a new email which he addressed to Terence Cunningham. 

Mr. Cunningham,

Suggest Chantelle Lane as possible candidate for redundancy. 

Hanssen. 

Hanssen waited for a few seconds before hitting send and watched as the little message came up to tell him it had sent. He took another swig of firewater and tossed Chantelle’s file into the open tray on his desk. 

“Just spit it out,” Jonny told her determinedly. “We need to know all the facts, there’s no point in dressing it up.”   
“Jac?” Dr. Gallagher asked, waiting for Jac’s say in the matter. Jac nodded her head feebly. “Very well.” Jonny squeezed Jac’s hand. The waiting was becoming unbearable; he wished Dr. Gallagher would just tell them what she had discovered so they could figure out a way to try to deal with it, whatever it was.   
“Please,” he muttered as Dr. Gallagher took another moment to quickly glance down her notes.  
“It is highly unlikely that you will ever walk again, Jac, I’m very sorry.” Jac stared up at Jonny and the one thing that struck him was how very frightened she looked. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	8. Part Eight

PART EIGHT

The rain pounded the roof of the car as Jonny drove through the dark country lanes. He could just make out the pale blue glow of the crescent moon shining in the night; it guided his way and shone his path. He drummed his left hand on the steering wheel.   
“Where are we going?” Said a voice from the backseat drowsily. Jonny looked up at his rearview mirror. Jac Naylor was sitting there, strapped into the seat; a blanket was wrapped around her legs.   
“I don’t know,” he answered. He was speaking truthfully; he didn’t know where he was going. He didn’t know what he was doing. The rain grew heavier until it was almost like hail, cascading against the thin metal roof of the car and slamming into the windows.   
“You’re the one driving, you must know,” Jac said.   
“I don’t know,” Jonny said again. Jac blinked, she was suddenly wide awake.   
“Jonny talk to me, what’s wrong?” Jonny didn’t answer, his face was white. He spun the steering wheel around hard and the car skidded into the turn, the tyres sliding on the sodden tarmac. Jac’s mind was racing; she wanted to kick out at his seat but she knew her legs would not move. She paused. It was best not to dwell on that.  
“Nothing, let’s just drive.” He skidded round another sharp corner.  
“Jonny tell me what’s going on right now!” Jac’s voice was shrill, almost fearful.   
“Nothing!” He shouted but Jac knew he was lying.   
“Stop the car.”  
“What?”  
“I said stop the car right now!”   
“What are you talking about?” Jac’s expression was murderous, her eyes narrow and livid.   
“Stop this car or I swear I will rip your flipping bollocks off!” Jonny slammed on the brakes and the car spun to a shuddering a halt. Jonny wheeled around at her, his face as equally furious as hers.   
“I’m doing this for you!”   
“Doing what?” Jac roared!  
“Saving your life!” A silence descended between the pair of them. The rain had turned to a soft pitter patter now; it seemed as if it would soon pass over. It was Jac who broke the silence first.  
“What do you mean?” She asked quietly and carefully. Her face was pale. Jonny took a deep breath.   
“Whoever attacked you,” Jonny paused, gathering his thoughts. “They’ll probably try and get to you again, right?”  
“I don’t know, maybe,” Jac frowned at him.   
“I know it’s a long shot but I didn’t want to take the risk, not when I’ve only just got you back.” Jac put her hand on his shoulder and squeezed it gently.   
“Jonny, it was probably just a drunken idiot, nothing more serious than that.” Jonny looked at her incredulously.   
“They left you in a coma!”   
“I know.”   
“It was not a random attack, Jac. It just doesn’t make sense.”  
Jac said nothing. She could feel herself becoming restless and agitated; it had been like this for days now. Ever since she’d been discharged from the hospital, she had found herself struggling to cope with simple things, such as judging the width of the wheelchair and the doorframe. But it wasn’t just that, it was everything. It was the whole amazing unfairness of it all. What had she done to deserve this? Jac couldn’t fathom it. It was just mad to think that only a few weeks ago she had been at the top of her game and now she had lost everything. Jac stared into Jonny’s eyes. Well, almost everything, she thought. She still had Jonny, and they still had Hollie. It wasn’t all bad. Jac sighed.   
“Jac?” Jonny’s voice cut through her self made silence. “Jac are you all right?” She blinked, feeling a tear drip from between her eyelids. She hadn’t even realised she was crying.   
“I’m fine. Everything’s fine,” Jac’s voice was hollow and she knew Jonny wouldn’t believe her. But that didn’t matter, she didn’t want him to believe her.   
“You’ll tell me when you’re ready,” Jonny muttered quietly. Jac looked away from him.  
“Maybe,” she whispered. “Jonny?”   
“Yeah?” Jonny tapped his fingers against the dashboard.   
“Take me home, please.” Jonny stopped tapping and made a grab for the wheel.   
“You might be in danger.”  
“I don’t care,” Jac’s voice was determined. Her intentions clear and precise. “I need to be where I belong, not skulking in the dark. If he comes back, I want to face him. I want him to see what he did to me, what he did to us.” Jac stared at Jonny fiercely.   
“You won’t be on your own,” Jonny assured her.   
“I know. I want him to see that.” Jonny stared out the window. The skies had cleared and a trillion stars twinkled brightly. A sudden thought struck him.   
“Come outside,” he said slowly. Jac stared at him, her eyebrows arched.  
“Why?”   
“Just come outside.” Jonny was already pushing open his door before Jac could answer. He stepped out on to the wet tarmac and opened Jac’s door.   
“In case you’ve forgotten, I can’t move.” Jonny smirked at her and then turned away. He took hold of her nearest hand and then looked up at the night sky. “Jonny what are-”   
“Shush,” Jonny whispered. “Just look.” Jonny lifted Jac’s hand and pointed it into the sky. Jac looked up and gazed in wonderment at the collection of shining stars.   
“I still don’t see what the point of this is,” she muttered.”   
“Our lives are so busy, we don’t often get the chance to just take a moment and let it all sink in.” Jac’s stare fell back down to Jonny.   
“You idiot,” she told him.   
“What have I done now?” Jonny replied, his voice indignant. Jac laughed. It was the first time she had laughed for a long time. Her face lit up and her eyes twinkled brighter than the brightest star. “You’re smiling,” Jonny whispered.   
“I know,” Jac didn’t know why she was smiling. She just suddenly felt as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. They were both staring at each other. “I love you,” Jac said quietly.   
“I love you too.” He squeezed her hand gently.   
“Now take me home. “ Jonny nodded.   
Jac’s heart was thumping in her chest. She knew Jonny loved her but he hardly ever said it. He wasn’t that type of guy. Jac couldn’t stop smiling, her mind was racing; she could still hear Jonny’s words ringing around inside her head. The engine spluttered to life and as Jonny started to drive, Jac felt her eyelids drooping and within seconds she was drifting off to sleep. The car sped off into the night in the direction of their home. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	9. Part Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jac begins her physiotherapy, whilst Hanssen makes a startling decision about his future

PART NINE

Hanssen stared wistfully out of his office window, watching the hustle and bustle of life below. A tiny sparrow fluttered past the glass carried on its wings by tiny gusts of wind. He sighed as the sparrow faded away into the distance. A first look at Hanssen’s face would show that he was unbelievably stressed; his brow furrowed and bags under his eyes revealed a man who had evidently not slept in days. He removed his spectacles and rubbed his eyes gingerly. It took him a few moments to notice his phone flashing at him from where it lay on his desk.   
Hanssen strode over to his phone and picked it up with his right hand. He stared at the screen. 1 new message. With a heavy sigh, Hanssen opened up the message and began to read. His face contorted irritably as he reached the end; before he could think of a reply, however, there was a sharp knock at the door. Hanssen turned to see Terence Cunningham marching towards him, his face a picture of stress.   
“Mr. Hanssen,” Cunningham announced as he pulled up a chair in front of the desk.   
“Mr. Cunningham,” Hanssen replied curtly. “To what do I owe this very early pleasure?” Cunningham cleared his throat before continuing.   
“Chantelle Lane?” Cunningham spoke delicately, gazing directly at Hanssen for any signs of weakness.   
“Yes?” Hanssen’s expression was stoic and he gave little away in his answer. Cunningham cleared his throat again and spoke hoarsely.  
“Have you informed her of your decision?” Hanssen paused for a moment, watching Cunningham as he took out a lilac coloured handkerchief and coughed splutteringly into it.   
“Not yet,” Hanssen told him. Cunningham frowned, his eyes narrowed.   
“Don’t you think you ought to?” Hanssen stood up from his desk and walked back over to the window. The sparrow had landed on the windowsill and stared up at Hanssen with its tiny bird eyes.   
“I’ve changed my mind,” Hanssen said at last. Cunningham’s ears shone scarlet.   
“I beg your pardon?” Cunningham spoke slowly and carefully, emphasising every syllable. “We...no, you agreed this was the best way to move forward.” Hanssen did not look back at Cunningham as he considered his response, preferring instead to continue his gaze out of the window.   
“I changed my position. No one will be losing their jobs, not this time.”   
“Mr. Hanssen I don’t think you quite realise the situation the trust is in; cuts have to be made and staffing is the best option we have.”   
“I understand the situation perfectly well thank you, and I disagree with the trust on this occasion.” Hanssen spoke in a sharp whisper. Cunningham drew himself up to his full height and glared at him; his face purple.   
“You are blind. Your integrity is compromised and you are jeopardising not only your position but the position of this entire hospital. I’m warning you, the Trust will not stand for this insubordination. You’re treading on very thin ice, Mr. Hanssen. Very thin ice.” Cunningham scowled and then turned to leave.   
“I would ask that the Trust had a little more faith in my ability to handle the situation,” Hanssen spoke quietly but there was the tiniest hint of anger hidden in his undertones. Cunningham stopped, his fingers wrapped around the door handle and turned back to face Hanssen.  
“When you can show yourself to be the leader this hospital so desperately needs, the Trust will have faith. Until then, consider yourself on probation.” Cunningham wrenched open the door and walked through, slamming it behind him. Hanssen stared after him; his face a ghoulish white. 

“Hey look it’s mummy,” Jonny whispered to Hollie gently as Jac wheeled herself out into the back garden. She smiled broadly at them but a sudden pain in her chest made her clutch at her sides. “Are you okay?” Jonny asked, his voice full of concern.   
“I’m fine, don’t fuss!” Jac snapped at him. She exhaled slowly and looked up at him. “I’m sorry,” she said sadly. Jonny took hold of her right hand and squeezed it.  
“It’s okay,” he told her. “But you will tell me if there’s anything wrong?” Jac nodded. Hollie made a sniffing noise from her pram. “She wants you to hold her,” Jonny told Jac. He watched Jac carefully, waiting for her response.   
“Bring her here then,” Jac said at last. Jonny grinned with delight and picked up Hollie, handing her over to Jac slowly. Cradling the baby in her arms, Jac looked up at Jonny, her face beaming brightly. It was the first time she had held her baby in weeks.   
“Did you make the appointment?” Jonny asked her in a low whisper. Jac, who was stroking Hollie’s hair softly, shot Jonny a nonplussed expression. “The physiotherapy?”  
“Oh yes,” Jac replied as realisation dawned. “She’s coming round this afternoon.” Jonny could tell Jac was putting on a brave face for him and he was grateful for it. “Can you take Hollie to the park when she comes?” Jac asked. Jonny nodded. “I don’t want her to see her mum in pain.”   
“Nor do I,” Jonny muttered. “Do you want me to take her in for her check up tomorrow?”   
“What checkup?” Jac asked, her eyes widening in surprise.   
“The one she has every month,” Jonny told her, frowning slightly. “To check everything’s still okay.” Jac rubbed her eyes with her left hand, keeping hold of Hollie in her right.  
“Oh...I forgot,” she bit her lip as it trembled.   
“Hey, it’s okay,” Jonny said soothingly. “We all forget things.” Jac screwed up her eyes as she tried to force herself not to cry.   
“This is important, I shouldn’t forget that,” Jac said in a determined voice. She sighed deeply. “I’m not cut out for this Jonny.”   
“You’re a brilliant mum,” Jonny told her sharply.   
“I don’t know what I’m doing and how can I help her when I’m stuck in this wretched thing?” She indicated the wheelchair with her eyes.   
“You’ve been...no, you are brilliant,” Jonny was looking directly at her as he spoke. “No, don’t argue with me. Our little girl would not be here today if it wasn’t for your tremendous strength and courage.”  
“She needs more than just strength,” Jac protested.   
“She needs you.”   
Jac looked uncertain; her bottom lip was still trembling. Jonny kneeled in front of her.   
“Look at you, you’re both so beautiful,” he murmured. “She’s got your eyes.” Jac looked down at Hollie and her heart melted all over again as Hollie looked up at her through her big green eyes.   
“She’s got your smile,” Jac said quietly.   
“See, she needs both of us,” Jonny told her. Jac nodded.   
“You do realise you look utterly ridiculous kneeling down there?” Jonny laughed. “Unless you’re planning to propose? Oh god you are, aren’t you?” Jonny said nothing as he clambered back up to his feet. “I can read you like a book Maconie.” Jonny remained silent, laughing to himself. Jac couldn’t help herself, she laughed too, rocking Hollie gently. Their daughter closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep in her mother’s arms. Jac felt her little chest rising up and down. Her heart fluttered. 

“Hey where have you been?” Nick said as Jasmine walked onto Darwin, her face partially covered by a bandage under her left eye. Nick stared in a shock. “What happened to you?”   
“It’s nothing,” Jasmine said quickly, but she couldn’t stop herself feeling the bandage with her hand.   
“It doesn’t look like nothing,” Nick said with concern.   
“It is,” Jasmine sounded firm but Nick didn’t believe her.   
“Did someone do this to you?”   
“No!”   
“Are you sure?”   
“Will you just leave me alone?!” Nick looked taken aback but he backed away slowly. Jasmine scowled at him and marched away down the ward. 

“Enter,” Cunningham’s sharp voice issued from inside his office. The door pushed open quietly, revealing Chantelle Lane standing nervously in the frame. “Come in,” Cunningham indicated to his desk with a flick of his wrist. Chantelle stepped inside the office and walked up to the desk. “Sit.” Cunningham pointed at the chair beside her. Chantelle sat down; her heart was pounding in her chest.   
“You wanted to see me?” She said at last. This was most unusual, Chantelle thought. No one she knew had ever been summoned to Mr. Cunningham’s office. Her heart skipped a couple of beats. There was certainly going to be nothing good about this meeting.   
“I did. I’m afraid I have some rather bad news for you,” Cunningham was doing his best to appear vaguely friendly but it was coming off as little more than menacing. Chantelle’s heart pounded even faster.  
“What is it? Is it something I’ve done? I’m sorry, I can work harder, I’ll work double shifts, I’ll do everything you ask of me and more...” Cunningham held up his hand and Chantelle fell silent.   
“It’s nothing you’ve done and believe me, if there was any other way, we wouldn’t be doing this.”  
“Doing what?” Chantelle’s voice cracked as she spoke.   
“We’re letting you go,” Cunningham explained. “I’m sorry,” he told her but he did not seem very sorry.   
“You’re what?” Chantelle’s eyes were glistening. “I have done everything, I’ve worked my socks off for this job and you’re just going to sack me just like that?”   
“There really is no other alternative. We simply cannot afford to keep you on.”   
“But I-”  
“I’m sorry that will be all,” Cunningham cut across her. He pointed to the door. Chantelle looked crestfallen as she walked away from Cunningham. 

“You must be Jac Naylor,” the physiotherapist said, looking down at her phone as Jac pulled open the front door. “Hi, I’m Sue,” Sue extended her hand for Jac to shake. She was a short woman with greying hair that had once been auburn. “May I come in?” Jac nodded and turned her chair around. She led Sue into the living room; the sofas and chairs had been moved to one side so as to allow space for the afternoon’s session.   
“What do you want me to do?” Jac asked as Sue placed her coat and bag over the sofa.   
“I thought we’d start off with some manual therapy,” Sue announced, taking out a selection of massage oils from her bag. Jac took off her shirt carefully and felt a shiver as Sue began to apply the oils to her back. “You may feel a slight tension to begin with,” Sue explained before she started the massage. Jac winced. 

“Did you see that?” Jonny was sitting on a park bench, holding Hollie in his arms. He pointed at the sky where a plane had just soared overhead. “That’s a plane, maybe we’ll take you on one, one day.” Hollie blinked. Jonny cradled her gently, rocking her from side to side.   
“Excuse me, I think you dropped this?” Jonny looked around to see who had spoken. A man with bloodshot eyes was holding a small stuffed giraffe in his left hand. Jonny recognised it as one of Hollie’s and took it from the man. Hollie held out her hands for the giraffe, making tiny squeaking noises. Jonny handed it to Hollie who clasped it tightly in her small hands.   
“Thank you.” He turned away; the stench of alcohol on the man’s breath was apparent and he didn’t want Hollie to be exposed to it.   
“No problem,” the man slurred and walked away, swaying unsteadily on his feet. Jonny caught sight of an opened beer can in his coat pocket. He frowned.   
“Come on you, we best get going otherwise mummy will be wondering where we are. Yes, she will.” He placed Hollie, who was still holding on to her stuffed giraffe, back into her pram and strapped her up. The sun was still shining brightly in the sky as they left the park. 

“How dare you!” Hanssen very rarely raised his voice and on the infrequent occasions he did so, the whole room was known to shake. “You knew perfectly well I had changed my position on the matter.” Terence Cunningham was completely unfazed by Hanssen’s anger.   
“Yes, and I took matters into my own hands,” Cunningham said unapologetically. “Something you weren’t prepared to do.” Hanssen was breathing in and out heavily.   
“Instead you chose to go behind my back and fire one of our best staff nurses.” Cunningham could feel the anger rising in his chest now.   
“Now wait just one moment, you were the one who suggested severing her in the first place!” He squared himself up to Hanssen but the effect was comical as the Swede towered over him.   
“It’s interesting to know that I do not have the Trust’s backing on this,” Hanssen declared in a cold, sharp whisper.   
“The Trust are on my side Mr. Hanssen. There is nothing you can do to sway them and I would suggest that you do not try.” Cunningham’s ears were redder than they had ever been before.   
“Is that a threat, Mr. Cunningham?” Hanssen’s eyes were dangerously narrowed as he glared at Cunningham.  
“Yes, I do believe it is.”   
“I will be offering Nurse Lane her position back, with full compensation of course.” There was a stunned silence between the pair.   
“You will do nothing of the sort.”   
“She was unfairly dismissed, I would like to rectify that unhappy mistake, to the best of my ability.” Cunningham swallowed, clearly determined to get the upper hand in the argument.   
“If you go against the Trust again, your position here will be terminated with immediate effect.” Hanssen did not reply at first, his hands were white and shaking. He glanced out of the window and saw the same sparrow from that morning, fluttering its tiny wings on the windowsill and staring up at him. He closed his eyes, thinking desperately. He had to do the right thing for himself and most of all for the hospital and his colleagues. “Mr. Hanssen?” Cunningham’s voice cut through his prolonged reflection. Hanssen remained silent; he was still considering his position. He watched as the sparrow flapped its wings with a greater strength and then took off from the windowsill, flying in a brand new direction. The solution hit Hanssen at last. It had been staring him in the face for weeks now, even months. This was the only way; the only way he could make a difference. He exhaled deeply.   
“I would like to tender my resignation.” Cunningham’s eyes widened in shock and his face fell.   
“You’re not serious?” He mouthed.   
“I have never been more serious and in any case, the Trust will not be sorry to see me go,” Hanssen told him. Cunningham didn’t answer and he looked thoroughly awkward. “Nurse Lane will be reinstated forthwith and I will serve out my entire notice period. Four weeks, I believe it is?” Cunningham nodded; he was still stunned by Hanssen’s sudden decision.   
“You don’t have to resign,” he said at last. Hanssen stared at him sadly.   
“I’m afraid I do. I need a new direction.” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	10. Part Ten

PART TEN

Jac looked all around for the can of chopped tomatoes she needed. The supermarket aisle was completely deserted save for Jac and her chair. She let out a deep, resigned sigh as she spotted the collection of cans placed on a shelf just out of her reach. Since being in the chair there had been so many things Jac could no longer do for herself and she hated it. She really hated it. She had always been strong and independent, able to rely only on herself and she was determined not to let this change. The chair would not beat her. Jac cracked her knuckles and, placing her basket on the floor, made another reach for the cans. She cursed under her breath as her fingers came nowhere close to the cans once again.   
“This is ridiculous,” Jac muttered. She forced the chair to turn sideways and was shocked to see a pair of polished black loafers looking back at her. The loafers belonged to a pair of suited legs which in turn belonged to a young man, no more than twenty-five years of age, with slick black hair, pale skin and a protrusion of stubble all over his chin which gave him a slightly unkempt look that seemed out of place with his neat appearance.   
“Need a hand?” The stranger asked. His voice had a subtle gravelly nature to it. Jac eyed him suspiciously. She had no reason to trust this man especially since the attack but on the other hand, Jac reasoned, there was really no reason not to either. Her eyes glanced up at the cans that lay just out of reach. The cans looked back. It was as if they were somehow mocking her. Jac’s stomach deflated.  
“Yes,” she nodded. The fire inside Jac gave a little whimper. The stranger smiled, showing no teeth.   
“All right then, what do you need?” Jac pointed up at the cans.   
“One of those,” she murmured. The stranger reached up and grabbed the can, handing it to Jac who placed it in the basket on her knees. “Thank you.” The stranger was silent as he walked away. Jac watched him for a moment. In some ways he reminded her of Jonny but only very little. It was the kindness, Jac thought. Simple human kindness and it still surprised her. 

“Well, what do you think?” Jonny asked as Mo stared open mouthed at the diamond ring sitting in the open box.   
“Are you serious Maconie?”   
“Yes, Mo, I’m completely serious!” Jonny laughed as Mo picked up the ring and twirled it between her thumb and forefinger.   
“This must have cost a fortune!” Mo exclaimed as she examined the diamond. Jonny bit his lip uncomfortably; even though it was Mo, he didn’t feel it was right to divulge the ring’s price. Mo noticed the look on his face and changed tact immediately. “This is...this is beautiful.”   
“Do you reckon she’ll like it?”   
“Why wouldn’t she?” They both caught the look in each other’s eye and burst out laughing.   
“She’s not very good on the whole marriage thing,” said Jonny. The laughter gone from his face, he appeared apprehensive. Mo held his arm firmly and stared straight into his eyes.  
“Listen to me Maconie, Jac will love it. It’s perfect.”   
“You really think so?” Jonny gazed at the ring. “You don’t think it’s too...I don’t know, clichéd?” Mo snorted.   
“Trust me, this is one time where Jac will love clichéd.” Jonny bit his lip again. He had never ever been in this position before. Sure, he’d had girlfriends before Jac, lots of girlfriends, but they had never lasted. Not like this. Before he’d met Jac, all his previous relationships had ended on the rocks with clouds hovering over his honesty.   
There had been one time, Jonny reflected, just one time he had come close to proposing to another girl. Her name was Emily and she had been the first girl Jonny had ever told he loved. It had all been a lot of fun and happiness for a while; they had even lived together for a time. But like so many things in his life, it had all turned sour. His lying caught up with him and he remembered standing teary eyed in the rain as Emily launched a cascade of expletives at him. This was promptly followed by a box of his stuff tossed unceremoniously at his feet.   
“You’re sorry?” Emily yelled. “I’ll give you sorry,” she picked up a mug from the box and smashed it on the floor. Jonny watched from afar as his younger self bent down to clear up the shards of broken china. Emily swiped her long blonde fringe out of her eyes and took a deep breath.   
“Emily, listen to me. I never meant to hurt you, I never meant for-”  
“For me to find out?” Emily cut across him. “Oh, I’m sure you didn’t.” Jonny gazed at her sadly. There was a lump in his throat.  
“You don’t understand,” Jonny began again but he fell silent at the look of contempt on Emily’s face.   
“I understand plenty more than you think Jonny,” Emily’s cheeks were bright red now as she spoke.   
“It was a stupid mistake, I never meant to place you in any danger!” Emily opened her mouth to retort but stopped suddenly. “It’s just...I...I let you down.” For the first time, Emily noticed the pained expression etched in his eyes and the way his lips quivered as he spoke. Then she spoke again but it was not unkindly.   
“Yes, you did.” Her voice was hollow and yet somehow contemplative. “Goodbye Jonny.” Emily turned away from him; she didn’t want him to see the tears now forming in her eyes. Jonny waited for her to close the door before he walked away.   
“Goodbye,” Jonny whispered as he picked up the box of his belongings and turned away from the apartment for the last time. 

“Maconie?” Mo clicked her fingers at his eyes. “Anyone at home?” Jonny blinked groggily.   
“Yeah, sorry. I was just thinking.”   
“About what?” Jonny opened his mouth to explain and then changed his mind. He smiled at her.  
“Nothing, it’s nothing. Just memories.” He collected the ring box up off the table and dropped it into his jacket pocket. Mo beamed at him.  
“Go get her Maconie,” she said. Jonny didn’t reply, he didn’t need to. He knew exactly what he had to do. 

Jac heaved the heavy shopping bags on to her chair, hanging them off the back handles and wheeled herself out of the supermarket. The first thing she noticed was the stranger from earlier. He looked even paler than he had before as he lent awkwardly against his car, a dark blue Ford Mondeo from 1998. Jac could tell something was off as he smiled faintly at her; his expression was pained and the colour was steadily draining out his cheeks.   
“Are you okay?” Jac asked, wheeling the chair closer to the man. He nodded but he couldn’t hide the grimace he made.   
“I’m fine, thank you. Just a little bit of chest pain.” He winced again and clutched at his heart.   
“You know you should really get that checked out,” Jac told him.   
“I’ve got an appointment with my GP tomorrow,” he explained.   
“GP? What do they?” Jac began but caught herself. “That’s good,” she finished.   
“You have a nice day, won’t you?” The stranger wished her. He reached into his pocket and began to fumble with his keys. Jac had a nagging worry at the pit of her stomach as she started to manoeuvre the chair away from him. He’ll be fine, she told herself. People get chest pain all the time, it’s not always a sign of-There was a sudden loud thud behind her. Jac desperately turned her chair back around in a blind panic.   
The stranger was lying spreadeagled on the ground, his eyes wide and staring. He wasn’t breathing.   
“I need some help over here!” Jac shouted but no one was coming. They were all alone. “I can’t do this,” Jac muttered as she bent down over his body. She gazed at her legs, willing the feeling to return to them. “Come on please!” They remained motionless while all the time the man lay on the ground, his life seeping away from him. Jac looked urgently all around for someone, anyone to help. “Christ,” she muttered. She concentrated all her efforts on getting her legs to move. All that physiotherapy, there had to be a point to it! “Come on!” Jac shouted. “Just give me this one thing, please!” And then a miracle happened. Her toes twitched. She could feel the blood rushing through her legs; it was like an intense moment of pins and needles but Jac didn’t care. She used all of her strength to heave herself out of the chair and get into a position where she could help the man who had helped her before.   
Jac listened for any signs of breathing and began chest compressions. It took three courses before he returned to them. He breathed deeply, looking up at Jac.   
“What happened?” He asked, sounding scared.  
“You collapsed,” Jac told him as she lifted herself back into her chair. It was difficult; her legs had suddenly given way under her weight and the feeling was gone again. Right now, however, that didn’t matter. “I’ll call you an ambulance,” she said. The stranger nodded. Jac pulled out her phone and dialled the number. “It’s on its way,” she said.   
“Thank you,” the stranger wheezed.   
“Do you want me to stay with you?” Jac asked. He shook his head as he spotted the baby food sticking out of one of Jac’s shopping bags.   
“You get back to your family, I’m sure they need you more than I do,” he said weakly. Jac smiled and as she pushed the chair away from him, a sudden realisation struck her. She didn’t even know his name. 

It was late evening when Jac finally made it home via two bus routes and a long chair-walk up the hill to the cottage. The smell of home-cooking filled her nostrils as she turned the key in the lock and pushed the door open. Jonny’s low pitched singing drifted down the hallway from the direction of the kitchen and it was this voice that Jac now followed.   
“When did you get back?” Jonny asked mid-song as he saw Jac enter the kitchen. He gathered up the onion he had just sliced and poured the pieces into the frying pan which sizzled appreciatively on the hob.   
“Just now,” Jac told him.   
“I didn’t hear you,” Jonny replied.   
“Must have been the singing. You could kill with that, you know?” Jonny laughed.   
“Hollie’s asleep, I gave her dinner earlier.” Jac nodded. “Ours is nearly ready,” Jonny indicated the pot of beef stew in the oven.   
“I love you,” Jac said softly.   
“I love you too,” Jonny said, taking the frying pan off the hob and placing it to one side as he bent down to open the oven. With bright blue oven gloves on either hand, he picked up the stew placed it across the cold hobs. Jac watched as he took the lid off the stew and poured the onions from the frying pan into it, using a wooden spoon to stir the contents accordingly. “Shall we eat?” Jonny said, tasting his stew. Jac grinned. 

“Well, at least one of us can cook decent meals,” Jac said as she swallowed the last mouthful on her plate.   
“Hey, yours aren’t bad,” Jonny sniggered.   
“I was talking about mine,” Jac retorted sarcastically. They both laughed. It felt good to laugh, especially after all that had happened. Jonny slipped his hand into his pocket and twiddled his fingers around the box. When was the right time to do this? Was there ever a right time? “What are you doing?” Jac’s voice cut through his thoughts and brought him crashing back down to Earth.   
“I really do love you, you do know that right?” Jonny said suddenly. Jac looked at him quizzically.  
“Yes, what’s this about?” Jonny took a deep breath.   
“Having you and our little Hollie...it’s, it’s the best thing that has ever happened to me and I...” He paused, finding the words difficult to say. “What I’m trying to say is, I finally feel like I’ve made something of my life and I don’t want to lose you.” Jac watched him curiously as she took a sip of white wine. Jonny got to his feet, his hand still in his pocket.   
“What are you doing?” Jac asked, her right eyebrow raised as she watched him walk towards her. “Tell me you’re not doing what I think you’re about t-”  
“Shut up,” Jonny told her in a soft murmur under his breath. “You don’t have to say anything, yet.” Jac eyed him suspiciously. Well here goes, Jonny thought. The moment of truth. He got down on one knee and took out the box from his pocket. “Jac Naylor, would you do me the honour of marrying me?” He opened the box and the diamond ring sparkled from within. Jac stared in amazement, first at the ring and then at Jonny. Her heart was pounding so fast in her chest, she thought it might literally explode out at any moment. Jonny was still on his knee, waiting for her answer. Jac swallowed.   
The word was so simple, just the one syllable. It never usually required this much thought, after all it was just one single word. It was like telling someone you loved them, it was just an answer. An answer to a simple question. Yet this was the hardest question to answer of them all but Jac knew there was only one answer she could give. Only one answer she could ever give. She looked deep into Jonny’s wide, fearful eyes and squeezed his free hand.   
“Yes.” 

END OF ACT ONE  
TO BE CONTINUED


	11. Part Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jasmine's life spirals out of control

Scenes of a violent nature that some readers may find disturbing...

ACT TWO

PART ELEVEN

Hanssen stared at the picture of Fredrik on his desk. His expression was one of deep forlorn and regret. Yet there was no time for that right now as Hanssen’s eyes fell upon his watch. It was getting very late. He yawned; it wasn’t a heavy exaggerated yawn, just a yawn big enough to convey how tired he was. He’d been tired for over three years now, ever since he’d taken on the job at Holby City. If he had known then, what he knew now, he would never have accepted it; yet at the same time he didn’t regret taking it. The three years had managed to be both the best and worst times of his life and he knew beyond all doubt that when the time came for him to take his leave; he would be leaving with memories he would treasure to his grave.   
He cleared his throat and waited. There was no sound, no rasping knock. Just silence punctured only by Hanssen’s melancholic breathing. His phone began to chirp and as he stared at the name flashing up on the screen, he placed it back down on his desk and turned away. The chirping died away surrounding Hanssen once more in eerie silence. His eyes fell on Fredrik’s photo and for the tiniest of instances they flashed with an unkempt rage. He reached down and picked up the pristine picture holding it tightly in his hand until his fingers began to crumple. He stopped suddenly, letting go of the photo and watching as it fell in a crumpled heap on his desk.   
“Maja,” he murmured. “Maja, Maja, Maja.” With a deft flick of his wrist Hanssen knocked the crumpled photo off his desk and into the wastepaper basket by his feet. For a second it looked as if he about to retrieve it; he turned away and ignored it. The noise his phone made at that precise moment came so suddenly that even the usually prepared Hanssen was taken aback. It chirped with such vigorous determination that Hanssen felt he could not safely ignore it.   
“Hanssen,” he answered with a brisk command to his voice. There was a pause whilst the man on the other end took a moment to blow his nose. Hanssen frowned, his eyebrows arching comically as he waited for the caller to regain his composure.   
“Cunningham,” Cunningham announced once he had finished sniffing unpleasantly. “Sorry about that, I seem to be coming down with something. Must be a bug going round.” Hanssen made a noise that sounded like a cross between a tut and a hmm. His tongue curled around his teeth absentmindedly. “Anyway you’re probably wondering why I’m calling you,” Cunningham paused, deliberately leaving a gap in his speech for Hanssen to fill.   
“The thought hadn’t occurred to me,” Hanssen retorted. Whilst in the past he would have made room for Cunningham’s idiocy; he had no time for the odious little man now. He could tell Cunningham was pulling a disparaging expression on the other end by the way in which he coughed very succinctly.   
“Anyway,” Cunningham emphasised the third syllable; “I’m aware that your time here comes to an end tomorrow and I-”  
“Yes?” Hanssen interjected.   
“I just wanted to say how very sorry we all are to see you leave and we wish you every bit of luck in your next venture,” Cunningham finished spouting the party line and fell silent.   
“Thank you,” Hanssen replied curtly. “Will that be all?”  
“I have nothing further to add.” There was a sharp click and Cunningham hung up. Hanssen’s eyes flashed furiously again and he slammed the phone down on the desk so hard that a hairline crack appeared in the otherwise unblemished screen. He glanced down at the photo, its curled edges sticking out of the wastepaper basket. He blinked, clearing his eyes of water. 

Jasmine lay face down on her bed; the light was off and she scrolled silently through the contacts on her phone. She stopped on M and stared at “Mum.” Her fingers edged slowly towards the call button but at the last second they fell away. She looked at the time; it was getting late. There was no guarantee that she would answer anyway, thought Jasmine with a heavy sigh. She sat up, wincing, and cocked her head, listening out for any indication of her father’s imminent return from the pub. Jasmine closed her eyes and pressed call. She listened as the phone rang but there was no answer. Jasmine didn’t hang up, however. A sudden beep.  
“You’ve reached Paula Burrows, if you would like to leave your name and phone number, I will get back to you as soon as I can...” Jasmine froze. What could she say? She hadn’t spoken to her mother in over a year.   
“Hi,” Jasmine began weakly. “Hi, sorry, I mean um...it’s Jasmine. Your daughter,” she added as though it needed clarifying. “I need your help. Please mum.” She hung up just as the front door below her opened with a terrifying bang.   
“Jasmine!” Her father’s dulcet tones drifted up to her room; his speech was slurred worse than ever. Jasmine listened carefully; there was more than one voice carrying from the hallway. “Jasmine answer me when I’m talking to yer!”   
“Yes?” Jasmine called down uncertainly. She heard the sound of smashing china followed by a high pitched cackling laugh that Jasmine did not recognise.   
“Oh yer are in then! I’ve got a couple o’ me mates round.” Jasmine groaned. This was the last thing she needed. “Yer can come down and join us.” The colour in Jasmine’s cheeks drained. “I said yer can come down!” Her father yelled and she knew there was no way out of it. She would have to endure his pleasant company. 

“What did she say?” Mo nudged Jonny eagerly as they both sat in the staffroom, savouring the hard-earned mugs of coffee in front of them. The nightshift was a killer, especially for Jonny who longed to be with his family. He smiled up at Mo, watching the look of anticipation building in her eyes.   
“I’ll tell you later,” he said tantalisingly. He wanted desperately to tell Mo the big news but it was just as much fun to tease her.   
“Don’t you do that to me Maconie!”   
“Do what?” Jonny grinned and took a sip of coffee.   
“Tease me! I know what you’re up to!” Jonny bit his lip; he was trying not to laugh.   
“I don’t know what you’re talking about Mo. I would never dream of teasing you.”   
“Oh come on Maconie, you’ve gotta tell me!” Jonny thought about this for a moment. It was fun to see the look of monumental desperation in Mo’s eyes but at the same time he was desperate to spread the news. He took another sip of coffee and made his decision.   
“Very well, I suppose you’ve waited long enough...” Mo was hanging on to his every word.   
“Come on Maconie, don’t drag this out, my break’s almost over!” Jonny took a deep breath.  
“She said yes.” There was a moment of silence between the pair of them and then without warning, Mo grabbed Jonny and pulled him into a bear hug.  
“Congratulations! I’m really pleased for both of you!” Jonny was laughing so hard he could feel the build up of tears in his eyes. 

Jasmine flinched as a beer can went soaring past her head and landed unceremoniously beside the overflowing bin. Her ears were pounding from the unrelenting sound of club tunes that played at full volume throughout the house mingled with the drunken cries of her father and his friends.   
“Si! Si!” Jasmine heard the woman with the high-pitched laugh calling for her father. There was no reply. “Si! Where are you man?” The woman staggered into the kitchen and went over to Jasmine. “You seen Si anywhere?”   
“No,” Jasmine said, flinching away from her.   
“Why you scared? I ain’t gonna hurt you.” Jasmine didn’t know what to say. This woman was a friend of her father’s and as far as she was concerned that meant she was hardly someone she could trust. She certainly wasn’t going to either.   
“I’m just jumpy. It’s nothing.”   
“Oh right, well if you see Si, tell him Ellen’s looking for him?” Jasmine nodded. “Ta!” Ellen wandered away leaving Jasmine alone with her thoughts. She couldn’t stay here much longer. She had to get out. Jasmine began to walk slowly towards the front door; her heart was thumping so hard in her chest. If her father caught her trying to leave she would be for it. Her pocket vibrated suddenly causing Jasmine to jump almost a foot up in the air. She took out her phone and with shaking hands, she answered it.   
“Jasmine? It’s mum.” Jasmine breathed again.   
“Hi,” she whispered audibly.   
“What’s happened? You sounded scared,” Paula seemed concerned but there was never any guarantee of it being genuine.   
“I can’t talk here, he might hear me,” Jasmine said, looking over her shoulder to make sure her dad was nowhere within earshot.   
“Jas what’s going on? Is it your dad?” Jasmine clammed up. How much did she know? “Jas listen, I haven’t got long. Has something happened with your dad?”   
“Yes,” Jasmine said, her heart sinking like a stone. She didn’t hear the sound of footsteps marching unevenly towards her. She couldn’t smell the stench of stale alcohol on his breath. Not until it was too late.  
“What’s he done-” Paula began but a slurred voice suddenly interrupted.   
“Who yer talking to Jasmine?” Before Jasmine could answer, her father grabbed the phone out of her hands and stared at the caller. “What yer been telling her eh Paula?” His ears were glowing scarlet; Jasmine didn’t think she had ever seen him look this angry.   
“It’s a private conversation Simon,” Paula’s voice sounded determined but she was no match for him.   
“It don’t look very private Paula,” Simon slurred.   
“You’re drunk,” Paula said disgustedly. “What sort of example is that to set your daughter?” Simon laughed heartily and Jasmine caught a whiff of his breath. She backed away quietly.   
“You’re in flaming India darling. Yer ain’t even here or looking after her. So don’t yer dare tell me what example I am or aren’t setting. Okay?” His fists were clenched as he spoke; Jasmine viewed them with a wary look.   
“You’re a mess Simon. Sort yourself out.”   
“How about yer stay the hell out of my life? Yer not wanted here so butt out.” His chest was heaving.   
“Simon-” Paula began but Simon hung up. He tossed the phone to the floor and stamped on it until it was destroyed. Jasmine stood in a dejected silence. There was nothing she could do. Her father rounded on her next.  
“Yer little fucking slut!”  
“Dad!” Jasmine spoke out before she could stop herself. The next second he was on top of her, his fists raining down on her stomach.

Jac thumbed through a magazine; a quick look at the cover revealed that it was the latest issue of Holby Weddings Weekly! She gazed at the photos of all the different wedding dresses supposedly in fashion this year. From traditional white to ivory, none of them seemed to make much of an impression on Jac. She sighed as she turned the page and her eyes fell upon a brief paragraph describing the wedding dress hell of Doris from Southwest Holby. As she reached the end of the piece, Jac gave a look that clearly said what she thought of Doris. She turned the page but was greeted by an A4 picture of Doris squeezing herself into a dress that was five times too small.   
“No wonder you couldn’t find the right one. Look at the size of you,” Jac muttered unkindly. Her lips curled into a sly smile; she knew Jonny would have ticked her off if he’d heard her. She had to admit her figure wasn’t quite the same as it had been before she’d had Hollie; being stuck in this infernal chair wasn’t helping either. Jac glanced down at her slightly chubby stomach and frowned. She would have to do something about this but Jonny did insist on cooking pasta all the time. At least she could be certain she would never reach the size of a bus or...well, Doris. She turned over to the next page and smiled. There was certainly a lot to prepare she thought as she tossed the magazine aside and reached down for the next one. 

Every inch of Jasmine’s body ached. She was trembling and her teeth chattered loudly. On the plus side, Jasmine thought, her father had at least left her alone for now. She hoped this would be the only beating tonight but she dared not risk it once his friends were gone. The front door opened. Jasmine forced herself to stop trembling so she could hear what was going on. It sounded like the exchange of goodbyes and her heart dropped like a stone through a wet paper bag. All she could do was wait. The tension was becoming unbearable.   
The living room door opened. Simon leered at her, his eyes were bloodshot and he had to lean against the frame to keep himself steady.   
“Fuck yer,” he snarled. “I ain’t doing anything yer say anymore.” Jasmine stared at him. He was looking directly at her but it seemed as if he was talking to someone else.   
“Dad?” She asked uncertainly, her voice faint. Simon staggered towards her.   
“Yer a filthy whore!” Jasmine was shaking; she had never been so frightened before but there was no escape from it.   
“Dad it’s me, it’s Jasmine.” She knew she wasn’t getting through to him as he lurched ever closer.   
“Yer think I wouldn’t find about him?” He was almost upon her. Jasmine could smell his putrid breath. “Yer slag!” 

Hanssen answered the door and stared at the caller blearily. As he gradually regained focus, his mouth fell open in surprise.   
“Maja?” He said. Maja smiled slightly.   
“Aren’t you going to invite me in Henrik?” She asked him determinedly. Hanssen blinked and stepped back, allowing Maja to come inside.   
“What are you doing here?” Hanssen enquired with an arched eyebrow. Maja looked at him incredulously.   
“Didn’t you get my email?” Hanssen shook his head whilst Maja tutted under her breath. “Never mind, I’ll explain it to you now.”   
“I don’t mean to be-” Hanssen began but Maja cut across him.  
“I’m sorry Henrik, I honestly don’t mean to intrude but it’s about our son.” Hanssen’s eyes flashed. 

Jasmine backed up into the corner as far as she could but Simon kept coming at her. She could feel his sweaty hand under her shirt as his fingers twisted with her bra strap.   
“Dad it’s me, it’s Jasmine. Please stop!” But he either wouldn’t listen or couldn’t. He seemed convinced that she was someone else. Jasmine shuddered as she felt her bra come loose.   
“Yer mine Paula, mine!” At last Jasmine knew; he thought she was her mum. That made everything so much worse. Simon grabbed at her breasts, digging his fingernails into her skin. Pain seared through her but she was pinned to the wall.   
“Dad please,” her pleas fell flat as Simon continued his attack. Tears began to roll down her swollen cheeks. “Please...”

“Hello beautiful,” Jonny said with a broad grin as he came into the bedroom. Jac looked up at him and smiled.   
“Finally home then,” she said, feigning annoyance. She watched as Jonny began to change into his pyjamas. “You need to start working out,” Jac said as Jonny pulled the shirt over his shoulders. Jonny looked comically affronted for a second and then he just laughed.   
“I’ll have you know, my body is amazing.”   
“Yeah? Who told you that?” Jac was trying not to laugh.   
“You actually,” Jonny shot back at her.   
“I was probably trying not to hurt your feelings,” Jac’s response was as quick as lightning.   
“That’s not what you said last night,” Jonny said knowingly.   
“Just get into bed.”   
“Well I’m not one to refuse a direct order,” Jonny winked at her. Jac groaned.  
“It’s a good thing I love you,” she began. “Because your flirting is the worst I’ve ever seen.”   
“It works though,” Jonny said with a cheeky smile as he climbed under the duvet. “I love you too,” he added.   
“I’ve seen mice flirt better.”   
“Oh yeah?” Jonny asked. “I bet they can’t do this though.” He leant over and kissed her on her lips. They lingered for a while before turning it into something a little more passionate. 

Jasmine was on the floor now; lying on her back and watching fearfully as her father lowered himself onto her. There was a cut above her eyebrow and blood dripped down into her eye as Simon undid his zip.   
“Filthy whore. Disgusting little slut. I own yer!” She was so scared now as she tried to back away from him across the floor. “Stay where yer are!” Simon screeched and his arm pinned her where she lay.   
“Stop it! Get away from me! Dad!” Jasmine tried to beat him off with her hands but he grabbed them and twisted her wrists until they almost snapped. She cried out but her mouth was suddenly covered.   
“This is what happens to filthy fucking whores!” Simon smacked her head against the floor so hard that Jasmine could see stars in front of her eyes and she knew that it was all too late. There was nothing she could do; no escape from any of it. She closed her eyes as he kept her pinned to the ground. His alcohol stained breath was all over her and he no longer seem to care how much he hurt her. Jasmine could feel the tears rolling steadily down her cheeks; she couldn’t stop them. Whoever this man was; he was no longer her father. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	12. Part Twelve

PART TWELVE

The clock on the mantelpiece ticked ever on, its minute hand effortlessly completing rotation after rotation of the face. Everything was bathed in an impenetrable darkness and the silence, so total, it enhanced the echoing tick tock. Below, on the beige carpeted floor, Jasmine lay in a huddled heap of blood and tears. There were scratches and cuts all over her face as though she had been attacked by some kind of wild, ferocious animal. Jasmine feebly tried to cover her face with her bloodstained top but found that she did not have the strength to hold it there. She whimpered quietly to herself as her arm flopped back on to the floor and silent silver tears mingled with the blood on her cheeks. She didn’t understand; how could this have happened to her? Jasmine winced as a spasm of pain passed through her muscles. This wasn’t supposed to have happened. It wasn’t right. Every way she thought, she tried to rationalise the events in her mind but the truth was; there was no rationalisation to be found. What had happened, had happened, and she would have to live with it for the rest of her life. There would be no going back now; Jasmine knew this.   
She yawned. It hadn’t struck her until now but she was incredibly tired; but then, she reflected, she had been awake for almost twenty-four hours now. Jasmine turned her head on to one side as she listened out for any sign of Simon moving about upstairs. The house was silent as the night. She glanced down at her legs; they were shaking and she could feel trickles of blood seeping down to her ankles. Her head was groggy; she couldn’t focus. The ticking of the clock went on and on until it became emblazoned in her mind. Through the darkness she could just about make out the time; it was 3 o’clock in the morning. Jasmine grimaced. Her eyelids began to droop; sleep overtook her and she fell headfirst into nightmares. 

Jac woke with a start; she was sweating all over and her chest heaved heavily up and down. She turned to stare at Jonny but he was sound asleep, his face contorting with each breath. Jac yawned, screwing up her eyes and rubbing them gently with her hands. She looked over to the baby monitor on her bedside table but no sound emitted from it; Hollie must be asleep as well, Jac thought. She gazed down at her motionless legs and willed them to move as hard as she could. She was making progress, Jac considered. After all, that physiotherapy woman had said so. It wasn’t enough however, she was still trapped and Jac found it unbearably stifling. She yearned to practice again; to save a life through her hard-earned medical knowledge and skill. It felt like a lifetime since her last shift and although Jonny had kept her up to date with all the comings and goings, it really wasn’t the same.   
A toe twitched. Jac was sure of it, a definite twitch. Her heart raced faster and faster; would the toe twitch again? She waited in the gloom of the early morning and as time passed, nothing further significant happened. She sighed, dejected but not defeated. Perhaps it had just been a muscle spasm. Jac shook her head. No, she thought, it was a twitch. Jonny groaned and rolled over onto his front. Jac took a deep breath and then concentrated all of her energy into moving her legs. Her heart leapt; had that been? No, Jac told herself, don’t get excited, not yet. Her legs shook all of a sudden and then just as out of the blue as it had begun, they stopped and did not move again. Jac fell back on her pillow and lay awake, pondering what had just happened. All attempts of trying to sleep had fallen away but right at this moment, Jac Naylor did not care. She had more important things on her mind. 

Jasmine shivered and then convulsed violently until she retched and vomited all over the floor around her. Even though the stench of the vomit was intolerable, Jasmine found herself glued to the spot by some kind of invisible force. It held her there and its grip tightened the more she tried to resist. She looked up at the ceiling with a slight jump; there had been a sound but as quickly as it had started, it was all over. Jasmine was unnerved, if Simon saw her in this state...There was no telling what he might do, not any more. In just one evening, her whole idea of her father had been wiped away. This was a new world and not one that Jasmine felt any desire to be part of. She felt her forehead; it was wet with blood. She couldn’t remember hitting head; Jasmine shook herself. Many things were becoming fuzzy. She remembered parts in vivid detail but her mind had shielded itself from others.   
One thing that Jasmine did realise, however, was the growing intensity of pain she felt all over her body. There was nothing for it, she would have to do something about it. A hospital perhaps? Not Holby, she couldn’t let anyone from Holby see her. Jasmine shivered again when she thought of the shame it would cause her. If any of her friends and colleagues found out; they would never be able to look at her the same way again. She would forever be the unclean girl. Jasmine was so certain of this, so utterly convinced that for a moment she thought of one other way out of her plight. Jasmine shook her head fiercely as she tried to rid herself of such thoughts.   
Maybe she could phone for help? Jasmine reached into her pocket for her phone but with a sudden pang, she remembered what her father had done. Her arm fell loosely to her side. The smell of sick had risen so much by now that Jasmine was sure she had inhaled some of it up her nose. She ran a hand through her knotted hair and a realisation suddenly hit her like a fresh bolt of lightning. If not to get help, she had to get away from this house. She stood up and swayed unsteadily on her feet. Jasmine flung her arms out to balance herself and with careful precision she stepped over the pool of vomit and out into the hallway. Standing in the hallway, Jasmine listened out for any signs of Simon but he was thankfully still asleep. She paused with her hand on the door handle and looked cautiously over her shoulder. She trembled with every movement and the shock was beginning to wear off. 

Jac picked up one of her magazines from the bedside table and began to sift through it, using the light of her phone. After about five minutes Jac closed the magazine shut with a sharp snap and placed it back on the table. Not even looking at weddings was able to distract her tonight. Jac sighed. She cast her mind back over to what her physiotherapist had instructed and began to empty her mind of all superfluous thoughts and feelings. There was only one state of mind she needed to be in. Unsurprisingly, Jac found it almost impossible to rid herself of all this; memories from the past flooded her as well as all her current feelings. She forced herself to concentrate as hard as she could, remembering the exercises she had been taught but to no avail. She screwed up her face in disgust. This was hopeless, Jac thought in desperation.   
“I can’t do this,” she muttered under her breath, taking care not to disturb Jonny. She didn’t want him to hear her. “It’s too difficult, too much.”   
“You are amazing,” It seemed strange that this particular memory would enter her head at this precise point. Jac could see the words escaping Jonny’s lips in her mind and felt the strength welling up within her. Maybe this was all she needed? 

“Talk to me,” Maja murmured. “Henrik please.” Hanssen sat in a grim silence; he barely even registered the words she spoke to him. They were in the living room of Hanssen’s house; one of the windows was slightly ajar. Maja’s face was pale and she shivered as the cold night air poured into the room. Hanssen either did not feel the cold or just did not care. “Henrik?” Hanssen looked over at her, his expression one of utter distaste but not for her, it was as if he were looking straight through her. “Henrik, what’s the matter?” Hanssen blinked slowly and cleared his throat. For a brief moment, Maja looked relieved but then Hanssen merely swallowed and closed his mouth again. Maja turned away from him; she felt beaten. There was no more energy left within her.   
“Maja,” Hanssen said; it was so sudden, so without thought as to almost have come from out of the blue. Maja did not face him but she acknowledged him with a simple nod of her head. “What do you want me to do?” He sounded helpless and indeed it was a little pathetic. Maja took hold of his pro-offered hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.   
“Just be there,” she whispered. “That’s all anyone wants you to do.” Hanssen let go.   
“Is that enough?” He asked wistfully. Maja turned back to him at last and looked deep into his eyes.  
“Yes, Henrik, it is more than enough.” Hanssen still appeared doubtful but the warmth of Maja’s smile began to take hold.   
“Leave me,” Hanssen announced. Maja’s smile faded; she looked taken aback by this sudden declaration. “Please,” he continued. “I need to be myself for a little while.” Maja accepted this but there was no way she could disguise the hurt behind her eyes. “Santorini,” Hanssen muttered to the floor.   
“I’m sorry?” Maja asked as she started to move away from him. Hanssen looked up at her.   
“Nothing, just recalling a holiday I once had. A long time ago now.” He paused. “It hardly matters now in the grand scheme of things.”   
“I suppose not,” Maja said. “I’ll leave you be.” As she walked away, she looked back to see Hanssen staring after her; his expression was hard to read but Maja liked to think it was good. 

Jac was still awake. She didn’t feel as tired as she had an hour previous but she supposed that was due to her passing the point of no return. The point at which you give up on sleep completely because you know there is no way you can possibly drift off now. So it was for Jac who quietly entertained herself by practising some of the exercises she had been taught. She took care not to wake Jonny; he had shifted in his sleep again and was now lying with his head facing her. Jac felt comforted; it was good to have him close by. She carefully flipped the bedclothes off her so that she was bathed in cool air and, remembering what the physiotherapist had said, began some light exercises.   
Jac screwed up her eyes and told herself to concentrate as hard as she possibly could on moving her legs. She willed them to respond. There was nothing; her legs lay as motionlessly as they had done for weeks. Irritated, Jac slapped her thigh. She froze. Jac looked all around and then with a quiet hand movement she hit the side of her right thigh. It was definite; she had felt an actual tinge of pain. Her spirits soared. If she could feel pain, then that meant...Elated, Jac scrunched up her eyes again and use every last ounce of her energy to move her legs. This time, she knew she could do it. She had to do it.   
Her legs shifted. It was only slight, but they definitely shifted. This was a start. Jac felt the feeling rush back into them and it made her giddy with anticipation and excitement. Perhaps her life could soon return to normal; Jac stopped herself in her tracks. There was no point getting overexcited, not yet. She stretched her toes, bending them back and forward. She couldn’t help herself, the enormity of this was too much to handle alone. She bent over Jonny and gently shook him awake.  
“What is it? What are you doing?” Jonny murmured, his throat gargling. He blinked through bleary eyes until the image of Jac’s excited face swam into view. “Why are you looking at me like that?” Jonny asked, his voice suspicious. “Don’t tell me, has someone died?”   
“Ha. Ha,” Jac said with a faint scowl. “I wanted to tell you something,” Jac began.  
“What?” Jonny looked nonplussed. “It’s not even light outside yet.”   
“Well, show you,” Jac continued, ignoring Jonny’s protestations. Jac looked down and began to concentrate deeply. As Jonny watched, Jac’s legs started to rise up, until she was holding her knees in her arms. He gasped in amazement and then a broad grin etched itself across his face.   
“I can’t believe it!” He grabbed Jac and pulled her into an embrace. “I cannot believe it! This is incredible.” Jac didn’t say a word, she just enjoyed his reaction with the tiniest of smiles. It was enough to convey exactly how she felt. 

Jasmine staggered through the cold night. Barefoot and cold, she could hear owls hooting in the trees; she was beyond terrified. The shock had all but completely worn off now and the memories of her ordeal kept flooding back to her. Every time she closed her eyes she could see Simon’s red face in front of her; she could even smell the alcohol on his breath. It made her sick to the stomach but there was no escaping it. She had no idea where she was going, she just knew she had to go somewhere. Jasmine flinched; there was a sound like the snapping of a twig which fell lightly to the ground in front of her feet. It was enough to unnerve her, however, and Jasmine found herself trembling more and more.   
She flicked her dark red hair out of her eyes and stumbled across the field. Her feet were frozen, wet and covered in sludge. She did not care, moreover it was the least of her worries. As she stepped out to the left, Jasmine realised too late that had she had taken a misstep and found herself face down in a ditch running across the middle of the field. Coughing out mud, she shook violently; the pain in her legs was becoming unbearable. Jasmine stared out at the far exit of the field and started to walk towards it, forcing herself to move as fast as she could without running. Her feet grew so numb that she couldn’t even feel them anymore.   
Several thoughts kept running through Jasmine’s mind as she made her way through the sodden long grass. She wondered if she had done something to provoke Simon or if perhaps she had merely been asking for it. She couldn’t shake the feeling of uncleanliness from her. She felt contaminated, dirty, used and above all that, she felt as if she had been summarily dumped like a piece of old rubbish. Hatred for her attacker had mutated into blame for herself. If she hadn’t...These dark thoughts, inaccurate as they were, plagued her every movement. 

Hanssen walked over to where Maja stood; she was watching him with growing fascination in her eyes. He attempted a faint smile but it was difficult to express. It was Maja who bit the first bullet.  
“I’m not asking you to be Mr. Wonderful,” she explained. “That’s not what I want.” Hanssen’s throat made a swallowing noise. Maja laughed with affection. “I just want you to be the Henrik Hanssen I met all those long years ago.”   
“I’m not the same man I was then,” Hanssen tried to explain but Maja held up a hand to silence him. “I’ve changed,” he implored her to listen but she just kept on holding her finger to her lips.   
“You’ll always be the same Henrik to me.” Maja paused and took a deep long breath. “Do you know what I see every time I look at Fredrik?” Hanssen shook his head. “I see you.” Hanssen did not know what to say; he thought it best to smile and nod. It was enough for Maja. “You haven’t changed as much as you like to think.” Maja turned to face the mantelpiece. She took down a small brass ornament and began to twirl it around in her fingers. Deep in thought, she replaced the ornament without a backwards glance. “Come away with us,” she announced. “To Sweden.” Hanssen considered this, mulling it over in his mind.   
“I’ve got quite a few loose ends to tie up here,” he mumbled as though trying to find an excuse not to commit himself.   
“Henrik,” Maja said softly but firmly and as her eyes burrowed into Hanssen, he felt his cold exterior melt away.   
“Okay.”   
“You’ll come?”  
“I’ll come.” They embraced each other. 

“Don’t tell anyone,” Jac told Jonny. He looked at her with an expression of incredulity. Jac grabbed his hand and held it against her chest. He could feel the steady beating of her heart increasing. “I just don’t want anything to spoil this.” Jac was adamant. “Not until we know for sure that everything will be okay.” Jonny nodded.  
“I understand,” he told her. Jac breathed out contentedly and closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep with Jonny’s hand still pressed against her heart. “Goodnight,” Jonny said softly under his breath. He moved his hand and helped Jac lie backwards into a more comfortable position. For a few minutes Jonny lay beside her but he felt wide awake now; he was saved the unedifying task of waiting for the night to die by the sound of muffled cries emerging from the baby monitor.   
Jonny slid out of the bed and put on his dressing gown as he stepped out onto the hall. He pushed open the door to the nursery; Hollie’s cries instantly became louder, the sound reverberating off the walls and bouncing back at Jonny. He walked over to the cot on tiptoes.   
“Come to daddy,” he said as he picked her up and cradled her in his arms. It soon became apparent what was bothering her as the smell from her nappy was almost intolerable. “I think somebody needs changing,” Jonny whispered. He laid her down on the changing table beside the cot and, against her cries and moans, he changed her. It only took a few minutes and once it was done, Jonny placed Hollie with her fresh clean nappy back into the cot and laid her down to sleep. There were two girls in this house he had to look out for, Jonny thought and they were both sleeping. He didn’t think he had ever seen the house look this peaceful before. 

Jasmine broke free of the field and began to wander aimlessly down a deserted road; she knew nothing of where it might lead. Her feet ached enormously and they were sore with red blisters on her soles. She kept on walking, dragging her feet step after step. Her stomach began to churn and grumble. It seemed odd that her body would think of food at a time like this. After everything she had been through, her body still needed its base requirements. Her stomach growled again but she had no food. She had nothing on her at all. Jasmine thought back to the moment she had left the house and she wished she’d had the foresight to grab her purse, but it had all happened so fast. There hadn’t been time to grab anything, she just wanted to get out of there as fast as she could. Another thought crossed her mind. She wondered if Simon had discovered her absence yet and if perhaps, even now, he was scouring the country looking for her. The thought left her cold and she prayed that she would not run into him. She looked down the road and her eyes were suddenly blinded by bright headlamps.   
Her heart filled with fear and dread and began to sink slowly, ever deeper, until a rational thought struck her. Maybe they could help? The car was getting closer, its headlights brighter than ever. It showed no sign of slowing down. Jasmine stepped out on to the road, waving her arms frantically in the air. She was screaming, yelling at the top of her lungs. Could they even hear her? She waved her arms faster, staring down the headlights like the barrel of a gun. The sound of screeching brakes filled the air, high pitched and wailing as the car rocketed towards her. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	13. Part Thirteen

PART THIRTEEN

Jasmine could hardly believe her luck as she looked up to see the car stationary, only inches away from her. The glare of the headlights blinded her but it did not matter. Her head span but she was grateful to be alive.   
“Are you all right?” The driver of the car asked with genuine concern as she clambered out and walked towards Jasmine. Jasmine opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. She gasped for air. In the light given off by the headlamps, Jasmine saw that the driver was a young woman; she had dark brown hair and striking hazelnut eyes. Her fringe curled neatly over the top of her neatly plucked eyebrows and her features were enhanced by her high protruding cheekbones. The first thing Jasmine noticed was a strong smell of strawberries. “I’m sorry, I only just saw you in time,” the driver continued. She seemed shaken up but Jasmine couldn’t blame her for that, she knew how she’d feel if she ever came close to knocking someone down.   
“Where am I?” Jasmine found her voice at last; she sounded scared. The driver gave her a curious look and then wiped away the sweat from her forehead. Her eyebrows arched as she caught sight of Jasmine’s bare feet.   
“You’re just outside of Holby; Lion Crest Road,” the driver told her. “I’m Charlie,” she announced suddenly, offering a pale thin hand to Jasmine.   
“Jasmine,” Jasmine replied, accepting the offered hand. Charlie smiled showing a face full of neat teeth.   
“So what brings you out-” Charlie stopped mid-sentence; she had just noticed the myriad of cuts and bruises all over Jasmine’s face. “What happened to you?” Her manner had changed; she was no longer jovial but serious. Jasmine shook her head fiercely.   
“I can’t say,” she explained but Charlie was not convinced. Jasmine was as pale as the crescent moon that hung loosely overhead.   
“Come on Jas, I know when something ain’t right,” Charlie attempted to get through to Jasmine.   
“Please, it’s nothing. I don’t even know who you are,” Jasmine closed her eyes as she tried to focus herself away from the throbbing pain in her legs. “I just had a nasty fall, that’s all.” She looked up at Charlie, clearly hoping that her lie would satisfy the woman’s curiosity. It did not. Charlie paused for a few seconds. She watched as a bat fluttered from one tree to another. Everything else seemed unnaturally quiet; it gave the surrounding area an eerie feeling.   
“Where are you going anyway?” Charlie asked, changing tact. Jasmine mulled this over in her mind before replying.  
“St. James’,” she murmured but she sounded uncertain. Charlie ran a hand through her hair looking as if she was deep in thought. After a short while she clicked her fingers with excitement.   
“Right!” She exclaimed. “You can’t walk there, not in that state. I’ll give you a lift.”   
“Are you sure? I don’t want to bother you,” Jasmine mumbled. Charlie smiled again.  
“It’s no bother,” she told her. “I was only going home anyway.” She chuckled to herself. “Hop in,” she gestured to the car. Jasmine hung back, she thought she trusted this Charlie, whoever she was, but then again she had also trusted her father. She could feel Charlie’s eyes boring into the back of her head and it was clear that she was trying to figure her out. Jasmine climbed into the car despite every inch of her telling her to run.   
“Thanks,” she couldn’t think of anything else to say. Charlie turned the key in the ignition and the engine roared back into life. She leant across to the stereo.   
“Do you mind if I put on some music?” Jasmine shook her head. “I hate driving without music,” Charlie explained. The cassette tape whirred around in the machine before the sound of KT Tunstall’s voice floated out. “I love her,” Charlie said as the car drifted down the road guided by the headlights.   
“I’ve never really heard much by her,” Jasmine admitted quietly. Charlie’s smile broadened.   
“Let this be an education then!” Jasmine returned the smile but she felt incredibly awkward. The rest of the journey passed in silence. 

The sun was just about rising as Charlie’s rickety old Ford came to a stop outside the entrance to St. James’ Hospital. Jasmine had her hand on the door but Charlie held her back for a brief moment.  
“Listen, you look like you could use a friend so how about I come in with you?”   
“You hardly know me,” Jasmine tried to explain but she was touched by the sincerity in Charlie’s voice. Charlie laughed and her whole face lit up.   
“I’ve just been on a late night car ride with you, I know you more than I know my own family.” The mention of family clearly seemed to bother Jasmine so Charlie stopped herself in her tracks.   
“I suppose it wouldn’t do any harm,” Jasmine conceded. She stared out the window at the hospital looming before her and felt an emptiness in the pit of her stomach. She had never been to St. James’ before and she wondered what any of her Holby colleagues would think of her choosing to come here. It had a good reputation and that was all that mattered, Jasmine reflected. Her mind began to drift back to the night’s events but she shook her head desperate not to let that overshadow her life. This was about her, not her father.   
“Exactly,” Charlie said as she wrenched open the door. “Damn thing gets stuck a lot these days,” she muttered to herself. Jasmine barely heard her, however, as she started to walk unsteadily towards the hospital. 

“I’ll wait here,” Charlie said with a hand on Jasmine’s shoulder. Jasmine attempted to smile but she couldn’t find the energy to. With a heavy heart she walked up to the desk. The nurse on duty greeted her with a gaunt expression; it looked as if she had been up all night as well.   
“Can I help?” said Sandy; Jasmine noticed the name on her badge just above her chest. She could feel the nurse’s eyes giving her the once over and she knew the reaction her injuries would receive. “I’ll get the Consultant for you,” Sandy said immediately. She slid away from the desk and walked up to a middle-aged woman with a clipboard standing outside what was presumably her office. Jasmine stayed by the desk, her hands clutching at the woodwork to stop herself from falling; her legs were like jelly.   
“Hi, I’m Jane Goodman, I’m the Senior Consultant here at St. James’,” Ms. Goodman said in a stern voice. “Would you like to come with me, err?”   
“Jasmine, Jasmine Burrows,” Jasmine told her. Ms. Goodman acknowledged with a simple curt nod. 

Jac rolled over in the bed and woke with a sudden sharp jolt. She opened her eyes; the sun was streaming into their bedroom but there was no sign of Jonny. She wasn’t worried; he probably had an early shift or something today. Jac’s mind began to wonder, but then he normally said if he had. She tried to think back to the previous night but she couldn’t recall Jonny mentioning anything about a shift today. She yawned, covering her mouth with the back of her hand. Her head felt as if she had just done an all-nighter at Albies. She yawned again and swept the duvet off her, hoping that the sudden rush of cold morning air would wake her up.   
It wasn’t until Jac found herself standing in front of the mirror that she remembered what had happened in the night. Out of shock she dropped the hairbrush and watched as it clattered on to the table. Jac blinked and then looked at herself in the mirror again. She wasn’t dreaming; that was the first thing that hit her. Maybe it was a hallucination? No, she was definitely standing there. It seemed to her as if, at long last, the nightmare was finally over. Maybe now her life could get back to normal. She bent down and picked up the hairbrush and resumed brushing her hair until it shone in the light. 

Ms. Goodman gazed at Jasmine with a sprig of compassion in her eyes. Jasmine knew all she wanted to do was treat her but she didn’t feel up to admitting what had gone on. Not yet anyhow.   
“Jasmine, if you don’t tell me, I can’t help you.” Jasmine shook her head, she was still shaking. “You’ve got lesions to the face, bruises all down your legs and you’re covered in dried blood.” Jasmine said nothing as she gazed down at the scuffed floor tiles. “My point is, you’ve clearly been attacked but I can’t treat you until I know exactly what happened.” She sat beside Jasmine and looked at her in what was clearly intended to be a motherly sort of way.   
“I can’t tell you,” Jasmine mumbled.   
“Do you have anyone we can contact for you?” Jasmine thought for a minute. Her mother was more than likely still in India and the only other family she had here was...Jac Naylor. She didn’t think Jac would want to be bothered by this. Jasmine sighed; the only person she had right now was Charlie.   
“Charlie,” Jasmine said in a low whisper. “She brought me in,” Ms. Goodman nodded and beckoned Sandy over.   
“Sandy, see if this Charlie is still here,” Sandy just smiled as she went about her task. Ms. Goodman turned back to Jasmine who was still pale and shivering. “Is there no family we can call?” Jasmine made no reply and Ms. Goodman made a mental note to pull up her records as soon as she could.   
“Please just treat me and let me go home. I don’t want to be any bother,” Jasmine pleaded.   
“We’re going to get to the bottom of this,” Ms. Goodman informed her. Jasmine groaned. 

Jac pushed open the door to the nursery and stepped inside. She saw Jonny in rocking chair fast asleep, rocking gently back and forth. Her mouth curled into a beaming smile as she walked up to him. Jac placed a hand on his shoulder, softly, and gazed into the cot beside them where Hollie slept peacefully.   
“Am I dreaming,” Jonny mumbled to himself as his eyes fluttered open. He felt Jac’s hand on his shoulder and his whole demeanour lit up. “Jac,” he said simply.   
“No, it’s Mo,” Jac replied sarcastically.   
“Isn’t it a bit early for rhymes?” Jac scowled affectionately at him. “I must have fallen asleep in here,” Jonny conceded as he looked around the nursery. Jac shot him a knowing look as she waited for him to notice anything different about her. He was being a typical man, however, and wasn’t paying attention to the obvious. Jonny could tell from her look that he was supposed to mention something. “Your hair looks lovely,” he offered unhelpfully.   
“Try again,” Jac replied but she was secretly pleased by his comment. He looked over at her standing there.   
“So I wasn’t dreaming then,” he muttered.   
“Nope,” Jac replied evidently very pleased with herself.   
“And you’re sure you’re okay? No sudden pains, loss of feeling?” Jac shook her head vigorously.   
“I feel absolutely fine Jonny. In fact I feel better than fine!” Jonny laughed.  
“That’s, that’s really good to hear,” he said.   
“Well apart from a slight headache but that’ll probably pass lack of sleep most likely,” Jac said in one breath. Just as they were about to embrace each other Jac’s phone began to ring loudly.   
“Aren’t you gonna answer that?” Jonny asked. Jac sighed and took out her phone from her pocket.   
“Hello this is Jac Naylor speaking, can I help you?” There was silence between them as Jac waited for the voice on the other end to reply.   
“Hi, my name’s Ms. Jane Goodman, I’m the Senior Consultant at St. James’ Hospital,” Ms. Goodman’s voice was muffled but clear enough for Jac to understand. Jonny mouthed, “Who is it?” at her but Jac shook her head sharply.   
“I’m calling about a Jasmine Burrows,” Ms. Goodman continued. Jac was stunned. This was the last thing she had expected.   
“Yes?” Jac offered uncertainly. She could hear the sound of this Ms. Goodman clearing her throat on the other end.   
“I think you better come down here,” Ms. Goodman announced and with a sharp click she hung up, leaving Jac to stare at Jonny in disbelief. Jonny frowned as Jac put away the phone, fumbling with it in her trouser pocket.   
“Who was that?” He asked. Jac didn’t reply; she was already walking back towards the door, her face expressionless from shock. “Jac?” Jac shook her head and turned back to face him. She swallowed.  
“Something’s happened to Jasmine.” They both stood in silence, neither of them knowing what to do. Jac’s heart was thumping; Jonny’s chest heaving. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	14. Part Fourteen

PART FOURTEEN

 

The wind pounded them as Jac and Jonny rushed towards their car. Jac panicked for a second as her hand clasped around the door handle and wrenched it open. Jonny felt a gust of wind smack him squarely in the face; it knocked him backwards for a moment but he staggered back towards the car just as Jac slammed her door shut. With a final thrust of effort, Jonny clambered into the driver’s seat and fastened his seatbelt. He pulled the door shut against the flow of the gathering wind.   
“Are you okay?” Jonny turned to Jac who sat bolt upright, her face as white as milk. Her fingers fiddled with the seatbelt; they slipped and slid over the metal as she tried to fasten it. It was clear that her mind was on other things. He leaned over and helped her without waiting to be asked. “Jac?” Jonny’s voice was stern and comforting. Jac turned her head to look at him.   
“We have to go,” she said monotonously. Jonny turned the key and the car roared into life. Inside they could both hear the high-pitched wailing of the wind as it continued to batter the cars and buildings around them.   
“What did they say?” Jonny asked as he guided the car around a particularly sharp corner.   
“What did who say?” Jac replied; she was still unnaturally pale. Jonny gently pressed down on the accelerator and the car began to pick up speed as they drove down a main road.   
“The hospital! Did they say what had happened?” Jonny raised his voice to just below a shout as a lorry blared its horn in the opposite lane. Jac shook her head.  
“No,” she replied back to him. “They just said they were contacting next of kin.” Her face turned grey as a dark thought suddenly struck her. “What if she’s been killed?” Jonny had been thinking the same thing but he knew he had to convince Jac otherwise.   
“You can’t think like that Jac. I’m sure she’s okay,” Jonny told her but deep down he was not convinced.   
“That’s the point Jonny, we don’t know!” Jac’s face flushed with fear and a moment of regret. “She can’t be dead, she can’t be dead…” Her utterances faded into panicked mutters.   
“They would have told you,” Jonny said forcefully.   
“How far is it now?” Jac asked as she took a brief look out at the road stretching out in front of them.   
“Another five miles,” replied Jonny. Jac tapped the dashboard impatiently.   
“Can’t you go any faster?” Jonny laughed hollowly.   
“I’m already at the speed limit,” he said. Jac shrugged. The journey followed on in silence after that until Jonny saw his mobile flashing in the pocket under the stereo. “Jac, can you see who that is?” Jac rolled her eyes and reached for the phone. She held it up to her face and peered at the caller.   
“It’s Mo, shall I answer?” Jonny nodded as Jac slid the bar across the screen to answer.   
“Finally Maconie,” Mo’s voice crackled loudly.   
“It’s Jac, Jonny’s driving.” Jac sounded abrupt.   
“Right,” Mo said; she was momentarily flustered. “I just wanted to know what time to bring Hollie back to yours?” Jac rubbed her eyes as she thought desperately.   
“I don’t know how long we’re going to be,” she said after a long drawn out pause. “Is there a problem?” She could hear Mo’s forced laugh down the phone.   
“No, there’s no problem. I just thought I should check.”   
“Left up ahead,” Jac indicated to Jonny. Jonny nodded and turned on his indicators.   
“Left where?” Mo asked in a tone of bewilderment. Jac groaned.  
“Not you, I was talking to Jonny!”   
“Listen just call me when you know okay!” There was a click and Mo hung up. Jac let out a long deep breath. 

Charlie had dozed off in the chair beside Jasmine’s bed. Jasmine watched as her chest rose up and down in time with her breaths. Several thoughts went through her mind but she was determined not to let them consume her.   
“Are you ready to talk?” Jasmine looked up to see Ms. Goodman and a figure she didn’t recognise standing over her bed. The voice belonged to the stranger.   
“Jasmine this is Dr. Samantha Jones, she’s a police surgeon specialising in cases of sexual assault,” Ms. Goodman explained as Jasmine gave a puzzled stare.   
“Why do I need to speak to her?” Jasmine asked; she sounded irritable. “I haven’t been attacked.” Ms. Goodman forced herself to look kindly at Jasmine.   
“Jasmine, your injuries are consistent with those usually received by victims of sexual assault.” Jasmine turned over in the bed away from them.  
“I told you, I had an accident.” Dr. Jones removed her glasses and folded them away in her top pocket.   
“At least let me examine you,” Dr. Jones pleaded. “You don’t have to say or do anything, we just want to treat you to the best of our ability and we can’t do that unless we know all the facts, okay?” Jasmine said nothing, her heart was beating fast again and she felt sick to her stomach. “Jasmine?” Dr. Jones tried again.   
“Give her some time,” Ms. Goodman told Samantha reluctantly. Samantha shot her a distressed look.   
“That’s the thing, we haven’t got much time left.” The two doctors headed away from Jasmine’s bed to continue their chat in private.   
“What was that about?” Charlie said as she opened her eyes blearily. Jasmine shook her head indicating that she didn’t want to talk about it. “All righty then,” Charlie said and attempted to smile. Jasmine did not return it.   
“I’m sorry, I’m just not in the mood,” Jasmine said apologetically. Charlie was not perturbed.   
“Well I’ll just have to smile for both of us,” she announced. Jasmine had to suppress a small giggle. Charlie pounced on it: “See! There we go!” Jasmine shrugged.   
“Can I ask you something?” Jasmine’s voice was quiet and it seemed almost uneasy.   
“Sure,” Charlie said; she was still beaming brightly. Jasmine twiddled her thumbs trying to decide how best to broach the subject. “What’s the matter Jas?” Charlie prompted.   
“It’s just, I mean, I…” Jasmine’s voice trailed off as her thoughts took hold of her again. She swallowed and began again. “Why are you here?” Jasmine’s breathing grew heavier. “I mean not that I don’t like you being here, but you don’t really know me and I just…I don’t know.” To her relief Charlie continued to smile. She took hold of her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.   
“I don’t know how to explain it,” Charlie said in a quiet, thoughtful, voice. “I just know that I was meant to find you. That I’m meant to be here with you. Sounds crazy, I know but it’s true.” Jasmine didn’t know what to say but as she mulled it over in her mind, she knew that it was true. Charlie was still holding her hand. 

“Flight AIC456 will arrive at Heathrow Airport in just under ten minutes, thank you.” Paula Burrows slid back in her seat as the announcement came over the tannoy. She watched as the fasten seat belts light lit up above her. She closed her book and slid it back into her handbag beside her feet.   
“Excuse me,” Paula turned to the old man sitting beside her.   
“Can I help you?” Paula answered stoically. The old man cleared his throat with a dry, hacking, cough.   
“No dear, well I don’t think so anyway,” the old man rambled. “It was just you seemed to look a little lonely, that’s all.” Paula frowned but she decided to bite her tongue as she responded.   
“I suppose I am a little bit, yes.” The old man shot her a toothy grin before dissolving into another fit of coughing.   
“Do you live in India?” He enquired once his coughing had subsided for the time being.   
“I do, just outside Delhi,” Paula told him with a proud smile.   
“You’re coming to England to see family then?” Paula didn’t answer as she stared down at her feet. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to pry,” the old man added. “Always been too curious for my own good.” Paula wiped her eyes so that he wouldn’t see the glistening tears.   
“It’s okay,” she said in a broken voice. “Yes, I’m seeing family.” She looked away again as another tear silently rolled down her cheek.   
“I’m Richard,” the old man said, offering his hand to shake hers.   
“Paula,” she replied, accepting the hand.   
“We’re just about to touch down…” 

Henrik Hanssen looked fondly at the many different items that had once cluttered up his office, now put neatly away into boxes. It felt a little weird to see the room look so incredibly empty but Hanssen knew he had made the right choice. A ray of light on the photograph of Fredrik in the wastepaper basket caught his attention and Hanssen bent down to pick it up. He blew the dust off and tucked the photo into his wallet.   
“So this is where you’re hiding,” Hanssen blinked and stared as Serena Campbell came marching into his old office. She eyed up the boxes but made no comment.   
“Ms. Campbell,” Hanssen acknowledged her. “Getting your feet under the desk before my seat is even cold?” He asked. Serena suppressed a small laugh.   
“Is that all you take me for? I just came to say goodbye and good luck for the future.” Hanssen let slip a slight smile.  
“Thank you,” he said quietly. “Care to stay for a few minutes?” Serena thought about it for a few moments and then nodded.   
“I don’t see why not,” Serena said; she watched Hanssen pour two glasses of whiskey for them. She took hers and twiddled her thumb around it. Hanssen took a small sip.   
“I’m tired Serena,” he said as he placed the glass back on the desk; the whiskey inside swilling around.   
“Well you have put a lot of work into this place over the past few years,” Serena told him. She took a swig from her glass. “Mmm not bad,” she muttered as she set the glass back down.   
“It hasn’t been easy,” Hanssen told her. “I’m not sure if I achieved what I set out to achieve.” Serena stared at the frown lines on Hanssen’s forehead; he looked somehow older in this light. The toil of working at Holby had certainly taken its toll upon him.   
“In 50 years time, they will still be talking about the time Henrik Hanssen led Holby City,” Serena said proudly. Hanssen shook his head.  
“I fear my time here will be quietly forgotten,” he said; there was a hint of regret in his voice.   
“Nonsense,” Serena cut across him. “You will be remembered Henrik.” Hanssen didn’t know what to say to that so he took another sip of whiskey instead. “This is your legacy,” Serena continued.   
“My legacy,” Hanssen murmured. “Such an interesting choice of words.” He finished his whiskey. “I don’t believe this will be my legacy.”  
“What do you mean?” Serena asked in surprise. Hanssen took out the photo of Fredrik from his wallet and showed her.   
“This is my legacy, my family.” Serena smiled broadly at him and downed the rest of her whiskey. She shuddered as it burned through her.   
“And there is nothing more important than family,” she said gravely. Hanssen nodded as Serena stood up. “It’s been a privilege to work with you,” she said, extending her hand towards him. Hanssen took the proffered hand and shook it.   
“Take care of yourself,” Hanssen said in a quiet yet heartfelt tone of voice.   
“You too.” The atmosphere in the office was suddenly melancholic as the pair said their goodbyes. 

“Jac Naylor, I’m here to see Jasmine Burrows,” Jac said at the desk in a whirl of panic.   
“Just one moment please.” Jac began to tap her feet impatiently.   
“Please I need to see her now!” The man held up his hand as he typed something that Jac could not see.   
“Hold on,” he said. He still hadn’t looked at her. “Ms. Goodman will show you to her.” Jac turned around to see the so-called Ms. Goodman striding towards her.   
“Jac Naylor,” Jac introduced herself.   
“Well I can certainly see the resemblance between you two,” Ms. Goodman muttered and indicated Jac to follow her.   
“I’ll just stay here!” Jonny called after them with a dry hollow laugh. 

Ms. Goodman drew back the curtains and beckoned Jac towards her. The seat where Charlie had sat was empty and Jasmine was lying on her front, pretending to be asleep.   
“Jasmine,” Ms. Goodman whispered into her ear gently. Jasmine suddenly turned over and sat bolt upright. Her eyes widened in shock as she caught sight of Jac peering over her. “I’ll leave you two alone,” Ms. Goodman told Jac. She closed the curtains behind her as she went about her rounds.   
For a while neither of them spoke; they just stared at each other. The last time they had spoken hadn’t ended well for either of them and the memory of that encounter was clouding their thoughts. Jasmine winced as a spasm of pain passed through her body.   
“Are you okay?” Jac asked suddenly, taking the first step. Jasmine brushed her long red hair out of her eyes.   
“No,” she said looking everywhere she could except at Jac. “I’m not okay.” Jac could feel her legs growing tired and decided to sit down in the vacant chair. She couldn’t help noticing how weak Jasmine’s voice sounded.   
“What happened to you?” Jac’s question was barely louder than a whisper; her heartbeats were quickening. It suddenly hit her how little she really knew about this girl. She had never even given her a chance.   
“Why should I tell you?” Jasmine asked. It was a fair question, Jac thought. Neither of them could pretend they held any great love for one another. Yet she knew there was still time to fix it.   
“You don’t have to tell me,” Jac began; she was considering her answer in her head as she spoke. “I know things have never been good between us-“  
“Understatement,” muttered Jasmine.   
“Well, yeah,” Jac conceded. “I just mean, I’m here now. So, I don’t know. Tell me, or don’t tell me. It’s up to you.” Jasmine didn’t answer at first; she was frowning at Jac.   
“Sounds like a storm out there,” Jasmine said as she listened to the whistling of the wind battering against the outside walls.   
“Jasmine-“ Jac began again but Jasmine held up her hand and she fell silent.   
“I don’t know if I can tell you,” Jasmine tried to explain. “I mean, I want to tell you, I think. No that’s not it, it’s more, I need to tell you. I don’t know,” she paused to take a large gulp of water from the plastic cup beside her bed. She coughed and spluttered harshly as the water rushed down the wrong way. “But if I do tell you, you have to promise me something.” Jac raised her eyebrows in surprise.   
“What?”   
“You have to promise me things will be different between us,” Jasmine explained. “Please.” Jac mulled this over; she didn’t know how to respond. She had always told herself she didn’t have a sister and until recently that pretence had worked without a second thought. But now it was all different, Jac couldn’t pretend any more and seeing Jasmine lying like that in a hospital bed covered with scratches, cuts and bruises, made her finally realise something important. No matter the twisted history between them, they were still family. Jasmine was her family and they would always be drawn together by this bond between them.   
“I promise,” Jac said at last. She stood up and moved closer to Jasmine. “I’m so sorry Jasmine,” she leant over and put her arms around Jasmine carefully. “I should have been there for you all these years.”   
“It’s okay,” Jasmine said; she was barely able to conceal her sheer joy at finally being embraced by her older sister after all this time. “I never exactly made it easy for you.” Jac shook her head and Jasmine was startled to see the expression of deep regret etched across her face.   
“I was selfish, all I cared about was how I felt. About how she made me feel. I took my anger out on you, shut you out when we both could have used some comfort. It’s funny, you wouldn’t think I was the older one here.” Jasmine laughed quietly.   
“I’m glad you’re here,” she said and squeezed Jac’s hand. 

He stopped and took one last look at the hospital where he had truly made his name; a silent tear trickled down his otherwise stoic face and with a leather bag tucked tightly under his arm, Henrik Hanssen turned away from Holby City for the last time.   
“Are you ready?” Maja asked him as she stared out of the taxi window. Hanssen bent down and nodded. He opened the door and climbed in beside her.   
“Airport,” Hanssen instructed the driver. As the taxi sped up taking Hanssen further and further away from the hospital, he took Maja’s hand in his and smiled at her.   
“To family,” Maja said.   
“To family,” Hanssen agreed. The hospital was completely out of sight now and Henrik Hanssen felt a slight pang as he realised he would never set foot inside it again, he would never again walk down the many different corridors or sit at the desk he had made his own. But he knew it was all worth it; family was everything. No, Hanssen thought, family is everything. 

“Jonny!” Jonny could hear Mo panicking at the other end; she was talking nonstop yet none of it seemed to make any sense to him.   
“Mo, Mo listen to me, you have to slow down! What’s happened?” Mo took a deep breath.   
“Jonny it’s not my fault, I don’t know what to do. It just happened.” Jonny frowned.   
“What happened? Mo, you’re scaring me.” He waited for Mo’s response; she was breathing heavily and erratically. It was almost as if she was having some kind of panic attack.   
“It’s Hollie,” Mo said at last after she had finally managed to regain her composure. “She’s not breathing.” The colour drained out of Jonny’s face in a single flash; his whole body tensed up and he felt his hands go numb. His fingers slipped over his phone and it seemed to fall in slow motion towards the tiled floor. “Jonny? Jonny? Jonny?” Mo was still shouting but Jonny either could not or would not answer. He felt faint from the shock; there was only one thing going through his mind. How could this be happening? 

“Jonny answer me!” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	15. Part 15

PART FIFTEEN

“Jonny answer me!” Mo’s words flashed through his mind but Jonny was rooted to the spot. He couldn’t move; it was as if his legs had forgotten how they were supposed to work. He stared fixedly at his phone lying on the floor by his feet. There was one thing he had to do; he had to tell Jac. Yet as Jonny turned to look across the ward, another thought suddenly struck him. Now was not the best time to burden Jac with this. What was this? Jonny asked himself. They didn’t even know what had happened, perhaps Mo had overreacted? Jonny knew deep down this wasn’t true. He blinked. He was still standing there, still unable to walk away. Jonny cracked his neck and leant down to pick up his discarded phone. The call was still running. 

2 hours earlier

Mo closed the front door behind her as Jac and Jonny struggled through the wind to their car. She turned to stare lovingly at Hollie who was sat on the side table with her short legs dangling uselessly over the edge. The little girl looked up at Mo and smiled faintly.  
“Now you’re not gonna give auntie Mo any trouble are you?” Mo wagged a finger at Hollie who replied with a giggle. “Thought not,” said Mo. She scooped Hollie up from the table and carried her down the hallway into the kitchen. Immediately on realising where she was being taken, the little girl began to cry. Soft crocodile tears floated down her cheeks but she stopped when she saw Mo reach into the fridge and draw out a tiny bottle of baby milk. Hollie gurgled.   
“Hungry then?” Mo laughed as she fed the milk to the girl who gobbled it down greedily. In moments the bottle was empty and Hollie seemed satisfied for the moment. Mo smiled at her again as she let out a small yawn. “Wanna go upstairs?” Mo asked. Hollie made no movement. “Sleepy times?” At this Hollie nodded fervently and Mo couldn’t help laughing out loud. She picked the girl up in her arms once again and began to carry her up the steep flight of steps to the nursery. 

Simon groaned and rolled over on to his back. Every inch of his body ached although he couldn’t remember why. His head was killing him; the pain of the headache so blinding for a moment he wondered if he had literally lost his sight. Don’t be ridiculous, Simon thought as he slapped his cheek hard with his right hand. The shock of the impact brought his surroundings swimming back to him. He was lying at the bottom of the stairs. He wondered how he had got there. Simon stood up and swayed unsteadily on his feet. The house felt eerily quiet even though he knew he wasn’t alone. Jasmine was upstairs, still asleep most likely. An uneasy thought struck him as he gazed blearily up the stairs.   
“Jas?” He called out hopefully but there was no response. No helpful answer, no reassuring call back. “Jasmine?” He tried again, this time raising his voice a little louder although he sounded hoarse and breathless. A sharp pain shot through his liver and for a brief second it seemed as if Simon was about to collapse backwards. It was sheer force of will that kept him standing. Something was desperately wrong, he knew it, but there were far more important matters on his mind. “Jasmine!” He raised his voice again, now barely less than a shout but still there was no reply. A terrible consideration began to dawn on him; maybe she wasn’t here? He shook his head. That was preposterous, of course she was here. The girl was probably just catching up with sleep. Now he came to think about it, the last time he recalled seeing his daughter she had appeared to be very tired. Just as he had decided to let her sleep for another hour, the same pain shot through his liver again. Simon swayed even more unsteadily on his feet and began to climb awkwardly up the stairs. He hung desperately on to the bannisters for balance. 

 

Charlie placed her phone back into her pocket and turned her gaze back to Jasmine. Jasmine was very pale and her teeth chattered even though it wasn’t cold at all.   
“Here,” Charlie said, offering Jasmine her coat. Jasmine shook her head.   
“I’m fine,” she said with a faint smile. Charlie was having none of it:  
“Don’t be stupid, you’re freezing!” Gratefully, Jasmine accepted the offer of the coat and wrapped it around her shoulders.   
“Thanks,” she said. Her teeth continued to chatter but at least she could feel some warmth at last. Charlie seemed to be watching her intently but she remained silent. Jasmine wasn’t quite sure what she really made of her just yet; she had shown herself to be kind and generous and probably a damn sight more helpful than the majority of her own family. Yet on the other hand she didn’t even know who she was, not really. Charlie stifled a yawn with the back of her hand. “You’re tired,” Jasmine said softly out of the corner of her mouth. Charlie grinned.  
“Yeah, I suppose I am a bit,” she said and let out a tiny giggle. Then she straightened up in the chair, cleared her throat and looked upon Jasmine in a much more serious manner. “So are you gonna tell them?” She asked in a determined whisper. Jasmine narrowed her eyes at her.   
“Tell who, what?” It was Charlie’s turn to narrow her eyes now.   
“Ms. Goodman and Dr. Jones,” Charlie began. “About what happened to you.” Jasmine turned away from her.  
“I don’t want to talk about that.” Her voice was final but Charlie wasn’t giving up easily either. She tried a different tactic.   
“Look Jas, you don’t have to tell them everything…I mean I don’t know everything myself, you just need to tell them enough to let them treat you.” Jasmine fought back tears as she considered this. She didn’t know why she wasn’t telling anyone. Was it to protect him? The tears became a sarcastic harsh laugh that she struggled to stifle. She rolled back over to see Charlie was still watching her.   
There was something about this woman that she couldn’t quite put her finger on; the way she caught her looking at her sometimes. Though strange as it was, Jasmine found herself somehow liking it. It was nice to be looked at with interest for once. A pang of guilt ran through her. That wasn’t fair, Jasmine thought. There was still Nick but even as she cast her mind back to him she didn’t get the same feeling of serenity she got from Charlie watching her. Nick was nice, not very reliable but he was nice. Jasmine brought her left hand out from underneath the bedsheets and began to stare at it. She studied the scratch marks and bruises but she felt nothing. She felt no anger, no pain, just nothing.   
“Jas?” Charlie’s voice was like an echo, faint in the distance and fading further still. 

Simon made a desperate grab for something to hold on to as he toppled through the open doorway into Jasmine’s room. He hit the ground with a dull thud but quickly picked himself back up and dusted down his vomit stained jacket. The first thing he noticed was Jasmine’s bed. It was empty. Incandescent rage swept through him and he kicked the foot of the bed. He achieved nothing but a new pain in his big toe. His mind began to clear; memories started to flood back to him. All thoughts became replaced by a single objective. He had to find Jasmine, wherever she was. He had to stop her. No, Simon thought. He had to explain. Yes, that sounded better. He reached into his jacket pocket and drew out the small bottle of vodka he had stashed there the night before. There were only a few drops left but it was enough to satisfy him as he knocked it back. He felt the empty bottle slide out of his hands and hit the floor.   
“Where are you, you little bitch?” Almost as soon as the words had escaped him, Simon felt suddenly regretful. But it was only a brief regret as his mind became clouded again. He staggered out of the room and back down the stairs, clinging on to the bannisters as he had done before. Every part of him was still aching and the pain in his liver was becoming constant, gaining intensity with every step he made. He had to ignore it, Simon thought desperately. He stopped dead in his tracks. There was something on the carpet just next to the front door. Simon stooped down and ran his fingers through the soft brown dirt. “I’ve gotcha,” he murmured to himself. Simon opened the front door and to his delight he could easily make out the faint pattern of footprints leading away from the house. They were small and narrow. Easily a girl’s, Simon thought. The direction of the footprints puzzled him; where had she been going? He scratched his head and looked the opposite way. That was the main road over there, so why had Jasmine chosen to go that way? It doesn’t matter,” Simon told himself. Just find her. He put his left foot forward precariously and began to follow the path laid out before him. 

Mo’s fingers were sweaty as she fiddled with the small packet of peanuts in her lap. She kept one watchful eye on Hollie who appeared to be sleeping peacefully at last after a steady half-hour of protest. Something rumbled in the background. Mo looked up and stared out the window in time to see a flash of forked yellow lightning.   
“Thunder,” she murmured under her breath. It had sounded far off so they were probably safe from any storms. What was it you had to do with thunder and lightning? Mo wondered. There was something about counting. Was it the seconds between them? Mo felt sure of it. You counted the seconds after the thunderclap until the lightning flashed; the less time it took, the nearer the storm. Yes, that was it, Mo decided. She didn’t feel too sure however. That had been about fifteen seconds. Nothing to worry about. The thunder rumbled again outside but it was faint. If there was a storm, it certainly wasn’t going to be much here.   
Mo turned her attention back to the stubborn packet that still refused to open. She tugged at it from both sides but her fingers would not grip the packaging.   
“Come on!” She said a little too loud; she chanced a quick look at Hollie but the girl was still sleeping soundly. Mo breathed a sigh of relief but it was soon replaced by a muttered curse under her breath as the packet finally gave way, spilling peanuts all over the floor. “Dammit,” Mo said softly as she got down on her knees and began to pick up all the peanuts that now rolled around the carpet. She didn’t notice as a single, solitary peanut rolled silently under Hollie’s cut and seemingly out of sight. Irritated, Mo scooped up the remaining peanuts and threw the lot of them into the bin. She didn’t fancy them now that they had been on the floor. Her stomach rumbled. She looked over at Hollie again.   
“I’m just gonna get some food downstairs, okay? Yeah you’re okay,” Mo couldn't help smiling at Hollie’s sleeping face. She looked so peaceful as her little chest rose up and down in time with her breathing. It amazed her how much the girl had grown since she had last seen her. Her red hair, even more fiery than Jac’s, seemed to shine in the faint light of the nursery. As her stomach gave another low moan, Mo snapped her fingers and walked away. She closed the door behind her; in the shadow of the cot, Hollie opened one eye and peered through the crack in the frame. The light of the hallway seemed dazzling to her but she felt safe. 

Simon staggered through the cold, wet mud. His shoes were not made for cross-country terrain and every so often he had to stop to prise them out of the clutches of particularly sticky dirt. He cursed loudly; there was no one around to hear him. The sky above him had become increasingly dark in the half hour since he had set foot yet it could not be any later than mid-afternoon. He felt clammy. The colour was draining out his face but he had to keep going. He had to find her. Simon forced his legs to carry him forward but his whole strength was beginning to fail him.   
“Get a move on,” he told himself angrily. He staggered forward a few more steps but then he swayed severely and almost fell. He held his hand out to stop him and as he regained his balance, he thought for a split second that perhaps he was going to be fine. Searing pain swept suddenly through his liver and Simon felt his legs crumble under his weight. His insides were on fire and he was screaming as his face hit the mud. He was still conscious, spitting out fragments of twig and dirt. The pain became unbearable and his legs would not move. Simon groaned and forced himself to roll over onto his back. The strain of the effort caused him to black out for a few seconds.   
Simon began to panic as his breathing grew more and more erratic. This was not happening, he thought in horror as his body exploded with a fresh wave of pain washing over him. He was sweating; small droplets of moisture rolled down his forehead. He had to call for help. Why hadn’t he thought of this earlier? But before he could reach into his pocket to take out his phone, his liver seared again and everything went white. He could see dazzling stars shining down on him; they made him feel dizzy. His strength was almost gone and his panicking was replaced by sheer fear. He could feel his heart thumping strenuously. He was all alone in this godforsaken field of shit and mud. What if no one found him? He shivered at this terrible thought. Cold sweat started to drench him all over as his eyelids drooped and he slid out of consciousness. Tiny drops of rain fell from the sky and struck his face but Simon did not move. He lay spreadeagled in the wet mud, his chest rising up and down but he did not wake. The drops became a steady pour; they splashed all over Simon. He needed help but no help was coming. 

“Charlie?” Jasmine’s voice was hollow and faint. Charlie opened her eyes instantly and stared at her.  
“Yeah?” She attempted to sound relaxed but Jasmine noticed the slight crack as she spoke. She decided not to question it.   
“Can you promise me something?” Jasmine appeared to be pleading with her and she sounded so scared that Charlie almost felt scared herself. She had a nagging feeling she knew what was about to follow and she wondered briefly if she was ready for it.   
“Of course,” Charlie murmured. “Of course I can.” Jasmine forced herself to smile but the muscles in her face did not respond.   
“Promise me you won’t think any differently of me,” Jasmine said slowly and quietly. Each word was formed very deliberately.   
“I promise,” Charlie replied at once. She felt sure that Jasmine was about to tell her what had happened. The trust being placed in her was almost unnerving. Jasmine took a deep breath and sighed.   
“It wasn’t an accident,” Jasmine began. Her chest heaved up and down as she spoke and it was clear how difficult she found it. The words hung in the air as Jasmine explained the events that had led her to this. “He held me down and he…” Jasmine’s voice broke and she began to cry silently. She rocked back and forth in the bed; her whole body was shaking. “My own dad…” Jasmine forced the words out in between another bout of falling tears. Charlie had no words to say, she just sat in silence. Her face was a vivid white. “Dad’s are meant to protect you aren’t they?” Jasmine’s question was almost an accusation. Charlie nodded.  
“Yes,” she said softly. “Yes, they are.” Jasmine’s eyes were red.  
“He’s not my dad. Not any more,” her words were quiet but their impact was thunderous. Charlie reached out and grabbed her hand.   
“What are you going to do?” She asked as Jasmine wiped the tears away from her face with her free hand.   
“I’m going to fight,” Jasmine said. Her eyes flashed determinedly. Charlie nodded slowly.   
“I’ll help you,” Charlie started to say quietly. “If you want me to,” she added. Jasmine’s lips curled into a very small smile; it was almost unnoticeable except to Charlie.   
“I do,” she spoke softly but Charlie heard it loud and clear. 

Hollie wasn’t sure why she did it. She reached through the gap in the bars and pushed her tiny hand under the cot. Her fingers closed around something small. She paused, listening out for the sound of auntie Mo below. Satisfied at last that the coast was clear, Hollie grabbed at the object and moved her hand back inside the cot. She opened her palm and stared at the oval shaped object sitting in the centre of it. It was small and had a dull colour that Hollie wasn’t sure of the name of. She lifted it to her nose and sniffed it. Her nostrils flared but Hollie ignored the warning. A crazy idea floated in her tiny mind. Everywhere was quiet as the little girl slipped the peanut into her mouth and began to suck. Pain swept through her; her mouth felt itchy and in her panic, Hollie swallowed the nut. As the peanut passed down her throat she felt the itchiness spread and follow it. She was breathing heavily; she wanted to cry but no tears would form. Her lips were beginning to swell up, red and puffy.   
Mo pushed open the nursery door and stepped inside. The sight that greeted her caused her mouth to fall open. Stunned by shock, Mo rushed over to Hollie who lay motionless in her crib. The girl’s lips were swollen twice their usual slice and there were red patches all over her body. It took Mo a few seconds to realise that she was no longer breathing. Terror swept over her; despite all her years of medical training she suddenly found herself utterly useless. Hollie was still not breathing, they were running out of time. Ambulance, Mo thought. She wondered why it hadn’t occurred to her before. She took out her phone in her trembling hands and dialled the number. 

Charlie’s mind was whirring; she hadn’t known Jasmine for any length of time at all and yet the connection between them was growing all the time. Every time she looked at her, she felt a tiny pang in her heart. It wasn’t pain however, it was yearning. Through all the cuts, bruises and other marks, Charlie could see one thing about this girl. She was beautiful. Her strong auburn hair, redder than it was dark, glowed and her skin seemed so soft. Charlie wanted to run her fingers through that shining hair, it was all she could do to stop herself.   
“Stop it,” Charlie muttered. “She’s got enough going on without this.” But Charlie couldn't stop it. Her feelings grew stronger with every passing minute. What harm was there in speaking out? Her insides squirmed. There was plenty harm, she reminded herself as memories of similar situations flooded back to her. Every time Charlie fell for someone it was never reciprocated. Yet rather than develop a thick skin and she had kept coming back again and again and every time she had been met with the same. The same sorry excuse they all used. I’m flattered but you’re not my type. Charlie knew she couldn’t force someone to like her, but just once she wished someone would. Her eyes lingered on Jasmine’s face; she felt sure the girl was staring back at her. Charlie decided. Whatever harm there was in telling was less than there was in bottling it up.   
“You’re staring,” Jasmine said faintly. “Something up?” Charlie nodded uncertainly; her insides had turned to jelly and she couldn’t remember the last time she had felt this sick with nerves.   
“I need to tell you something,” Charlie began anxiously. She tucked her thumb under her fingers; she always did this when she was really scared. She felt Jasmine’s eyes burning into the back of her skull as she stared at the floor.   
“What is it?” Jasmine’s voice brought her firmly back down to earth. Charlie gathered her thoughts; if Jasmine had had the strength to tell her story, she had the strength to tell hers.   
“I think…I think,” She fell silent. The words were forming in her mouth but they refused to be spoken. She shook herself and swallowed. “I think I like you.” Charlie let out a huge sigh as she realised she had finally said it. She felt proud of herself for not saying love, it was far too early for any of that. Like was the best word, she was sure of it. Jasmine was awfully silent. The same fear that always struck her was beginning to wash over Charlie. “Jas?” Charlie said in a low whisper; she didn’t want to say too much, it was best not to rush things. She needed an answer however.   
“I need time to think,” Jasmine said at last. She wasn’t sure how she felt about the sudden revelation. She had never been in this situation before, she didn’t know what she was supposed to do. The one thing that struck her was that she wasn’t horrified by the idea. She could see the panic and terror in Charlie’s eyes and in an instance all she wanted to do was comfort the girl even though she was the one lying in a hospital bed. She began to wonder if perhaps, she was falling for Charlie too. The feelings were alien to her, they felt strange yet liberating.   
“I’m going to grab a coffee,” Charlie said suddenly. “Leave you to think without distractions.” Jasmine nodded. Charlie squeezed her hand quickly and pulled back the curtains. As Charlie’s footsteps echoed away, Jasmine lay back in the bed. Her mind was teeming with thoughts and feelings. She closed her eyes; Nick’s face floated in and out of her dreams but then as she concentrated deeper, she watched as his face morphed slowly into Charlie’s. It grew clearer and clearer until all her thoughts were of Charlie and the bombshell she had dropped. 

The waiting was the hardest part, Mo thought although it had only been a couple of minutes since she had phoned the paramedics. Their response times were averaging at around 5 minutes and so she knew that help would soon be there. Something was nagging at her. How had Hollie become so ill without her noticing anything before? Nothing about it smelt right. The little girl had been perfectly fine when she went downstairs; Mo was trying to mull the situation over in her mind, desperately searching for answers that she could not find. She remembered how she had left Hollie in her cot, sleeping soundly. The minutes ticked by like hours; each second seemed to go on forever. 

Present

“Jonny!” Jonny found himself shaken back down to earth by the sound of Mo’s panicked voice calling at him from his phone. He lifted it back up to his face.   
“Get her to hospital now!” Jonny said; he sounded confident and commanding. “I’m on my way.”  
“What about Jac?” Jonny made the decision in an instance, there was no time to waste.   
“I’ll deal with Jac,” he told Mo as his heart felt suddenly leaden. He could not afford to worry about that now, however, as Jonny started to stride away. His pace became a jog.

TO BE CONTINUED


	16. Chapter 16

PART SIXTEEN

“Coming through!” The paramedics burst through the double doors into resus carrying Hollie. Mo had followed behind them; tears streamed down her face but she was kept outside. The tears mingled with her mascara as it ran. Hollie’s condition had worsened severely in the ambulance and the expressions of the two paramedics were grave as they laid the baby down. A blond man with a plaid shirt walked over to them, a stethoscope wrapped around his collar.   
“What have we got here?” Sean, the on-call paediatric registrar asked sharply as he took quick glance at Hollie’s red and swollen lips.   
“Six-month-year-old infant, suspected anaphylaxis,” the first paramedic informed him; his voice was dour.   
“Get me 10 milligrams of adrenaline,” Sean called to the senior nurse. “Now!” He barked as Kate fumbled with the preparation. The baby was breathing but only barely.   
“Sean?” Kate said as she watched the paediatrician perform the basic checks on Hollie. The adrenaline seemed to be working but the child was still extremely ill.   
“What?” Sean replied; he sounded distracted.   
“I think I know who that is,” Kate told him, staring fixedly at the red hair adorning Hollie’s head. Sean stared at her, nonplussed.   
“Who?” Kate took a deep breath before she answered.  
“That’s Jac Naylor’s little girl,” she said at last. The colour drained from Sean’s face in seconds. Jac’s reputation was fierce, even in the Emergency Department.   
“You can’t be serious?” Sean asked, desperately hoping that Kate was mistaken but the more he looked at Hollie the more he recognised the same features that had terrified him as an F1 student. Kate shook her head. It was at this moment that Sean caught a sight of Mo standing outside the doors, looking into resus; her eyes were blotchy and red from crying. “Who’s that?” Sean indicated Mo.   
“Mo Effanga, registrar on Darwin,” Kate replied.   
“Do you like know everyone in this hospital?” Sean asked sarcastically.   
“Shall I go talk to her?” Kate asked, ignoring him. Sean looked up from Hollie, looking momentarily out of it.   
“What? Oh yeah, go ahead. She’s stable at the minute.” Kate nodded at him and strode away towards the doors. “Where the hell are the parents?” Sean muttered under his breath. 

“What’s going on? Is she okay? Can I see her?” Mo bombarded Kate with questions the moment she walked through the double doors.   
“The infant has suffered a severe anaphylactic shock; she’s stable but we’re going to have to keep her on observation,” Kate reassured her. “Now if I could confirm some details with you?” Mo nodded but it was clear she wasn’t paying her fullest attention. “The child is Hollie Naylor-Maconie, yes?”   
“Yes,” Mo said, her lips quivering.   
“Parents Jac Naylor and Jonny Maconie?” Mo nodded again. Kate scribbled the information down in the notes. “Sorry, you know how it is. We have to be thorough. Do you have any idea where they are?” Mo stole another desperate look into resus; she watched Sean checking injecting Hollie with something. It seemed to help.   
“Sorry what?”   
“Jac, Jonny. Where are they?” Kate reiterated.   
“St. James’,” Mo replied. “Jac’s with her sister. Jonny’s on his way.” Kate raised an eyebrow. “I called him” Mo added. 

Jasmine made a small grimace as she lent over to pick up the glass of water on the table beside her bed. Jac made to help her but Jasmine shook her head determinedly.   
“I need to tell you something,” Jasmine said, taking a sip of water before setting the glass back on the table and leaning back against the uncomfortable hospital pillow. Jac looked surprised.   
“You can tell me,” she said uncertainly; she wasn’t sure what else to say. Jac found these situations difficult.   
“It’s about what happened to me,” Jasmine explained. She watched Jac intently, looking for any sign of a reaction. Jac just nodded instead. Jasmine took a deep breath; her face was pale, clammy. Jac had a nasty feeling in the pit of her stomach as though she knew what Jasmine was about to tell her. The feeling began to squirm and as Jasmine told her story, Jac’s worst fears were confirmed.   
“I’ll kill him, I swear I will kill that man,” Jac said angrily; her lips were pale and her eyes flashed with rage. Jasmine laid a hand on her upper arm.  
“Please, don’t,” she said softly. “I’m not going to let him get away with it.”   
“Good!” Jac raised her voice at first but a look from Jasmine told her to calm down. “He deserves to rot,” she added in a furious whisper. Jasmine stared into space; she was lost in her thoughts.   
“I never realised how bloody dull hospital decor was,” she muttered absentmindedly.   
“Jasmine?” Jac frowned. Jasmine brought her gaze back down to Jac’s.   
“Sorry, there’s just not much to do in here.” She attempted a weak smile.   
“Have you told anyone else? If you’re going to fight this, you need to tell the doctors,” Jac was determined to get through to Jasmine who looked as if she would rather fall back to sleep again.   
“Don’t worry Jackie, I’m going to,” Jasmine said, laying her head down on the pillow.   
“Don’t call me Jackie,” Jac said automatically. She sighed. “Sorry, I just want you to be okay.”   
“I know,” Jasmine replied sleepily.   
“The longer you put it off the less chance you have at getting a conviction. He will get away with this!” The curtains behind her opened and Ms. Goodman cleared her throat behind her.   
“Jasmine needs rest, perhaps you could come back later?” Jac said nothing as she brushed past her. “Charming,” Ms. Goodman muttered.   
“She’s just worried,” Jasmine murmured from the bed; her eyes were shut but she was still sound awake.   
“Yes about that, are you prepared to tell us what really happened yet?” Jasmine rolled over and pretended to fall asleep. “Patients,” Ms. Goodman snorted derisively. “They never do help themselves. Always expect us to pick up the pieces.” She scribbled a note on the clipboard before placing it back at the foot of Jasmine’s bed. “And yes, you were meant to hear that.” Jasmine opened an eye cautiously. 

“That goes there, no wait that goes there. Hang on, but if that goes there then that has to go there but…dammit!” Serena swore loudly as the door behind her opened.   
“Something wrong?” Edward asked. He eyed the pile of folders on Serena’s desk.   
“Are you only here to ask stupid questions or can I help you with something?” Serena was stressed and it seemed that was apparent as Edward walked into her office despite the air of fear that most would experience in the same encounter.   
“It’s nothing,” Edward said. “Can I give you a hand with that?” Serena glared at him as she sifted through another thick and heavy folder.   
“I’ve got too much on to deal with you now Edward,” Serena yawned and picked up another folder before cursing at the coloured coding on its front. Edward frowned at her.  
“Serena, how long have you been doing this for?”   
“What are you talking about? You know how long I’ve been doing this for,” Serena replied incredulously.   
“No, I mean how long have you been doing this for,” Edward indicated the pile of folders.   
“Oh,” Serena’s voice seemed faint. “Not long,” she said quickly. She made to pick up another folder but Edward placed his hand on her wrist, stopping her.   
“You need a break,” he told her firmly. Serena shook her head.   
“I don’t have time for a break, I’ve got to get this all categorised before the end of my shift!” Edward did not budge.   
“Let me help,” Edward offered but Serena shook her head.  
“No, I couldn’t possibly. Anyway you’ve got patients to deal with.” Edward glanced up at the clock.   
“As of five minutes ago, I’m off-shift.” Serena shrugged.   
“I suppose it couldn’t hurt,” she conceded. Edward smiled at her.  
“Just let me help.” Serena nodded and set about explaining where each folder was meant to go. She indicated six piles laid out in front of her. 

Jonny sprinted through the doors and skidded into the ED reception. His desperation caused him to collide with a student nurse carrying a tray into cubicles. The nurse, who’s name was Kelly, crashed to the floor, dropping the tray with a loud clatter. Packaged needles and other medication scattered haphazardly across the floor and under the seats. Jonny made a muttered apology but continued to run towards resus despite the angry protestations of those around him. He chanced a quick look at the commotion behind him and knew that he should go back and help but Hollie was only seconds away from him now. He couldn’t stop. His heart was pounding in his chest; all he cared about was getting to his daughter. The doors were right ahead of him; Jonny’s run slowed into a fast-paced walk. He pushed the doors open forcefully and strode inside.   
“Sir you can’t come barging in here like this!” Kate told him with irritation etched in her eyes.   
“That’s my daughter lying there so don’t you dare tell me I can’t be here,” Jonny’s face was white and there was no mistaking the fear in his expression.   
“Finally decided to show then,” Sean snarled. Jonny looked over his shoulder to see the paediatric registrar stroll casually into view. Jonny glared at him, his face flashing angrily.  
“I came as quickly as I could.” Sean snorted and looked as if he was about to make an inflammatory comment but Kate held up a hand to silence him. Jonny was breathing heavily. “Can someone please tell me what’s going on?”   
“Hollie has suffered anaphylaxis,” Sean began; Jonny’s eyes widened in terror. “It’s okay, she’s stable and improving rapidly. The swelling should go down soon.” Jonny was not reassured.   
“How did it happen?” Sean and Kate exchanged worried glances that stirred the hairs on the back of Jonny’s neck.   
“I think perhaps you should go to the relatives room,” Kate said putting her arm around Jonny’s shoulder. Jonny brushed it away and looked directly at Sean.   
“How did it happen?” Sean bit his lip.

Mo stared at Jonny. He didn’t move, say or do anything. He just sat there, his expression white and his eyes fixed upon the floor. He hadn’t said a single word to Mo since he’d been ushered into the relatives room by Kate.   
“Jonny?” Mo asked tentatively. He ignored her, his fists clenched. “Jonny Mac talk to me,” Mo tried again. Jonny looked at her. It was a start, Mo thought but then he opened his mouth.  
“Peanuts,” he said; his voice was deathly quiet.   
“I’m sorry?” Mo asked but there was a sinking feeling in her heart.   
“It was a peanut,” Jonny continued. He was staring at the floor again but his chest was rising up and down angrily.   
“What do you mean?”   
“Oh I think you know what I mean,” Jonny snapped but his voice was still unnaturally quiet. “My daughter is in there fighting for her life because of a peanut that you gave to her.”   
“I didn’t give-“ Mo began but Jonny cut across her.  
“You know I can’t believe you could be so stupid!” Mo wished he would shout; this quiet anger was far worse. “You gave a peanut to a baby!” His eyes flashed furiously but Mo knew there was nothing she could say or do to make things right. “She could have died Mo,” Jonny murmured but his voice cracked as he spoke. “She could have died.” Mo felt a silent tear roll down her cheek.   
“I’m-“  
“Don’t say you’re sorry. I don’t want to hear that,” Jonny’s lips trembled and his hands were shaking. He stood up suddenly. “I can’t sit in here, I have to be with her.” Mo made no effort to stop him; she wouldn’t have even if she could. Jonny turned back to look at her. “I’m not sure if I can forgive you,” he said and to Mo’s horror she saw that he was crying. “I can’t be friends any more.” Mo felt as if she had just been stabbed in the heart; the pain was excruciating. “I’m sorry.” Jonny made to open the door but then he turned and gazed at Mo again. For a brief moment, Mo thought he might perhaps have reconsidered but she knew deep down it was not so. “I just don’t think I can ever trust you again,” Jonny explained. “Not after this.” He walked out of the relatives room, closing the door behind him. The echoing crash hung about the room as Mo sat in a stunned silence. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	17. Part 17

PART SEVENTEEN

Life is a curious thing. For some it is but a short time spent on this earth in these bodies, but for others, it is a slow torture that continues on and on with no sign of stopping. People are dealt good cards and bad cards. Sometimes the good outweighs the bad and they’re able to go about their daily routines without too much stress or too much worry and no matter what happens they know that at least they are alive. For some, however, the bad begins to accumulate; it builds up and up and up until they can’t take any more. They yearn for it to end but all they really want is freedom. Freedom from this hell. 

***

The sun had begun to set and Simon lay face down in the cold hard mud. His limbs spasmed and his lips were cracked and dry. He attempted to open his eyes but the strain was too much as he felt his chest heave up and down. There were bright stars hovering in front of him but as he tried to snatch at them with his weakened arms, he felt his hands pass through cold fragile air. His strength faded with every breath and he knew there wasn’t much time left but what could he do? Simon had no idea where he even was. He kicked himself for being rash, for not waiting. His mind flickered back to when it had all gone so wrong; when everything had fallen into this endless abyss of pain and suffering. His stomach wretched and he vomited dark red blood all over the mud. The stars grew brighter as the pain intensified. It didn’t seem possible to him, as he lay there in total unending agony, that less than a year earlier everything had been so much clearer. He had felt like nothing in the world could bring him down but that was before everything changed. That was before he had lost everything. Simon let out a shrieking gasp of pain and felt his mind slip out of consciousness. 

9 months earlier

Simon sat at his desk twiddling his fingers around a sharpened HB pencil. All around him there were men and women sat at desks, their eyes fixed upon bright computer screens and hands clutched around ringing telephones. The office was always fairly busy Simon reflected as he returned his attention to the screen in front of him.   
“Hey Si,” a scrunched up scrap of paper struck him on his forehead. Simon swallowed and looked over in the direction it had come. The thrower was a short woman with long brunette hair and broad winning smile. Simon let out a snort of laughter.   
“Nice aim Daniella,” Simon conceded as he rubbed his forehead. “You bored?” He asked as an almost afterthought. Daniella yawned and threw her head back comically.   
“No, not especially,” Daniella replied with a wink. “I’m going out of my mind Si. It’s nearly half past 2 and I haven’t had a single thing to do since 11. Not even a stupid phone call.” Simon laughed.   
“This must be one of our quiet days,” he said as Daniella shot him a piercing look. “Don’t complain Dans, at least you don’t have to listen to Mr. Rogers every day.” Daniella sighed.   
“I’d rather Mr. Rogers than this torture.” She caught the look of horror on Simon’s face and she had to laugh. They had to laugh in that job otherwise it would get to them after a while. She remembered when Peter in HR had had that nervous breakdown. He was never the same again after that. He hadn’t lasted that much longer either, Daniella considered. She wondered where Peter was now, if perhaps he had found some happiness in a life that was slowly driving him insane. It had killed him leaving this place for as much as it took from him it had also been his only source of comfort as everything around him was slowly taken away. Everything had changed when the new manager, Vanessa, had swept in and made her mark. She stayed in her office for most of the time but there was no mistaking those puffy lips. Daniella felt sure she would see those lips in her nightmares. It was surely no coincidence that, since Vanessa’s takeover, the shares in the company had suffered a decline from which they might never recover.   
“Do you know what his problem was today?” Simon’s voice cut through her thoughts.   
“What?” She asked and the exasperated look on Simon’s face told her the latest phone call from Mr. Rogers had lived up to usual expectation.   
“He called up about 9, I’d only just settled in and I was halfway through a danish,” Simon explained as he absentmindedly typed something on his computer. Daniella snorted. “Anyway there I am trying to swallow it when he makes some stupid comment about lazy workers.”   
“The cheek of it,” Daniella interjected with a giggle. Simon smiled.   
“He’s unbelievable. It turns out he called because his mother-in-law was using his kitchen. Do you know what I can’t understand?”   
“What?”   
“That somebody actually married him.” As they both erupted into laughter they didn’t hear the sharp clunk of high-heeled shoes marching toward them. A dry cough brought them both crashing back down to earth.   
“Your numbers are down,” Vanessa Lytton barked at Daniella whilst her eyes remained fixed on Simon. Daniella slid back into her seat and brought up her emails. She watched as Simon stared back at Vanessa. He wasn’t flinching. 

Present Day

The atmosphere between them was tense and icy. Jasmine looked from Charlie to Jac to her mother. No one spoke. There was nothing to say. Jasmine had expected a fight when Paula had shown up at the hospital but so far Jac hadn’t even acknowledged she was there. Jac just sat in the small wooden chair with her eyes staring down at the floor. She felt a little awkward for Charlie who had no idea of the rift between her family. This was the last thing Jasmine needed right now especially after that police doctor had prodded and poked at her. It was Charlie who broke the silence.   
“So err you must be Paula,” Charlie began. “I’ve heard a lot about you,” she said as she extended her hand to Paula.   
“No you haven’t,” said Paula with a cold glance at Charlie. Jasmine felt a sudden desire to disappear under her sheets and never speak to anyone ever again. Charlie had blushed but she was determined not to let it bother her.  
“I’m Charlie,” she continued resolutely. Paula thought for a second and then accepted her outstretched hand.  
“Charmed, I’m sure,” she muttered. “And how do you know my daughter?” Charlie wasn’t quite sure how to answer this question. She swept her hair out of her eyes and took a deep breath.   
“It’s a funny story actually-“  
“Forget it,” Paula cut across her. “I’m not interested.” There was an exasperated sigh from the corner of the room.   
“You really are a cast-iron bitch,” Jac spat.   
“Have you met my eldest?” Paula said to Charlie, indicating Jac with a pointy finger. Jac stood up and walked up to her mother, her face flashed with anger and years of hurt.   
“Don’t get too close, she has a history of abandoning children,” Jac said acidly. Jasmine made a motion at Charlie that plainly said, “don’t ask.”   
“Please excuse Jacqueline, she’s not as clever as she likes to think she is,” Paula explained with a sickly sweet smile. Jac could feel the anger bubbling away inside her; she knew she had to keep her cool for Jasmine’s sake but that woman was so infuriating.   
“And how is my kidney?” Jac shot back at her.   
“Ah yes I wondered when you’d bring that up,” Paula continued to smile but it had become more of a forced grimace than anything else.   
8 months earlier 

Simon stared at the shining silver plaque on the door; Vanessa Lytton - Manager. He let out a shiver of frightened anticipation as he knocked sharply.   
“Come in,” Vanessa called from within her office. She didn’t sound angry, Simon thought but experience had taught him that this was not necessarily a good sign. Vanessa had learnt the art of appearing calm whilst in actuality being extremely angry. There was nothing he could do about it now however, he just had to bite his tongue and take whatever was coming to him. He pushed open the door and shuffled his feet inside. “Could you close the door thank you?” Vanessa asked with a smile that showed off her prominent puffy lips. Simon felt the sharp click as the door locked into place.   
“You wanted to see me,” Simon announced. He had decided it would be best to get to the heart of the matter. Vanessa looked up at him.   
“Ah yes, you’re Simon right?” Simon nodded. “Good, good. Please sit down, this won’t take too long.” Simon wasn’t quite sure he liked the sound of that but there was nothing he could do now. Vanessa had brought up his personnel file on her computer and was looking at it through beady eyes. “You’ve been here for five years now, am I correct?”   
“Yes,” said Simon as his knees shook.   
“How do you feel about your position here?” Simon frowned at her; he wasn’t quite sure he liked where this was heading. “It’s a simple enough question,” Vanessa prompted.   
“I don’t know,” Simon began.  
“Are you happy?”   
“Yes.”   
“Hmm.”   
“Look what is this about? I don’t mean to be rude.” Vanessa smiled again.  
“Not at all, I respect your candour.” Simon frowned again. He caught a glimpse of paperwork on her desk and not for the first time he began to wonder just how competent Vanessa Lytton actually was. “I’m sure you’ll be aware that over the past month the company has run into some financial difficulties - the price of the current economy I’m afraid but we have to be seen to be making some cuts however unfortunate they might be.” The conversation was careering directly in the direction Simon had feared it might. “Listen to me when I say this but you have been a valued member of staff.”   
“Have been?” Simon queried. Vanessa didn’t even have the decency to look slightly ashamed.   
“Yes I’m really very sorry Simon.”   
“That’s it? You’re letting me go and that’s it?” Simon couldn’t remember the last time he had felt this angry.  
“Please understand this was not a decision taken lightly.” Simon stood up from the chair abruptly.   
“Was that what you said to Peter before you chucked him out?” His insides were seething. Vanessa had stopped smiling.   
“Mr. Reakes and I both came to the decision that a quiet retirement would be the best option.” Simon laughed derisively.   
“Oh spare me. Peter gave his life to this firm. Did he ever once ask for a pay rise or anything? No, he didn’t. He just got on with his job and to the best of his ability.” Vanessa swallowed very deliberately.   
“His ability to do his job was compromised. I knew that and he as sure as hell knew that!”   
“What you mean is he didn’t fit in with your perfect picture,” Simon retorted.   
“He wanted to leave Simon,” It was clear Vanessa had made a tremendous effort to remain calm; her face was white and her eyes flashed.   
“No. He didn’t. I knew him better than you could ever hope to,” Simon was breathing heavily but he kept his eyes fixed on Vanessa.   
“There were extenuating circumstances. He couldn’t hack it, not on top of the-“ Vanessa stopped abruptly apparently realising that she had said too much.   
“On top of what?”   
“Nothing, I shouldn’t have said anything.”   
“On top of what?” Simon asked again.   
“He’s got cancer okay!” There was a stunned silence between them. Simon felt like his whole world had just been knocked askew. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to come out like that.”   
“So that’s why you got rid of him, because he’s dying.” Vanessa rubbed her eyes and stared at him. For a brief moment it looked as if she was trying to appear comforting.   
“He made the decision. I’m sorry if you don’t like it but there it is.” 

Present Day

“I’m sorry about that,” Jasmine muttered to Charlie. Making the most of Jac and Paula’s absence, Charlie squeezed her hand gently. “That wasn’t the way I wanted you to meet my family.”   
“It’s okay Jas,” Charlie told her softly. “I know what families are like.” Jasmine laughed.  
“I haven’t even seen mum for months and Jac well things are only just beginning to sort themselves out there.” Jasmine sighed and smiled at Charlie gently.   
“What exactly is the issue between them?” Jasmine rolled her eyes exasperatedly. “I don’t mean to pry but there does seem to be a lot of bad blood there.”   
“It’s a very long story,” Jasmine explained with an expression of weariness.   
“It usually is,” Charlie laughed loudly and it was so infectious that Jasmine couldn’t help laughing with her. It took them a few moments to realise they were gazing deep into each other’s eyes.   
“Kiss me,” Jasmine murmured.   
“Did I just hear you right?” Charlie murmured back at her.   
“Go on, kiss me.” They lent forwards until their lips touched together. For those few fateful seconds they felt apart from the world and nothing could come between them. The kiss lingered.   
“Well I didn’t see that one coming,” Jac’s voice drifted from the doorway. Jasmine and Charlie broke apart quickly but there was no hiding it now. Everyone had seen.   
“So you thought you’d worm yourself in here and get close to my daughter?” Jasmine had seen her mum lose her temper before but this was something new. Her lips were thin and pursed and her cheeks a chalk white.   
“That’s not what happened, I can explain,” Charlie started.  
“Oh just don’t. Just don’t.”   
“Mum!” Jasmine grabbed hold of Charlie’s hand and gripped it tightly. Paula’s eyes narrowed angrily.   
“She’s old enough to make her own decisions,” Jac said, standing up for Jasmine. Jasmine shot her a grateful smile.   
“Oh shut up Jackie. I’m tired of arguing with you.”   
“That’s a familiar pattern. Just like when you got tired of being a mother?”   
“I haven’t got time for this!” Paula knew she was losing control and it was this more than anything that scared her. “Jasmine darling, she’s just using you.”   
“And you know this how exactly?”   
“You’ve been through a terrible ordeal. You’re scared and she’s been there for you but it’s gone too far now.” Jasmine took a deep breath before she spoke.   
“Yes I have been through an ordeal and since you got here you have done nothing but row with Jac and judge Charlie. Not once have you asked me how I am or how this happened or anything. You know I used to think Jac had misjudged you but from where I’m sitting you’re every bit as twisted as she always said.” Paula felt like the wind had been knocked out of her stomach. Jac was smiling to herself, her expression satisfied.   
“But I know you Jas. Better than anyone,” Paula forced herself to be calm.   
“No, you really don’t,” replied Jasmine without looking at her.  
“You’re not-“  
“Not what?”   
“One of them. I would know,” Paula continued.   
“One of them? What century are you from?” Jac bit her lip to stop herself from laughing. Charlie just grinned every so slightly.   
“I didn’t mean, I just mean I would know if you were, you know?”   
“A lesbian,” Jasmine finished the sentence for her. “And you’re right mum, I’m not.” Paula seemed confused.  
“So why?”   
“You can’t help who you fall for.” Paula opened her mouth to speak but Jac cut across her.  
“That would be the end of the discussion,” she told her. 

7 months earlier

Simon held Peter’s hand as the monitor beeped beside them. He was so frail now, his eyes barely opened and Simon couldn’t help feeling a twinge of horror at how thin and wasted away he looked. There wasn’t much time left now; the chemo had failed and had he was now too weak to fight the disease that now riddled his insides.   
“Don’t be sad for me,” Peter said although it was a great effort to speak and his voice was quieter than a whisper.   
“It’s not fair. You didn’t deserve this.” Peter attempted to smile but the muscles in his face didn’t seem to want to work any more.   
“I’m not a saint Simon.”   
“You’re my friend,” Simon told him. “You’ll always be my friend.” Peter coughed painfully; it sounded as if his insides were being hacked up from within. Simon poured him a glass of water which he took gratefully and sipped at. He was too ill to swallow large amounts.   
“I will never forget what you’ve done for me this past month,” Peter said hoarsely. “You didn’t have to.”   
“Yes, I did. You would have done the same for me,” Peter said nothing. He clenched his eyes and put his hand to his head. “Do you want me to call someone?”  
“I’m fine. A momentary pain nothing more.”   
“Are you sure?”  
“There’s nothing they can do for me now anyway.” Simon looked away from him.  
“I know,” he said darkly. “They’ve tried everything.”   
“It’s a nasty bugger this cancer,” Peter joked with another bout of dry coughing. “I could swear it didn’t play by the rules.”   
“Bit of a cheat yeah,” Simon said and attempted to laugh because he knew Peter would not want him to sit there miserably.   
“Simon,” Peter began but he was overcome by coughing again and although they did not yet realise it, his blood pressure was starting to plummet.   
“Don’t try to speak, you need to rest,” Simon instructed him. Peter shook his head.  
“I need you to listen. Please.” Simon nodded.   
“My wife. Call her.” Simon felt a pang of guilt run through him although he had nothing to feel guilty for.   
“Peter, Fiona died remember?” Simon watched his friend carefully before continuing. “She had that operation remember and she never woke up again, do you remember?” Peter let go of Simon’s hand and turned away from him.   
“Oh.” For Simon this was the most terrible thing he had ever heard in his life. It was worse than the frailty, worse than his coughing. It was the sound of a man who had given up. A man who had nothing left to live for. “Do you have any regrets Simon?” Peter asked him suddenly.   
“A few,” Simon replied thoughtfully. “But don’t we all?” Peter coughed again; it was worsening rapidly.   
“I regret never having kids,” Peter considered. “I think that after all of this I would have enjoyed fatherhood.” Simon cast his mind back to his daughter and then he stared at the dying man lying before him. There was a sadness in Peter’s eyes, a sadness that could never be cured. “It’s funny-“ Peter’s voice trailed off and his eyelids drooped shut.   
“Peter?” The monitor had flatlined and Simon could hear it ringing in his ears. He yelled for help but by the time anyone had come, he knew it was too late. He watched, detached from it all, as the consultant switched off the monitor and disconnected the tubes. His friend was still lying there but he wasn’t Peter, not any more. 

Present Day 

“Can you hear me?” Simon thought he could hear voices but he was sure he must be dreaming. “Sir can you open your eyes?” The voices were becoming clearer and more focussed. Simon shuddered and began to open his eyes gingerly. “Sir can you tell me your name?” The voice belonged to a paramedic who was bent over him, checking him for signs of injury.   
“Simon, Simon Burrows.”   
“Right then Simon, can you tell me what happened?” Simon felt a sudden twinge of earsplitting pain in his liver and for a moment he looked as if he was about ready to collapse again.   
“I don’t know, I think I collapsed. I’m not sure.”   
“How long have you been out here?”   
“I don’t know.”   
“We’re going to take you to Holby City okay?” Simon shook his head.   
“No, I’ve got to get going,” he pleaded.  
“You have to go to hospital. You’re really very sick Simon.” Simon shook his head again.  
“I’m fine. I’ll be fine.” The paramedics were having none of it as they helped lift Simon on to a spinal board.   
“Just let us take you for a checkup Simon, it’s better to be safe than sorry isn’t it?” Simon thought about it for a moment and then nodded.  
“I suppose.”   
“That’s the spirit.” The paramedics carried him to the ambulance which Simon could now see was parked at the edge of the field. “We couldn’t risk getting stuck in the mud,” they explained. 

The ambulance drove off in silence, heading down country lanes and trying its best to avoid the traffic of the city as much as possible. It was half an hour away from the hospital but there was no need to rush just yet. Simon’s condition was stable as he laughed and joked with the paramedic in the back. Another sudden twinge struck him.  
“Are you okay?” Simon didn’t answer. The pain seemed to linger unlike before and as each second went by it intensified. “Simon?” Simon started to fit, saliva drooled out of the sides of his mouth mingled with blood. “He’s fitting!” The paramedic called out to his partner who responded by putting his foot down on the accelerator. The ambulance began to speed up but there was no sign of the fitting subsiding. “How long to Holby?”  
“About 20 minutes.”  
“That’s too long.” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	18. PART EIGHTEEN

PART EIGHTEEN

Detective Inspector Angela Bryce looked up from the interview table and stared into the cold, unfeeling eyes of Simon Burrows. His features were grey, lined and it was clear that he was severely ill. There was a tinge of yellow in his eyes and on his skin and as the interview tape whirred in the background, Simon gave a dry hacking cough. Beside Simon there sat a short, squat little man with an upturned nose and a deeply furrowed brow. Resting on the edge of his nose were a pair of superglued spectacles with smudged fingermarks across the lenses. He wore a dark grey tweed jacket with elbow patches that gave him the impression of an old geography teacher.   
“Now look here,” he said in a slightly twee voice. “Do you have any evidence whatsoever that my client is responsible for these outlandish claims?” Simon lent back in his chair and folded his arms with a hint of satisfaction.   
“We have a statement from the victim-“  
“Did anyone witness the alleged assault?” The squat man interrupted abruptly.   
“There were no witnesses,” Bryce admitted with a weary sigh that seemed to sink her deep blue eyes.   
“No witnesses.” He looked incredibly pleased with himself as he repeated those words back at Bryce. “So it’s just her word against his.”   
“Yes,” Bryce was beginning to feel more than a little agitated. It rankled with her that this irritating man might actually beat her. He was certainly not going to let her get her way with this one. Bryce turned her gaze on Simon again but as with before he just stared back at her. There was no blinking. She had no doubt of his guilt in her mind.   
“Interesting,” the squat man’s top lip curled into a slight smile as he spoke. Bryce frowned.  
“What’s interesting?” She felt sure she wouldn’t like the answer.   
“Interesting that we’re sat in this interview room at all when you have no evidence to back up these accusations,” Simon smirked at this but within seconds he had returned to his unflinching self. The squat man cleared his throat and tapped his knuckles on the cold hard edge of the table. “Either you produce some real evidence or my client walks.” Bryce bit her bottom lip uncomfortably; they had no evidence other than the word of Jasmine Burrows and as she thought back to her initial meeting with the victim, she realised that if this ever went to trial, the poor girl would be torn apart.   
“Interview terminated at 16:48,” Bryce said with clear reluctance as she clicked stop on the tape recorder. She turned to Simon: “You’re free to go.”   
“Thank you,” Simon wheezed and stood up from the table. His lawyer was already waiting at the door, holding it open for him to walk through. Simon walked over to the door but stopped suddenly and turned back to gaze at Bryce. The Detective Inspector was busy shuffling her papers and didn’t notice until she felt his stare burning on to her neck.   
“Can I help you?” Bryce asked coldly. Simon smiled back at her before he answered.  
“I hope you catch the bastard,” Bryce knew he was goading her but she couldn’t help feeling an urge to beat him to within an inch of his miserable little life. The way he stood there, his arms folded with an air of smugness and that stupid sneer on his face; it was enough to make anyone want to hit him, Bryce thought and immediately berated herself because she had been taught to repress such petty emotions.   
“Mr. Burrows-“  
“Please, call me Simon,” Simon interrupted her with a broad smile that was somehow worse than the sneer he had worn throughout the interview. Bryce swallowed; she felt the lump in her throat pass down into her stomach but it was a few seconds before she had regained her full composure.   
“Mr. Burrows,” she began again; her voice focussed and determined. “Your daughter was brutally attacked and assaulted against her will. Surely you want the person responsible to be caught?” Simon’s smile turned into an unnerving smirk before he answered, choosing his words very carefully.   
“I hope that your detective skills will be enough to catch whomever was responsible. After all, I’m sure we in Holby all feel particularly reassured to know that Detective Bryce is on the case. There hasn’t been a case you’ve yet to crack. Or so I’m told. Now that I’ve spent a couple of hours in your delightful presence, I must admit, that I am a little disappointed.”   
“Disappointed?” Bryce queried; her manner was slightly flustered and she noticed the self-congratulatory look in his eyes as the question escaped her lips. He had got under her skin and she didn’t like it; she felt repulsed.   
“I was led to believe you were one of our best and brightest. Now I’m faced with the reality, I see it was merely overhyped propaganda,” Simon said, his voice cold and calculating. The lawyer motioned for him to walk away but Simon shook his head and the squat man fell silent, his heavy rasping breaths echoing along the corridor.   
“I’m not scared by you Mr. Burrows,” Bryce started in her most assertive manner but Simon answered her with just another ice-cold stare. “I have taken on much stronger men than you.” She continued: “You’re just a cockroach, a cockroach which must be stepped on by the heel of my boot. Believe me when I tell you this, you may think you’ve got away with it as you stand there all smug and self-centred but I know you did it Mr. Burrows. I know you did it.” Her chest was heaving furiously as she finished speaking and to her dismay, Simon was laughing.   
“It’s just a pity that doesn’t quite stand up in court isn’t it?” Simon said with a grim snigger. “Thank you for your time Inspector. It’s been really rather entertaining.” Simon closed the door behind him; Bryce could hear his footsteps echo until they faded out of earshot and he was gone.   
“Damn that man!” Bryce smacked the table with her right hand so hard that the tape recorder rocked. She winced as a spasm of pain ran through her now stinging hand. 

A fortnight had passed by with Paula and Jasmine staying in the spare bedroom of their cottage; and Jac Naylor had begun to feel claustrophobic at having them all there. In that fortnight Hollie had grown bigger still; and yet Jac was none the wiser to her time in hospital for Jonny had kept to his decision and hidden it from her. Although Jonny and Mo had kept up a pretence, there was still an air of uncomfortableness between them whenever she had come to visit; and Jac noticed how Jonny had barely spoken of her in the recent weeks however she chose not to broach the subject with him. It was her mother who was really weighing down on her mind. Jac had agreed, reluctantly, to allow Paula to stay for a few days whilst Jasmine’s wounds healed and had had time to recuperate. Those initial few days had turned into a week and then a fortnight and Paula had made no indication of leaving any time soon. The relationship between Jac and her mother remained as frostbitten as ever; and it was often left up to either Jonny or Jasmine to pull the two sparring women apart.   
That morning as the sun dawned over the east side of the house, its rays penetrating through the tiny cracks in the window panes of the kitchen; Jasmine stood alone by the sink feeling the warmth of the light over her face. It was still early and no one else had yet risen; Jasmine was often the first up these days ever since she had been discharged from the hospital. She said it made her feel safe or perhaps at peace more than at any other time of day. On closer inspection it became clear that Jasmine was not entirely alone on this particular morning; she muttered quietly into her phone which she balanced between her ear and shoulder as she washed the dishes from the previous night.   
“She’s been so good to me,” Jasmine said softly whilst her left hand rinsed a fork under the cold tap.   
“Well she is your sister,” Charlie’s voice crackled through and Jasmine had to laugh at the frankness of her manner.   
“True,” Jasmine replied, stifling a laugh. “It can’t have been easy though,” she considered, washing a considerably dirty knife in the lukewarm water. “Mum’s just as difficult as ever and I know Jac’s growing tired of her.” Charlie, who in her brief meeting with Paula had formed a not so fond opinion of her, barely concealed her tutting.   
“Paula was thoroughly charming,” she said with a faux upper class lilt to her voice. Jasmine sniggered.   
“Stop it,” she giggled and for a brief moment she thought she could hear movement coming from upstairs. Once she was satisfied she was safe, Jasmine continued: “I think I should try to do something for her. You know?”   
“For Jac?” Charlie asked.  
“Yeah,” Jasmine replied with a deep sigh. “I was thinking maybe I could do a meal for her and Jonny. Sort of show my appreciation, what do you reckon?” Charlie cleared her throat.   
“That’s a pretty good idea yeah,” Charlie answered after a moment’s thought. “What are you thinking of cooking?” Jasmine moved away from the sink and began searching through the cupboards.   
“I could maybe rustle up a few slices of gammon, a couple vegetables and a side dip,” Jasmine muttered; her concentration falling on the array of herbs and spices accumulated on the top shelf.   
“Do you have any of that?” There was a brief pause.  
“No,” Jasmine said at last. “I’ve got some herbs,” she added as an afterthought. Charlie laughed again at this, so loud that Jasmine had to hold the phone away from her ear. “Shush,” she murmured but this only served to make Charlie laugh again.   
“You’re gonna need to go shopping then,” Charlie said breathlessly once her hysterics had all but worn off. Jasmine fell silent; since coming home from the hospital she had only left the house for a couple of follow up appointments and she wasn’t quite sure if she was ready just yet. Charlie could sense her apprehension and once she had collected herself, decided to reassure Jasmine as best she could. “Listen Jas, you don’t have to get the ingredients,” Charlie told her, “just give me the list and I’ll go get them for you,” she finished. Jasmine considered this; her mind was racing and the thought of going outside made her feel physically ill.   
“No,” Jasmine said carefully. She wasn’t altogether sure why she had said it. “I mean, I think I should give it a go.”   
“Only if you’re sure?” Charlie asked, her voice full of concern. Jasmine nodded and then suddenly remembered that as she was talking on the phone, Charlie could not see her.   
“Do you think you could come with me?” Jasmine asked in a low shaking whisper.   
“Of course,” Charlie told her. “Anything you want.” Jasmine wiped away a bit of moisture from her eyes.   
“Thanks, I just don’t think I’m ready to go on my own,” Jasmine explained, clenching her knuckles around the cupboard door handle.   
“That’s perfectly understandable,” reassured Charlie; it struck Jasmine at that moment just how lucky she was to have both Charlie and Jac looking after her. “Do you want me to pick you up?”   
“If that’s not gonna cause you too much trouble?”   
“It’s no trouble honestly Jas. Would 2 o’clock suit?” Jasmine looked up at the clock hanging on the opposite wall.   
“Any chance we could go a little earlier? It’s just I want to make sure I’ve got plenty of time to prepare.”   
“Around lunchtime suit you?”   
“Yeah I think so,” said Jasmine almost cheerfully. “Okay I’d better get going. See you later.”   
“Look forwards to it,” Charlie said and hung up.   
“Who was that?” Jasmine turned around to see Jac standing in the doorway, her mouth agape as she attempted to stifle a heavy yawn. 

“You know what you did,” Jonny said through gritted teeth and his eyes flashed an anger that Mo had not seen in them before. They were narrowed almost to the point of squinting. Mo gulped; this had been going on ever since her revelation and there were only so many times she could apologise before she gave up trying to appease him. It wasn’t just Mo; others in the hospital had noticed his abrupt change in appearance and manner. Some, like Zosia, had merely learnt to cope with it and had little to say; Professor Hope, on the other hand, had begun to grow tired of Jonny’s quick temper and snapping remarks.   
“This can’t continue Maconie,” Mo hissed back at him; she checked over her shoulder quickly to make sure that Elliot wasn’t keeping a watchful eye behind them. Jonny flicked through a folder marked Mr. Tony Harris; he did not look at Mo or give any indication that he had heard her. Exasperated, Mo let out a tiny grunt but still Jonny would not acknowledge her. This was what their once solid friendship had become and as the days went by, it seemed to Mo as if there would soon be no going back to how things had been in the days before.   
“Professor Hope wants to see us,” snarled Jonny as he walked by, dropping the folder on to the station without taking care to see where it landed. Mo wheeled around on her chair:  
“When?” Mo asked with her voice full of anxiety.   
“Now,” Jonny replied in a monotone. Mo looked around; there was no sign of Elliot anywhere and in any case, Jonny had been at the station with her for the past ten minutes. She frowned.   
“I don’t remember Elliot coming round,” she began uncertainly.   
“He told me earlier,” Jonny cut across in his abrupt manner. By now, Mo had got to her feet and was flapping around the station in a desperate attempt to look somewhat presentable; there were ink stains on her shirt where the pens in her pocket had leaked.   
“What’s it about?” Jonny scowled at Mo and then he cleared his throat:  
“He didn’t tell me,” which was perfectly true, Jonny thought; Elliot hadn’t told him the reason for the summoning just that he had to be there. They both knew however; everyone knew. 

Simon staggered through the warm cobbles of the high street; he squinted at the lights emanating from the dozens of shops and cafés that were littered around. His hair was matted, as he had not washed in days; and he had begun to grow a grey, scraggy beard around his chin. It did nothing to enhance his appearance. Each step was painful for him and he landed heavily on every foot. Simon could tell from the corners of his eyes that people were watching, staring, even pointing at him when they thought he couldn’t see. It did not trouble him; they were of no consequence to his mind. People always stared at what they perceived to be either new or different; in that way they have not evolved.   
He stopped, suddenly, and turned; Simon watched through watery eyes and waited. After a few minutes, he shook his head and continued walking. He thought he had seen, but no, it had just been a trick of the light. Simon wasn’t sure what he would have said anyway; the time for words had long since passed. 

“What is going on with you two?” Elliot demanded in his most primary-school teacher voice. Jonny and Mo immediately felt as if they had been placed in the old ‘naughty’ chairs and it took them a few seconds to realise that they were both staring at the floor in much the same way that a guilty child would.   
“Ask Mo,” Jonny replied; there was a glint of defiance to him that slightly unnerved Elliot. He knew in that instance that he would be hard pressed to get Jonny to open up.   
“I’m asking both of you,” Elliot answered and the normally jovial professor was not in the mood for mind games. Mo, who up until this point had said nothing, got to her feet. “Are you leaving us Ms. Effanga?”   
“No,” Mo replied as she stopped in her tracks. “Of course not.”   
“Glad to hear it,” Elliot told her. “Neither of you are leaving until we sort this mess out.”   
“She nearly killed my daughter,” Jonny said dangerously. Both Elliot and Mo turned to look at him; Elliot’s mouth hung open in shock but Mo could feel the anger bubbling inside of her. The injustice of his remarks rankling in their aftermath.   
“I am sure that whatever Mo did, it was in the best interests of Hollie’s wellbeing,” Elliot said, attempting to reason with the furious Scotsman that stood before him.   
“Yes, because letting a 7-month old baby have access to peanuts is brilliant care,” Jonny retorted and they could hear the cracks in his voice; Mo refused to let herself feel guilty all over again. Elliot’s brow furrowed as the cogs in his mind began to whir.   
“I didn’t know she’d got hold of one, I thought I’d cleared them all up,” Mo insisted but Jonny refused to accept her version of events. Elliot looked from one to the other; it was clear that neither would back down. One thing was certain however, their bickering would have to cease and if they couldn’t work with each other, then other arrangements would have to be made.   
“She was in your care,” Jonny insisted. “I trusted you.”   
“I did the best I could Jonny, I never imagined for a minute that-“  
“That what?” Jonny interrupted, but before Mo could say anything, Elliot cleared his throat loudly. The glaring look in his eyes indicated that he had had enough.   
“Right this ends here, now.” Jonny opened his mouth to protest further: “This argument does not leave my office, do I make myself clear?” Mo nodded but Jonny still looked as if he would rather continue the disagreement. Elliot scratched the back of his head, watching Jonny closely.   
“Listen Jonny, mate,” Mo began cautiously. Jonny tilted his head to look at her. “I don’t want us to fight, it’s killin’ me because, because I miss you.” Mo thought for a brief moment that she could see a bit of the old softening behind his eyes but then he blinked and the fury had returned.   
“There’s no going back,” Jonny said, breaking through the uncomfortable silence that followed Mo’s words. He took a deep breath and they saw the anger melt away from his eyes. “I just can’t trust you Mo, I’m sorry.” His voice cracked again but it was not in fury this time and somehow it made Mo feel worse than his anger had. “Can I go?” Elliot didn’t answer. “It’s just I’ve got a patient in urgent need of obs.” Elliot nodded and Jonny, whose hand had already clenched around the door handle, pulled it open.   
“Oh Jonny!” Elliot called him back; Jonny stopped mid-track and stared back at the ageing professor.   
“Elliot?” Elliot was squinting at him through the rim of his glasses. Jonny turned his gaze to Mo who shrugged and said nothing.   
“Does Jac know?” Jonny shook his head. “Thank you Jonny.” For a second, Jonny just stood there in bewilderment but his composure quickly returned and he strode back onto the ward. Elliot, meanwhile, had turned his attention back to Mo. “Is there anything you want to tell me?” Mo took a step back and shook her head.   
“Nothing,” she clarified. Elliot smiled; the old twinkle returning to his eyes.   
“You don’t have to work with him if it’s too much,” Elliot informed her. “The rotas can be twigged.” Mo thought about this; it would be easier if Jonny wasn’t snarling down her neck but she would also have no chance of making amends and in spite of everything, Mo was still determined to rescue their friendship.  
“It’s okay Professor Hope, I can manage.” Elliot shot her another quizzical look:  
“If you’re sure?”   
“Doubly,” Mo replied. “It’s a laugh,” she continued although not entirely convincing. “I’d better get back too,” She said almost as an afterthought. Elliot nodded in agreement; he waved her out of his office and when he was satisfied that she was out of eyeshot, he took out his phone and began to scroll through the contacts. He stopped for a second as his finger hovered over Jac Naylor. 

Jasmine’s chest was heaving up and down and her breaths became increasingly erratic; her hands were clutching a collection of shopping bags and Charlie held the rest of them. They were stood in the centre of the high street; the afternoon sun beaming down on the gleaming cobbles.   
“What is it Jas, what’ wrong?” asked Charlie anxiously; she shifted the bags and placed her now free hand around Jasmine’s upper right arm in comfort.   
“He was here,” Jasmine whispered; her legs had begun to shake. Charlie glanced around the high street but there was no sign of him; people were staring at them as they passed by but Charlie’s concern was firmly placed on Jasmine.   
“He’s not here now Jas,” Charlie conceded. “A good thing too, or else I’d have punched his bloody lights out.” Jasmine feigned a weak smile.   
“Can you drop me home now?” Charlie nodded.   
As they got into the car, Jasmine sighed deeply and looked as if she might say something.   
“Still on your mind?” Charlie prompted her. Jasmine shook her head initially but then something crossed her thoughts.  
“You don’t think he was looking for me do you?” Charlie had already considered this possibility but had decided not to let Jasmine know.   
“He’d be insane to try,” she told her; Jasmine shrugged but the attempt to reassure her did not pass by unnoticed. 

The first thing Jonny saw was Jac’s phone lying on the kitchen table. He turned his head and spotted his fiancée standing in the far corner; her face was almost in shadow but Jonny could just about make out the stern expression etched across it. He walked around the table to her and put his arms around her shoulder but she shook him off. Alarm bells were sounding in Jonny’s head.  
“Jac?” He asked tentatively. Jac continued to watch him; her arms were now folded and her eyes had narrowed. Jonny looked all around the kitchen; there was no one else in the else save for Paula and Hollie who were probably asleep upstairs. “Jac what’s going on?” Jonny looked almost desperate as he pleaded for an answer.   
“Why don’t you ask Mo,” Jac said at last; her expression was bitter and her words had been forced through thin, white lips.   
“What does Mo have to do with this?” Jonny replied but in the same second, he wished he hadn’t.   
“You tell me,” retorted Jac. Jonny’s mind was in overdrive; he felt sure he knew what Jac was referring to but a modicum of self-doubt still hung over him. “You, tell me why I have just had Elliot on the phone asking if Hollie was all right?” Jac glared at him; there was anger in every word she spoke but at the same time, her eyes betrayed her vulnerability.   
“Elliot,” Jonny repeated back at her; the penny had dropped. “He told you.”   
“Told me what?” Jac asked quietly. “That my daughter was seriously ill and you didn’t even think to tell me?” Jonny opened his mouth to speak and then closed it again; he looked from Jac to the phone and back to Jac again. Jac took a heavy breath and swallowed. “She could have died Jonny. Did you even think about that?” Jonny could feel Jac’s eyes burning into his but his throat was dry and he had nothing to say. “Do I mean that little to you?”   
“No-“ Jonny interjected but Jac cut through him:  
“Do I mean so little to you, that you would hide this from me?” Jac’s rage had contorted her face; Jonny took a step towards her, his heart thumping so loudly in his chest that Jac could hear each beat.   
“Jac,” Jonny reached out to hold her hand but she pushed him away:  
“Don’t touch me,” Jac commanded in a quiet voice. Jonny fell back, his face crestfallen. Jac raised her hand and looked at the shining engagement ring on her finger. There was silence between them as she slowly twisted the ring off her finger and placed it on the sideboard behind her. The ring clattered like a discarded coin; Jonny watched it, waiting for it to settle and be still. The silence continued; an uncomfortable, tense silence. Jonny bit his lip but every time he tried to speak, no words would form. Instead, he could feel water building up behind his eyes as Jac looked back at him; her eyes were empty as though there was no emotion left inside. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	19. Chapter Nineteen (Christmas Special, Part One)

PART NINETEEN - THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL EDITION

The rain had fallen with a sickening splat on to Jonny’s right eye and he woke with a start. The stubble around his chin glistened with the wetness of the morning dew and it was a few moments before he realised just how cold he felt. His lips were red raw and his teeth chattered but it was still dark and there wasn’t a soul around to give him warmth. The bench had seemed a good idea to him at the time but after spending a restless night tossing and turning (he had fallen onto the pavement several times) it had almost certainly lost its appeal. Jonny yawned and rolled over; he knew immediately that it had been a mistake. With a cry of shock and pain, Jonny hit the ground, his left elbow striking the hard pavement and grazing the skin so that it bled.   
“Dammit,” he muttered as he picked himself back up. The fall had woken him up properly now and there was nothing for it but to get on with the day. What day? The words crossed Jonny’s mind and his heart sank like a stone. He had no family, no job and no home. The last few months had been some of the hardest of his life; he didn’t even have access to Hollie any more. His lips curled angrily as he remembered how it had been before, how it should still have been. It was Hollie’s first Christmas tomorrow and Jonny didn’t know when he would ever see her again. The thought filled his heart with a heavy darkness and he felt his shoulders stoop forward. It was just at that moment that a shadow seemed to catch his eye. It lingered on the peripheral of his vision for a few seconds until he blinked and it was gone. Jonny felt a little uneasy but there was no use dwelling on it. It would be better just to walk to the High Street and see if he could scrape together enough change to buy a cup of coffee. He almost (but not quite) missed the taste of Holby City General’s instant coffee. Things weren't quite that bad yet.   
The sun had now risen as high as it was obviously going to and Jonny dragged his cold and wet feet in the direction of the High Street. There were no birds in the sky and the only signs of life were the hurried footsteps of bedraggled strangers desperately searching for that tricky last Christmas present. Jonny wondered how many of them had noticed him as they brushed past without so much as a pardon or an excuse me. Not that it mattered, he was hardly important and they had their own lives to think about. Even so, he couldn’t help feeling slightly aggrieved when the edge of an umbrella came whizzing past him and narrowly avoided his eye. The woman carrying it made a face as though it had been his fault for standing there. Jonny blinked. The same shadow had passed over him again and he looked quickly in the direction it had come from. Jonny saw nothing but a man leaning against the wall of an alley. 

Jac opened the car door and laid the shopping bags across the backseat. She sighed and shut the door with a sharp bang. A dark shadow passed over her and she turned around but the car park was deserted. The shadow still lingered however and Jac’s hands grasped the car door tightly. There was a man watching her from the other side. Jac wondered why she hadn’t noticed him before. She didn't know why but he made her feel safe and she felt her legs walking slowly towards him as though as she had been beckoned.   
Bright light filled Jac’s eyes and she blinked rapidly to regain her composure. The room was filed with a brilliant white light and the whir of ancient machinery hung in the air. A hexagonal desk seemed to take up much of the centre. The walls seemed to be made up of small white roundels but Jac had no idea what they were for.   
“Where am I?” Jac mouthed.   
“Welcome to my time machine,” the man replied. He appeared to be busying himself with a selection of levels and buttons on the hexagonal desk. The room lurched suddenly and Jac instinctively grabbed hold of the railing to stop herself toppling over at his feet. Evidently everything had gone to plan as the man was clapping his hands delightedly. A column at the centre of the desk was rising up and down with a wheezing groaning sound emitting from it.   
“Pull the other one,” Jac replied. She couldn’t understand why he expected her to believe that he possessed a working time machine. Such a device was of course impossible in this day and age. The smile faded from the man’s jovial face and he looked for a moment as though all his Christmasses had been cancelled.   
“No, no this really is a time machine. I had a name for it but I can’t for the life of me recall what it was. My memory isn’t what it used to be, you know?” Jac snorted.  
“You look about twelve,” she said derisively.   
“I’m quite a bit older than I look,” the man replied and did a little jig around the desk. Jac raised her eyebrow at him to indicate she wasn’t impressed by his antics.   
“Who are you?” Jac asked although she did not expect she would get a sensible answer. The man, after all, was clearly an idiot. His face fell and lines appeared etched into his forehead giving him an age that should be beyond his years.   
“I don’t know,” he said quietly. “I thought I knew but I’ve been travelling for so many years now, the knowledge is lost to me. I just come when I’m called.” Jac eyed him curiously. All logic was telling her to run, to get away but her legs stayed rooted to the spot.   
“I didn’t call you,” she murmured. The man stared directly into her eyes.  
“Yes you did.” He cracked his neck. “A long time ago.” Jac frowned.  
“If this is a time machine, which it’s not, where are you taking me?” The man’s face lit up and he smiled broadly.   
“To the past and then back to the future,” he replied enigmatically. “But not just you.” Jac stared blankly.   
“Jac?” She blinked. She knew that voice, the Scottish drawl, a voice that could tear her heart apart in seconds and then sow it back up and rip it all over again. He couldn’t be here, that was just absurd. She turned around slowly expecting it to be some kind of cruel joke and she would see nothing but empty air. She kept her eyes firmly shut. “It is you,” the voice continued but Jac still did not open her eyes. “You have to open them Jac.” Jac began to lift her eyelids very very slowly until a blur of shapes and light soared into her pupils. Her heart began to thump; it was him.  
“What are you doing here?”  
“I could ask you the same question,” Jonny replied. 

The room shuddered and shook as the mysterious machine appeared to make a landing. Jac hung on to the railing whilst Jonny grabbed a pillar that resembled one of the ones from Ancient Greece. This was not a fact that particularly bothered Jonny at that moment. The man stroked his white sideburns thoughtfully and winked at them.   
“Well, we’ve arrived,” he said. He looked from Jac to Jonny waiting to see which of them would react first.   
“I’ll open those doors and we’ll still be in that bloody car park,” Jac said and tutted loudly with her arms folded across her chest. Jonny looked at her, confused.   
“He picked up me in the High Street…” They both stared at the stranger in front of them.   
“You’re not in the car park,” he said to Jac, “and you’re not in the High Street,” he continued to Jonny. “Not any more.You have journeyed through time to a point in both of your futures.”   
“Did you smack your head when you were a child?” Jac’s cheekbones were white and she had had just about as much as she could stand of being trapped in a room with these two snivelling specimens of the male species. Jonny bit his lip gingerly; it was clear Jac had still not forgiven him. “Stop messing around and let us out-“ Jac stopped mid sentence and looked all around for the stranger had suddenly disappeared from view.   
“Just take a look outside, go on,” Jac’s eyes followed the direction of his voice and found him leaning casually against the wooden frame of the doors. He was grinning like a buffoon and waiting for her to follow. Jac blinked; her feet were already walking towards him.   
“Jac, what are you-“ Jonny broke off; his feet were moving too. They were both converging on the stranger who stood watching them with an evident gleam of satisfaction etched into his eyes.   
“Come on, this is important,” the stranger murmured softly. “For both your sakes and for your daughter’s.” At this last comment both Jac and Jonny quickened their pace. They strode forcefully to the door and pushed on it but it did not budge. Jac rolled her eyes; the stranger clicked his fingers and the door swung open. A bitterly cold wind swept into the room and they were almost knocked off their feet by the sheer force of the sudden gust.   
“What’s going on? Where are we?” Jac and Jonny both asked in unison.   
“Just look,” the stranger said by way of reply. They looked. The sight that greeted them was familiar and yet tinged with an unfamiliarity that they could not grasp. Jac wondered where the gust of wind had come from for they were gazing into the dining room of a small cottage; a roaring log fire crackled in the background and there were two people seated around the table. Jac recognised herself immediately although the Jacqueline Naylor she saw through her eyes was older, a good twenty years or more. The hair, although still ginger was frayed and noticeably grey in places and there were dark purple bags under her eyes. It didn’t take much to guess who the young woman sitting beside her was; Hollie all grown up and with short spiked red hair, a nose ring and studs in her ears. She wore a low-cut dress and, just visible on her left shoulder Jac and Jonny could make out a tiny symbol tattooed onto the skin although they did not know what it meant.   
“What’s happened to her?” Jonny asked, his mouth agape and his eyes wide with shock. “Where am I?” The stranger said nothing but beckoned them to keep on watching. 

“What do you want mum?” the adult Hollie said gruffly. Her manner was slack and her eyes seemed permanently rolled into her skull. “I’ve gotta meet Milly and the girls in five, this’d better not take long okay?” The elderly Jac sighed unhappily; it was a strange sight to see, Jac Naylor without any fight left in her frail body.   
“I wish you wouldn’t spend time with those girls, they’re not good for you,” Jac said as she tried to reason with her tearaway daughter. Hollie scowled at her.  
“You just don’t like them because I actually have some fun when I’m with them.”   
“I know it was that Milly who convinced you to get that dreadful mark on your shoulder, I mean what is it supposed to represent?” Hollie groaned.  
“Does this have a point or can I go?” She muttered, ignoring the question her mother had posed.   
“You’ve forgotten what day it is, haven’t you?”   
“It’s Tuesday,” Hollie replied sarcastically. It was Jac’s turn to groan. She picked up the yellowed paper in front of her and slid it across the table at Hollie. Hollie frowned and glanced at the front page. There was a stony silence between them. “Tuesday 27th December 2033,” Hollie read out. Her eyes flicked down the page. “Clinical Nurse Manager shot dead at Holby City Hospital.” There were tears forming in Jac’s eyes but Hollie was too wrapped up in herself to notice them. She continued reading: “Jonny Maconie, 51, was yesterday shot and killed by an unnamed intruder as they attempted to make off with a sizeable quantity of pharmaceutical medicines from the Hospital’s own supplies. Mr. Maconie is said to have apprehended the intruder-“ Hollie stopped reading. Her voice had grown fainter as her eyes had flicked further down the page.   
“A year today,” Jac replied, her voice soft and expressionless.

Jac and Jonny both watched with horror etched into their hearts as the scene before them seemed to dissolve.   
“What was that?” Jonny demanded. “What the hell was that?” The stranger looked at them and with a grave voice, he said:  
“That, is your future.”   
“That can’t be our future!” Jac cried out. “That’s absurd! Jonny isn’t going to get killed like that and our daughter is not going to turn into whoever that girl was!” The stranger fixed his gaze upon her.   
“You do not yet understand. That is your future should you continue to walk the path you now tread.” He clicked his fingers and the wheezing groaning sound filled the air again; the time machine was moving, where it would take them, they did not know. The room lurched violently and they were thrown to the floor, Jac picked herself back up but her eyes were swimming and her head felt slightly dazed. She coughed; Jonny was spluttering and the stranger appeared to be leaping around the desk frantically as blue smoke billowed from it, smelling oddly like rotten eggs wrapped in sour skittles.   
“What is that stench?” Jonny cried out, wrinkling his nose in disgust as the room lurched sideways again. He managed to hold onto the railing before his feet slid from underneath him. “What are you doing?” he yelled at the stranger.   
“I’m afraid we might have gone a little off course!” The stranger yelled back at him.   
“What’s happening?” Jac shouted.   
“We’re crashing!” The gleeful clap of the hands and joyous expression was not the reaction either of them had expected from him.   
“You’re a lunatic,” Jonny muttered in disbelief. The stranger winked at him.  
“Isn’t it exciting? I have no idea where we’re going to end up!”   
“We want go home,” Jac said in defiance. “You have no right to just kidnap us and tell us our lives are going to crash and burn-“ But the rest of Jac’s protests were drowned out as the ship came to a loud and crunching halt.   
“I do believe we’ve landed,” the stranger said with glee. He glanced at an antique TV screen on the desk. “Still upright too. Not bad if I do say so myself, I’m getting rather good at this.” Jac slammed her hand on the railing so hard that the sound reverberated around the room and echoed off into the distance down a shadowy corridor.   
“Enough! Take us back home, now!”   
“Ah.”  
“What do you mean, ah?” Jac asked furiously.   
“I’m not sure I can,” the stranger said and he was glancing at his feet. He seemed to shrink beneath Jac’s quivering gaze until he was 8 years old again.   
“We might as well take a look outside,” Jonny suggested. Jac rolled her eyes but she could see no other alternative. 

The doors swung open but this time a wave of heat washed over them. It was beyond anything they had expected. The world in front of them was wreathed in flame and everything seemed charcoal black as far as the eye could see. A once mighty city lay in ruins on the edge of the horizon. No one would ever walk its stone paths again.   
“What happened here?” Jac asked, her expression aghast as she looked upon the devastation.   
“Thousands must have died-“ Jonny began but he did not get to finish his sentence as a sudden lurch from the time machine sent him cascading out of the doors and tumbling down the dead hill before them. Jac had just managed to grab onto the frame to stop herself falling as well but she screamed out in horror, watching Jonny fall further down the hill until he was out of sight. Jac made to follow him but the stranger held her back.   
“We have to go after him!” Jac yelled.  
“We can’t interact with this place, you are not meant to be here. This is not your world!”   
“I don’t care! I can’t leave him here!” The stranger was still holding onto her as she tried to wrench herself free.   
“I’m sorry but there’s nothing you can do! He’s gone.” Jac continued to struggle but his grip was tight.  
“He is not going to die in this foul place,” Jac murmured determinedly and with every ounce of her strength she pulled herself free from his grasp and sprinted out the doorway. The strangers calls fell on deaf ears as Jac Naylor ran as fast as her legs could carry her. She didn’t know why she did it, she just knew that she had to do something. They couldn’t just leave him here, whether he was dead or alive, it wasn’t right. A sickening roar, almost like a high-pitched wailing shriek filled the air and Jac could feel the dread building up in her heart. She skidded to a halt and looked all around, there was no sign of Jonny anywhere. The roar sounded again and this time it was closer. A droplet of blood struck her and began to roll down her cheek. In terror, Jac looked up at the sky and saw the dark red beast circling the skies above her. It was a dragon. The wings flapped mercilessly and it was a few moments before Jac realised the beast was heading straight towards her, its jaws wide and snarling. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	20. Chapter Twenty (Christmas Special, Part Two)

PART TWENTY

The beast circled overhead gnashing its teeth and baring its dark grey claws at Jac. Its blood red wings, lined with silver veins, beat through the air and gained momentum as the creature swooped over the clouds and caught the edge of the wind. Far below on the surface, Jac Naylor crouched behind a leafless tree, crooked and white. She covered her face with her hands but her whole body was trembling. Each swoop made by the dragon seemed to bring it ever closer; one more circle and it would be close enough to smell her. Her heart was racing and her head so full of questions she hardly knew how to concentrate. The mysterious stranger had not followed her but then, as the dragon made another swoop towards her, Jac knew he wouldn’t. She was on her own in this godforsaken place. Jonny was gone and Jac knew that she was trapped. Her mind flicked back to images of Hollie and the memory of the woman she was destined to become. Jac shuddered when she remembered the tattoo. She froze. Her chest heaving, Jac slowly opened her eyes; the dragon was resting one of its claws on her shoulder. The grip was tight and however hard Jac tried, she could not free herself from its grasp. There seemed to be no escape for her and then in the midsts of it all, the dragon spoke. Its voice was deep but there was a musical quality to it and above that, a sense of the vastness of the creature, something magical that had spanned the aeons of this world.   
“Who are you?” the dragon asked enunciating each syllable very deliberately. Jac had gone as white as the early morning frost and just shook her head numbly. The dragon’s grip tightened on her shoulder and she felt sure that the claws would soon pierce her skin. “I’ll ask again,” the dragon announced, “who are you and what are you doing in my domain?” Jac swept her hair out of her eyes and took a deep breath. Her heart was still thumping and each second that passed felt like an impenetrable hour of silence.   
“My name is Jac,” Jac said and shivered as she waited for the dragon’s inevitable response.   
“And what are you doing here, Jac?” The dragon growled and out of the corner of her eye, Jac could have sworn she saw a dark bulbous tongue curl around a fang stained in blood. “Answer me for you are trespassing in the lands of my home and you will see what happens to those who defy me.” With that the dragon raised its free arm and indicated the burnt, dead scenery all around them. As it pointed, Jac saw at last what she had not seen before; dozens and dozens of charred skeletons piled upon each other until their bones had collapsed under the sheer weight of them. Their eyeless sockets staring forever into the auburn sky.   
“I came here by accident,” Jac said but this seemed to enrage the beast further for its wings flapped with agitation and its spiked tail swung in both directions.   
“Did I not tell you not to defy me?” Jac knew her situation was hopeless and that fact served only to alleviate her fear. The courage was beginning to soar through her bones.   
“You asked for the truth and I told you. I travelled with two men in a strange box, we did not mean to come here.”   
“A strange box you say?” The dragon asked with curiosity. “Where is this box now?”   
“I don’t know,” Jac said and glanced down at the blackened grass. “I lost my way,” she added but she immediately wished she hadn’t as the dragon suddenly gripped her even tighter. The claws teared through her skin at last and Jac could feel the blood seeping down her back; the pain was tremendous but Jac clenched her teeth and struggled through it. She would not let this creature think that it had got the best of her.   
“You lie Jac Naylor, you lie like all the human scum that cross my path,” Jac’s heart skipped a beat.  
“I never told you my surname,” she mouthed.The dragon laughed and the sound was something vile like the scratching of fingernails down a blackboard. Jac clapped her hands to her ears just to blot it out.   
“I know all, I see all, I am everywhere. I am King.”  
“King?” Jac asked although she did not know what made her say it. “Of what?” The dragon curled its lips and smiled toothily at her.   
“I am King of everything.”   
“Let me go and we’ll see how much of a king you are,” Jac growled at the beast.   
“You would dare to challenge me?” The dragon roared with laughter, it echoed around the world like a jeering catcall. Jac was defiant and there was nothing for it but to stand her ground or face a fiery death.   
“I would dare,” Jac said and wrenched her shoulder out of the creature’s grasp; she felt the claws graze her skin as they broke away and the pain was twofold but she did not care. She would fight this beast whatever it took. The dragon flapped its wings and took off from the ground until it was out of her reach. “Coward!” Jac called after its retreating body but that was a mistake. With an almighty roar the dragon looped around and sent a jet of white hot flame at her, Jac just managed to roll away to the side but she felt the side of torso singe.   
“I know what you are looking for!” The dragon bellowed at her as it circled and swooped in the sky, always keeping Jac within its sight. “I know what it is that you seek here!” Jac’s face was flushed but she stood her ground as best she could.  
“If you know everything then why don’t you just tell me instead of gloating?”   
“You seek the whereabouts of the man who came before you,” the dragon replied with satisfaction etched into its every utterance. “I have news on that for you.” Jac showed no flinching on the outside but within, her insides were screaming.   
“I am not afraid of you,” she told it.   
“They all say that and yet I can always smell the fear in your souls. It belittles you, it weakens you. Fear is a disease that must be stamped out. You are nothing but vermin riddled with disease and a fragile life so easily snuffed out. I tore the fear out of his still beating heart.” Jac felt a sudden wave of fury wash through her veins and she clenched her teeth at the cackling beast.   
“There is only one person who I would ever allow to touch that man,” Jac snarled and waited with bated breath for the dragon’s answer.   
“Oh and who is that?” the dragon called as it leered at her from beneath the lowest clouds. Jac saw a sudden glint of silver and stared down at the broadsword that had appeared out of thin air. The handle was encrusted with a scarlet jewel and there were strange markings upon it that Jac could not read and yet she knew in her heart what they must mean. The dragon had also spotted the weapon and for the first time Jac noticed that it was afraid.   
“Myself,” Jac declared and with two hands gripping the handle she wrenched the sword out of the ground and held it up to the sky. The blade stretched nearly two metres in length, its metal thick and heavy to the touch. Jac did not know where her newfound strength had come from but she relished the opportunity to show what she was made of.   
The dragon kept its distance and sent fire cascading from its open mouth at every opportunity. Jac was ready for it however and dodged each jet of flame with ease. This only served to enrage the beast further.   
“He screamed as I wreathed him in fire,” the dragon bellowed at Jac. “You should have seen his flesh bubbling,” the beast licked its lips greedily as it started to shoot towards Jac. “I swallowed his dead flesh whole,” it continued and drew ever closer to Jac who stood silent, overcome by shock. “I wasn’t even hungry,” it jeered. “But he looked so delicious with his melted eyes and cracked skin oozing the flesh from within.” Without realising it Jac found herself walking backwards away from the oncoming onslaught of the dragon. She ducked as a fresh jet of flame flew over her head. Her side where the dragon’s fiery breath had caught her earlier sent shockwaves of pain through the depths of her body and Jac’s legs suddenly collapsed under the strain of it all. The dragon was closing in on her now, in a few seconds it would all be over but she would be him. Regret was flooding through Jac, regret for the way she had treated him and a burning desire to put right the damage she had caused. She hoped that he could forgive her; hot tears burned in her eyes.   
“You didn’t deserve to die this way,” Jac murmured softly. “I’m sorry for everything; I hope one day Hollie can forgive me.” The dragon’s laughter ricocheted around her.   
“Your world shall be my new dominion and it will burn under the gaze of my breath. Your daughter will be the first to perish in the new age and I will toy with her skeleton as I feast on her wretched flesh!” A new surge filled Jac and she stood tall and proud once again. “She will die cursing your name and the miserable life you gave her!” The dragon’s wrath was terrible to behold but it paled in comparison to the fury that shone in every fibre of Jac’s being. The beast was too cocksure however and merely continued to taunt her. It knew nothing of the concept of a mother’s love. It knew nothing of the lengths Jac would go to keep Hollie safe from harm. “You’re never going to see her again,” the dragon bellowed and Jac could smell its putrid breath edging closer and closer into the path of her sword. “She will grow up the child of another woman and the memory of you will fade over time until there is nothing left in her soul.” Jac kept her hands tightly gripped around the sword’s thick handle. The dragon was almost within reach and Jac knew what she had to do. There would be only one chance to get it right. “I will torture her before I kill her. Perhaps I will pull her limbs from their sockets and force her to eat her own feet. I will make her chew her own raw flesh and then,” the dragon paused for what it obviously considered to be dramatic effect, “I will spill her guts with a single swipe of my claws. She will live just long enough to see her innards laid out before her.” Jac’s hands were sweating as she clenched the sword as hard as he could. Sweat dripped from her brow and into her mouth but her mind was fixed on only one thing. Nothing else mattered any more. The fading light of the day seemed to shine through the dragon’s crooked and scarred scales; they glittered like chain mail armour.   
“I have dealt with patients that terrify me more than you,” Jac declared and raised her sword up as high as she could. “I have seen lives destroyed and fall apart into nothing. I have watched families held together only by their grief and I have watched as time has run out for the very best of humanity. I can perform a heart bypass with my eyes shut and I know what it is that makes it tick. I have lived a life of pain, desire and regret but do you want to know what the one thing I have never regretted is? My daughter. I would give my life for her if it would keep her safe. Do not come between us or I will end you. You are not a King and this world is nothing but an illusion of hell. I have lived in the flames of real life and nothing you can do could ever hope to hurt me as much as I hurt myself. You are nothing. You’ve taken Jonny away from me but no more. You will not lay one filthy stinking claw on Hollie. I am a mother! I am her mother!” Jac knew that the time had come at last and she thrust the sword up as hard as she could. The blade pierced the dragon’s underbelly and writhed and shrieked; blood gushed from its wound and showered Jac. She wrenched the sword away and watched as the ignoble creature fell to the ground with a crash that made the trees shake and the rocks quiver. The light had gone out from its once proud eyes. It was dead. Jac swayed unsteadily and collapsed. 

It seemed like an age had passed before Jac finally regained consciousness. She could hear voices muttering above her but she couldn’t make out what they were saying. She felt dizzy and lightheaded; the shock from taking on a fully grown dragon no doubt. She opened her eyes but the light seemed to dazzle her and it took a few moments for Jac to realise that it wasn’t sunlight which streamed into her eyes.   
“Where am I?” She murmured; her voice was weak and her throat croaked.   
“Home,” said Jonny. Jac sat up with a start. She blinked until she saw Jonny’s face swim into her view.   
“How can you be here?” she asked quietly. “He told me you were dead.”   
“He lied,” Jonny reassured her. “You’re freezing,” he said and wrapped a blanket around Jac’s shoulders. She did not flinch and felt a strange relaxation wash over her as the snugness spread from the warm fabric.   
“I thought I’d lost you,” Jac murmured even quieter. “I had to-“  
“Had to what?” Jonny asked. His voice shone with concern as Jac seemed ready to slip out of consciousness again. Jac opened her eyes.  
“I had to get back to her. I couldn’t leave her here alone.” Jonny stared at her and felt a sharp pang as he saw that her face was covered in silent tears. “She’s never going to be alone again. I promise you.” Jonny held her hands in his.  
“And I promise you,” he began, “I promise you, I will always be here for her. For both of you.” Jac gave him a weak smile through the steady waterfall of tears.   
“Hold me,” she whispered. Jonny did as he was told and wrapped his arms around her. She pressed her head into his chest and she felt safe at last.   
“I love you,” Jonny said softly. “I always have.” Jac lifted her head up and stared into his eyes. They too were brimmed with silent silver tears.  
“I love you too,” Jac replied. “You’re my idiot.” Jonny couldn’t help but laugh and they both held on to each other tighter than before.   
“Dada!” Jac and Jonny broke apart and looked across the room at their beautiful daughter. Hollie was standing upright and grinning broadly at the pair of them. “Mama.” Her voice had that air of a young child, something so gentle that it filled everybody with love and warmth. “Mama, Dada!” Hollie walked towards them with her arms outstretched as though she wanted to be included in the family embrace. It had been a long time coming but Jac and Jonny laughed again. 

Two Days Later

“Your only option is a transplant, Mr. Burrows, but with your history of alcohol abuse I’m afraid they simply won’t look at your case. You have to make a significant effort to improve your lifestyle simply because you are risking your life. Without a transplant you have only months to live, if that.” Simon stared at the worried expression etched into his GP’s face. He smiled and nodded to indicate that he had understood.   
“I’m making a big effort,” Simon said. “Got my first AA meeting in the new year.”  
“That’s good, very good Simon. I will give you an appointment for the weekend after next, how does that sound?”   
“That sounds perfect,” Simon said and then he grinned broadly. “It’s about time I got my act together.” His GP nodded and took off his spectacles so that he could give the lenses a quick wipe with the cloth he now took from his top pocket.   
“Life often gets on top of us,” the GP said once he had replaced the glasses back on to his nose. “It takes the best of us to know how to climb back up.”   
“Well exactly,” Simon agreed. “I’ve lost everything because of my own stupidity and I want the chance to put things right. To settle a few scores,” he added as an afterthought.   
“With perseverance and a positive attitude I know you can make a difference to your life.”   
“Oh I intend to,” Simon said in his softest and most dangerous tone of voice. “It’s been a very long time since I last saw my family.”   
“You must miss them,” said the GP with an affectionate look at Simon. Ever the master of disguise, Simon’s expression was one of feigned regret but his GP lapped it up like a dog presented with its first food for the day.   
“Oh terribly,” Simon told him. “It’s not been the same without her.” He stood up and offered his hand to the GP who shook it willingly. “Thank you for your time Ian,” Simon bowed and started to walk away.  
“A pleasure as always,” Ian called after his retreating figure.   
Simon stepped out into the bright cold air and started to laugh. His liver still pained him greatly but all he wanted to do was laugh and drink and find her.   
“I’m coming,” he whispered. “I’m coming for you Jas.” 

END OF ACT TWO  
TO BE CONTINUED


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

PART TWENTY-ONE  
ACT THREE

Friday 9th January 2015 - Ten Days Until The Wedding

Jac Naylor sat with her back to Jonny, her eyes poring over a shining new book. It was a large and weighty tome with shining gold letters adorning the cover. Cardiothoracics and the 21st Century: Progresses and Setbacks by Professor Elliot Hope. Inside the sleeve there was a handwritten note addressed to Jac. 

Dear Jac,  
Thought you might like a copy,  
Elliot.

Jac smiled halfheartedly at the note but her stomach was twisted into knots; she had been out of work for nearly a year, ever since the accident, and she was itching to get back into it again. Over in his armchair by the crackling fire, Jonny could see Jac’s fingers flicking between each page of the book. On the mantelpiece an antique clock ticked reliably as the evening wore on into the night. It was Jac who broke the silence first:  
“How’s Darwin?” She asked with what she hoped would be nothing more than a casual interest but Jonny had been expecting this and he picked up the tone of longing hidden in her voice. He wasn’t sure how best to approach the subject however and instead, with a casual swallow, decided to answer Jac’s question as it was.   
“Same old,” Jonny began. “Elliot’s been regaling us with tales of his book signings and Mo-“ Jonny stopped suddenly. He and Mo had still not reconciled after her mistake all those months ago. Jac had done her best to get them to talk but it had been to no avail; Jonny was determined not to forgive her.   
“What about Mo?” Jac asked but Jonny’s eyes flashed anger and the tightness of his lips indicated that that discussion was not worth broaching.   
“How’s Elliot’s book?” Jonny asked as he placed a fresh log on the dying fire. The flames crackled gratefully as they snaked around the dry wood and licked at its bark. Jac turned the book over in her lap and her eyes scanned the blurb.   
“Pretty much what you might expect from Elliot. Detailed, researched with an unmistakeable air of sentimentality about it.” Jonny laughed.  
“So any plans to write your own book then?” Jac scowled but then her face contorted into a wide smile when she realised Jonny was deliberately trying to push her buttons.   
“I’m surprised you haven’t written the complete overview of nursing yet. Oh wait, that would be what ten pages at most?”   
“You surgeons would be nothing without us nurses watching your backs,” Jonny shot back at her with a wink. Jac sniggered:  
“Oh please, without surgeons doing all the hard work, you nurses would all be out of a job.”   
“Nurses are the most important part of the team,” Jonny countered.   
“Oh are they?” Jac said with a snort of derision. “Next time I’m prepping for a triple heart bypass, I’ll tell the patient that you’ll be performing it.” There was an uncomfortable silence when Jac realised what she had let slip. Jonny looked at her, watching as her eyes took in everything on the page and he realised at last what he had to do.   
“You miss it don’t you?” Jonny’s words cut through the air like a dagger and he knew he had struck a chord with Jac. She slammed the book shut and placed it on the small table beside her.   
“Yes,” Jac whispered. “I do miss it.” Jonny cleared his throat.   
“What if I told you there’s going to be a vacancy on Darwin very soon?” Jac looked over her shoulder and stared at him so fast that she almost sent the book and table cascading to the floor. She straightened her jacket and looked quickly at her feet in an effort to seem nonchalant about the situation.   
“It’s probably just an F2 or Registrar position,” Jac replied with the tiniest hint of bitterness in her voice.   
“Why don’t you take a look?” With that Jonny thrust his laptop at her and pointed at the screen; Jac saw that he had opened up the vacancies page on Holby’s recently spruced up webpage. Her eyes scanned past the list of porters, a surprisingly large number of vacancies, until she came to the part she was most interested in. 

Registrar - Neurology Department

Jac scrolled past this; neurology was not an area she had ever shown much interest in, her desire lay, for the time being, in cardiothoracic surgery. 

Consultant - Histology Department

Another scroll past; histology was the joke of the hospital with its batty staff and peculiar methods of working. Jac remembered the time when a young F2 from the Emergency Department, eager to impress, had taken on extra shifts in Histology and had formed a close bond with the bizarrely named Dr. Doom. Jac had forgotten his real name, Dominic or something. It had been at least five years since his departure from the hospital under a fairly ominous cloud over his competency. It had all been hushed up of course but Jac recalled the staffroom gossip when Dom had announced his decision to resign. It wasn’t often that news from Histology reached the rest of the hospital but that had been one of those rare moments. 

Consultant - Emergency Department

Jac was all set to scroll past this when she found that her eyes kept drifting back up to the grey emboldened and italicised vacancy. She looked at the rest of the page and saw that there was nothing yet listed for Darwin.   
“Were you trying to be funny? There’s nothing here for Darwin.”   
“I said there might be one soon,” Jonny retaliated. Jac looked up at him.  
“Okay if you’re so sure, who?”   
“Ms. Kudrow,” Jonny replied and he smiled as Jac stared at him, her expression blank.   
“Who?”  
“Ms. Kudrow, she was your err…replacement,” Jonny explained. Jac’s eyebrows narrowed.  
“She hasn’t lasted very long if she’s leaving,” muttered Jac. Jonny heard her and he couldn’t help letting out a quiet snigger.   
“Let’s just say she hasn’t really fitted in.”   
“Ah, one of those,” said Jac with a knowing glance at Jonny. “She’s another Geddes.” Jonny stared at her and as Jac caught sight of his frown, her lips curled into a fresh smile as she cast her mind back to the dark times that had been the Toby Geddes era.   
“What’s a Geddes?”   
“Toby Geddes,” Jac began with relish. “Was an idiot who for a brief time assumed the consultancy on Darwin. I say it was brief, the time we had with him was more than long enough.”  
“What was wrong with him?”  
“What was right with him?” Jac’s response was quick and sharp. She cleared her throat, sweeping her auburn hair out of her eyes at the same time. “He was lazy, incompetent and full of himself. You know how it takes a lot to make Elliot truly angry?”  
“Yes?” Jonny asked although he had a good inkling that he knew the answer.   
“Geddes managed it.” Jac laughed at the memory. “I remember Joseph-“ She stopped suddenly and bit her lip, hoping that Jonny wouldn’t notice the mention of her ex. The memory of Joseph was still painful and Jac avoided talking about him as much as possible, not least because it would be unfair on Jonny but also partly because Jac had still not forgiven him for that crass wedding invite two years ago. Jonny had caught the sound of Joseph’s name but a quick look at the expression on Jac’s face told him that it was a subject not worth pursuing.   
“What happened to Geddes?”   
“His contract was terminated. I don’t know where he ended up, somewhere outside of Holby or something.” Jac’s eyes flickered back at the ED vacancy. “I might apply for this one,” she said slowly with much deliberation etched into her voice. Jonny looked over her shoulder at the vacancy she was pointing at and his eyes widened in surprise.   
“Histology? You? Call me stupid but I don’t think that’s really your area.” Jac rolled her eyes at him with exasperation.  
“No not Histology you cretin, Jonny, that one!” Jonny’s eyes followed the path of her finger.   
“Emergency Department,” Jonny said aloud to himself. “That’s quite a big career change for you, are you sure you’re up to it?”   
“What’s that supposed to mean?”  
“Nothing, I’m just not sure if it’s the right move for you.”  
“You don’t think I can cope with it do you?”   
“No, I didn’t say that I-“  
“I could do that job with my eyes shut,” Jonny caught the look of pure determination in Jac’s eyes and they both burst out laughing.   
“Okay, okay,” Jonny tried to say through fits of laughter. “Go for it. You know I’ve always got your back.”   
“I’m going to apply,” replied Jac. “All they can do is say no.”   
“Exactly,” Jonny told her.  
“They won’t say no, will they?” A sudden bout of insecurity had washed over Jac and Jonny found himself placing a comforting arm around her shoulder. Jac did not flinch and instead tugged at his hand as though she was trying to pull it closer to her.   
“When they see your application, they won’t be able to refuse. Trust me.” Jac twisted her neck and leant her head back onto Jonny’s arm. 

Saturday 10th January - 9 Days Until The Wedding

Jac stared at the flashing email notification on Jonny’s laptop but there was something preventing her opening up the email to see what it contained. Every time she brought the cursor over the icon her hand dropped away and with it so did the cursor.   
“Go on then, open it. Let’s see what they say,” Jonny called to her as he pulled on his shoes for his shift.   
“They might say no,” Jac mumbled.  
“They might say yes,” replied Jonny and he smiled encouragingly at her. “I believe in you, okay?” Jac tried to smile but her muscles were tense and instead she could only look anxiously at Jonny. “Believe in yourself.” Jac took a deep breath and clicked the icon.   
“Here goes,” she said as they waited for the email to appear on the screen. Her heart was thumping in her chest and she felt it plummet as the page finally loaded. 

Dear Ms. Naylor,  
Thank you very much for your detailed and illuminating application. I appreciate this is short notice but, if at all possible, we would like to invite you for an interview at 2:30pm on Saturday 10th January 2015. Please email back by 11:30am to confirm your interest or arrange a date for another time.   
Regards,   
Guy Self, CEO 

“There you go,” said Jonny and he patted Jac on the back affectionately. “I told you they’d love you.” Jac was sitting in a stunned silence, her eyes continually rereading the email until it sunk in deep into her the farthest reaches of her mind. She had not expected such a quick response.   
“I’d better email back,” she said at last and quickly composed a brief reply and noted down her acceptance for the proposed interview time and date. “2:30 it is.”   
“You’ll ace it,” Jonny replied. “Listen, I’d better get going or I’ll have Elliot on my back. Call me after the interview?” Jac nodded. Jonny did not see but her hands were trembling as the reality of the situation began to descend over her. 

“Jonny!” Mo was beckoning him as he strolled on to Darwin with his hands trying to stifle a broad yawn. “Rough night was it?” Jonny could see Mo was trying to be friendly but every time he looked at her, his heart flared with anger and he found it difficult to look at her, let alone talk to her. He made to walk past her but Mo grabbed his arm and held him back. “We need to talk Maconie,” she said defiantly.   
“Let go of me.”   
“This has gone on long enough.”   
“I said let go of me.”   
“Not until you agree to talk.”  
“Fine!” Jonny snapped at her and Mo released him. “When?”  
“Lunch break. We’re both off at the same time.” Jonny considered this and with a considerable air of reluctance, he nodded. Before Mo could respond however, Jonny had marched away without looking back at her. 

“How are you feeling today Mrs. Dalton?” asked Jonny and he smiled at his patient. Mrs. Elaine Dalton, 86, was incredibly frail; her arms were as thin as twigs and her hair was nothing more than a few wispy strands whitened with age. The monitor behind them beeped away as she opened her grey eyes and smiled a toothy grin at Jonny. Elaine had been admitted onto Darwin just after the Christmas period after suffering a small heart attack and was making a slow but steady improvement as each day went by.   
“You know me, same old,” Elaine whispered delicately at Jonny.   
“Very pleased to hear that,” Jonny replied. “No chest pains or irritation?”  
“None. It’s been a pretty uneventful night to tell you the truth. I’m sorry to be such a nuisance.”   
“You’re not a nuisance,” Jonny told her as he performed the necessary obs. “I hear you’ve been brightening up the ward.” Elaine’s eyes lit up with a wondrous delight that Jonny had not seen in them before.  
“Have I? Have I really?”   
“I’ve been told all about your little stories,” Jonny grinned at her. “You’ve made quite an impression on some of our younger patients.” Elaine tried to be calm but there was no disguising the look of delight etched into the fabric of her features.   
“You’ve all been so wonderful to me,” she said and she was beaming broadly. “I hardly know how to thank you.”   
“There’s no need, it’s been a pleasure treating you. I wish all our patients were as cheerful as you. To tell you the truth-“ Jonny paused and bent down to whisper in her ear. “Some of the doctors could use a little extra cheeriness.” Elaine giggled.   
“Well look at that one,” Elaine pointed at Ms. Kudrow who was trying, with little progress, to examine her patient. “With a face as moody as hers, it’s little wonder the poor thing doesn’t want her examining her.” Jonny suppressed laughter as he wagged disapproving finger at Elaine. “Well at my time of life, I’m entitled to be naughty,” she replied. “Anyway, when do I get to go home? I need some peace and quiet, not that I’ll get much at home mind. Did I tell you about Robert, my husband?” Jonny had of course been told all about Robert but he understood that beneath her joviality, Elaine was prone to bouts of forgetfulness. All part and parcel with being 86.   
“You’ve told me a lot about him,” Jonny gazed at her kindly. “Oh and don’t hold me to this, but I think you might be able to home this afternoon. No promises though.” Elaine nodded at him and laid her head back down on the pillow.  
“I think I might just have a little nap then,” she told him.   
“Call me if you need me,” Jonny replied.   
“I’m sure I won’t,” Elaine said, opening her eyes and winking at him. 

Jonny had barely started to drink his coffee when Mo pulled up a chair opposite him and sat down heavily.   
“So!” Mo announced as she waited for Jonny to take a sip and replace the mug on the table.   
“So what?”  
“We need to sort this out Maconie. I miss my partner in crime.” Jonny opened his mouth and was all set to retort angrily at her when he suddenly caught the look of genuine sorrow etched behind her eyes. He hadn’t realised until now just how sorry Mo had been and how much she must have tortured herself over what had nearly happened to Hollie. Already he could feel the anger in his heart burning out and as he continued to stare at Mo, it hit him that he sorely missed his best friend.   
“I’ve been a right idiot,” Jonny said at last. “I don’t know what I’d do without my Mo,” at these words, they both leant across the table and hugged each other.   
“You don’t know how much I’ve wanted to hear you say that.” Jonny smiled. “Life is so boring without a Maconie in it!” 

The interview room was cold, beige and had an unmistakeable aura of foreboding around its featureless walls. There was a singular large window in the centre of the far wall that overlooked a car park far below and much of the room was taken up by a long table with a multitude of chairs adorning it. Three of the chairs were taken up in the centre of the table; Jac recognised two of the figures but the man in the centre was unfamiliar. This must be Guy Self, Jac thought to herself.   
“Please take a seat,” Guy instructed her and Jac, her knees trembling uncharacteristically, sat down. “My name is Guy Self, I’m told that you already know Charlie Fairhead and Connie Beauchamp.” Jac nodded. “Shall we get started then?” Guy did not wait for an answer and instead plunged straight into the interview. “We were very impressed with your application,” Guy paused and waited for both Charlie and Connie to nod. “I suppose my first question is, why Emergency Medicine, why now?” Jac took a deep breath and considered the best answer she could think of.   
“I suppose after spending a lot of my professional career in the field of cardiothoracics and taking a year out due to personal reasons,” Jac paused to take breath. “I felt it was time for new challenges and I’m confident a position in the ED at Holby will provide that.”  
“I see.” It was Connie who spoke this time and as her eyes bored into hers, Jac wondered what her former mentor was thinking. Did she perhaps feel that Jac harboured a wish to follow, as she had done, into the dark depths of Emergency Medicine with a view to becoming Clinical Lead one day? “You were joint Consultant of Darwin for around three years, am I correct?” Jac nodded. “Could you tell us a little bit about the circumstances of your departure?”   
Jac felt her heart plunging like a stone through a wet paper bag as she was forced to recall the events that had led to her departure. She told them how she had fought with her half-sister - Connie raised an eyebrow at this and Charlie had frowned but Guy made no indication as to what he was thinking. Then Jac had reached the part she had been dreading the most; she flinched as she recalled the attack she had suffered upon leaving the hospital that day. Jac sensed that Charlie had noticed her trembling as he had shot her an encouraging smile as if to tell her that everything would be okay. She had forgotten how Charlie was like that, the lynchpin of the hospital. It would be a sad day when he finally had to call it a day.   
“Emergency Medicine is a big change from cardiothoracics, do you feel you’re ready for it?” Charlie’s voice was warm but underneath it, his question was a serious one and Jac knew she would have to answer it carefully.   
“Well,” Jac began…

Jac’s heart was still pounding against her chest as she waited to be called back in and have her fate decided. Twenty minutes had so far passed and Jac was beginning to wonder about what they could possibly be discussing. She was too busy silently panicking to notice an exhausted looking Sacha taking a seat beside her.   
“Didn’t expect to see you here,” Sacha said loudly and brought Jac crashing back to earth with a jolt.   
“You’re still here then?” Sacha laughed but his face was lined and Jac saw that he had aged quite a lot since she had last seen him. She couldn’t help feeling slightly saddened by it; age did not suit his jovial manner.   
“Yeah I’m just hanging on. Not literally of course, that would be rather silly.” Sacha’s smile was infectious and Jac found herself smiling back at him. “So what are you doing waiting here then? Bit lonely on your own isn’t it?”   
“Just had an interview in there,” Jac paused and pointed at the door to the interview room that lay a little way up ahead from the where she was waiting.   
“You’re coming back? That’s fantastic news!” Sacha grabbed her and enveloped her into one of his customary bear hugs.   
“Gerroff me you great oaf!” Jac called out but she was secretly heartened by it.   
“Oh we have missed you! It’s not been the same without you.” Sacha was beaming broadly and Jac knew it would break his heart when she explained what her interview had been for. Sure enough, his face momentarily fell but he quickly pulled himself together and smiled again. “Well it’s the same place after all, I’m sure I’ll see you around.” Sacha had started to walk away when struck by a sudden thought, Jac called him back.  
“Sacha wait!” He stopped and looked at her curiously. Jac wondered if he knew what she was about to ask him. There was no reason why he would of course.   
“Jac?” Sacha asked her, his voice quiet and considered. Jac opened her mouth to respond but no words came out. “Cat got your tongue?” Jac shook her head, she knew Sacha was just trying to make light of the situation as he always did but she wished he understood how difficult this was for her. It was not a question Jac had ever thought she would ask and certainly she would never have guessed it would be Sacha who she asked.   
“Sacha,” Jac swallowed and closed her eyes willing against hope that her nerves would not get the better of her. She drew herself up to her full height and decided that she would just have to get it over with. But what if he said no? Jac’s mind told her darkly. No, she shook her head; she was determined not to let herself ruin things as usual. “Sacha,” she began again and this time her old confidence seemed to have returned. “I’m getting married in nine days and I wondered if you would like to give me away?” Sacha stared at her dumbfounded; Jac could feel her heart pounding faster than it ever had before and she prepared herself for his inevitable but kind refusal.   
“I don’t know what to say,” Sacha said incredulously.   
“It’s fine, you don’t have to say anything,” Jac told him.   
“Wow.”   
“It’s okay if you don’t want to, I understand.”   
“Don’t want to? Jac, of course I want to! Nothing would give me a greater pleasure than that.” Jac was caught so unawares that she found she was crying silently. Tears of pure joy. They were a rare occurrence for Jac Naylor. The next thing she knew Sacha was hugging her again and they were both laughing with delight.  
“They’re ready for you now,” said a voice behind Jac.   
“Good luck, not that you need it,” Sacha called to her as Jac opened the door to the interview room and stepped inside.   
“We apologise for the long wait,” Guy said before Jac had even sat down. “I’m sure you can understand that it has been a very difficult decision. A lot of factors had to be weighed up before we could come to a decision.” Jac was twiddling her thumbs absentmindedly as she waited with baited breath for the decision. Guy was difficult to read but neither Charlie nor Connie were showing any indication either way.   
“We felt, and Charlie and Guy both agree with me on this, that you show an extraordinary degree of willing to take up this post, something which of course would be of enormous benefit,” Connie continued after Guy had left off.   
“Indeed,” said Charlie. “It was also clear that your thirst to learn is still there; a major part of being a consultant in the ED is that you are constantly learning new ways to deal with certain situations.” Jac nodded; she dared not hope but it seemed as if the decision might just be swinging her way a little.   
“There was some concern over the manner of your departure but it was decided that if you can learn from your mistakes there should be no reason not to give you a second chance,” Connie continued. Jac thought her heart would just about burst out of her chest if they kept in her suspense for too much longer.   
“To cut a long story short,” Guy announced cutting across Charlie who looked as if he had been about to say something else. “It gives me great pleasure to offer you the job.” Jac sat in a stunned silence, her emotions were all over the place; she hoped beyond hope that there were no tears. “Do you accept?” Guy asked and extended his hand to Jac. Jac nodded and shook his hand, then Connie’s and finally Charlie’s.   
“Welcome to the team,” said Charlie and Jac saw that he was smiling warmly at her.   
“It’s a new beginning,” Jac announced. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	22. Chapter 22

PART TWENTY-TWO

Sunday 11th January - 8 Days Until The Wedding

Jasmine was running; everywhere she looked she could see burning effigies hanging from trees and beneath a starless sky. Her eyes were wreathed in crackling flames so bright that she thought they would blind her. As she squinted through the dense foliage there was a sharp sound behind her like the snapping of a dry twig as a foot steps over it. Jasmine could feel the cold sweat dripping from her forehead and her legs ached and throbbed from the constant running. She didn’t know where she was running to or what she was running from, all she knew was that she had to keep on going as fast as she could and escape from the terror that clouded over her.   
Jasmine stopped suddenly. This wasn’t right, her mind thought desperately. She looked all around, searching for an explanation.   
“I know this place,” she muttered under her breath. “The wood ends there, it doesn’t stretch ahead endlessly to the horizon.” Her heart pounded in her chest; she hesitated, the colour drained from her face and left her as pale as a ghost. Everything fell silent and then she heard it once again. The snap of dry twigs hanging in the air like an echo behind her and drawing closer and closer. There was nothing for it, Jasmine thought. She would have to choose a direction and keep running wherever it might take her. She moved her front leg gingerly forward, the exhaustion almost caused her to collapse but there was a newfound determination in her heart. “Come on Jas,” she whispered. “Come on…”   
She was running again, sprinting between the trees and away from the fire that lay behind her. Jasmine could still see the flames in her eyes however, they crackled and spat and seemed to her to be the very entrance of hell itself. A dark shadow passed overhead and whilst it lingered, a freezing cold chill descended upon the endless wood. Jasmine pushed herself on further but by now the pain was becoming unbearable and she knew that she would have to stop soon before she collapsed. The sound of the snapping twigs was now ringing in her ears; they grew faster and louder and in that moment, Jasmine knew that her pursuer was chasing her at a sprint. She pushed her legs forward but the strain had finally become too much for her and with an awkward twist of her ankles, Jasmine found herself falling face first into the cold, hard ground.   
She spat out leaves and could taste blood and dirt in the back of her throat. Her hair was matted and as she raised her arms in the air, the smell of sour sweat engulfed her. The pursuer was nearly upon her now. White as a sheet, Jasmine staggered upright and knowing that her legs would not carry her for long, she turned and faced the behind. She stood defiantly and waited with her arms folded across her chest. Any second now she would be faced with whatever it was that pursued her and she would at last know. The seconds drew on interminably until at last a shadowy figure stepped out into the light and Jasmine laid eyes upon him. The cold, grey eyes. The breath of beer and stale cigarettes. The crooked, yellowed teeth. She screamed and at last, she awoke. 

“You were dreaming again,” Charlie murmured. Jasmine sat up straight, her face still white and her heart still pounding. “What was it about this time?” Jasmine swallowed nervously before considering her response.   
“The same as before,” she told Charlie.   
“We need to do something about that, it’s affecting you. Everyone can see it,” Charlie said and she leant forward to kiss Jasmine’s forehead.   
“I can’t help it,” Jasmine began and her voice was frail and soft. “Every time I close my eyes, I see him and I can’t shake it. My subconscious is continually running, I wake up out of breath, like I’ve just run a bloody marathon!”   
“Everybody’s worried about you.”   
“I know,” Jasmine said and shrugged helplessly. “What can I do? What must I do to get rid of him?” Charlie’s face fell and Jasmine could see that she was struggling too. “I won’t force you to stay,” Jasmine muttered.   
“I want to,” Charlie insisted. “He is not going to tear us apart, you understand me?” Jasmine looked for a moment as if she wanted to argue but she thought better of it and just smiled instead. Charlie frowned: All she wanted was to give Jasmine the best life she possibly could but the longer the shadow of what her father had done hung over her, she knew Jasmine would never be truly healed.   
“I can’t let him find me here,” said Jasmine all of a sudden. “This is the one place, I know I’m safe.” Charlie took her hand and squeezed it with what she hoped was reassurance. “He won’t take this away from me.” Charlie looked away for she didn’t want Jasmine to see the tears brimming and sparkling in her eyes.   
“I won’t let him,” she gulped. 

“Dear Jac, wishing you lots of luck on your first day, wish I could be there to cheer you on, Sacha,” Jac read aloud as Jonny handed her the card that had been dropped through the letterbox that morning. “It’s a bit sad really,” she said and propped the card up on the mantlepiece behind her.   
“Jac,” Jonny began and Jac saw that he was frowning at her.   
“You look ridiculous,” she replied simply. From the floor they heard Hollie let out a soft giggle. Jonny bent down, picked her up and cradled her in his arms. He tickled her belly; Hollie giggled louder.   
“Should’ve known you’d take your mummy’s side,” Jonny laughed. “What is this, gingers united?”   
“She was hardly going to take yours,” Jac said with a sly wink at Hollie whose eyes lit up and she smiled so broadly that she began to dribble out of the corners of her mouth. Jonny wiped the dribble away with a small piece of tissue in his pocket.   
“Who’s a mucky little thing, eh?” As he rocked her from side to side in his arms, he couldn’t help but be amazed by how much she had grown in the last few months. She was beginning to get quite heavy now but she wasn’t nearly so heavy as to be too difficult to carry. Her auburn hair was an untidy mess over her scalp but every time Jonny looked into her big, green eyes, he felt his heart dissolve as it had done the first time he had laid eyes upon her.   
“I need to get going, don’t want to be late on my first day,” Jac said, glancing down at her watch and panicking slightly at the time. “Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own?” Jonny smiled.  
“Jac, I’ve been on my own with her plenty of times. I’ll cope!” Jac began to walk towards the door but then she hesitated and hung back.   
“You’ll sort everything out?”  
“I’ve got the list right here,” Jonny replied and held up a sheet of paper with Jac’s handwriting scribbled across it.   
“Don’t forget to book the venue,” Jac instructed him. It was so unlike her to be this stressed about something as trivial in her mind as a wedding but then, Jonny thought, it was her own wedding. It had to be as perfect as the dreams of a little girl willed it to be.   
“Go!” Jonny pressed at Jac until at last she had stopped fretting and was sitting astride her motorbike, the engine spluttering to life. 

Simon’s lips curled into a twisted smile as he watched Jasmine undressing behind the curtain in her bedroom. His tongue wrapped around his teeth and he laughed as he thought how easy it had been to track her down. The bitch, that was what he called Jasmine’s girlfriend, was out and it would be so simple to sneak into the house and take her. In, out. He could be done in a matter of minutes and no one would ever know he had even been there. His smile broadened maliciously and he could feel his feet beginning to take steps towards the house and then, just like that, he stopped. A surge of guilt swept over him and he fell back into the shadows. Simon did not leave however, instead he watched and waited. There was guilt and regret in his heart but behind his dead eyes, there was only hatred. 

Jac pushed open the creaking wooden door slowly. Her heart was beating fast and in the darkness she cursed herself for volunteering to go out to a shout on her first day.   
“Stupid, stupid. You don’t have to prove yourself,” she whispered. Jac could hear voices muttering excitedly from within the room but something held her back from entering. There had been shouts and screams but that had died away; it made Jac feel uneasy. Anything could have happened and there was no backup. “Pull yourself together,” Jac told herself as she remembered that paramedics were already inside, risking their lives and here she was, hanging back like a scared and lonely child.   
The door swung open at last and Jac was greeted by a scene even worse than she could have possibly imagined. Jeff and Dixie were crouched in a corner, cowering away from a woman with tattoos crawling up her fleshy forearms and in one hand she held a butcher’s knife; the metal of the blade glinted in what little light remained and blood dripped from it. Behind them, there were two naked bodies lying spreadeagled across a bloodstained floor. With a quick look, Jac could see that the first body, a young man no older than twenty, was dead. His insides were hanging out and his arteries had been torn apart by forceful slashes of the knife. Blood was still seeping out of him and soaking into the carpet and there was a tourniquet tied around his leg but that too was dark with his blood. Jac wrinkled her nose at the smell. The second body, a young teenage girl was similarly attacked, her face pale; Jac assumed that she too must be dead until she saw the girl’s chest shudder. Instinctively, Jac started to stride towards the struggling girl but the large woman holding Jeff and Dixie at bay let out a snarling sound which stopped Jac dead in her tracks. Jac had Hollie to think about, this was not the time for any stupid heroics.   
“Are you okay?” Jac mouthed at Jeff and Dixie.   
“Yes,” they mouthed back. Jac could see they were terrified but all she could think to do was smile encouragingly at them. It was a comfort that Jac did not realise.   
“What are you muttering about?” The woman growled and thrust the knife at them. She rounded on Jac: “You, get over there! Don’t be fucking slow! There now!” Jac hesitated, her mind panicked and she stood frozen to the spot. “Do you want me to rip your fucking throat out?” The woman marched over to Jac and grabbed her by the roots of her hair and physically threw her into the corner.   
“If I don’t get to that girl soon, she is going to bleed out and die,” Jac told Jeff and Dixie.   
“I know but if we move, she’ll attack us,” Jeff said, looking up at the grotesque figure of the woman.   
“Do we know her name?” Jac asked at a low murmur.   
“Yes, Alice,” Dixie whispered back at her. “I’ve already tried talking to her, it doesn’t work.” Jac bit her lip uncomfortably.  
“I’ve got to try something. I can’t do anything for him, but maybe I can save her life.”   
“We need backup,” hissed Jeff. “We can’t do anything like this and it’s stupid to risk our own lives.”   
“I’m a Doctor, I save lives,” Jac insisted.  
“Not at the expense of your own!” Jac looked from Jeff to Dixie and she knew deep down, that he was right. There was nothing they could do. Nothing except-  
Jac stood up; at once Alice yelled and pointed the knife straight at her heart but Jac was unperturbed. A newfound courage lay within her and she knew that she had to try something to diffuse the situation.   
“Alice? It is Alice yeah?” Jac asked, choosing her words carefully and slowly.   
“You can’t make this right,” Alice replied gruffly but there was a hint of pain in her voice as though some part of her regretted what she had done. Jac knew she had to take hold of this and twist it to her advantage.   
“Tell me what happened here?” Jac kept a watchful eye on the blade but she knew as long as she made no sudden movements, she was as safe as she could be. Alice stared over her shoulder at the carnage that lay behind. Her blue eyes were still full of a stressful anger and her temper teetered precariously on the brink of an explosion.   
“They had to be stopped,” Alice said at last. Jac gulped, her breathing was shallow as the fear of the situation began to squeeze her.   
“Why did they have to be stopped? What were they doing?”   
“I caught them at it.”   
“At what?” Jac pressed on, her voice firm but understanding. Alice didn’t seem to think much of this and her face flashed a new fury at Jac.  
“They were screwing each other! My own flesh and blood, going like fucking animals at each other!” Jac’s insides squirmed and she felt almost physically ill as the full depravity of the scene was laid out before her.   
“They were brother and sister?” Jac cringed as she said it and she felt Dixie shudder behind her. Alice roared and for a brief second it looked as if she would cut Jac’s throat there and then but something held her back and after a few tense minutes, she seemed to calm down.   
“Yes,” said Alice and she spat on the bloodied corpse of the man that had been her son.   
“I’m sorry,” Jac told her. “Do you know how long it had been going on for?” Alice shook her head.  
“I only found out today but I’d had my suspicions you know? Always sneaking out. Always spending time together. No one is that close all the time.”   
“There’s nothing we can do for-“ Jac paused and looked at Alice, hoping that she would give a name.   
“Timmy,” Alice replied and as she said his name, Jac saw her whole body convulse.   
“Timmy, but I can still save your daughter if you’ll let me?”   
“She needs to die,” Alice stated.  
“No, she doesn’t. You don’t mean that,” Jac said and she was willing Alice to see reason, to let her help. As each second past, time was running out and the situation grew tenser.   
“Evie,” Alice murmured.  
“I’m sorry?”   
“Evie. That’s her name. She was such a small baby. So different from Timmy.” Alice’s hands were shaking uncontrollably but she still held on to the knife tightly. The blade trembled.   
“Please, you have to let us do what we can for her.” Alice’s grip began to loosen. “You’ve already lost one child today, don’t let yourself lose both.”   
“I’ve already lost her,” Alice said and her voice cracked.   
“Don’t let her lose her life,” Jac insisted. “She’s still young, she can grow up to be anything she wants to be.” Alice’s face was streaming, mascara smudged and her eyes were red and blotchy. “She deserves to have a life to live.” As Jac stared into Alice’s eyes, she knew she had won. The knife fell from her hands and clattered onto the floor. Without a moment’s hesitation, Jeff reached out and kicked the knife away from her but Alice made no signs of wanting to hold it again. Jac was already kneeling beside Evie and examining the bloodied mess that were her injuries. Jac’s face was grave and she knew it was a long shot.   
“We’ve got to get her out of here!” Dixie shouted.  
“If we move her, she will die,” said Jac matter-of-factly. “I need to tie up the pulmonary artery.”   
“She’s running out of time,” Jeff hissed.   
“I know! If I don’t do this now, she is definitely going to die!” 

“So you’ve definitely got a slot free at four pm on Sunday?” Jonny asked, talking slowly and clearly into his mobile.   
“The only other one is at nine in the morning,” the lady replied in a broad Glaswegian accent.   
“No, four o’clock will be perfect,” Jonny decided. He felt sure that Jac would be thrilled with the venue.  
“Would you like me to book that for you sir?” asked the Glaswegian lady.   
“Yes, thank you.”  
“Let me just take down your details.” 

“Keep the pressure on that,” Jac instructed Dixie. “Don’t release it until I say.” Dixie nodded to show she understood. Alice watched on helplessly as Jac prepared. “Now!” Dixie released the pressure and Jac started to tie up the artery as fast as she could. It had been a long time since she’d had to work this fast but saving lives was a skill embedded in her that never really went away.   
“Wow, you are good,” Dixie said as she admired Jac’s handiwork. She laughed nervously. Jac just smiled, she was still pale from her mental tussle with Alice.   
“Right, we need to get her out of here and someone had better call the police,” Jeff determined.   
“Agreed,” said Jac. 

Jasmine heard a sudden metal clink echoing from the letterbox. It was too late to be post; she felt uneasy. The house was quiet as she marched down the hallway to the front door; there was a card stuffed unceremoniously into the letterbox. She wished Charlie would come home soon, she didn’t like being alone and although she knew the doors were all locked and the windows bolted, she couldn’t help being fearful of what lay outside.   
Jasmine reached for the card and took it. Her mouth fell open as she read the words inside and her eyes widened with shock. 

Dear Jas,   
Happy Birthday,  
Your loving father,  
xxx

Jasmine felt her fingers go numb and the card slipped from her grasp. She couldn’t believe he had found her. Her legs caved from under her and Jasmine fell sprawling to the floor. All she could see in her eyes were the words her father had scribbled into the card. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

PART TWENTY-THREE

Monday 12th January - 7 Days Until The Wedding

The card lay, torn in half, on the top of the bin and face down so that only the blank side was showing. Jasmine’s hands were tremblings and her fingernails sore from where she had biting them. Her face was pale and there were purple bags under eyes. The sun was rising low on the horizon and Jasmine realised she had been awake all night. She knew that if she slept, the nightmare would rear its ugly head once again and she did not think she could cope with seeing his face leering at her from deep in her subconscious. Her stomach rumbled and it occurred to her that she hadn’t had eaten anything since the previous morning; food had lost its appeal however and she did not move from where she was sitting.   
Jasmine kept a watchful eye on the window; a few times she had thought she’d caught sight of a shadow passing across the panes but when she blinked, there was nothing to be seen. Her eyes twitched and in her pocket, she felt a small vibration from her phone. For one brief moment of elation, Jasmine felt sure it would contain a message from Charlie but then she remembered, Charlie was still asleep upstairs and, in any case, they hardly texted much. Her heart was in her mouth as she unlocked the phone with her trembling fingers.   
The moment her eyes caught sight of the message, she felt the phone fall out of her hands and clatter with a soft thump onto the floor. She stared into space, dumbfounded and her mouth hanging open. It did not seem possible. How could he have possibly got hold of her new number? Jasmine shuddered; she felt sick to the stomach and her head ached from worry and lack of sleep. There was a second soft vibration and Jasmine knew he had sent her another message that would no doubt be as vile as the first one. A darkness drifted over her mind and she found herself thinking back to a time when she hadn’t been afraid of her own father; they seemed so very far away now. Underneath the fear, she couldn’t help feeling sorry for him and wondered if he would ever seek the help he needed. She shook her head; she knew her father and knew that he would never admit he needed help until he was seconds away from death. Jasmine felt a twinge of sadness in her heart; it had been a few months since the attack but it was still hard to come to terms with having lost her father that day as well. She hadn’t heard from her mother in weeks either and Jasmine assumed she was back in India without a care in the world, certainly they had parted on less than favourable terms the last time she visited.   
There was no point dwelling on it, Jasmine thought as she remembered the look of disgust on her mother’s face every time she had seen her with Charlie. It wasn’t her problem if her mother couldn’t deal with her daughter finally finding someone who could make her happy. There was nothing wrong with Charlie anyway, Jasmine considered with some degree of irritation. It wasn’t as if she forced her sexuality down everybody’s throats, Charlie was just Charlie. It made her laugh how Charlie would dye her hair a different colour every couple of weeks and no matter what anybody said, she would just fix them with a steely look and tell them to fuck off. Jasmine admired the confidence but at the same time she was glad to be a shier person.   
Her reminisces were brought sharply back to the present as the sound of shattering glass filled the air and a slip of paper wrapped around a large stone landed at her feet. Her heart plummeted so fast that she thought for one brief moment she would be sick. Her head rang from the piercing sound of breaking glass and she noticed a sharp pain in the back of her hand. As she looked down on it, Jasmine saw that a shard had pierced the skin and it was trickling blood over on to her wrist. She winced as she pulled the tiny shard out and applied pressure to the wound. The sound of hurrying footsteps trampling down the stairs filled her ears and Jasmine felt her spirits lift as high as they possibly could. She hadn’t dared to look at the scrap of paper that still lay wrapped around the stone.   
“What the hell?” Charlie said, her mouth hanging open in disbelief as she entered the room and her eyes surveyed the carnage that had once been the large window. Jasmine looked up at her and tried to answer but her voice came out as nothing more than a mousy squeak. Charlie knelt beside her, taking care not to step on any of the glass and wrapped part of her dressing gown around Jasmine’s trembling shoulders. “You’re shaking like mad Jas,” Charlie whispered softly and pulled Jasmine closer to her. Jasmine laid her head on her shoulder, her lips quivered and her knees shook so much that they knocked together heavily.   
“He found me,” Jasmine stuttered. “I don’t know how but he won’t leave me alone and I…” Her voice trailed off and Charlie stroked her hair soothingly.   
“So you’re saying he did this?” Jasmine nodded and then shook her head.   
“I don’t know,” she admitted. “I can’t think, I mean he was texting me just before it happened.” Charlie frowned.   
“How did he get your number?”   
“I don’t know!” Jasmine sounded shrill and her lips were quivering so much it was a wonder that she hadn’t already burst into floods of tears.   
“You need to go to the police Jas,” Charlie told her. There was force but it was with her usual air of compassion and understanding.   
“They won’t do anything,” Jasmine mumbled but as she took another look at the broken glass all around them and the scrap of paper, she knew that something had to be done. 

The café was small, beige and filled with round tables covered by a garish plastic cloth. Each one was occupied; some by couples and some by groups of friends as they shared a much needed breakfast. In the far left corner, Jac Naylor sat alone at her table; there was a mug of steaming coffee in front of her but she hadn’t taken more than a few sips from it. She yawned and covered her mouth with her left hand. Every so often, Jac would roll up her sleeve and look at her watch. This would be followed by a sharp intake of breath and concluded with a heavy sigh. She was waiting for someone and they were already pretty late. She stared at the coffee mug, watching as the steam rose off it and drifted up to the beamed ceiling of the café. It swirled around for a few moments before gently fading away into nothing.   
“Hi Naylor,” Jac cricked her neck as she turned and came face to face with Mo.  
“You’re late,” Jac replied by way of hello. Mo let out a small laugh as she pulled up a chair and sat opposite from Jac. “Are you going to order something?” Jac asked in what she hoped was a casual and noncommittal type of voice. Mo shook her head.  
“No, I can’t stay long,” she explained. “Elliot’s expecting me to assist him in an hour.” For a brief second a flash of anger passed across Jac’s face but it was too quick for Mo to notice and Jac quickly regained her composure.   
“Right, well I’d better get on with it then,” Jac shrugged. “Do you want to be my maid of honour?” A stunned silence followed these words as Mo just stared back at Jac, her mouth hanging open in shock. Jac twiddled her thumbs, waiting for the response. “Is there a reply coming or are you just going to sit there looking like a reject from Finding Nemo?” Jac asked once Mo’s continued staring had finally become too much for her. Mo blinked and shook her head. She breathed out heavily.   
“You’re asking me?” To her surprise, Mo found that her voice cracked slightly and was a little higher pitched than normal.   
“No, I actually just asked the eskimo on that table behind us,” Jac replied with a look of fatigued disdain at Mo.   
“There’s no eski-“ Mo stopped mid sentence and her mouth fell open again. “Well that’s not something you see every day.”   
“Technically he’s an Inuit,” Jac said matter-of-factly. “He told me,” she added when she caught the questioning look in Mo’s eyes. “Anyway, yes I did just ask you to be my maid of honour and if you keep staring at me like that, I am going to throw my coffee, my very hot coffee, in your face.” There was another pause and then, unable to keep a straight face, Jac burst into laughter. Mo smiled, shaking her head slowly.   
“I would love to,” Mo said at last. “Although aren’t you getting married on Sunday?”   
“Yes.”  
“In Scotland?”   
“Yes?”  
“So…aren’t you leaving it just a little bit late to start appointing bridesmaids?” Mo had her hands outstretched to illustrate her point.   
“I’ve got my bridesmaids sorted,” Jac explained. “I just needed a maid of honour and anyway, Jonny still hasn’t found a best man.”   
“You realise that just because he’s being even less organised than you doesn’t make you look better?”   
“Look is it going to be okay or not?” Jac spoke a little too quickly and so to appear patient, she offered Mo a tiny smile. Mo was used to Jac’s ways by now and nodded.   
“Yes, of course. Anything for you Naylor.” Jac smiled properly this time. “Just one question.” The smile slipped from her face. “Can I organise the hen night?”   
“I’m not having one.”  
“Yes you are.”  
“No, I’m not.”  
“Course you are.”  
“I’m really not.”   
“Don’t argue with me Naylor.”  
“I am arguing with you.”  
“Look, you’ve gotta have a hen night. It’s traditional. One last night to have fun with your friends.” Jac thought about this for all of two seconds.  
“Sounds awful.” Mo let out a noise that sounded like a cross between a squeal and an exasperated puppy.   
“Come on Naylor, you know you want to.” Jac did not reply, she merely stared at Mo and slowly rolled her eyes. “Come on, come on, come on.”  
“If I say yes, will you shut up?”   
“I guarantee it.”   
“Fine! You win, you can organise the hen night. Just nothing too outrageous okay?” Mo folded her arms, a broad grin spreading across her face. 

Jasmine strode out of the police station in a whirlwind of fury. Her face was blotchy and mascara streamed down her cheeks.   
“Wasting police time,” Jasmine muttered to herself. “I’LL GIVE YOU WASTING POLICE TIME!” She yelled the words back at the station but there was no reply save for the cawing of crows flying overhead. She took out her phone and dialled a number. “I need a taxi. Holby South to Holby City ED.” Jasmine hung up and sat down on the stone steps. She had barely sat down for five minutes when a taxi drove into view and parked close to her.   
“Taxi for Holby ED?” The driver asked, sticking his head out the window at her. Jasmine nodded. “Hop in.” 

“There’s someone waiting for you at reception,” Charlie told Jac as she took the stethoscope around her neck off and laid it on top of her locker. “Said her name was Jasmine?” Jac nodded at Charlie and ran out of the room, leaving Charlie to stare after her with a bemused expression etched across his features. “Must be important then.” 

Jac ushered Jasmine into the staffroom and the pair stood by the counter as Jac boiled the kettle.   
“Okay what’s going on,” Jac asked abruptly. Steam was beginning to billow from the kettle and they could hear the water bubbling from inside. Jac reached into the cupboard and drew out two mugs; she put three teaspoons of instant coffee into both.   
“It’s Si-, my dad.” Jac’s lips tightened but she did her best to remain calm; it was no use getting angry over Simon, that wouldn’t help Jasmine’s predicament. Jac listened as Jasmine explained everything that had happened; she interrupted at the right moments and she placed her arm around Jasmine’s shoulder when it was required.   
“I am going to kick him in his tiny balls,” Jac said through gritted teeth once Jasmine had finished her story. “And the police didn’t believe you?”   
“They said I was just being hysterical and that I had no proof he had anything to do with it.”   
“Surely that card would have turned a few heads?” Jac asked, frowning slightly. She took a sip of coffee.   
“It would if I still had it,” admitted Jasmine miserably. “I threw it away.” Jac took another sip of coffee. Her mind was whirring as she desperately tried to think of the best thing to say to Jasmine.   
“Look, I’m not going to pretend I know the right thing for you to do,” Jac began; her voice soft and considered. “But I just want you to know that whatever you decide, I am here for you and I always will be.” Jasmine burst into tears and threw her arms around Jac who patted her on her back slowly. “It’s going to be okay. Trust me, it's going to be all right.” They broke apart.  
“I should let you get back to it,” Jasmine said hoarsely. She dabbed at her eyes with a tissue and tried to wipe away the unmistakeable signs of mascara from her cheeks. “Charlie will be wondering where I’ve got to anyway.” She tried to laugh but there was no laughter left in her soul. Jac gave her one last embrace and watched as Jasmine hurried away. It wasn’t long before her body faded into a silhouette and moments later the silhouette faded away into nothing. Jac turned back to look at her coffee, it was still warm but Jac’s heart felt heavy and as she took another sip, it tasted like ashes in her stomach.   
“Difficult conversation?” Jac looked up as Charlie Fairhead entered. “Anyone drinking that?” He pointed at Jasmine’s still full mug of coffee. Jac shook her head.  
“You can have it,” she said quietly. Charlie had worked here for so long now and had watched so many colleagues try to deal with their problems on their own that he knew immediately when something was wrong.   
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked gently.   
“Talk about what?”  
“Whatever it is that’s bothering you.” 

Jasmine walked out of the ED. It was only half four but the light had already faded and a shroud of darkness had begun to descend over everything. She flinched at the shadows but, holding her head up high, she kept walking towards the nearest bus stop. There was a sudden fluttering of wings and Jasmine nearly jumped out of her skin as a pigeon flew past her. The speckled grey bird came close to striking her in the face but in a few seconds the whole event was over.   
“Hello Jas.” Simon appeared behind her and before Jasmine could scream, he covered her mouth with a sweaty hand. She could feel his putrid breath on her neck and her nostrils shrivelled at the smell of stale alcohol. She tried to wrench his hand away but he was too strong for her. “Did you really think you could escape me?” He hissed and Jasmine felt his grip tighten. “You’re just a stupid little whore.” Jasmine felt herself being led away from the road towards some steps that spiralled down into the underpass. Simon was completely drunk and his slurring became worse and worse as he bellowed at her. “You’re not getting away from me this time. A daughter belongs with her father!”   
Jasmine knew that no one would hear them, she was alone and as that thought struck her, she felt an anger rising from within. Her insides boiled and she thought of the advice that Jac had given her. With one deft move, Jasmine kicked Simon in the groin and he let out a high pitched squeal of pain. It was enough for him to loosen his grip and Jasmine wrenched herself away. She didn’t stop to look at him, she just ran as fast as she could. She could hear Simon running after her, panting like a wild dog.   
“You’re not going anywhere!” Simon screamed at her. “I’m going to-“ But Jasmine never heard what he was going to do because with a sudden scream of terror, Simon lost his balance and tumbled backwards, falling all the way down the stone steps. The scream stopped abruptly and a silence floated once more in the air. Jasmine’s heart was pounding as she walked back to the steps and stared at Simon’s crumpled body lying at the bottom.   
“What do I do?” Jasmine asked but she knew there would be no answer. She found herself walking gingerly down the steps towards where Simon lay, unmoving. There was a pool of blood around his head but he was still breathing shallowly. His eyes flickered open and for the first time, Jasmine saw that he was afraid. He was gasping for breath and did not seem to register that she was even there. “I need an ambulance,” Jasmine said into her phone, her voice trembling. Simon was in a bad way and no matter what man he had become, Jasmine knew that she did not want her father to die here. She wanted him to admit what he had done to her, to admit everything and to accept the consequences for his actions. Simon’s breathing grew weaker as Jasmine kneeled beside him and waited for the ambulance to arrive. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

PART TWENTY-FOUR

Tuesday 13th January - 6 Days Until The Wedding

Every time she closed her eyes, Jasmine could hear Simon’s scream and the terrible scraping sound he had made as he fell haphazardly down those steps. The crunch of his bones echoed around her skull making her heart beat faster and faster. As Jasmine focussed, she began to see the pool of dark red blood forming around the blunt wound in Simon’s skull. It began to congeal before her eyes and a dirty black scab seemed to close over the wound but blood continued to seep through a tiny gap at the side. Jasmine had started to drift into the unconscious realm when Jac walked into the room, hurriedly jamming her phone back into her pocket.   
“Wake up,” Jac told her bluntly but as Jasmine opened her eyes to look up at her older half-sister, she saw how Jac’s were twinkling with a sisterly kindness, yet she seemed to be distracted by something that Jasmine couldn’t quite put her finger on. “How long have you been sitting here?” Jasmine yawned and took a quick look around her surroundings; they were in the beige and clinical smelling relatives room.   
“I don’t know,” murmured Jasmine; her voice was hoarse as though it hadn’t been used for some time.   
“Do you want a coffee?” Jasmine shook her head.   
“I’m all right thanks, I just need to know-“ She paused mid sentence and gazed through the perspex glass in the door at the busy reception. She saw an old man with a fish hook sticking out of his left cheek trudge up to the desk and drip blood all over the clean counter. He spoke in a thick West Country accent but behind the closed door, all Jasmine could see was the man’s mouth open and close with no sound escaping from it. “How is he?” Jac sat down beside her and placed her arm around Jasmine’s shoulder.   
“He’s alive,” she replied but her voice was grim and seemed to be hiding something beneath the news she imparted. It did not fool Jasmine.   
“What aren’t you telling me?”   
“Nothing,” Jac lied but her hands were clenched and suddenly it was her heart racing rather than Jasmine’s.   
“Jac-“   
“It’s nothing,” Jac took her arm away and got up quickly; she began to pace around the room, biting her lip and making regular glances back at the door. To the untrained eye it appeared as if Jac felt she was being followed but by who or what, they would have no idea.   
“When did he wake up?” Jasmine didn’t know why she asked it; her mind was telling her how much simpler it would have been if Simon hadn’t woken up at all. She felt her chest rise and fall and at that moment she realised that she needed him to be okay. While he was alive, Jasmine could blame him for what he had done and there would still be a chance for him to be held accountable for his actions. Dead, and she knew she would never get the justice she deserved and without that justice, she would never be able to move on. Jasmine suddenly noticed that Jac had been staring at her all this time; her eyes were wide and fearful but she wasn’t afraid of Jasmine, she seemed to be staring right through her. “Jac, something’s happened hasn’t it?” To Jac, Jasmine’s voice was like a distant echo that hung hollowly around the room before dissipating into nothingness.   
“About an hour ago,” Jac replied, answering Jasmine’s previous question; she chose to ignore the enquiry into her life. Jasmine wasn’t giving up easily however and she strove to get the truth out of her sister, no matter what it took.   
“Tell me what happened.”   
“Nothing happened,” Jac whispered vaguely; Jasmine had never seen her sister seem so disillusioned with herself; it was as if something severed her very soul in two.   
“Jac, you’re not yourself. I’ve never seen you act this way before. You’re scaring me,” Jac arched an eyebrow at Jasmine.   
“He said some…things,” Jac told her slowly, her lips trembling as she spoke. All of a sudden their roles had been reversed and it was Jasmine who now took control, caring for her older and more experienced half sister. She leaned forward, sitting in her chair in the same way that she had seen so many psychiatrists in TV and film do.   
“What did he say?” Jasmine voice was calm, considered and precise but underneath her skin, her whole body was trembling and if anyone had cared to scratch beneath the surface, they would have seen that her control was nothing more than a front.   
“Just stuff,” Jac replied unhelpfully. It was obvious that Jac was unlikely to readily admit to anything, not without a little persuasion.   
“Such as?” Jasmine forced herself to speak calmly and without hesitation, to assume the feeling of control that laid upon her. “Did he try to get under your skin?” Jac’s entire body suddenly shook as though a cold wind had passed over her. “He got to you, didn’t he?”   
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Jac said, her arms were folded across her chest and her eyes blazed with a newfound defiance that told Jasmine she would have to assume a new tactic if she wanted to get anything out of the woman that stood before her.   
“Jac, you’ll feel better if you tell me,” Jasmine spoke succinctly and for a moment there was a flicker of doubt in Jac’s otherwise stoic expression. “Trust me.”   
“He told me something,” Jac began but she stopped suddenly and closed her mouth, leaving the room enveloped in a long held silence once again.   
“What did he tell you?” Jasmine’s question was like a silver knife that cut through an invisible string between them.   
“Just stuff, stuff that I didn’t want to hear,” Jac muttered.   
“You can trust me,” Jasmine told her quietly.  
“I know,” replied Jac, her body twitching delicately. 

Earlier

The breathing apparatus rose up and down, softly whirring and hissing beside Simon’s bed on ITU. His eyes were fixed firmly shut and there were tubes attached all over him; a drip fed a steady solution of saline into his body. His head was wrapped in a blood-soaked bandage and fresh new blood was beginning to seep from underneath. The doors behind him opened and Jac Naylor strode onto the ward. Strictly speaking she wasn’t meant to be there and if anyone discovered her family’s personal relationship with Simon, she knew that there would be hell to pay. Jac sighed and tied her hair up into a bun; she was dressed in turquoise coloured scrubs and wore a black stethoscope around her neck.   
Jac hated ITU. No matter what anyone tried to say, it always felt like the final stop between life and death, a physical embodiment of ‘God’s Waiting Room’ if you were inclined to believe such things. More often than not, ITU was bathed in a hollow darkness that did little to lift the feeling of isolation and gloom that hung over it. Jac flicked on the light switch and waited with her arms tightly folded for the room to be illuminated by the feeble power of energy-saving lightbulbs. It took just over a minute for the command to reach the bulbs and they duly began to burn dimly. She looked across at the other beds and saw that they were unoccupied; Simon was the only resident for the time being but he was still in a coma and was unlikely to be much company. Not that it was his company, Jac had come here for. She had questions and Simon was the one who held the answers. She stared down at his feeble and damaged body; he was frail, gaunt and almost completely emaciated; it was hard to believe that he could be capable of anything. Jac could spot the telltale signs of liver cirrhosis and she wondered if it was already too late for him. No one would know if she just turned off all the machines that were keeping him alive; he could just slip away. No one would ever question that. Why would they? After all, Simon was a critically ill patient liable to pass away at any moment and nobody seriously expected him to recover. Jac gripped at the railing of the bed. Even if he did come through this, it was unlikely he would live for many more months, perhaps only weeks remained for him.   
“No,” Jac murmured to herself. “Don’t let your personal feelings get in the way.” She let go of the railing and was about to turn away when a low whisper drifted through the air towards her.   
“Jacqueline.” Simon’s voice was faint and almost inaudible, his throat hoarse and the sound of rasping air trying to escape gave the impression of a man overcome by his own failing health. Jac froze. “Jacqueline,” Simon wheezed again. “I know it’s you.” Jac screwed up her eyes; she had come here for answers but now when the moment had come, she found that she did not want to even look at him. Hatred was bubbling insider her and she knew that it could explode at any moment.   
“Back with us then,” Jac replied, still not looking at him.   
“No thanks to my sodding daughter,” Simon grimaced as pain rocked his body but he forced his lips into a cruel smile as Jac turned to look at him at last.   
“And what exactly were you doing?” Jac hissed. “No, don’t answer. I don’t want to hear your lies. Jasmine’s told me everything.” Simon grabbed her hand before she could stop him, his unkempt nails digging into her skin.  
“And you believed her?” His breath still stank of stale alcohol.   
“She has no reason to lie,” said Jac through gritted teeth; she tried to wrench her hand away but Simon’s grip had a hidden strength that she had not counted on.   
“She has every reason!” Simon hissed at her. “Every reason to discredit me!” Jac looked down on him with a mixture of disgust and pity for the wretched creature he had become.   
“Why would she want to discredit her own father?” Jac asked; she was curious to see what levels he would stoop to next.   
“She was never a happy child, never contented. Nothing I gave her was ever enough!”   
“So you raped her,” Jac’s eyes had deadened and for one brief second Simon recoiled from her. “Do you even realise how depraved that is?” There was no response. “Your own daughter!”   
“She asked for it.” Jac rounded on him, a fire blazing in her eyes that no one had ever seen there before. She seethed with rage and towered over the pathetic Simon as he lay helpless in the hospital bed.   
“No one asks for it!” Jac snapped. “You are a vile, disgusting little wretch!” Her whole chest rose in time with her angered breathing. “Jasmine is one of the sweetest people I have ever met, she deserves better than you for a father.” She fell silent, allowing her words to sink in.   
“Oh please,” Simon said at last. “You didn’t even like the girl before.” Jac forced herself to remain calm but it was evident that he struck a painful chord with her.   
“That was different,” she whispered.  
“How so?” Simon hissed.  
“It wasn't Jasmine I hated,” Jac began quietly. “It was where she came from.” Simon began to laugh; it was a hollow laugh, bereft of everything that a laugh should be. He released her hand and Jac could see all the tiny marks where his fingernails had broken her skin. Her hand stung but Jac was numb to the pain.   
“This is about your mother,” Simon said once he had finished laughing. “Oh this is brilliant, absolutely perfect.” He dissolved into another fit of low-pitched giggling.   
“You don’t talk to me about her, ever. Do you understand me?”   
“Paula’s a bit of all right when you get to know her,” Simon answered, ignoring her. Jac could feel her hands clenching into fists. “In fact she’s actually very easy-“  
“Shut up!”   
“Ooh touched a nerve have I? I didn’t know you cared.”   
“I don’t,” Jac said softly. Simon grinned at her, baring his yellowed teeth.   
"You know what she said to me when she-“  
“When she what?”   
“When she got that kidney out of you?” A wave of fear suddenly washed over Jac.   
“How did you?” Simon put a finger to his lips and made a shushing noise. He beckoned her closer and against all her better judgement, Jac found herself being drawn towards him.   
“She said, and this is the god’s honest truth,” Simon paused and smiled at the effect his words were having on Jac. “She said that now that she had a piece of you sown up inside her, she could finally realise how dead you are on the inside. Your kidney was nothing more than a piece of meat, soulless and warped. Just like you.”   
“You’re lying,” Jac murmured but she was visibly shaken and her hands had broken out into a cold sweat.   
“Why would I lie to you?”   
“Why should I believe you?”   
“Ask her.” Jac trembled yet she didn’t know if she felt angry or whether she was just upset. His words had got under her skin and she was furious with herself for allowing that to happen. She forced herself to regain some composure, even if it was just a little. A little was all she needed but there was no time left for fun and games. Standing in ITU had brought back memories of when she had been the resident guest here; it felt like such a long time ago but at the same time, it seemed only yesterday that Jac had been lying in the very same bed that Simon now occupied. She stared down at him and she knew the question she had to ask.   
“Do you remember when it was me lying here?” Simon frowned; he hadn’t been expecting this.   
“I remember what Jas told me.” Jac wasn’t sure how she was going to tackle this; she knew what she wanted to ask but the words would not form in her mouth and a part of her was afraid of what the answer might be. She clenched her eyes and decided that it was now or never.   
“Was it you?” Simon was silent. He stared at her through his cold, dead eyes as though he was quietly calculating. “I need to know,” whispered Jac.   
“Yes,” Simon said at last. Jac felt herself go numb, the whole room was spinning above her head and she was powerless to stop herself from falling. Simon’s laughter filled the air and seemed to echo unpleasantly. 

Present

“Jac?” Jasmine’s voice seemed to float far away from her. “Jac are you okay?” There was no reply; Jac just stood in a dazed silence as though the weight of the world lay on her shoulders. “Jac, please talk to me,” Jasmine sounded desperate, almost pleading with her.   
“I’ve got to go,” Jac said suddenly and without waiting for Jasmine to say anything, Jac strode out of the relatives room. Jasmine wanted to follow her but something held her back and she remained fixed to where she was sitting. There was an eerie silence save for the incessant ticking of the clock; the sound seemed to bore itself into Jasmine’s skull until she found that could not concentrate or think. She looked around and saw that Jac had left her phone on the seat opposite her. It must have fallen out of her pocket, Jasmine thought as she picked up the phone and stared at it. 

Simon’s voice was running through her mind as Jac pulled the helmet over her head and climbed on to her motorbike. Her limbs shook as she fumbled with the keys until the engine roared to life and a cloud of grey smoke shot out of the exhaust.   
“Jac!” Jac turned to see Sacha jogging towards her, his forehead shining with sweat and his cheeks a rosy red.   
“What do you want?” Jac shot back at him, snapping more than she had intended. “Sorry,” she muttered. Sacha shook his head, to indicate that he wasn’t bothered.   
“Are you okay, you look shaken up?” Jac knew that Sacha was only trying to help but she didn’t have time for his gentle understanding and the inevitable way in which he would make her feel better.   
“Sacha, I don’t have time to talk. There’s something I have to do.” Sacha took a step back as Jac revved the engine on her bike.   
“I won’t get in your way,” Sacha told her. “Just be careful, please.”  
“Sacha, I really I have to go!”   
“Okay,” Sacha stepped out of the way and watched as Jac sped away from him. He kept until watching until her silhouette was nothing more than a distant speck on the horizon. 

Jac raced through the busy and winding roads of Holby; she knew where she was going but she didn’t know why she was going or what she expected to find when she got there. There was no reason to trust Simon’s words but at the same time there had been no reason for him to lie. Jac didn’t know what to think; everything was so messed up and confused inside her head. She guided her bike around a sharp corner and continued to race; breaking the speed limit. Simon’s voice echoed in her mind; she felt cold, clammy as though his hand was still gripping hers. The memory of what he had done to her, what he had done to Jasmine and the lack of remorse he shown for any of it, was slowly but surely haunting and eating away at her. Her hands shook on the handlebars as she swerved her bike down along a side road. 

“Did you see Jac?” Jasmine was panicking as she grabbed at Sacha’s thick arm. “Where did she go?” Sacha was flustered and he couldn’t get a word in edgeways as Jasmine continued to bombard with him questions. “Didn’t you try to stop her?”   
“Calm down. What’s the matter?” Sacha was kindly but Jasmine would not calm down. She hopped agitatedly on her feet and seemed to be desperate to show him something. Sacha looked down at the phone in Jasmine’s outstretched hand. “That’s-“  
“I know,” Jasmine said quickly; she was almost out of breath by this stage. “She left it behind, but that’s not the point.”   
“What are you getting at?”   
“Just look at the last message!” Jasmine raised her voice a little louder than she had hoped and she smiled apologetically at Sacha.   
“I don’t think we should be prying-“ Sacha began but Jasmine groaned and pressed the home button on the phone so that the screen suddenly lit up. Sacha saw the name on the screen and in that moment, he understood. “Paula.”   
“I’m really scared she’s gonna do something stupid,” Jasmine pleaded. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

PART TWENTY-FIVE

Ice-cold wind lashed at Jac’s face as she guided her motorbike down lane after lane; her cheeks were bright red and felt sore to the touch. It had started to rain heavily; tremendous globules of water splattered all over her helmet and showered her until she was drenched from head to foot. None of this seemed to faze her, however as her mind was focussed on only one thing and nothing would stop her. She was drawing closer to her destination and she kept the bike going at full pelt. The wind grew stronger and as she turned on to the next lane, she found herself riding into the gusts so that they blew the freezing rain directly into her face; her visor began to cloud up and Jac knew she would have to slow down but her mind was determined.   
Jac’s heart skipped a beat; the back wheel of her bike had suddenly skidded so violently that a lesser-skilled rider would surely have been thrown over the top. She let out a deep breath and carried on. She brought the bike to a slower pace and turned it inward up a small country path that led to a small cottage.   
The walls of the cottage were enveloped in a dark green moss and pale ivy had snaked its way up the corners and wrapped around the chimney in a tight hug. Jac brought her bike to a halt and propped it up with the stand. She climbed down from the sodden seat; a sigh of relief escaped from her as she removed the heavy helmet and let her hair down. Her hair was the only part of her that was still even vaguely dry and as she stepped across the gravel, she felt her legs begin to shake and her lips tremble uncontrollably.   
Now that she was closer to the cottage, Jac could make out the faint signs of faded yellow paint that lurked beneath the layerings of moss. A battered wooden sign was nailed above the front door and read, in dark grey letters: Beaver Burrow   
“She would choose to live here,” Jac muttered to herself. She tutted and brought her hand up to the brass knocker. Jac swallowed a great gulp of air and rapped the knocker on the door three times.   
“All right, I’m coming!” The unmistakable sound of Paula Burrows voice drifted from inside the cottage and Jac could hear her mother scrambling to the front door. Jac waited on the doorstep with her arms folded; the rain had eased off at last but the wind was still biting and gnawing at every inch of her that was exposed.   
“Jacqueline,” said Paula as she opened the door and stared into Jac’s narrowed eyes. Paula did not seem to be surprised by her daughter’s presence as Jac traipsed into the hallway and dragged wet mud and gravel over the doormat. Paula examined the bedraggled state of her daughter and stared out at where Jac had parked her bike. “You didn’t ride all the way here did you?” Her voice was a mixture of exasperation and a quiet impress.   
“What of it?” Jac asked, irritated. Paula smiled sweetly, unnerving Jac as she was led down the hallway into the kitchen.   
“Just hang your jacket on the back of that chair,” Paula pointed to a wooden chair at the far end of the table.   
“I’m not stopping long,” replied Jac, refusing to unzip the jacket.   
“Suit yourself,” Paula murmured and for a moment she appeared to have returned to type but when she looked up at Jac again it was with the same sickeningly sweet smile she had used in the hallway. “So what can I do for you then Jackie?”   
“I need the truth,” replied Jac and Paula could see the sheer determination edged across her daughter’s features. Paula frowned.  
“What truth?”   
“About Simon.” Paula froze and for a brief second, a cloud of doubt passed over her face; Jac knew that she caught her mother off guard. It wasn't long, however for Paula to regain her composure and fix Jac with an icy stare. Jac flinched; it was only the stare of her mother that had any affect on her. Anyone else and Jac would just laugh it off or retaliate with a carefully chosen, but often bitchy, comment. Paula knew just the effect her single stare could have and she used it to her full advantage.   
“What about him?” Paula’s voice was no longer honeyed; it cut through the air between them and suggested in no uncertain terms that Paula would be unwilling to impart any more information than was necessary. Jac opened her mouth to speak but no sound came out. She ran her hand through her hair and she could feel the prickles springing up all over her face; her legs were twitching and she wasn’t able to form the right words. “I haven’t got all day Jac,” Paula told her as though she was speaking to a young girl and suddenly Jac felt twelve years old again. Paula seemed to tower over Jac as her daughter cowered away, trembling with a childlike fear.   
She wasn’t in this room anymore; Jac opened her eyes. She was standing in a dark, dingy kitchen; the light had died but Jac could make out her younger self sitting at the table. Her legs didn’t seem to reach the floor; they hung uselessly in the air, thin and pale. She wore navy blue socks, plain and unassuming. This was a Jac who had had her whole identity stripped away from her. As Jac stared at her, she saw that she had buried her head in her hands and was sobbing quietly. Her auburn hair flowed down to her shoulders but it was unkempt as though it hadn’t been brushed for some time. Jac’s footsteps echoed as she stepped towards her younger self; to her surprise, the younger Jac lifted her head up and stared back at her through tearstained eyes.   
“Have you come to take me away?” The younger Jac’s voice was high-pitched and broken by the loud sniffles of her nose. Jac’s heart burned in her chest as she pulled up a chair beside the girl and sat down.   
“Take you away?” Jac asked. The girl nodded and fresh new tears rolled down her cheek.   
“Because I’m all alone,” she answered. “I’m not allowed to be on my own.” Jac reached out and took hold of her hand; it seemed odd that she could touch it at all, this was only a memory.   
“Who’s looking after you?”   
“My mother,” said the girl but she sounded unsure; Jac looked around the kitchen. She peered at the piles of dirty crockery sticking out of the sink and the stains of food on the table. “She said she wouldn’t be long,” the girl said as she spotted Jac frowning at the overflowing bin in the corner.   
“How long have you been left here?”   
“She only went to town, she’ll be coming back soon,” she sounded so sure of her words that Jac felt the return of a pang in her heart; a pain she had dealt with a long time ago.   
“When did she go?” Jac knew the answers to all her questions but it was still hard to hear the words spoken as if she were nothing more than a stranger.   
“I don’t know. Where’s my mum?” Jac didn’t answer, there wasn’t any answer she could give. “Why’s she just left me here?” The girl was pleading but there was nothing Jac could do; she had never felt so helpless. “Doesn’t she want me?” Jac wanted to break down and cry with the girl but she couldn’t, she had to be the one who held it all together just as she had done so many times.  
“I don’t know,” said Jac softly. “I wish I had the answers for you but I don’t.” She struggled to keep her voice steady but the girl could hear the tiny cracks that unravelled everything.   
“Please don’t cry,” she said. “Adults aren’t supposed to cry.”   
“Adults cry,” Jac told her. “We just try to keep it hidden from our children.”  
“Why?”  
“We don’t want you to see behind closed doors.”  
“But I don’t understand.”  
“Adults are supposed to be strong, we’re supposed to know what to do. We’re meant to have the answers, we’re meant to be there when you need us but that’s not the truth of it.” The girl wiped away her tears; she was looking at Jac with the curious interest of a child now.   
“What is the truth?”  
“We make mistakes, we choose the wrong things. We try to do our best and sometimes doing our best means hurting our children but it doesn’t mean we love you any less. Being an adult is hard, the weight of so much expectation and sometimes we crack under the pressure. Sometimes we can’t put it all right because the pieces don’t fit together in the same way any more. Your mother loves you, she just wasn’t strong enough to stay. You’ll see her again one day and I’m sorry, I’m really really sorry, it’s going to hurt worse than any pain you’ve ever experienced. Just promise me one thing.”  
“What?”  
“Never give up. Hide the tears and the pain.”   
“I promise.”   
“And remember, you won’t be alone forever. It’s not going to be easy but you’re going to grow up and you’ll be the best surgeon in the country. I promise, you will change so many lives, so many people will live because of you. That’s the truth. Never stop believing that you can change the world.” The girl squeezed Jac’s hand but the next second she seemed to fade away and Jac felt her head spinning as she was thrust back into the kitchen where her mother glared menacingly at her.   
“Pull yourself together,” Jac snapped at herself.   
“You zoned out for a second,” Paula said and if Jac had dared to hope, there was the tiniest indication of concern in her mother’s voice.   
“Just a memory,” answered Jac. “Nothing important.” Paula knew her daughter well enough to know when she was lying but there was no reason to press the point. Jac hadn’t come here to discuss memories.   
“You wanted to know about Simon,” she said after a long pause.   
“He told me something, something about you,” replied Jac but she was uncertain and her insides had knotted up because there was a part of her that didn’t want to know the truth. Sometimes it was better to live in ignorance.   
“About me?” Jac thought about it for a moment and she began to walk towards the door. “Jac, what is it?” Paula’s voice was distant.   
“It doesn’t matter.”   
“Talk to me Jac.”   
“Just forget it.” Jac gave one last look back at her mother’s worried face and smiled faintly. Ignorance was bliss, Jac thought as she walked down the hallway and stepped out into the frozen air. Something cold and wet landed on her cheek and Jac glanced up into the sky; it was snowing. 

Jasmine knocked on the door and waited for Jonny to answer. Sacha stood behind her, holding an umbrella up so that the snow was deflected away. There were lights on inside; evidently someone was at home. Jasmine hoped that Jac would answer and all her fears would have been for nothing. She brought her hand up to knock again but the handle turned and pulled the door open inwardly. Jasmine’s heart sank. It was Jonny who stood in the doorway. He smiled when he saw them and beckoned them inside.   
“What can I do for you?” They were ushered into the kitchen; Jonny had kept it spotless and Jasmine saw how the crockery sparkled and shone in the rack where it had been left to dry. “Were you looking for Jac, she’s not here at the moment,” Jonny looked up at the clock and his features curled into a slight frown. Jasmine stepped forward awkwardly and offered Jac’s phone for Jonny to take.   
“She left it behind,” Jasmine explained as Jonny shot her a confused look.   
“You were in the ED?”   
“Only briefly,” Jasmine lied; she didn’t feel now was the best time to explain exactly why she had been there. “There’s something else.” Jonny recognised the anxiety in her voice and the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. He looked from Jasmine to Sacha who stood with his back against the wall, his fingers twirling around the handle of his umbrella absentmindedly.   
“What’s going on?” Jonny forced himself to remain calm but already a creeping fear was edging itself up inside him. “Where’s Jac?” Jasmine opened her mouth but it was Sacha who answered as he stepped out from the shadows.   
“We don’t know,” he said; he sounded solemn and there was no reassuring smile to ease Jonny’s worries. 

The snow was falling heavily now and Jac could make out the telltale signs of black ice forming over the roads. She urged her bike around a particularly dangerous looking patch and sped down the lane; she was nearly onto the main road and from there it was a straight stretch for most of the way home. None of the snow appeared to be settling; the ground was probably too wet, Jac thought. It was bitterly cold, however and Jac was desperate to get home. She had other reasons as well, not least because she hadn’t seen Hollie since the early hours of the morning. She pushed the bike on and her speed started to increase. Everything faded to black.   
“You told me everything would be all right!” Jac looked around for the source of the voice but the room was pitch black except for the tiny illumination of a bedside lamp. A 15-year old girl was sitting on the edge of her bed, her green eyes ablaze with a fearsome fury. Realisation dawned on Jac as she realised who the girl was. The teenage Jac’s hair was brighter in colour than Jac’s and shorter. Jac drew closer to the girl and she saw that her arms were covered in cigarette burns.   
“I said it would take time,” Jac whispered and her eyes drifted away from the burn marks; she could not bare to be reminded of them.   
“Nobody wants me,” the teenage Jac whispered back at her. “I’m always the last one left in the cold.” Jac remembered how she had felt on that day and she thought about the indignity of being shoved from one foster family to the next. She never stayed in one place for long and was often put straight back into care. “I don’t want to stay here.”  
“Why?”  
“I don’t belong here.”   
“You’ll belong if you want to,” Jac told her but the girl just scowled and looked away.   
“Nobody wants me,” she said again. “Nobody cares.” Jac glanced at the biology textbook propped open on the bedside table.   
“What are you studying?”   
“Cells,” replied the girl. Jac smiled.   
“Enjoying it?”   
“It’s all right I guess.” She leant over and slammed the book shut. “I’m being moved tomorrow.” Jac was silent as she looked around the cream-coloured walls of the bedroom; they were bare and showed little sign that anyone lived here. “They said I had to go, that they couldn’t cope with me any more.”  
“Did they tell you why?”  
“Because of what I did.” The girl pointed at the marks on her arms. “I just wanted to make the pain stop.”   
“But it never does,” murmured Jac. The girl nodded.   
“So I’m being sent back, back to be with all the other children that nobody wants.”   
“It won’t be for long,” Jac told her. “Trust me.”   
“I had a fight.” A light seemed to switch itself on in the back of Jac’s mind; she remembered the girl she had fought with, it all seemed so inconsequential now. “She said my mother left me because I’m a freak.”   
“You shouldn’t listen to what other people think.”   
“It’s true though, isn’t it?”   
“She had her reasons for leaving,” that was all Jac could tell her; she still didn’t know what her mother’s reasons had been.   
“I know it was because of me.”   
“Stop thinking like that,” Jac said firmly. “Self-pity gets you nowhere. It’s a cruel, hard world and the only one who’ll protect you, is you.”   
“I shouldn’t have hit her.”  
“Mistakes are just a part of growing up. We learn from them and we move on.”   
“What do I do now?” The girl looked up at Jac; her eyes betraying the terror that lay behind them.   
“You have to belong.”  
“But I d-“  
“You have to try.”

“I’m calling the police,” Jonny was frantic but as he reached into his pocket, Jasmine knocked his hand away.   
“Not yet, give her some more time,” she implored. Jonny looked at her doubtfully but then he nodded. Sacha brought over a mug of fresh tea and placed it down in front of him.   
“She’ll turn up,” said Sacha with a glint of his familiar optimism. “I know Jac, she probably just had some stuff to work through.”   
“But her mother-“   
“Trust me, Jac’s stronger than we think.” Sacha and Jasmine exchanged dark looks but they were both focussed on preventing Jonny from panicking.   
“I bet she’ll walk through that front door any minute now and wonder what we’re all doing in here,” Jasmine reassured Jonny. He took a sip of tea and sat back in the chair; his shoulders relaxed and he seemed to breathe normally again.  
“Of course you’re right. There’s no need to get worked up.” He didn’t sound entirely sure, however but there was really nothing that he could do. The kitchen fell silent as they waited. Time seemed to tick by so slowly now and a couple of times Jonny had looked up at the clock, he could have sworn that it had somehow gone backwards. 

It was nearly 10 o’clock when Jac finally returned home. She opened the front door, placed her helmet on the table and was about to hang up her jacket when Jonny came racing into the hall and threw his arms around her. There were so many questions he wanted to ask her but as he felt her warmth against his, all thought of them had faded from his mind.   
“I’m okay,” Jac told him when they had finally broken apart. Jonny looked up at her; he could see that she really wasn’t okay at all but he knew that Jac would talk when she was ready.   
“Sacha and Jasmine are here-“ Jonny began but he saw that there was no reason to explain; they were both standing behind him.   
“We were just leaving,” Sacha said. “Come here.” Sacha embraced Jac. She didn’t need to say anything, her eyes told a hundred stories and as she watched Sacha and Jasmine close the door behind them, Jac thought back to her childhood and a sudden realisation struck her. She’d survived.   
“She’s asleep,” Jonny said when Jac turned her gaze on him.   
“I’ll just check on her.”

Jac pushed open the door to Hollie’s bedroom and stepped quietly inside. She stared down at the sleeping face of her daughter and her cheeks blushed with pride. For a few moments, Jac was silent as she watched; there were no words that could convey what she felt. She could feel Hollie’s breathing and hear the beating of her heart.   
“I’ll always be here for you,” whispered Jac delicately. There was a scuffled movement behind her and she turned to see Jonny standing in the doorway. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

PART TWENTY-SIX

Wednesday 14th January - 5 Days Until The Wedding 

“Nurse!” Simon’s voice echoed around the darkened Keller Ward. “I need a nurse now!” Due to the apparent improvement in his condition, Simon had been moved from ITU to a free bed on Keller. He was still under constant observation but the latest ECGs and blood tests had come back clear. Clear that is, apart from the conditions that were already recorded in his notes. The colour had started to return to his gaunt face but there was a yellow tinge around the edges of his skin and a pungent smell had arisen from days of not washing. “Oi nurse!” Simon grated his teeth together with irritation as he watched a nurse leave the ward at the other end from where he lay. It was possible she hadn’t heard him, Simon thought but the brief moment of fairness was eclipsed by a sudden spasm of pain through his right thigh. After a minute of whispered cussing, he was about to lay his head back down to sleep when out of the corner of his eye, he spotted another nurse walking on to the ward with her head held high and her hair done up into a tight bun. She was dressed in dark green scrubs and by the faint light given off at the nurse’s station, Simon could just about make out the severe glint in her eyes. Simon watched her in silence for a moment; she was buried in paperwork but every few minutes she would glance up and scan the ward. When another few minutes of this had passed, Simon seized his chance and called out to her. “Nurse!” He took care to make his voice loud and clear so that she would have no trouble hearing his pleas. There was a murmur of dissent from the neighbouring beds; no doubt rudely awakened from the depths of their sleep.   
The nurse shuffled her paperwork into a neat pile and laid it on top of a selection of tightly packed folders. She glanced over in the direction of Simon’s calls and began to walk towards his bed; her footsteps echoed across the hard floor.   
“What can I do for you, Mr-“ the nurse paused and looked up at the name beside the bed. “Mr. Burrows?” Simon took a deep breath.  
“It’s my leg nurse, it’s killin’ me.” The nurse frowned.   
“Would you mind if I examined you?” Simon consented.  
“Does it hurt here?” The nurse asked as she felt her way up Simon’s leg. Each time she asked, he would shake his head and say:  
“Further up.” She had nearly reached the top of his thighs and was about to stop when Simon suddenly winced.   
“There,” he said, gritting his teeth to bare the pain. “Look do you know what you’re doin’?” She did not answer him but continued to examine his right thigh. “You’re not some junior they’ve left in charge are you?” She fixed him with an icy stare and drew herself up to her full, but underwhelming height.   
“I am the Chief Nursing Officer, Karen Bradbury,” Karen glared down at Simon as he mumbled an apology.   
“So you’re like in charge of everything?”   
“I’m in charge of all nursing facilities, yes.”   
“That’s pretty high up then.”   
“Indeed,” said Karen, taking a look at the clipboard attached to the foot of the bed. “It says here you were admitted following a fall on Monday, is that correct?”  
“Yes,” replied Simon.   
“And you were taken here from ITU this afternoon?”   
“That’s correct.” Karen nodded and scribbled a note on the clipboard.   
“How long has the leg been causing you pain?”  
“It started this evening, I thought it would pass but it’s just gettin’ worse an’ worse.” Karen scribbled another note and took a careful look at Simon; her eyes taking in every detail.   
“I’ll prescribe you some more painkillers,” she said after careful consideration. “But the best thing you can do, Mr. Burrows, is try to get some rest.” Simon nodded. “And please remember there are other patients.” Karen turned on her heels and strode back to the nurses station where she buried her head back into her paperwork. 

Thursday 15th January - 4 Days Until The Wedding

“Have you got everything packed?” Jonny’s voice called out to Jac from the bottom of the stairs. The entire house was in chaos as they tried desperately to get everything ready for the journey to Scotland the next day. The wedding was fast approaching, the rehearsal was on Saturday afternoon and they still had to contend with what Mo had organised for Jac’s hen night that very evening. To top it all, Jonny still hadn’t managed to find a best man and had organised most of the wedding himself. He’d initially asked Elliot but the cardiothoracic consultant had been struck down by a particularly nasty bout of flu and there were concerns over whether he would be able to make the wedding at all.   
“I’m nearly there,” Jac shouted back down to him. She looked over her shoulder at the empty suitcase by their bed and the pile of clothes scattered haphazardly all over the sheets.   
“You haven’t packed anything have you?” Jonny had to laugh, Jac was the most organised person in the world when it came to her patients, but her own life was chaotic.   
“Well what am I supposed to take?”   
“Enough clothes for three nights and whatever you want!” Jac bent down and scooped a pile of clothes into her arms and, folding them neatly, she placed them one by one in to the suitcase. “Don’t forget Hollie’s things!”   
“I’ve never had to organise myself for my own wedding before,” Jac shouted over the din of the coffee grinder.   
“I know,” Jonny muttered under his breath as he poured the boiling water into the coffee pot and pressed down on the filter. There was a sniffling from the table behind him and Jonny turned to see Hollie pointing at the coffee with tiny fingers from her highchair. “No that’s not for you darling,” Jonny laughed. “Like mother, like daughter.”   
“Jonny!” Jac called out as Jonny walked back into the hall, holding a mug of coffee in his hand.   
“I made you some coffee,” he replied, walking up the stairs in order to hand the mug over to her.   
“Thanks,” Jac said, taking the mug from him and allowing the smell of fresh coffee to waft through her nostrils. “Listen, I know Elliot’s still sick, so have you managed to find a best man yet?” Jonny scratched his head, thinking.  
“I don’t know who to ask,” he admitted. Jac took a sip of coffee, her features lined in concentration as she pondered a response.   
“What about Ethan?” She took another sip of coffee before continuing. “You both get on quite well.”  
“True,” Jonny said doubtfully.  
“And he and his brother are both coming to the wedding anyway.”   
“I know,” replied Jonny. “Jac, I’m not sure about this, I mean, do you think Ethan would accept?”   
“Why don’t you ask him?” Jonny shrugged.  
“I’ll see him at work today anyway, maybe I could ask him for you?” Jonny looked at Jac in surprise.  
“I thought you weren’t going in today?” Jac sighed, she had got used to this kind of response from Jonny. He always panicked unnecessarily whenever they had to be somewhere. It was slightly endearing though, Jac thought with a sly smile to herself.   
“Connie called me earlier, Ash’s been called to a meeting so they need a consultant for a couple of hours to cover him.”   
“Couldn’t they find anyone else?”   
“They tried but everybody else is either busy or sick. This time of year is a nightmare.”   
“What about your dress fitting?” Jac took hold of Jonny’s hand.  
“Everything is under control, stop worrying okay?” Jonny squeezed her hand; he attempted to smile.  
“I just want everything to be perfect.” Jac leaned across and kissed him.  
“I know.” 

 

Sacha’s brow was furrowed as his eyes cascaded the pile of unopened brown envelopes over his desk. The only light was a small candle to the side of him; it had dripped hot wax on to the polished wooden surface but that was the least of Sacha’s worries. Something started to lick his hand and Sacha looked down to see his labrador puppy sitting beside him, wagging her tail.   
“It must be nice not having anything to worry about,” Sacha murmured, stroking the dog’s back gently. “All you care about is having a warm place to sleep and plenty of food.” He exhaled deeply and his shoulders slouched. The puppy continued to lick his hand; Sacha knew she was staying close to him because she could sense that all was not well. Sacha picked up one of the envelopes and slit it open with his thumb under the seal. “Dear Mr. Levy,” Sacha read out loud as his eyes wandered down the letter. It was the same old story, a final demand, another bill, a threat. Sacha had lost count of it all but there was nothing he could do, he had nothing left to give and the lines of worry on his forehead were increasing every day. Sacha scrunched up the letter in his hands and threw it into the wastepaper basket under the desk.   
He was about to get up and go for a walk when his eyes caught the corner of an embroidered piece of card sticking out from underneath the pile of junk. Sacha reached out and grabbed the card. He stared at it, feeling a well of emotion building up inside him. “Sacha Levy, you are invited to the wedding between Mr. Jonathan Maconie and Ms. Jacqueline Naylor on Sunday 18th January 2015 at 2:30pm.” His heart sunk; Sacha knew he had to tell someone about his problems but he didn’t want anything to overshadow what should be the happiest day of Jac’s life. She deserves a perfect day, Sacha told himself. Perhaps after the wedding he could…Sacha shook his head. It was no use, he would have to deal with this by himself. In any case, it was embarrassing to admit he had got himself into so much trouble. His labrador nudged his leg with her snout. Sacha forced himself to smile as he patted her on the head. “I’ve still got you.” 

“Hey are you ready for tonight?” Mo shouted out as Jac strode out of the Emergency Department towards her.   
“Just a quiet night out Mo,” Jac told her, glaring at her threateningly.   
“I know, I know,” Mo replied, she was grinning as she spoke and Jac couldn’t help noticing a feeling of dread growing in the pit of her stomach.   
“Hold on,” Jac said to Mo as she spotted Ethan on his way into the department.   
“I’ll just wait here then,” said Mo.   
“Ethan!” Ethan turned, an expression of surprise passing over his face as he surveyed Jac standing before him.   
“Ms. Naylor,” Ethan mumbled. His working relationship with Jac was a good one but he would be the first to admit that he felt slightly in awe of her; she had been an eminent cardiothoracic consultant when he had first joined the ED and her reputation had preceded her.   
“No need to look so alarmed Ethan,” Jac said in a gentle voice that she hoped would be enough to settle the nervous young doctor. “I just wanted to ask you something.”  
“If it’s about the wedding, I’ve checked and I can get there for about 3 o’clock on Sunday- that was a joke,” Ethan muttered quickly as he spotted the look on Jac’s face.   
“Very funny,” Jac said, her tone deadpan.   
“What did you want to ask me?”   
“Would you like to be Jonny’s best man?” Ethan’s mouth fell open in a shock. He took a couple of steps back from Jac to steady himself.   
“I thought Jonny had asked Mr. Hope?”   
“Elliot might not be able to make it,” Jac said. “Flu,” she added when she caught sight of Ethan’s quizzical expression.   
“Well, err, I would love to but I’m not sure there’s enough time to, y’know,” Ethan’s voice trailed away into silence. “I mean, it’s not that I don’t want to but-“  
“Jonny’s taken care of everything, you just need to turn up on the day and make sure you’ve got the rings.”  
“What about his stag night?”   
“He’s going out for a meal with a few friends tonight, they’re meeting at the Bridge Lane restaurant,” Jac told him. “It’s just a quiet meal, nothing too hectic.”   
“Okay,” said Ethan, nodding uncertainly. “I’ll be there.” Jac nodded and started to walk back towards Mo when Ethan suddenly called out to her: “What time is it?”   
“8:30,” Jac shouted back.   
“Right,” Ethan said to himself. “Shift ends at 7:30, you can make it, just need to be quick…” Ethan jumped as Cal slammed a hand onto his shoulder.   
“Going to Jonny’s do tonight?”   
“Yes,” replied Ethan, nursing his shoulder gingerly. “Why, you’re not coming are you?”  
“Course I am,” Cal said and he winked at Ethan. 

“Is Ms. Naylor on shift today?” Simon asked as Karen skulked past him. She stopped a few metres away and turned back to look at him.   
“Ms. Naylor is off duty until Tuesday as far as I’m aware. On account of her wedding,” replied Karen, her voice was curt and there were large purple bags under her eyes. She yawned, covering her mouth with the back of her left hand.   
“Tired?” Simon asked; he was trying to appear friendly but Karen had come across his type before and she wasn’t fooled.   
“Double-shift,” Karen told him.   
“You should get some rest.”   
“I can rest when I’m dead,” said Karen, stifling another yawn. Simon sat up in his bed suddenly and started to unhook everything that was attached to him. “What do you think you’re doing?” Karen said with exasperation as she attempted to persuade Simon to stay in the bed. “You’re not well enough!”   
“I’m discharging myself,” Simon informed her.   
“This is against medical advice-“ Karen began but she fell silent when she realised there was nothing she could do to convince him to stay.   
“I know,” Simon said. “I just have to go.” 

“You look stunning,” Mo said as Jac performed a small twirl in the ivory coloured wedding dress she was trying on. Jac stared at herself in the mirror and groaned.  
“I look like a stupid meringue.” She picked at the lace frills on her shoulders. “What is the point of all this?” This was the sixth dress Jac had tried on; there had been problems with all of them so far but Mo suspected it was partly due to Jac’s anxiety. Jac would never have admitted that of course. Mo took her by the arms.  
“You look absolutely beautiful.” Jac opened her mouth to disagree but Mo held a finger up to her lips. “A total knock out Naylor.” Jac glanced at the mirror, a flicker of doubt in her eyes.  
“Are you sure?”  
“It’s gorgeous. You’re gorgeous.” Jac smiled awkwardly.   
“You know I never thought I would ever get the chance to choose my own wedding dress and now that the moment’s arrived, I don’t know what to think.”   
“Is it what you expected?” Mo asked.  
“I don’t think so, it’s somehow…better.” 

Ethan opened the restaurant front door and stepped inside. He looked around, attempting to spot where Jonny’s friends were gathered.  
“Can I help you?” Ethan blinked.   
“I’m looking for a small party, under the name Maconie?” The waitress pored over the list of reservations until her finger came to rest on the name.  
“Ah yes, Maconie, they’re upstairs…table eighteen.”   
“Thanks,” said Ethan, smiling warmly. The waitress pointed him in the direction of the stairs and with another mumbled thank you, Ethan walked away. 

“Ms. Naylor, so glad you could join us,” Connie Beauchamp looked impressive, resplendent in a fabulous dark blue dress with matching high heels and her hair flowing over her shoulders. She was holding a large glass of rosé in her hand.   
“Starting without me Mrs. Beauchamp?” Jac’s eyes sparkled and even Connie was quietly impressed by the effort she had made.   
“You know me, I’m not one to wait,” smirked Connie. Behind them, Mo, Jasmine and Charlie were enjoying a few drinks and a not so quiet conversation. Every now and then, a sentence or two would drift over to where Jac and Connie were standing.   
“A small white wine please,” Jac said to the barman. She turned back to face Connie.   
“So tell me about Mr. Maconie?” 

A car sped down the highway; the inside gleamed with cleanliness and there was not a single mark or smudge on the windows or doorhandles. A four-year old boy sat asleep on a booster seat beside the driver. There was silence in the car as the man drove into the night, the headlights blaring. He wore leather driving gloves so that the steering wheel would not be smudged. 

“What’s it like working for the great Connie Beauchamp?” Ethan pondered the question as he took a small sip of beer.   
“Come on Ethan,” Cal nudged him. “What’s it like?” Ethan could feel everybody’s eyes boring into the back of his neck and he felt suddenly self-conscious, his cheeks glowing red.   
“It’s what you would expect,” Ethan said at last.   
“And what’s that,” said Jonny, tears rolling down his face from all the laughter.   
“You know, it’s interesting. She’s very meticulous.”   
“My brother is too modest to admit he’s Connie’s favourite,” Cal announced to everybody, much to Ethan’s annoyance.   
“It’s not true,” Ethan muttered.   
“Yeah it is and you know it.”   
“Cal-“  
“What?”  
“Not here okay, can we just drop it?” Cal turned back to the rest of the party.   
“I appear to have upset my brother.” Ethan scowled. 

“So where’s Grace?” Jac called to Connie over the deafening sound of repetitive pop songs. “I haven’t seen her in ages!” Connie downed another glass of wine before replying.   
“She’s staying with her father for a couple of weeks,” she explained.   
“With Sam?”  
“Well he is the father!”   
“You surprise me.”   
“What about your little Naylor?”   
“Charlie Fairhead’s babysitting her tonight. He offered.” Connie chuckled under her breath. 

The silver car came to a stop and the man leaned over to unfasten his son’s seatbelt. He placed his driving gloves into the glove compartment and drew out a small cloth which he used to wipe the metal of the seatbelt. His son was still fast asleep, the affects of a long journey had taken its toll on the young child who was still relatively small and scrawny for his age. The man opened the car door and stepped out into the night air. There were footsteps behind him as he gazed up at the stars; he turned.   
“I wasn’t expecting to see you here,” said Joseph Byrne.

 

TO BE CONTINUED


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

PART TWENTY-SEVEN

“It’s good to see you,” Joseph said as he embraced Sacha. “It’s been too long.” Sacha’s knuckles were almost blue from the cold, his face ghostly pale but he still forced his lips into a beaming smile.  
“Thanks for coming, I owe you one,” said Sacha after they had broken apart. “I haven’t dragged you away from anything important have I?” Joseph looked first from Sacha and then to Harry, scolding his son with a stare as he spotted the child attempting to run his tongue along the car window.  
“Of course not,” lied Joseph. He twiddled his thumbs behind his back whilst he waited for Sacha’s response.  
“If you’re sure,” replied Sacha, querying the vague stare in Joseph’s eyes. There was something not quite right but Sacha had too much on his mind to worry about that just yet. He watched carefully as Joseph brushed his hand across his, noticing the distinct lack of a wedding ring on Joseph’s finger. Evidently Joseph had caught him staring for he quickly moved his hand away and out of sight.  
“Everything’s fine. The question is, what can I do for you?” Sacha thought about this for a minute, mulling his situation over in his head. He wasn’t quite sure why he’d called Joseph or indeed whether Joseph would be able to do anything at all. Sacha supposed that at the end of the day, he just needed to tell somebody and Joseph, being significantly detached from his life, was the perfect friend for that.  
“It’s a bit embarrassing really,” said Sacha. He looked down at his feet as he spoke; the shame of his predicament rising up inside. Joseph glanced over his shoulder, shivering.  
“Is there anywhere we can talk?” Joseph asked.  
“Oh yes of course, sorry,” Sacha blurted. “Bit silly to be standing here in the cold when we’re just outside my front door.” He laughed out loud but it was an awkward, broken laugh. Sacha waited whilst Joseph collected Harry from his car and then led the way into his house. They were not sorry to close the door behind them and keep out the wind that had begun to gust with an increased bitter bite.

As the night drew later and later, Jac began to think of her warm, cosy bed and of the long journey ahead the next day. Now and then she would attempt to make herself heard over the racket of merry drunken partygoers hellbent on having a good time for as long as they could muster but each time Jac tried, she saw that her friends were all still buzzing with excitement and unusually for the ice queen consultant, Jac did not have the heart to bring the evening to an end. Jac scowled as she suddenly found herself being roughly pushed aside by a middle-aged woman with turquoise eyeshadow and grotesquely long false eyelashes as she made her way to the bar to collect another round of drinks for her entourage of mismatched and equally drunken friends. Jac finished her drink and made her way to where Connie was dancing, although not very delicately as her high heels kept threatening to cave underneath her.  
“Connie!” Jac called out over the second rousing chorus of ‘I’ll Be There For You’. Connie staggered momentarily and turned to face Jac.  
“I wondered where you’d got to!”  
“I just wanted some air,” explained Jac as Connie began to dance again. “Have you seen Jasmine and Charlie?” Connie frowned.  
“I thought Charlie was looking after Hollie?”  
“Not Fairhead, Jasmine’s girlfriend!” Jac shouted back at her. She watched as the moment of realisation dawned slowly on Connie’s face.  
“I think I saw them going outside a few minutes ago,” called back Connie. She gave a sudden yelp as her heels skidded over the sodden floor. She was saved from falling by a well timed nudge from a fellow dancer.  
“I’d better leave them to it,” replied Jac vaguely. “Someone ought to keep an eye on Mo,” she added as she glanced over to where Mo sat, her arms wrapped around a weedy looking man. “I think he’s probably looking for more than just a quick cuddle!”  
“Oh let her have some fun Naylor! She’s not a priest! Ooh I like this one,” yelled Connie as the recognisable sound of ‘Take On Me’ filled the club. Jac wavered doubtfully but then she allowed herself to be led deeper onto the dance floor.

“Do you take sugar?” Sacha asked, stirring the mugs of coffee. Harry was lying beside the dog’s bed, cuddling the gentle labrador. Joseph stuck his head through the doorway:  
“No, thank you,” he said. Sacha nodded and tapped the spoon lightly on the side of the mugs.  
“Here you go,” Sacha said, placing the mug on the kitchen table behind him. He turned back to his own. “Now where’s the sugar,” he muttered as he opened the cupboards above his head, searching for the last place he had left it. “It’s never where you think it ought to be,” said Sacha looking around at Joseph. “And do you know what the worst thing is?”  
“What’s that?” Joseph asked, taking a hearty sip of coffee.  
“I live on my own so there’s only one person to blame when things go missing. Myself.”  
“I see,” said Joseph as he gazed around Sacha’s kitchen. The pale cream walls were faded and in places the paint had begun to chip away; a small crack ran along the middle of the ceiling, stopping just before the main light that hung a little off centre. “I was, err, I was sorry to hear about Chrissie,” he said after a moment’s reflection. Sacha’s hand tightened around the cupboard handle and a spasm of anger passed across his expressions. It was only brief, however and Sacha quickly pulled himself together.  
“Thanks,” he said. “I heard she’d got herself a Sister post in Melbourne,” he added. “She was always smart, Chrissie,” Sacha sighed sadly, the reminiscences reminding him of a happier time in his life.  
“Dad come see!” Joseph’s eyes followed the direction of Harry’s shouts; his son was kneeling in front of the puppy and as he reached out with his left hand, Joseph saw the labrador offer a paw up in response. “She’s shaking my hand!”  
“That’s about the only trick she’s bothered to learn,” said Sacha. “She’s a lazy old lump.” Harry continued to play with the puppy as Joseph and Sacha resumed their conversation.

Jasmine and Charlie were leant against the back wall of the club, their lips locked together as the wind lashed around their ankles. They were too drunk to care, however and in any case they were both perfectly warm. Jasmine had her arms wrapped tightly around Charlie’s waist and she pulled her closer as they kissed.  
“Hey, do you want to go back in?” Charlie murmured, her lips so close to Jasmine’s that she could smell the cherry lipstick and wine on her breath.  
“Let’s stay outside a little longer,” Jasmine whispered back. “It’s private.”  
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” asked Charlie, a naughty glint arising in her eyes. Jasmine nodded. They kissed again, Jasmine’s hand moving down on to Charlie’s arse. Their passion increased and the kiss lingered a while longer than the last one.

“I’m a cardiothoracic registrar,” Mo announced loudly to the group that had gathered around her on the red velvet sofas at the back of the club. Her arms were still wrapped around the weedy man’s thin neck and she was leaning her entire body into his side. “And I deal with transplants,” Mo continued, her words slurred but no one else in the group either cared or noticed.  
“Want another drink?” Asked one of the men who surrounded her. Mo looked down at the empty beer glass on the table and then she held out one of her hands in front of her eyes and watched as it trembled and shook.  
“Yeah why not, it’s party ain’t it,” Mo replied and burst into a loud snorting cackle.  
“What d’ya want?”  
“Another pint ta,” Mo answered. The man nodded and began to wade his way through the hoards of dancer towards the bar. Mo turned back to gaze at the weedy man beside her. “So where were we?” She grinned drunkenly.  
“Right about here,” the weedy man answered, leaning forwards for a kiss.

“I really should be getting back,” Jac said into Connie’s ear during a brief lull in the music as they danced. “I told Jonny I wouldn’t be out too late.”  
“He’s a man,” said Connie derisively. “Let him stew,” she added at the look of ‘so what’ on Jac’s face.  
“Okay,” sighed Jac. She stared at her watch. “But once it gets past 2am I really have to get back, we’re supposed to be heading up to Scotland tomorrow!”  
“Well that still leaves us an hour to enjoy ourselves,” said Connie, leaning on Jac’s shoulder to steady herself.

“Jac where are you? I’ve rung you about five times now,” hissed Jonny into his mobile as he paced around their bedroom. His Scottish accent always became more pronounced when he was tired or irritable. “Call me back when you get this message,” he threw his phone down on to the bed and continued to pace. His footsteps were slow and quiet; Hollie was asleep in her bedroom and Jonny did not want to wake his daughter.

Connie staggered out of the club, her handbag hanging over her shoulder, and wandered around to the veranda at the back. She swayed precariously from side to side as she walked and almost toppled into Jasmine and Charlie.  
“Sorry,” Connie muttered, using the wall to push herself away from them. They ignored her and continued to lean against the wall, their arms locked into a deep embrace that wasn’t likely to break any time soon. Connie slipped on her heels again as she reached into her handbag and took out her phone.  
“Let’s go back inside,” Jasmine said as she watched Connie dial. “This is gonna turn messy.” Charlie nodded and they both made their way back in to the club, leaving Connie as she held her now ringing phone up to her face.  
“Hello?” Sam Strachan’s voice filled the air, unchanged by the years that had passed since he left Holby. “Connie?”  
“Hi, I’m just ringing to check on Grace, how is she?” There was a pause.  
“Are you drunk?”  
“I’ve had a couple glasses, hardly the crime of the century Sam,” replied Connie.  
“Where are you?”  
“Never mind all that, just tell me how Grace is,” Connie answered, growing irritated by Sam’s questioning.  
“She’s fine Connie, you know I am capable of coping!”  
“I know you are, there’s no need to sound so defensive.”  
“I’m not getting defensive!” It was Sam’s turn to be irritated now. Silence intercepted the conversation as Connie paced unsteadily around the veranda, balancing herself by holding onto one of the outside tables.

Joseph perused the pile of letters Sacha had given him; bills and final demands and threats from companies that were still waiting to receive their money. He tutted as he caught sight of the amount that Sacha owed.  
“I don’t know what to say,” Sacha told him; he looked sheepish, his eyes lined with shame. “It’s a right old mess isn’t it?” Joseph didn’t answer, his head was still buried in the details of Sacha’s most recent letter. He looked up from it after a few minutes, shaking his head and gazing at Sacha in disbelief.  
“This is serious Sacha,” Joseph said once he had collected his thoughts. “What happened? How did you let things get out of hand like this?” Sacha sighed deeply and leant back into the shadow given off by the door.  
“I don’t know,” he said at last, gazing down at his feet and letting out another heavy sigh. “Everything just seemed to pile on top of everything.” Joseph frowned.  
“But surely your salary would have been able to cov-“  
“It was at first but then,” Sacha paused. “I don’t know when it started, it was just a couple of scratch cards a few times a week and then I got started trying out all these online sites and…” His voice trailed away into silence.  
“Gambling,” Joseph finished for him. “Sacha what were you thinking?” Sacha edged towards his desk, shuffling his feet along the carpet like a child who’d just been scolded by his mother.  
“I don’t know, I honestly don’t know. I mean it all seemed so simple,” said Sacha quietly but he knew there was no explanation he could give that would satisfy his conscience.  
“Sacha you know better than to get yourself involved with these sites. All they’re interested in, is how much money they can get out of innocent unsuspecting participant,”said Joseph but his tone was not harsh and his eyes were filled with understanding.  
“I know, I’ve been a stupid old fool. It’s entirely my fault but I just…I just don’t know what to do,” Sacha finished, holding his arms out helplessly in Joseph’s direction. Joseph reached into his jacket pocket, his fingers curling around his chequebook.  
“I might be able to help you out a little bit,” Joseph said, drawing out the chequebook and laying it down on the desk in front of him. When Sacha saw it, however the colour drained from his face and he waved his hand, mumbling for Joseph to put the book away.  
“I don’t want any charity,” Sacha explained. “This is my mess and I need to sort it out myself.” Joseph nodded.  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to…you know what I meant.”  
“You’re a good friend Joseph,” replied Sacha. Joseph smiled, shuffling the collection of letters into a neat pile. For a brief second his eyes caught the corner of the wedding invitation and as he brushed it aside, he noticed the curl of the ‘J’. An expression of doubt passed across Joseph’s face but he quickly put it from his mind and turned back to Sacha.

“Connie we’ve been over this a hundred times before,” Sam was saying, his voice growing wearier as the phone call drew on. “I did not sleep with her to get back at you.” Connie was sitting on the ground, her legs crossed; there were goosebumps all over her skin and her teeth chattered as she spoke.  
“Maybe not but it was still in the back of your mind,” Connie retaliated. She recoiled slightly from the sound of Sam groaning in exasperation.  
“How many times Connie? I haven’t even spoken to her for about five years. This is ancient history, why are you bringing it up now?” Sam paused, waiting for Connie’s response but when none came, he added: “Connie, I think it’s time you got some sleep. You’re not making much sense.”  
“You don’t tell me when it’s time I got some sleep, Strachan!” Without waiting for Sam to reply, Connie hung up and dropped the phone back into her handbag. She rose unsteadily to her feet, using the bench for balance once again.

Jac screwed up her eyes as she played back the considerable number of messages Jonny had left her. They were all in the same vain and once she had listened to the fifth one, she figured she’d heard them all. She glanced around the club; Connie was still outside, Jasmine and Charlie had gone home and Mo was still with that man in the corner. Jac didn’t trust him, he was getting far too close to Mo but she was too drunk to push him away. She turned back to her phone and dialled Jonny’s number. She waited while it rung but there was no answer; Jonny had presumably decided to call it a night. Listening out for the tone, Jac stood calmly and then recorded her message.  
“Jonny. It’s Jac, I’m heading back now so you’ll probably see me in about twenty minutes. Don’t wait up,” Jac paused, trying to think of something else to add but nothing sprang to mind. She stared back over at Mo, her eyes narrowed in concentration. There was a nagging doubt in her head and she couldn’t shake the feeling that Mo was getting herself into trouble. Eventually Jac decided she couldn’t contain herself any longer and started to walk towards Mo. As she drew closer, she began to overhear snippets of the conversation and Jac knew she had made the right decision.

“Give us another kiss love?” The weedy man asked Mo, leering at her and baring his crooked teeth. Mo’s face was a pale green; her stomach seemed to be on the verge of declaring an all out war against her. She brushed the man away but it made no difference. “Ah go on gorgeous, you know you want to,” Again he leaned in for a kiss and again Mo pushed him away but the man did not appear to lose heart. “Tease,” he whispered and continued in his persistence.  
“Gerroff me,” said Mo. It was the first time she had explicitly told him to back off but his continued sleazing had had its toll on her. She felt sick and the last thing on her mind was getting off with the nearest drunken slimeball. The weedy man held up his arms in mock apology.  
“I’m sorry. My mistake,” he said. “But you know, you shouldn’t lead a guy on. It’s rude.” Mo stared at him in surprise.  
“What are you-I didn’t lead you on!”  
“Yeah you did a bit, but it’s okay. I totally understand,” he replied. Mo didn’t like the way he kept gazing at her, it made her feel uneasy. She started to edge away from him but he followed.  
“Look, I’m not feeling very well so could you just leave me be?” Mo asked, hoping to somehow get through to him. He ignored her, sidling up to her and attempting to put his arm back around her shoulders. Mo flinched, knocking him away. This time the weedy man did not just accept it. He growled under his breath and grabbed Mo’s arms, trapping them behind her back.  
“What the hell are you doing? Let go!” Mo said, wincing in pain. The man, however did not let go and continued to force her arms back.  
“You’re a stupid little tease and I’m just teaching ya a lesson,” he whispered into her ear. “Women like you shouldn’t be allowed to get away with stringing us along, d’ya understand what I mean, eh?”  
“I wasn’t leading you on!” Mo hissed back at him, breathlessly. Her eyes had begun to water from the pain her arms were in. She attempt to pull herself away from him but the man merely tightened his hold on her. Desperately, Mo looked around the club for someone, anyone to come to her aid but everybody was either drinking or dancing and the music was so loud that she supposed no one would even hear her if she screamed.  
“Don’t even think about it,” the man warned her. Mo’s heart was thumping inside her chest and for the first time she began to feel seriously afraid. This man was clearly off his head and there was no knowing what he might be capable of. “You’re just gonna sit here, nice and quiet like and we’ll have a friendly chat, okay?” Jac cleared her throat behind them. “Yeah, what is it?” The man asked as he turned and looked up at Jac. “Can’t ya see I’m busy here?”  
“I believe she asked you to leave,” replied Jac, her voice dangerously calm.  
“Yeah? What’s it to you?”  
“I’m not going to ask you again. Go,” Jac was glaring at him but the man was too drunk to heed her warning.  
“Oh go an’ bother someone else will ya?” Jac sighed.  
“Don’t say I didn’t give you a chance,” and before the man could say anything, Jac brought her right fist around and landed it squarely in the centre of his face. In his confusion, he released Mo and clasped his hands over his nose. Jac saw the trickles of blood running between his fingers and she smiled with a grim satisfaction. “Don’t tell Jonny,” she muttered to Mo. Mo didn’t reply, she was still staring from Jac to the weedy man, her mouth open in shock.

The wedding invitation was evidently still on Joseph’s mind as he sat at Sacha’s kitchen table, drinking a fresh cup of coffee. They had spoken for quite some time about Sacha’s continued situation but had both come to the conclusion that Sacha would have to work double shifts to have any hope of paying his vast debts. Joseph blinked.  
“Sacha,” he began but then he quickly closed his mouth and took another sip of coffee. Sacha looked up from his coffee; unlike Joseph, he had barely touched his. Joseph’s eyes wandered over to the photo frame of Daniel that Sacha kept on top of the fridge. “Do you see much of Daniel these days?”  
“Once, maybe twice a year,” Sacha replied gloomily. “It’s not Chrissie’s fault,” he added spotting the raised eyebrow on Joseph’s face. “He’s settled into school now and it’s not fair for me to just pop in and out of his life.”  
“But he’s your son,” Joseph told him. “He deserves to have a father.” Sacha smiled.  
“He’s got a wonderful mother and I know she’s doing the best she can for him. If it were possible for me to see him more often, I would. Of course I would.” Joseph decided not to press the matter any further, besides the small matter of that wedding invitation was again burrowing its way through his mind.  
“Sacha, I hope you don’t mind me asking,” began Joseph. “But I couldn’t help coming across that wedding invitation when I was tidying away the letters on your desk earlier.” Sacha’s heart dropped; he’d been waiting for this moment when he would have to explain what was going on.  
“Ah,” replied Sacha. “I wondered if you’d seen that.” Joseph stared at him, nonplussed.  
“Who’s getting married?” There was a drawn out pause as Sacha considered the best way to break the news to Joseph. “Well, who is it?” Joseph asked, prompting Sacha.  
“It’s Jac, Joseph,” Sacha told him. “Jac’s getting married.” Joseph’s reaction was exactly how Sacha had predicted and even though he tried to conceal it, there was no mistaking the expression on Joseph’s face.  
“That’s wonderful news,” Joseph said, not quite as convincingly as he had hoped. “Who to?” Joseph added after another pause. “I mean not that it’s any of my business, I’m just interested…” He fell silent.  
“Jonny Maconie,” Sacha explained. “He’s the clinical nurse manager,” he added at the look of confusion on Joseph’s face.  
“Never thought Jac would settle for a nurse, she must be going soft,” Joseph muttered under his breath.  
“They’ve got a child together,” Sacha continued. Joseph’s mouth fell open.  
“You’re joking,” he said, aghast.  
“A little girl, she’s just over a year old now.” Sacha’s words whirled around Joseph’s mind but as he had come this far already, he supposed he might as well hear the rest of it.  
“Maconie, that’s Scottish isn’t it?” Sacha nodded. “Well I can’t say I’m surprised Jac fell for a Scot after…never mind,” Joseph said, pretty much to himself.  
“Here, I think I’ve got a photo of them in one of the drawers,” said Sacha pulling open one of the drawers in the cabinet behind the table and reaching through the assorted mess of junk. “Ah yes, here it is,” Sacha said as he fished out the creased photo and handed it to Joseph. Joseph’s eyes lingered on Jac for a while before passing over to stare at Jonny.  
“He’s not bad,” said Joseph and Sacha just laughed.  
“I can’t expect you to be ecstatic over it can I?” Joseph looked at the photo again, frowning.  
“No, no I’m happy for her, I am. She deserves some happiness,” he paused, his mind filled with fresh thoughts. Sacha watched him closely.  
“You just wish it was with you,” he said quietly; Joseph looked away from him, staring out of the kitchen window in silence. He leant on the table, his muscles clenching. “Are you going to tell me what happened to you then?” Joseph looked round at Sacha in astonishment. “Your hand,” Sacha explained. “There’s no ring.” Joseph opened his mouth as if to murmur ‘oh’ and then closed it. “So what happened?”  
“Nothing,” Joseph told him. “It just wasn’t meant to be.” Sacha’s eyes twinkled warmly.  
“I’ll always listen if you need to talk,” he said to Joseph and he meant it. Joseph nodded, rising from his seat.  
“Listen Sacha, I should get going, it’s late and Harry’s going to be a very tired child tomorrow as it is.”  
“You’re not going back straight away are you?” Sacha asked as he watched Joseph put on his jacket and call Harry from the study.  
“No, I thought I’d stay in Holby for a few days, catch up with the family,” Joseph called back to him.  
“Ah right,” said Sacha. He wasn’t quite sure why he did it but after all Joseph had listened to all of his problems and he felt he ought to do something to make up for it. “The wedding’s on Sunday.”  
“In Holby?” Sacha shook his head.  
“They’re having it up in Scotland, listen, I’ll write down the address for you.” He fetched a pen and a scrap of paper from the still open drawer and scribbled down the address. He offered it to Joseph but the unsure man backed away.  
“I don’t think it’s a good idea if I-“  
“Take it,” Sacha said firmly. “You need closure and this is the best way.” Joseph still had his doubts but he accepted the scrap and tucked it away inside his wallet.

Friday 16th January - 2 Days Until The Wedding - The Journey to Scotland

The standard carriages were all chockablock as Jac, Jonny and Hollie embarked on the 11:30 train to London Waterloo at Holby Station. Jac looked around for somewhere to sit but Jonny shook his head and pointed down the aisle to first class.  
“Only the best,” he said and led the way, carrying their suitcases. Jac was holding Hollie in her arms, both girls smiling at the man in their lives. Jonny piled the cases on to the luggage rack and held the door open for Jac. He glanced at their tickets. “Over there,” Jonny said and pointed to three seats at the back of the carriage.  
“This only goes to London?” Jac asked, checking over the details of their journey.  
“That’s right,” Jonny told her. “We change at Waterloo, take the tube to Euston and then the first train to Edinburgh.” Jac yawned, the events of the previous night beginning to catch up with her. “First class all the way, so you’ll be able to get plenty of sleep,” Jonny added. Jac smirked at him.  
“Very funny. Who else is getting there tonight?”  
“Ethan and Cal are getting the same train, Mo and Connie are going up slightly later, Elliot said he’d try to get there tomorrow if he can,” Jonny said, ticking them off on his hand. “Jasmine and Charlie haven’t said but I presume it’s tonight or tomorrow at the latest.”  
“Something’s going to go wrong,” Jac muttered. “I know it.”  
“Nothing will go wrong,” Jonny told her. “Stop worrying.”  
“You’re right," Jac said but as she sat back in her seat she couldn’t shake the feeling of apprehension that grew fiercer as the time wore on.

The journey to Waterloo passed mostly in silence. Jac had brought a book to read but after only a couple of pages, her eyelids had begun to droop and she placed the book down on the table. Jonny looked up at her but she had fallen fast asleep; he smiled affectionately, drew the curtains and then turned his attentions on Hollie who was clawing at his forearm. As the train made its way through the countryside, Jonny held Hollie in his arms, stroking her curly hair and playing a variation of quiet games to pass the time. Hollie would gurgle and almost shout out but Jonny would simply put a finger to his lips and she would fall silent, glancing at where her mother was asleep.   
Jonny had meticulously packed everything he was sure they would need but his mind would continually flick back and he found himself wondering if he had forgotten something. After he had almost gotten up from his seat to check his suitcase for the third time, Jonny muttered under his breath and the rest of the journey passed quite peacefully. When the train pulled into Waterloo Station, Jonny leant over and gently nudged Jac awake. She opened her eyes, groggily.   
“Are we there yet?”   
“Just arriving into Waterloo,” Jonny told her. Jac groaned, yawning and stretching her limbs wildly. “I told you not to stay out late,” said Jonny, grinning. Jac gave him a smarmy smile.  
“Shut up.”   
“I’m not say anything,” Jonny said, holding his hands up. The train came to a stop a few moments later and they listened as the Guard’s voice droned out of the intercom. They were instructed to wait for a few minutes whilst a couple of extra carriages were linked up to the back of the train. Once that was completed, they stood up and made their way to the nearest exit. Jonny passed Hollie over to Jac and turned to collect their luggage from the racks. 

It took a few minutes and a lot of careful adjustment before they had finally disembarked from the train. A surly London Guard shot a reproachful look at them but he recoiled when Jac returned the favour. They passed through the ticket barrier and made their way on to the Underground.  
“We need to take the Northern Line,” said Jonny as he stared up at the nearest information screen. “Good service, that’ll make our lives easier.” He turned back to Jac. “Everything okay?”  
“Yeah, I’m just tired,” Jac said, smiling faintly. In truth she was beginning to feel quite frightened as their wedding drew nearer but she didn’t want to alarm Jonny. It was just nerves, everybody had them. “We get off at Euston?”   
“That’s right,” Jonny said. 

They were not sorry to leave the underground after having to spend a few unpleasant minutes pressed up to the sides of an overfull car. The smell of sweat and stale alcohol was also becoming unbearable and Hollie showed signs of wanting to cry. Fortunately they only had to wait ten minutes for the train to Edinburgh to arrive and Jac let out a tremendous sigh of relief once she had been able to fling herself into their first class seats. Jonny dropped the bag of food he’d picked up at Waterloo on to the table.   
As the train roared into life and began to snake its way in the direction of Edinburgh, Hollie curled herself up into a tiny ball on her seat and closed her eyes, the gentle humming of the engine helping her to fall asleep quickly. Jac pulled out her book and continued where she’d left off whilst Jonny pulled out a sandwich, offered it to Jac who told him to just leave it out in front of her. Jonny reached inside the bag again and this time pulled out his own sandwich. He unwrapped the packaging and began to eat.   
It was a long journey, during which they discussed a number of matters, most of which linked up to their wedding in some way. Jac grew increasingly apprehensive as the train came closer and closer to Scotland and Jonny did his best to reassure her. He understood the pressure that Jac was feeling and he had a number of butterflies in his own stomach, squirming away. They had just about passed the halfway point when Ethan and Cal made their way into the carriage. Cal was dressed casually, but Ethan sported a blue velvet jacket.   
“Ah so this is where you’re hiding,” Cal said as he pulled himself onto a seat on the other side of the carriage. He turned his legs so that they were pointing at Jac and Jonny.   
“We’ve upgraded,” Ethan explained, sitting down, opposite to his brother. Jonny nodded. Ethan clapped his hands to his jacket pocket. “Don’t worry, I’ve got the rings,” he said.   
“Good,” replied Jonny.  
“Wouldn’t want to lose those would we? Imagine that, it’d be a total…” Ethan fell silent at the look on Jonny’s face. “…Disaster,” he finished at a mumble.   
“Little one’s asleep then?” Cal asked, breaking through the awkward silence that had followed.   
“Yeah, journey’s taken it out of her a bit, poor thing,” said Jonny.   
“I don’t blame her, I’m exhausted myself,” said Cal. 

After that Ethan and Cal turned away, leaving Jac and Jonny to their own discussions. From what they could overhear, Jac was having her hair done on Sunday morning and Jonny was trying to stick to one of the old traditions of weddings.   
“What does it matter if you see me before the wedding?” Jac asked, her voice high and incredulous.   
“It’s important to me, okay?”   
“Just seems like a waste of time. You already know what I look like, it’s not as if you’re marrying some tart that you see for the first time as she walks up the aisle.” Jonny bit his lip, trying not to laugh.  
“I’m gonna crash in Sacha’s room at the hotel,” he explained. “That way, I won’t get in your way and I’ll still have my traditions.” Jac saw there was no arguing with him and sat back in her seat.  
“Fine, fine. You win, have it your way.” 

Ethan and Cal had fallen into an aggressive game of top trumps after this and the rest of the conversation passed by unknown to them. After Cal had won a few games, it transpired that he’d hidden a spare card up his sleeve and Ethan berated him quietly for cheating.   
“I did not cheat,” Cal whispered.   
“You had that up your arm!” Ethan exclaimed, pointing at the offending card. “Or is that a rule I wasn’t previously aware of?”   
“It’s not my fault if you don’t pay attention,” said Cal, smirking with delight at his own scheming. Ethan was far from impressed.  
“Yes well some of us aspire to higher things than cheating at top trumps.” Cal shrugged.   
“Come on, play another hand. I promise I won’t cheat.” Ethan looked at him doubtfully. “Come on, there’s nothing else to do.” This was true and reluctantly, Ethan agreed to challenge his brother for the sixth time. He kept a careful eye on Cal and made sure that he shuffled and split the deck himself. 

It was pitch dark by the time the train pulled itself into Edinburgh Waverley. Ethan and Cal got off first, hailing a taxi with a sharp whistle from Cal.   
“Show off,” said Jac as she walked behind them but she couldn’t quite manage to hide the impressed look on her face. The taxi came to a stop a few feet away from the entrance and a burly Scot stuck his head out of the window, beckoning them. They each picked up their belongings and piled them into the boot before Jonny, Ethan and Cal climbed onto the backseat and Jac sat in the front. Jac gave the destination and they all relaxed as the taxi drove them to the hotel.   
Jac and Jonny said their goodnights to Ethan and Cal at their door and once they had put Hollie to bed, they both collapsed with exhaustion on to their own.   
“Well, we’ve made it,” said Jonny.   
“This is it,” replied Jac.   
“Good luck,” and without another word, they both rolled over and fell fast asleep. 

TO BE CONTINUED


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

PART TWENTY-EIGHT

Saturday 17th January - 1 Day Until The Wedding

Edinburgh 

It was almost midday when Jac and Jonny had finally woken up; the sun beaming through the blinds of their hotel room. Jonny yawned as he stretched and pulled himself out of bed. Jac sat up, rubbing her eyes and struggling to stay awake. She watched Jonny stroll over to the window, open it and stare out at the brisk, snow-covered Edinburgh view. A cold breeze floated over them and Jac began to shiver.  
“Do we have to have that open?” Jac asked, rubbing her shoulders and covering herself in as much duvet as was humanly possible.   
“Fresh Scottish air Jac, you can’t beat it,” Jonny replied, basking in the chill wind.   
“I’ll beat you if you don’t close that window,” Jac muttered under her breath. Fortunately for Jonny, however at that moment he decided to close the window and pivot around to face Jac. Jac knew the look on his face immediately and she threw herself back onto the pillow, groaning. “Just another hour, I am knackered!”   
“The rehearsal’s in just over two hours and it takes about an hour to get to the church,” Jonny told her.  
“Exactly, which means I can have an extra hour in bed, we leave here at one and still get to the church on time for ten past two.”   
“Come on Jac, get up,” replied Jonny, attempting to force Jac out of bed. She scowled at him, stifling a yawn at the same time but reluctantly, she clambered out of the bed and rose to her feet. Without waiting for another word from Jonny, Jac strode into the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind her. There was a knock behind Jonny. “Who is it?”   
“It’s Sacha,” came Sacha’s voice from behind the bedroom door. Jonny clicked his neck and jogged over to the door, opening it with the keycard. Sacha greeted Jonny by enveloping him in an enormous bear hug which he gratefully received.   
“You made it then,” Jonny laughed, patting Sacha on the small of his back.   
“Just about,” replied Sacha, following Jonny into the room. “You wouldn’t believe the amount of delays on the line.”   
“It’s that time of year,” said Jonny. “Anyone else with you?” Sacha screwed up his eyes in concentration, he appeared to be deep in thought. After a brief moment he opened them, clapping his hands together joyfully.   
“Yes, I think everybody who’s coming is now here,” Sacha informed him. An expression of deep relief passed over Jonny’s face. There was, however still one question that needed to be asked.   
“What about Elliot?” He’d been expecting Sacha’s face to darken, for him to explain that unfortunately Elliot was just too under the weather to make the journey and that he sent them both his love and affection, however Sacha’s face did not darken. He did not relay Elliot’s excuses, instead he beamed broadly and his eyes twinkled with delight.   
“He made it,” Sacha told him. “He’s still a bit ugh but he was determined not to miss this.” Relief flooded through Jonny and he didn’t know whether he wanted to hug or kiss Sacha. He settled on a hug.   
“That’s great news,” he said breathlessly. “Jac’ll be thrilled.” Sacha’s eyes lit up at the mention of Jac.  
“Ah yes, talking of Jac,” Sacha began. “Where is she?”   
“In the bathroom. Freshening up I expect,” said Jonny, pointing at the closed bathroom door to his left. Sacha chuckled.   
“I bet you’re both really excited,” he said.   
“We’re more tired than anything,” replied Jonny morosely but then his lips curled into a cheeky grin and he laughed out loud. “Course we are,” he said jovially. 

Simon Burrows trudged through the ice-strewn streets of Edinburgh City Centre, dragging his suitcase with one arm behind his back. His feet were sodden and his skin frozen but there was only one thing on his mind. He had to find her. She had to be made to understand. The wedding seemed like the best opportunity to carry out his plans, but that was tomorrow and tomorrow was still a long time away. He would have to find somewhere to stay for the night; there had to be a cheap B&B somewhere in this dense city. Simon stopped, reached into his pockets and felt around for his wallet. He could feel the stares and hear the whisperings and he knew that he must look pretty odd just standing there in the snow with one hand in his pocket. He let out a cold, dry laugh. It didn’t matter how much money he had left, he wouldn’t need money any more. Not once his plan had ben carried out. There was still so much to do, however and Simon couldn’t afford to dawdle.   
The whispers had grown into excited mutterings now and Simon was able to cherry-pick bits and pieces from their conversation. He didn’t understand much of it but it was evident that they were talking about him. He made a face at the nearest stranger and turned his back on them, walking away through the snow. 

The rehearsal passed by with only a few minor hitches. First, Ethan had left the rings on his bedside table back at the hotel but after Jonny had shot him a deeply disappointed gaze, Ethan promised he wouldn’t forget tomorrow. Cal offered to tie the rings to the inside of Ethan’s best-man jacket but this suggestion had been met with little enthusiasm by his brother. The second and altogether less important setback was the late arrival of the Priest. He had apologised most profusely for the delay, insisting that it had been due to a minor collision on one of the roads, but he would not say which. It hardly matter, however and after all it was only a rehearsal. It was better to iron out the creases now rather than rely on everything running smoothly tomorrow. Jonny’s reassurances did little to persuade Jac who was now so jittery with nerves that she jumped at any sudden movement. One part of the rehearsal had to be placed on hold when Jac, overcome by nerves, had run back down the aisle and outside the church. It was Sacha who went after her, handing Hollie back over to Jonny.  
Sacha found Jac wandering around the cemetery behind the back of the church. The headstones shone with ice and snow and many of the names and dates had become obscured by years of erosion.   
“I don’t want to be buried,” Jac said, kneeling in front of one of the graves. Her legs were frozen. Sacha knelt down beside her; he winced as his legs touched the ice.   
“Well there aren’t any plans to bury you now,” Sacha said, nudging Jac affectionately.   
“You know what I mean,” said Jac.   
“What’s the matter Jac, eh?” Sacha placed an arm around Jac’s shoulder whilst she continued to stare at the grave.   
“Richard Murray,” Jac read aloud, scraping away some of the snow from the headstone so that she could read the dates. “Died 1952, aged 28. He barely even lived,” said Jac, sighing. “Survived by his wife Mary and their three children, Alex, Sarah and Isobel.” She leant back, resting her head on Sacha’s shoulder. “I’m 38, Sacha.”   
“I know,” replied Sacha, his voice quiet and contemplative.   
“He had all of that and he still died ten years younger than I am now.”   
“We all live our lives in different ways,” Sacha told her. “It doesn’t matter when we get married or how many times or even how many children we may have.” Jac looked up at him doubtfully. “What matters is that we live, because Jac,” Sacha paused to smile at her. “Because at the end of the day, you never know what card you’re going to be dealt and you’ve just got to make the best of it.”  
“But what if I mess this up?” Sacha played with her hair, staring into her shining green eyes.   
“You won’t,” Sacha said at last.  
“You don’t know that,” mumbled Jac. “There is nothing so great and so wonderful that I can’t mess up. It’s like some kind of talent. No matter how good something is, I always manage to throw it away.” Sacha handed her his handkerchief to help wipe away the tears.   
“That’s not true and you know it,” he told her firmly.   
“I don’t think I can do this,” Jac said through trembling lips. “I’m not cut out for any of it.”   
“Yes, you are,” replied Sacha. “I believe in you even if you don’t believe in yourself and you’re going to go back in that church and be with your family.” Jac sniffed, her nose partially blocked from crying.   
“What if it all goes wrong?”   
“It won’t. Trust me,” implored Sacha. Jac gazed into his kindly eyes. She did trust him; she trusted him absolutely and without a doubt. Yet her insides were on fire, her hands shook uncontrollably and she couldn’t think of a single reason to believe him. It wasn’t that she thought he was lying to her but Jac just couldn’t imagine a life without mistakes or suffering in it. Sacha seemed to know what was going through her mind because he suddenly pulled her into one of his famous hugs. Jac nestled her head in his chest. “Jac you are the most beautiful, intelligent and quite frankly amazing woman I’ve ever met. I know you can do this because you’re…you’re stronger than any of us.” A tear slid down Jac’s cheek.  
“I don’t know what I would do without you,” she murmured softly.   
“I’m not going anywhere,” replied Sacha. 

“Has anyone seen Karen?” Charlie Fairhead’s voice was filled with concern as he glanced around Karen’s deserted office. The alarm bells had first rung for the veteran nurse when Karen had failed to show up for her shift that morning. Normally he wouldn’t be that bothered by a staff member skipping a shift; it happened all the time and Charlie often looked forward to the lecture he could give when they finally decided to show up. Karen, however was a special case. In the six months Charlie had known her, she had never ever missed a shift and barely took any of her holiday. Something wasn’t quite right but he just didn’t seem able to put his finger on it.   
“Tried ringing her earlier,” Ash called to Charlie. “There was no answer, it just rang out.” Charlie felt a twinge of unease in his stomach.   
“When was the last time anyone saw her?” He asked as Ash walked alongside him.   
“Rachel saw her drive home after her shift yesterday.” Charlie frowned.  
“What time was that?”   
“About 10am,” replied Ash.   
“Do you think someone should go round her place, check on her?” They stopped walking and Ash turned to face Charlie.   
“Look, she’s probably just overslept or something, she’s been working double shifts all week. She’ll show up later,” said Ash but Charlie did not share his confidence.  
“I suppose you’re right,” Charlie replied, the nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach growing. 

Simon placed the suitcase on the moth-eaten bed and proceeded to open it up. His eyes lit up, glinting with grim satisfaction as he stared down at the red jerry can, partially hidden by clothes. He lifted it up, feeling the petrol slosh around inside. He laid the can to one side and picked up a white shirt, holding it up to his chest. The shirt was stained with dried blood, splattered across the main body and all over the upturned collar. Simon began to laugh, the memory of what he had done flooding through his mind. He folded the shirt and placed it back at the bottom of the suitcase. He knew it wouldn’t be long before they discovered what had happened but by the time they connected it to him, it would be far too late. There was nothing anyone could do to stop him now. 

Joseph was hardly listening as his mother served him a late lunch of spinach wrapped in goat’s cheese and whiskers of chicken at the Byrne mansion in London. Anne-Marie was ranting about improved congestion in the city centre and, in between all that, telling Joseph how well Sophia was doing in her new job. Joseph’s mind was on other things, however and as he picked up his fork to eat, he discovered that he had lost his appetite. It was this that finally got Anne-Marie to realise something was bothering him.   
“What’s the matter Joseph?” She asked, fixing him with a steely glare. “You’ve barely touched your lunch.”   
“I’m not hungry,” replied Joseph, pushing his plate away from him.   
“Don’t be stupid Joseph, you’ve not eaten since breakfast. You’re not on one of those awful diets are you? You know how dangerous they are.”   
“No mother, I’m just not hungry,” Joseph told her, his tone exasperated.   
“You’re not ill are you?” Joseph rolled his eyes to the ceiling but Anne-Marie saw. “I’m your mother Joseph, it’s in my nature to worry. Now are you going to tell me what’s on your mind or do I have to call your sister?” Joseph reclined in his seat in an attempt to seem relaxed but the result was such that he appeared even more uptight and anxious, a fact that Anne-Marie latched upon almost immediately. “Joseph, you’ve been unusually quiet ever since you got here, something is clearly the matter and if you can’t tell your own mother, who can you tell?” Joseph exhaled; there was no getting round it. He would have to tell his mother something if only to get her off his back. He got to his feet and walked down the marble steps that led to the indoor conservatory. Anne-Marie watched as her son picked up a photo of his brother, his fingers wrapped around the gold frame and taking care not to smudge the glass. “Harry would have been proud of you Joseph,” Anne-Marie said as she appeared behind him, looking over his shoulder.   
“I’m not even sure if I’m proud of myself,” Joseph replied in a low voice. “Two failed marriages, it’s hardly something to be proud of.” He placed the frame back down on the side-table.   
“Marriages fail Joseph,” said Anne-Marie. “What matters is the man you are inside.”   
“Jac’s getting married,” Joseph announced suddenly but Anne-Marie did not seem fazed. Instead she merely looked into her son’s eyes and smiled, as if she had already known.   
“I heard,” Anne-Marie said. “Elliot Hope mentioned it to me.” Joseph looked at his mother with surprise; he felt angry that she hadn’t told him before and hurt that it appeared she didn’t trust him with his own feelings.   
“How long have you known?”   
“Since the engagement,” she said simply.   
“You’ve known for that long and you didn’t think I had a right to know,” Joseph said, aghast. Anne-Marie was unperturbed by the fury in Joseph’s eyes as she gripped her son’s hand.   
“Joseph how was I supposed to tell you? You were in the middle of another divorce and it hardly seemed the time to remind you of…of that woman.” Joseph said nothing, he just stared angrily out into the vast garden. “Joseph, listen to me. I thought it was for the best that you didn’t know.”   
“I am old enough to decide for myself,” replied Joseph under his breath. Anne-Marie just sighed; Joseph had always been the most difficult of her children. He took after Charles in that respect. 

The ambulance skidded to a halt outside Karen’s house. There hadn’t been an emergency call but as it was the end of their shift, Charlie had asked Jeff and Dixie if they could check on her. Jeff looked at the house uneasily; the lights were off and the blinds drawn as if nobody was at home.   
“Check around the back princess,” Jeff muttered to Dixie. “See if her car’s here.” Dixie nodded and walked away, her footsteps crunching across the gravel. Moments later she returned, and nodded at Jeff. They tried the door but it was locked tight and no amount of pressure would shift it. Jeff bit his lip as he tried to decide on the best course of action. He strode over to one of Karen’s rockeries and picked up a large flat stone.   
“Don’t you dare Jeffrey!” Dixie shouted, realising what Jeff intended to do.   
“Listen Dix, Karen could be lying in there injured and there’s no other way in.” Dixie thought about this and then conceded that Jeff did in fact, have a point.   
“If she’s just slept in, this is on your head Jeffrey,” she warned him. Jeff smiled as he used the stone to smash the kitchen window near the front door. 

It was almost evening when they arrived back at the hotel, but they still had a couple of hours to kill before dinner. Jac said her goodbyes and left Jonny with Hollie before she headed down to the bar where Cal, Charlie, Connie, Ethan, Jasmine, Mo and Sacha were all waiting. Jonny had decided he would join them at dinner once Hollie had been tucked up for the night. Tomorrow was going to be a big day for their little girl as well and they wanted to avoid her becoming overtired and crying in the middle of the ceremony. Sacha met her at the entrance.   
“You look stunning,” Sacha told Jac, kissing her on both cheeks. They linked arms as he led her to where the others were sitting.   
“What're you having?” Cal asked, rising from his seat. Jac looked around at the drinks.   
“Same as Sacha,” she replied. Cal nodded and disappeared off to the bar. She sat down close beside Sacha. “Did you manage to get through to Sam?” Jac asked, looking up at Connie.   
“Engaged,” replied Connie. “I left him a message, I don’t know what I was thinking.”   
“We all do things we regret,” chipped in Ethan. “Practically every day in my case,” he added, popping a bite-sized pretzel into his mouth.   
“I can’t believe you didn’t stop me,” Connie said to Jac, reproachfully.   
“I had other things on my mind,” Jac protested, exchanging a dark look with Mo. “Besides, you’re Connie Beauchamp. I thought you were above such petty things as drunken phone calls.” Connie smirked at her.  
“Ha, ha,” she said, and took a gulp of wine. Cal returned moments later, carrying a tray of fresh drinks for everybody. He lowered the tray onto the glass top of the table.   
“Budge up,” Cal said as he squeezed in between Ethan and Mo. 

“Hello? Anybody home?” Jeff called out as he climbed through the broken window into the kitchen. The sound of breaking glass did not appear to have roused anybody and Jeff wasn’t exactly being quiet as he stepped over the shards.   
“Jeffrey!” Shouted Dixie from outside. “Open the front door will yer?”   
“All right princess!’ Jeff yelled back at her. “Just give me a sec!” He walked across to the front door and lifted the latch so that Dixie could enter. As Dixie stepped in to the house, she wrinkled her nose in disgust.  
“Can you smell that?” She asked and as Jeff stopped to sniff the air, he realised what Dixie had meant.   
“What is that?” Dixie did not answer as she led the way towards the lounge.   
“Hello? Karen?” Dixie’s shouts met the same response that Jeff’s had. “I don’t like this Jeffrey,” said Dixie under her breath.   
“No, me neither,” replied Jeff, his neck prickling. They pushed open the door to the lounge and recoiled as the smell of urine and faeces wafted into their faces. The sofa was slightly askew and they saw that the TV had been left on standby. Everything else seemed to be in its rightful place but it was Jeff who first noticed the trail of blood leading from the sheepskin rug beside the fireplace. He nudged Dixie’s shoulder gently.  
“Oh my god,” Dixie mouthed. They followed the trail on tiptoes, taking care not to knock anything over that might disturb the evidence. Karen’s body was lying spreadeagled behind the sofa, her arms hanging uselessly and there were large gashes across her palms where she had obviously tried to fend off her attacker. Dixie knelt down beside Karen and checked her pulse. She was still alive, but only just. “Get the board now,” Dixie instructed Jeff. She looked across at Karen’s bloodied and mangled body. Whoever had done this, hadn’t just tried to kill her, they’d tried to butcher her. “Hurry up Jeffrey!” 

Anne-Marie pushed open the conservatory door and headed out into the garden. Joseph was standing beside a hydrangea bush, gazing up at the stars in silence.   
“I’d forgotten you used to love stargazing,” Anne-Marie said in a quiet voice. “It doesn’t seem so very long ago that you were still my little boy.” Joseph turned around.  
“What do you think I should do?” Anne-Marie saw that he was holding the wedding address in his right hand.   
“Have you considered that Jac might not want you there, that maybe she’s moved on with her life?” Joseph nodded. “Isn’t it about time you did the same?”   
“I have to tell her, I have to explain-“ Joseph began but he fell silent at the sorrowful look on his mother’s face.  
“Joseph, the time for explanations has passed. Such things should be left in the past where they belong.” Joseph thought about this for a moment; he looked back up at the sky, wondering what it would be like to journey across the constellations. He brought his gaze back level with his mother’s.   
“I don’t think I can let go until I’ve seen her,” he said, attempting to explain. “I don’t expect her to leave the guy and get back together and I’m not asking for that. I just need to tell her.” Anne-Marie put an arm around her son’s back.   
“Tell her what, Joseph?”   
“That I love her,” Joseph replied. Anne-Marie opened her mouth to object but Joseph cut across. “I don’t mean like that, I mean, I do love her in that way but that’s not the point. The point is, I’ve always loved her.” He glanced up at his mother and as Anne-Marie stared into his eyes, she finally understood what he meant.   
“Then you must do what you think is right, Joseph,” she said firmly. “I’ll drive you to the station.” 

“This is Karen Bradbury, query suspected knife attack,” Dixie said as Karen was wheeled through the double doors. Jeff hung back, his eyes narrowed. The rest of his face was in shadow.   
“Oh no,” Charlie mouthed as he caught sight of her. “Let’s get her into resus immediately!” Dixie grabbed his arm.  
“She crashed in the ambulance twice Charlie, it’s not looking good.” Charlie nodded and followed the path of the trolley to resus where Ash was already making an attempt to save her life. The whole department was on tenterhooks; nurses, doctors and porters stared through the glass into resus, their eyes widening in shock and horror at the image of Karen, lying motionless on one of the trolleys.   
“She’s gone into VF!” Ash charged the defibrillator up and once everybody had stepped aside, proceeded to try to shock Karen’s heart back into rhythm.   
“No change,” Charlie said, glancing at the monitors. Ash groaned as the resuscitation cycle began all over again. 

“So I’m in the middle of examining a patient,” Cal was saying loudly as the others tucked into their meals. “And this is a rectal examination,” he continued. Charlie snorted into her pasta, wincing as Jasmine elbowed her in the ribs. “And I hear the curtain being pulled back behind me and d’you know who was standing behind me?” They all shook their heads. “It was only Charlie Fairhead!” said Cal, laughing so hard that his eyes shone with tears. There was a brief tittering of approval amongst them, only Cal and Charlie laughed the loudest.   
“Your last night of freedom,” Ethan said to Jonny, leaning across the table to pick up the jar of mustard. “How’re you feeling?”   
“Excited,” replied Jonny. “It’s been a long time coming.”   
“Ethan was hoping you’d give Jac to him,” interjected Cal. Ethan turned bright red.  
“No I wasn’t,” he mumbled. “Ignore my brother.” He shot Cal a filthy look but his brother was now engrossed in a conversation with Connie. Sacha glanced around at Jac who had spent much of the dinner in silence, listening to the conversation but barely joining in with any of it. Her portions were small and every so often she would stare off into space as though lost in thoughtful contemplation. Sacha reached under the table and held her hand, squeezing her fingers gently.   
“How’re you doing?” He asked in a low whisper so that the others wouldn’t overhear them.   
“I’m fine,” Jac murmured back to him. “I’m just a little overwhelmed by all of this.” Sacha nodded, to show he understood what she meant.   
“Do you want to call it a night?” Jac thought about this for a few moments. She looked over at Jonny who was teasing Ethan riotously and then back at Sacha. She nodded. Sacha stood up and walked over to Jonny, tapping him lightly on the shoulder.   
“I’m just taking Jac up to her room,” he told him. “She’s feeling a little subdued.”   
“Okay,” said Jonny. He twisted his neck to look over at Jac as she tucked her chair under the table. “Get plenty of sleep, I’ll see you at the church tomorrow.” Jac didn’t say anything as Sacha led her away from the table. 

“You’re going to have the best day of your life tomorrow,” Sacha told her as he said goodnight to Jac outside her door. “And we’re all going to be there, cheering you both on.” Jac attempted to smile but her face refused to move. Sacha patted her right shoulder. “Nearly there Jac, nearly there.”   
“You should go back, the others will be wondering where you’ve got to,” Jac told him. Sacha shrugged.   
“Are you sure you’re all right?”   
“I’m fine honestly, go!” Sacha was about to head back downstairs when Jac threw her arms around him and hugged him as tight as she could.   
“What was that for?” Sacha asked, smiling broadly.  
“For being the best friend anyone could wish for,” replied Jac. 

The atmosphere in resus was gloomy, tense and the team worked in deep concentration. Ash’s brow glistened with sweat as they tried again and again to bring Karen back. A nurse stepped forward and wiped it away with a cloth.   
“This is the tenth cycle,” Charlie said. “She’s been a-systolic for sixty minutes with no response.” Ash said nothing, standing back as another nurse shone a light into Karen’s eyes. Her pupils were fixed and dilated. “Is everybody agreed?” Charlie looked around the room; everybody nodded apart from Ash who stared up at the clock in silence. “Time of death 20:48. Now I know this is hard when it’s one of us, but can I ask everybody to leave everything as it is? This is now a murder inquiry.” There was a murmur of agreement broken only by the sound of Ash punching the wall.  
“Dammit!” He exclaimed. Charlie ushered everyone away as he walked over to Ash.   
“It wasn’t your fault,” Charlie told him in his characteristically calm style. “Everyone did their best to try and save her.”  
“It wasn’t enough,” replied Ash darkly. He stared back at Karen, gazing at the mangled state of her body and the tubes that hung uselessly. “Who could have done that to her Charlie?” Charlie didn’t answer; there wasn’t any answer to give that would make the situation any more bearable. “It’s just barbaric.”   
“The police will catch whoever’s responsible,” Charlie told him. “We have to leave it to them now.” Ash snorted derisively.   
“They’ll be long gone by now,” he grumbled. 

Jac sat on the bed, cradling Hollie in her arms. It amazed her how much her daughter had grown in the last few months but to Jac, Hollie would always be her little girl no matter how big or tall she grew. Motherhood hadn’t been easy for Jac; it had taken a long time to get used to the struggle and dispel the belief that she wasn’t cut out for it. Things were easier now, however and Jac knew she had Jonny’s support. She stroked Hollie’s hair with the tip of her index finger.   
“Mummy’s big day tomorrow,” Jac said softly. Hollie opened her big green eyes but did not say anything as she looked up at her mother’s face. “I don’t know what to expect,” Jac continued, keeping her voice to a low whisper. She stood up, rocking Hollie gently from side to side as she walked towards the window. “See that?” Jac said, using Hollie’s finger to point at a collection of stars in the sky. “That’s the constellation of Andromeda,” Jac paused to watch Hollie. “People will tell you there’s all sorts of meanings and myths behind them but the truth is, they’re just stars Hollie.” Jac looked up from her daughter and stared out of the window at the constellation again. “Pretty to look at but they have no affect on our lives. The only person who can change the future is you.” Jac closed the blind and walked back to the cot, laying Hollie down among the sheets. “I love you,” Jac said as she tucked her daughter in. “You are the most precious thing in my life, the most precious thing.” Hollie lay awake, watching her mother through her round eyes. “I’ll read you a quick bedtime story,” said Jac. 

Joseph’s heart was racing as he rushed to catch the overnight train to Edinburgh. He had a stitch but that didn’t concern him as he shoved his ticket through the barrier and leapt onto the train, seconds before the doors closed. He thought back to what his mother had told him:  
“Be prepared Joseph,” Anne-Marie had said outside the station gates, holding Harry by the hand. “Don’t expect everything to go the way you planned.” Joseph considered this; he wasn't exactly sure what he had planned in the first place. He supposed he had the whole journey to Scotland to think of what he needed to say. “I’ll be glad to spend some time with little Harry,” Anne-Marie said as she kissed Joseph on the cheek.   
“I’ll be back as soon as I can,” said Joseph. “I love you,” He said as he bent down to say goodbye to his son.   
“Quickly Joseph or you’ll miss your train,” Anne-Marie warned him. Joseph nodded distractedly, shaking the rucksack of his belongings from side to side. Anne-Marie watched her son for a while as he sprinted through the station in search of his train. Once he had faded from her view, she turned and led Harry back to the car.   
Joseph had the first class carriage to himself and he lay across three seats, trying to sleep through as much of the journey as he could. The engine vibrations, coupled with the swirling of thoughts in Joseph’s mind made this impossible, however and he soon sat up. He picked up a copy of the Evening Standard that had been discarded on the seat behind him and proceeded to sift through its contents. He came across several articles of interest but none were enough to take his mind off things. One problem kept threatening to rear its ugly head: What if his mother was right and Jac wasn’t happy to see him. It was her wedding day after all. He thought back to the drama that had been caused by his inviting of Jac to his own wedding; his, now ex, wife had been fine with it but he remembered what Elliot had told him of Jac’s reaction. Joseph didn’t dare to hope that enough water had gone under the bridge since then, Jac had always been volatile but even though it had been some time since he’d last seen her, he still felt that he knew her well enough to make this decision. Joseph closed the paper and sat back in his seat. He drew the curtains, there was nothing to see in the darkness anyway. They had passed out of London and into deep countryside where there was little light to guide the way save for the light given out by the train itself. Joseph felt himself drifting into a deep sleep, his eyelids drooping in the gloom of the carriage. He was shaken awake a few minutes later by a skinny-looking ticket inspector.   
“Sorry to wake you sir,” the inspector said nervously and Joseph could tell from the look of him that he was new to the job and unsure of what he was doing. “Could I have your ticket?” Joseph reached under the paper and held his ticket up to the inspector who checked it with a tick across the date. “That seems to be in order,” he said, handing the ticket back to Joseph. “I hope you enjoy the rest of your journey.”   
“Thank you,” Joseph said blearily back at him and watched as the inspector opened the door at the other end of the carriage and stepped out of sight. 

Simon threw the rest of his clothes into an empty oil drum and doused them with a stream of petrol. Tossing the jerry can on to the snow, he reached into his pocket and drew out a box of matches. His eyes were ablaze with a manic insanity and he seemed to be sniffing the aroma given off by the petrol. He knew by now that Karen had been discovered; the story of her murder had been given its own slot on the 10 o’clock news but there was nothing linking him to her. And once he had disposed of this, there would be no evidence left at all. It would be as if her attacker had simply melted away into the night. He struck the match and stared as the end erupted into a bright yellow flame. He held it in his hand for a moment, allowing the flame to snake its way up the thin wood. When it was nearly at his fingers and he could feel the heat of the flame, Simon dropped it into the oil drum.   
The clothes erupted immediately as the fire came in contact with the life-giving petrol. The flames crackled and roared, licking up every inch of material they came in contact with. Simon watched the dark grey smoke rise into the night sky, the smell of burning fabric filling his nostrils and lungs. It was a beautiful sight to behold, Simon thought as he stirred the charred remains. There would be so much beauty to gaze at tomorrow, he told himself. Nothing was going to stand in his way this time, no doctors, nurses, not his family. If he had to die then he was going to take them all with him. That was the only way, that was how this was going to end. Simon took out a creased photo from his coat pocket and held it above the fire. He stared at the picture; Jasmine’s face was smiling up at him, a memory of a happier time when things had been so much less complicated. Simon would have been lying if he’d said he hadn’t felt the tiniest pangs of regret as he gazed into the photographic eyes of his daughter. It wasn’t enough, however and Simon promptly dropped the photo into the crackling flames. It was consumed in an instant, the edges curling up until the whole picture collapsed into a pile of lifeless ash.   
“Burn, baby, burn,” Simon whispered. He looked at his watch; the arrow had just ticked past midnight. “Happy wedding day.” 

TO BE CONTINUED


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

PART TWENTY-NINE: THE FINALE (PART ONE)

Sunday 18th January - The Wedding 

As the sun rose over the buildings and streets of Edinburgh, encased in a silvery white sheet of freshly fallen snow, Jac Naylor stretched and climbed delicately out of her bed. It still seemed to be relatively early and the sun’s rays appeared weak and feeble as they shone through the gap in the blinds. Jac opened her eyes but her vision was blurred and her head was spinning in the way it does when one has only just woken. She looked over at the empty section of bed where Jonny had slept the other night; she knew what his traditions meant to him but there was still a tiny part of Jac that had hoped she would wake up beside her fiancé. Fiancé. That was a peculiar word, Jac thought as she tiptoed over to the bathroom, taking care not to wake Hollie. She stepped inside, closing the door with a gentle click behind her.   
After her brief but necessary shower, Jac stood and stared at her pale cheekbones in the mirror, her towel wrapped up like a turban around her sodden hair. It didn’t seem quite real that by the evening she would officially be a married woman. Of course she was still going to be Jac Naylor, that would never change and as she had pointed out to Jonny in the, rather heated discussion over it, Jac Maconie really didn’t work at all. Jonny had tried to persuade her as best he could but in the end he had conceded defeat, on the condition that he didn’t have to change his name to Naylor.   
Jac almost cracked a smile. She picked up her toothbrush from the small jar on top of the sink and poured a copious amount of toothpaste on to the bristles. As she turned the cold tap and watched the water swirling down into the plug hole there was a sudden knock at the door.   
“Hang on!” Jac called through a mouth of toothpaste. She quickly finished the tedious task and spat the remainder into the sink. Wiping her mouth with a tissue, Jac ran to the door just as the visitor knocked again. “I’m coming!” Jac pulled open the front door, breathlessly and staring up into Sacha’s face, she suddenly realised that she was still in her night clothes.   
“Thought I’d just pop in and see you before the big event,” said Sacha who was already dressed in his dark grey tux and sporting a black bow tie. Jac ushered him into the room, instructing Sacha to keep the noise as low as possible. There was the tiniest of gurgles from Hollie’s cot; Jac instinctively looked over to her daughter but the little girl just rolled over and continued sleeping. She looked so peaceful.   
“What time is it?” Jac asked, staring out of the window at the now blazing daylight. Sacha checked his watch.  
“About half ten,” Sacha told her. Jac’s eyes widened in shock.   
“Are you saying I’ve only got four hours before I have to be walking down that aisle?”   
“Plenty of time,” said Sacha, trying to reassure her. Jac was not, however reassured by that in the slightest. Waves of panic began to wash over her and she was hyperventilating.   
“I was meant to be having my hair done at ten,” said Jac in horror. “Why didn’t anyone wake me?” Sacha did his best to calm her.  
“It’s okay Jac, it’s okay. Mo’s bringing the stylist with her at eleven. We’ll get you to the church on time,” Sacha said in his jovial manner.   
“If you’re going to sing, I may throw up,” Jac gave him a watery smile but it was enough for Sacha. She sat down at the dresser and began to apply her makeup. “Have you heard any more about Karen?” Jac asked over the sound of her hairdryer. Her voice was hollow; the news of Karen’s murder had reached them late the previous night and the atmosphere in the hotel was still melancholic. Sacha sighed deeply; it had come as a great shock to him and he still couldn’t believe how anyone could have had the audacity to do something as mindbogglingly terrible as that to her.   
“There was something on the radio this morning,” replied Sacha. “Police are appealing for anybody with information to come forward, the usual stuff.” Jac flicked the switch on the dryer and laid it aside.   
“Someone forced their way into her home,” Jac said as she began to straighten her hair. “They were probably waiting for her when she came back after her shift,” Sacha bit his tongue uncomfortably, listening to Jac as she aired her thoughts out loud. “Waiting for her and when they got their chance, they attacked and left her to rot. Do you know what I think, Sacha?” The sudden question caught Sacha off guard and it took him a few moments to gather his wits and reply.  
“Probably not.”   
“I’d bet you anything it was a patient.”  
“Come on Jac, you don’t really think a-“   
“Honestly Sacha, you know as well as I do that there are some right nutters out there and they’re violent and yes, capable of that. I’d definitely put a bet on the culprit being a patient that she somehow pissed off or maybe they just didn’t like her choice in hats.” Sacha couldn’t think of anything to say to this, so her just laughed instead. Jac was right; patients were known for their unpredictability.   
“Shall we talk about something else?” Jac nodded, moving on to the next stage in her mission to make herself look as good as possible for the wedding. “There’s something I need to tell you.” Jac looked round at Sacha, raising an eyebrow in surprise. “I don’t want everybody knowing so can we just keep this between ourselves?”  
“You can trust me, what are you going on about Sacha?” Sacha paused, struggling to find the right words to explain his predicament. He wasn’t sure why he was going to tell Jac but there was something at the back of his mind. Something that made him want to unload all of his secrets before the day was out. Evidently something on his face had given away how he was feeling for he suddenly noticed that Jac was staring directly at him, her eyes lined with worry. “Sacha what is it?” He hadn’t realised how soft Jac’s voice could be before now. It was the sort of voice you could listen to all day long and never grow tired of, eloquent and cultured.   
“It’s nothing,” Sacha said; it wasn’t the right time to tell her. “I’ll tell you after the reception.”   
“Okay,” said Jac doubtfully. She knew Sacha would tell her in his own time but she cared a great deal about the bumbling surgeon and she worried for his wellbeing. Sacha made to walk back towards the main door.  
“I should get going,” he mumbled. “Pick you up at half one.” Jac nodded, smiling as Sacha retreated from the room. She could hear his footsteps walking hurriedly along the corridor outside until they disappeared down the spiral staircase and she couldn’t hear anything any more. 

The mood in Ash’s office was a sombre one. He was sitting at his desk, staring down at the mountain of forms and other paperwork whilst Charlie Fairhead stood in solemn conversation with Detective Inspector Yates. Every few moments, Ash would be called upon to impart his role in the events of Karen’s death but he mostly observed in silence. Yates was a tall, stocky man with impressively broad shoulders and a crewcut head of hair. There were patches over his forearms exposed by his wearing of a short-sleeved shirt. His chin was obscured by two-day stubble and Ash couldn’t help noticing how cold his blue eyes were. There was no feeling in them; Ash felt uneasy and he quickly looked back down at the topmost form.   
“Who found Ms. Bradbury?” Yates asked in his gravelly voice.   
“Er that would be two of our paramedics, Jeff Collier and Kathleen Dixon,” replied Charlie. Yates scribbled the names down into his notepad, muttering aloud.   
“Where might I find them?” Yates jumped as Ash tore a form vigorously and threw it into the recycling basket beside him.   
“The ambulance bay, it’s not far from here,” Charlie started to explain but Yates informed him that he already knew where the ambulance bay was. “Oh right, sometimes people do get a little confused,” clarified Charlie.   
“Confusion is not on my schedule,” replied Yates. Ash rolled his eyes behind them. “So Mr. Ashford,” Yates rounded on Ash.   
“Can I help you?” asked Ash, blinking. “It’s just that I do have rather a lot of paperwork to get through today.”   
“This will only take a second,” Yates told him smugly.   
“Best get it over with Ash,” Charlie told him, patting his friend on the back. Ash nodded, relenting. Yates flipped his notebook onto a new page and held his pencil between his thumb and forefinger, ready to scribble at a moment’s notice.   
“Right, Mr. Ashford, can you tell me where you were between the hours of ten and six yesterday?”   
“On shift,” Ash replied.   
“Can anyone vouch for that?”   
“Yes,” interrupted Charlie before Ash could answer. “Ash was in the department all day. What line of inquiry is this?”   
“Just doing my job,” replied Yates with a shrug. His reputation often preceded him wherever he went and Detective Inspector Alistair Yates was not popular among his colleagues at Holby South. His methods were unusual but no one could ever deny that he got the job done. A growing concern, however was his tendency to launch wild accusations at those he interviewed but when questioned over it, Yates would stare at them with his unfeeling eyes and reel out some spiel about it being a necessary pursuit of inquiry. Even so, his methods had not gone unnoticed and despite his long service, Yates had never been able to rise higher than DI. This was a fact that still dealt a bitter blow to him whenever it was brought up. “You were the Consultant treating Ms. Bradbury, am I correct?”   
“You’re correct.”   
“What state would you say Ms. Bradbury was in when she arrived into your care?” Ash watched as Yates scribbled something in his notebook.   
“She wasn’t good,” Ash started to explain. “She’d gone into VF, that’s ventricular fibrillation and we had to restore her heart into a normal rhythm.”   
“I see,” Yates muttered, making yet another brief note. “And how long after she was brought in, did Ms. Bradbury die?” Yates considered this carefully, thinking back to what time it had been when Jeff and Dixie brought her in. He counted the hours on his fingertips.   
“I suppose it must have been two or three hours,” Ash said, looking up at Yates. “We managed to get her back several times but her injuries were too severe and she suffered a catastrophic cardiac arrest.”  
“When did you pronounce the time of death?” Charlie whispered in Yates’ ear and the Detective Inspector wrote down the time. “Was Ms. Bradbury seeing anybody recently? Had she brought a new man round, that sort of thing?” Ash shook his head.  
“Not that I know of,” he explained. He looked over at Charlie but the nurse just shrugged his shoulders.   
“What about her relationship with patients?”   
“She was good at her job,” Ash told him. “Bloody good in fact.”   
“Is there anyone who might hold a grudge against Ms. Bradbury?” Ash and Charlie both thought about this but they concluded that they knew of no one who might harbour any kind of grudge against her. “No tensions in working relationships?”   
“She was a popular member of staff,” Charlie said firmly. “No one here is capable of that.”   
“Hmm,” Yates said. He was not convinced by the familiar ‘popularity’ schtick. “Well I had better continue with my inquiries, I think I’ll talk to this Jeff Collier,” Yates was talking to himself more than anyone else as he flipped his notebook shut. He thanked Ash and Charlie for their time and marched out of the office. Charlie looked down at Ash.  
“Are you all right?”   
“I’m fine Charlie,” Ash said, his chest heaving up and down. “That man just gets under my skin.”   
“I know,” Charlie said and he shivered deliberately. “Bleurgh. I’d hate to work under him.”   
“Did you get much sleep?” Ash asked.  
“Me? Not a wink.”   
“Me neither,” they both sighed. 

It was nearly half past two and the small church had begun to fill up rapidly, the pews filled with rows and rows of expectant guests, most of which were members of Jonny’s family as well family and friends of their friends and friends of their friends’ friends and so on until the church had almost reached full capacity. Jonny took his place, with Ethan standing beside him and a hushed silence fell about the church, broken only by an outburst of excited mutterings from certain members of the crowd.   
“Five minutes,” Ethan whispered to Jonny. They both began to grow extremely tense and Jonny could feel his knees knocking together. “Good luck.”   
“Nothing prepares you for this,” Jonny whispered back. “I’ve been calm all the way through the engagement and now looking at me, quaking like a wee boy.”   
“Just so long as you don’t throw up on her, you’ll be fine,” said Ethan.   
“Yeah that’s actually not very helpful thanks,” Jonny muttered. He checked the time. “This is the longest five minutes of my entire life.” Ethan said nothing, his eyes fixed upon the double doors at the front of the church. “Have you got the rings?” Jonny asked, struck by a sudden thought. Ethan slipped his hand in his pocket and felt around for the rings. There was a brief moment of panic in his eyes but his fingers soon came into contact with the rings and he sighed with relief.   
“I’ve got them,” he told Jonny. Jonny was about to say something else when the doors swung open and, standing at the top of the aisle, he could see Jac.   
“She looks absolutely beautiful,” Jonny mouthed to Ethan. Ethan, however was too stunned to answer and he simply stared in wonder as Jac began to walk down the aisle, her arm linked with Sacha’s and her bridal gown flowing behind her. Jac’s hair was held up and tied into a luxuries bun and her features sparkled in the light of the church as though she was giving off a kind of glow.   
Once Jac had taken her place opposite Jonny, the priest stepped forward and began the service.   
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to witness the union of these two people in the eyes of God, in holy matrimony, and to celebrate with them as they solidify their love for the future.” Jac reached out for Jonny’s left hand and Jonny took hold of her right hand.  
“This is it,” Jonny told her. Jac smiled, daring not to speak. She felt as if she would throw up all over the church if she so much as opened her mouth. Her heart was beating faster than it had ever done before, a rapid drumbeat that built up quicker and quicker until it couldn’t possibly go any faster. Jac soaked in the weight of expectation of everyone her and this did little to calm her nerves, only Sacha seemed to offer any sense of tranquility.   
“If anyone knows of any lawful impediment why these people should not be joined in marriage, may they speak now or forever hold their peace.” The church was silent and it soon became clear that no one had any reason to stop the wedding. Sacha kept checking behind him but no one came running through those doors. The priest smiled toothily and continued the service. They proceeded through the vows with ease, although Jac stumbled a bit over one or two of them. There was a minor kerfuffle when Ethan managed to get one of the rings stuck in the fabric of his jacket pocket. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” Jac and leant forwards into each other and their lips locked together in a long and passionate kiss.   
The church erupted into raucous rounds of applause filled with whistles and cheers. Sacha beamed with pride, tears streamed down Mo, Jasmine and Charlie’s faces and Cal gave the loudest and most enthusiastic cheer of anybody. As Jac and Jonny made their way down the aisle, Connie clapped Jac on the back and said:  
“Well done Naylor.” Jac grinned. She was married now and everything was going to be all right. Elliot appeared beside her. He passed Hollie over for Connie to hold.   
“I just wanted to offer you my sincerest congratulations,” he told them. “I’m so happy for you both.” Elliot hugged Jac and then Jonny in turn.   
They headed out into the bright afternoon sunshine; Jac held the bouquet in one hand, her other hand was clutched in Jonny’s, and the watching crowd waited with baited breath for her to throw the flowers into the air. They were sprinkled with confetti by Cal and Charlie and the sheer joviality of the occasion was infectious. Everywhere Jac looked she could see tears of joy streaming down people’s faces and she soon realised that she was crying just as hard as the emotion swept over her. It was a dream, Jac told herself. It had to be a dream; the best dream she had ever had and she would wake up the next morning to find it all back to normal. But it wasn’t a dream. It was very much real life and Jac felt overwhelmed as people continued to march up to them in their droves to wish them both a hearty congratulations. She was too struck by it all to answer and so it was Jonny who did most of the talking.   
“Come on Naylor,” Mo called out to them. “Throw the bouquet, we’re all waiting here!” Jac let go of Jonny’s hand and prepared to throw the bouquet as hard as she could into the air.   
“One,” Jac swung the bouquet but did not let go. The crowd gasped and then laughed as they realised Jac had only been teasing them. “Two,” she swung the bouquet higher but still she did not let go. Jac grinned, enjoying the spell she had the crowd under. They all looked just about ready to burst from anticipation as Jac cried: “Three,” and released the bouquet into the sky. It soared through the air and there was a frantic scrambling as they all moved forward, desperate to be the one who caught the flowers. Mo reached out and grabbed at the air but it was Jasmine who proved victorious, leaping higher than she had ever leapt before and clutching the flowers by the bottom of their stalks. Jac and Jonny turned back to look at each other, both were laughing, both were happy.   
“Your car awaits,” announced Mo, parting the crowd so that the couple could see the luxurious white vehicle that had just pulled up outside the church. Jac led Jonny by the arm through the crowd to the car. Their ears ringing from the deafening cheers all around them. 

Jeff slammed his locker shut angrily. His knuckles stung but he didn’t care as he glared at his own reflection in the metal. It felt like Polly all over again and Jeff was tired of being powerless to prevent these things from happening.   
“Do you want a cup of tea or something?” Detective Inspector Yates droned, watching Jeff with his eyes narrowed so tightly that they were barely even open at all.   
“No I do not want!” Jeff began a little more aggressively than he had intended. He stopped to catch his breath. “I don’t want a cup of tea thank you,” he finished. His outburst, however had not been overlooked by the DI who made a careful note of it in his leather notebook.   
“Shall we step into the office?” Jeff nodded and led the way. “Is Kathleen Dixon around?” Yates asked as he followed Jeff into the main office. Jeff shook his head.   
“Dixie’s on a shout,” he explained. “She could be back any time but I wouldn’t like to say, d’you know what I mean?” Yates nodded, smiling briskly.   
“Oh yes of course, of course. Work has to come first,” he conceded.   
“I’m glad you see it that way,” Jeff replied, offering Yates a seat. Yates took the seat obligingly and placed his notebook on the table in front of him. Jeff watched him curiously, he wasn’t quite sure what to make of the Detective just yet.   
“I know this is difficult,” Yates started to say but he was distracted by Jeff’s erratic fidgeting. “Aren’t you going to sit?”  
“Nah, I prefer to stand,” Jeff told him.   
“Ah, right. Okay then. As I was saying,” Yates began again. “I know this is an extremely delicate situation but I just need to go over a few of the details with you, if that’s okay?” Jeff nodded to show that it was; he was doing his level-best to keep a lid on his temper. He got the feeling that lashing out at this man would be a mistake he would almost certainly have to pay for.   
Yates was silent for a moment as he glanced through his notebook, looking over the information he had gained from Charlie and Ash that morning. He gazed up at Jeff and then began to write copiously. Jeff eyed him; his brow was sweating and his heart thumped loudly. He wonder what Yates was writing and whether or not he was making a deduction about him. After a while, Yates laid down his pencil and cleared his throat.   
“You and Kathleen Dixon were the first to discover Ms. Bradbury, correct?”   
“Yes, I don’t know. I think so,” Jeff said, tensing in the glare of Yates’ blue eyes. “Yes, we were.” He didn’t know what had made him almost fall to pieces like that; it made him feel uneasy and Jeff knew that, no matter how good Yates might be at his job, he didn’t trust him.   
“I looked at the records, you were both off shift when you found her and there’s no evidence of you being called to be there,” said Yates, staring directly at Jeff until the paramedic felt himself backing away slightly. “So my question is this: Why were you there?” Jeff frowned. He knew that whatever he said would no doubt be twisted into something vastly unrecognisable from the truth.   
“Charlie Fairhead asked us to take a look,” said Jeff after a brief consideration. Yates made a noise that sounded halfway between a thoughtful ‘hmm’ and a snort of derision.   
“Why was that?” Yates asked, making a fresh note. Jeff leaned over to see what he was writing, but Yates moved his hand across so that it was obscured by the shadow. “Why did Mr. Fairhead want you to check on her? You were off shift, the whereabouts of hospital staff is not your concern, I would have thought.” Jeff scowled.   
“Charlie asked us to do him a favour because we were off shift. You may not understand this but round here, we’re a team and we stick together.” Jeff’s temper was raging inside him and he gripped the sideboard behind him to stop himself from punching Yates.   
“Do you know why Charlie was concerned about Ms. Bradbury’s whereabouts?”   
“Err yeah, I do as it happens. Karen hadn’t shown up for her shift and-“  
“Missing a shift is hardly unusual is it?” Yates said, cutting across Jeff mid-sentence.   
“Karen never missed a shift. Ever. I’m not exaggerating here,” said Jeff. “She was Mrs. Punctuality.” Yates’ lips thinned as he scribbled yet another note down.   
“What did you discover when you arrived at the house?” He asked when he had finished writing. Jeff looked down at the floor, deep in thought.   
“From the outside everything seemed normal,” Jeff said at last. Yates opened his mouth to speak but then seemed to think better of it and crossed his arms, waiting for Jeff to continue. “It soon became apparent that something was up, like it didn’t feel right.”  
“What did you do?”   
“I picked up a stone and broke in.”   
“Are paramedics allowed to force entry?” Yates asked, frowning.   
“Yes when the situation calls for it.” Yates closed his notebook with a snap and rose to his feet.  
“Thank you for your time Mr. Collier, I’ll be in touch.” Jeff didn’t reply. “I’ll see myself out.” 

Joseph watched as the wedding guests continued to pile into the hotel for the reception. He still clutched the address Sacha had given him in his hand although it had become crinkled and faded in the time that had passed. It had taken a lot for Joseph to decide not to go to the actual wedding ceremony and he had come very close to bursting through the church doors. Yet when it had come down to it, Joseph found that he did not have the heart to interrupt Jac’s wedding, no matter how important what he had to say was. This was Jac’s special day, a day that she had craved for so long.   
“Oi watch it!” Joseph looked around as someone wearing a black hoodie brushed past him, carrying what looked like a particularly heavy bag. He glanced angrily after the retreating figure but he quickly regained his composure and tried to forget about it. It was probably just a guest arriving to stay, Joseph thought. Even so, the man had seemed to be in an awful hurry and there had been noticeable panic in his voice when he’d spoken. Joseph shrugged it off. There was no use dwelling on it, everyone had bad days and there were far more vital things to think about: Such as, whether or not he was going to be able to pluck up the courage to go inside and see Jac.   
Joseph took a step forwards gingerly; his heart leapt. He was an inch closer to the door. That had to be an achievement in itself. He took another step. He kept walking forward until he found himself in the entrance lobby of the hotel. He sidled up to the reception desk.  
“Excuse me, I was looking for the wedding reception. I was told it was here,” said Joseph uncertainly. The receptionist looked up from her computer screen, giving Joseph an eyeful of her round overlarge earrings.   
“It’s just through those doors over there,” the receptionist explained, pointing with a pink-nailed finger.   
“Thank you,” Joseph said, taking a deep breath before he walked over to the reception. The receptionist tutted behind him and returned to the game she was playing on the computer.   
“Bollocks,” the receptionist exclaimed a little louder than she had intended but in fairness she had just died in the game for the tenth time in a row. 

Simon smirked as he looked all around the hotel kitchen. He couldn’t believe he’d managed to wing his way onto the kitchen staff. He didn’t have to do much either, they had plenty of waiters and chefs. All Simon had to do was clean up any messes and make sure everything was shipshape. Other than that, he had free reign to continue with the finer parts of his scheme. There had been a brief moment where he had thought he would be caught outside the hotel but the man he had bumped into didn’t seem to have paid him much attention.   
“Are you deaf mate?” Simon looked around to see the head chef hollering at him. “Clear that fucking mess up!” Simon gave the head chef an obedient smile and went to collect the dustpan and brush from Eric who had used it last. As he bent down to scoop up the mess of salmon and broccoli, Simon scowled.   
“I can’t wait to see your face,” he murmured to himself. Just at that moment there was a loud clattering and Simon looked up to see a saucepan facedown by Eric’s feet.   
“Are you a fucking useless shit or what?” Within seconds the head chef was standing in front of Eric, berating him as loud as he could.   
“My finger slipped,” Eric replied in his thick Glaswegian accent.   
“Clear it up but I kick you out,” the head chef replied and stomped away to bully somebody else.   
The kitchen was becoming increasingly hectic and in the commotion caused by pots, pans and trays being unceremoniously thrown to the floor, stepped in or dropped, Simon quietly slipped into the side room where his bag had been stashed. No one saw him. 

Ethan sat down to tumultuous applause as he concluded his best man speech. Even Cal looked impressed and a huge weight was lifted from Ethan’s mind.   
“You did well,” Jonny said, clapping Ethan on the back. “Although I wasn’t quite sure about some of the jokes.”   
“I made them up as I was going along,” Ethan admitted.  
“Well people seemed to enjoy them, so well done.” Jonny turned to look at his wife but Jac’s face had turned the whitest of whites. “Jac are you okay?” Jac didn’t answer. Jonny nudged her gently. “Jac?”   
“Jac,” Jonny glanced around and his eyes met with Joseph’s. Although they had never met, Jonny knew the legendary cardiothoracic registrar by sight and he was definitely not pleased to see him standing there before them. Joseph seemed to look straight through him, however and it was this blatant disregard that enraged Jonny further. “Jac?” Joseph said again, but it was more of a question this time. Jac still did not answer.   
“She doesn’t want you here,” Jonny said. Ethan stared at them, unaware of the history. “I think you should leave.”   
“I’m not here to take your wife from you,” Joseph explained. “I just need to talk to Jac.” At this, Jac finally spoke.  
“Why.” It wasn’t a question. It was just a quiet, helpless plea. 

Charlie ran into Ash’s office, exclaiming out loud. He was followed closely by Yates whose lips remained tightly shut. Ash looked up in surprise at them. It took a lot to get Charlie this active and by the presence of Yates, Ash determined that some kind of breakthrough must have happened.   
“We’ve just checked over the CCTV,” Charlie explained. Ash stared at him questioningly. “It shows a man following Karen to her car.”   
“Is there a clear shot of the man?” Asked Ash. Yates nodded.   
“We’ve run the image through our networks and we’re fairly positive that this man is Simon Burrows.” Ash frowned, the name seemed familiar to him. It soon became clear when Charlie explained everything he knew of the man to Yates.   
“Do we know where he might be now?” Yates asked. Charlie shook his head.   
“He could be anywhere.”   
“We’ll double the search, contact all local police authorities, send out a nationwide hunt.” The three men piled out of the office. “I’ll let you know as soon as there’s any information,” Yates told them as he walked away.   
“Do you think they’ll find him?” Charlie thought about this. He didn’t want to give anyone false hope but at the same time it was the first piece of good news that had come since it all began.  
“I hope so,” he said at last. 

Jac and Joseph stepped into a private room; Jac’s face was contorted with rage and Joseph knew that he deserved it.   
“What the hell Joseph? What the hell?” Joseph cleared his throat but before he could speak, Jac raged at him again. “I’m married! Did you think you could just show up here out of the blue and I would run off with you again?”   
“Jac listen to me, you have to let me explain,” Joseph pleaded. “I’m not here to take you back, you’ve moved on with your life and I’m glad that you’re happy.” Jac slammed her hand on to the door.  
“Yes, I am happy!” She paused, allowing her words to sink in. “And that’s what you couldn’t stand isn’t it Joseph? You couldn’t stand that I have made something of my life without you!” She seethed with fury and the glint in her eyes was such that it would have made a stronger man than Joseph quiver in its wake.   
“You have to listen to me,” Joseph pleaded again. Jac rounded on him.  
“I don’t have to listen to anything you say! You lost that right when you walked away from me.” Joseph said nothing, after all, Jac did have a point. There wasn’t a day went by that Joseph didn’t bitterly regret having to leave Jac behind.   
“Jac, please. I just want to talk. Can we not be civil?” Jac was about to retaliate when she caught the look in Joseph’s eyes. Her anger seemed to melt away and it was as if she had been transported back to the last time she had laid eyes on her ex. She twisted the wedding ring on her finger absentmindedly.  
“Okay Joseph, you win. We can talk.” 

Simon had waited until he was alone in the kitchen with the head chef. He knew he had only a few minutes to carry out his plan before the others returned. Simon felt his hands curling around the handle of a white hot frying pan. The head chef’s back was facing him and when he didn’t react to Simon’s movement, Simon took his chance and swung the pan as hard as he could at the old man’s head. The crunch was both sickening and satisfying as Simon watched him fall to the floor, dead.   
Simon picked up the jerry can he had hidden under the counter and began to pour petrol all over the kitchen floor and over the sides. He drenched the gas cookers and canisters in it and, out of spite, poured some over the head chef’s lifeless body. When the jerry can was empty, Simon tossed it aside with a loud clatter and reached into his pocket for his matches. His heart was racing and part of him tried to hold back but it was too late. He had gone too far this time. He turned on the gas to maximum and basked in the low hiss that filled the air. 

“It’s not fair Joseph,” Jac said quietly. “You can’t just show up here like this.” Joseph sighed.   
“I didn’t know what else to do,” Joseph admitted. “I just had to see you.” Jac walked over to him and held his hand, squeezing his fingers between hers.   
“You shouldn’t have come here.” They gazed up into each other’s eyes and for a moment it looked as if their old passions had been reignited. The door opened behind them and they broke apart quickly.   
“Sorry,” said Sacha. “I just wanted to explain,” Jac looked at him, her eyes widening in surprise.   
“Explain what exactly?” Sacha took a deep breath.   
“I told Joseph where to find you.” The colour drained from Jac’s face and Sacha recoiled at the look of betrayal in Jac’s eyes. She was standing directly in front of him now.   
“I trusted you,” Jac whispered.   
“I know and I’m sorry, I was trying to do the best thing for both of you. You have to believe that Jac.” Jac shook her head slowly, tears ringing in her eyes.   
“Just stop it Sacha. Just stop it.” Sacha wanted to explain, to tell her that it wasn’t how it seemed but when he opened his mouth, no words came out and his heart continued to shrivel up inside him. “I trusted you,” Jac said again and with a single movement, she slapped Sacha across the cheek. The injury stung but Sacha did not react.   
“I’m sorry.” Jac’s anger flared up inside her again.   
“You’re sorry?” She slapped him again, this time across the other cheek. “Sorry isn’t good enough!” She kept hitting him. “You’ve ruined everything Sacha! I thought I had it all sorted but you had to bring him here, you had to drag up the past!”   
“Jac,” Joseph began but she ignored him. She stopped hitting Sacha and drew away from him, her face lined with mascara.   
“I can’t even look at you any more,” she said in a low whisper. “You went behind my back. You should have asked me. Just go, Sacha. I want you to go.” Sacha looked from Jac to Joseph, his face crestfallen and a terrible pain building in his heart.   
“Jac…” Jac was forcing herself not to look at him but he knew she was crying.   
“Go,” Jac said again. Sacha felt as if his soul had been torn into a thousand pieces and it seemed as if there would never be any way of repairing the mess he had caused. Joseph was silent; he hadn’t stepped up to defend him but Sacha didn’t blame him. It wasn’t Joseph’s fault. Sacha walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. His hands trembled on the door handle and he hoped that no one would see the emotion in his expression. 

Simon struck the match, admiring the yellow flame with a sadistic grin on his face before dropping it on to the trail of petrol. He pushed back through the doors before the flaming trail could ignite the gas. He intended to die tonight but now wasn’t the time for that. He pulled the petrol-stained hoodie over his head and and threw it on to the floor. Simon was safely away from the kitchen now and it filled him with glee to think of the crackling flames burning there, licking around the corpse of the head chef. He had deserved to die, Simon thought. It was somehow right that the sanctimonious bastard had been the first to go. He wouldn’t be the last either.   
None of the wedding guests seemed to have any idea of what was going on, they just danced or talked and ate. It surprised him how easy it was for him to mingle among the guests without anyone questioning who he was. They were probably sloshed. Simon laughed as he picked up a glass of wine from a tray left on a table. He downed it and smirked. The fireworks would soon be beginning. Perhaps he could give it a little helping hand, Simon thought as he approached the long flowing curtains at the back of the vast room and whilst everyone’s heads were turned the other way, he struck a fresh match and dropped it at the curtain’s hem. 

Sacha made his way along the corridor towards the lobby in silence. He had mumbled an apology to Jonny before leaving but he couldn’t spend another minute in that room. His insides felt as if they had been taken out of him, scrambled around and stuffed unceremoniously back into his stomach. His heart was in his mouth. 

“Can you smell burning?” Cal asked, sniffing the air. Mo screwed up her nose and the aroma of smoke filled her sinuses. “We need to warn everyone,” Cal muttered. But before they could say anything there was a screech of terror behind them and they turned to see a wall of flame where the curtains had been. Guests were running everywhere, knocking into tables and each other. Panic had descended and it was fast becoming total chaos.   
“We need to call the fire brigade,” Mo hissed at Cal but as Cal opened his mouth to reply he found himself being thrown away from Mo by the rampaging crowd. Tables were being upturned and the flames were licking across the domed ceiling towards the magnificent chandelier in the centre. Cal was drawing near to the kitchen now and he could see the black smoke floating up underneath the thick wooden doors. His heart dropped through the pit of his stomach and he began to back away.   
“Keep away from the kitchen!” Cal yelled but it was too late. He could only cry out in horror as one of the waiters wrenched open the door and the whole building exploded in fire and debris. The force of the explosion threw Cal backwards. He fell, hitting his head hard on one of the upturned table legs and the last thing he saw before he lost consciousness were the charred remains of the waiter. 

“What was that?” The sound of the explosion had been muffled but Jac and Joseph could smell the smoke and feel the heat of the flames from where they stood. Jac tried the door but something had fallen in front of it and it was stuck fast. “We’re trapped,” Jac said as she turned back to face Joseph. They fell silent, trying to listen for the sound of anybody nearby but all they could hear were bloodcurdling screams. Joseph clenched his hands into fists; his heart was pounding but he didn’t want Jac to see that he was afraid. Jac could see right through him, however and as they listened to the flames drawing closer outside, she grabbed him and pulled his body closer to hers.   
“They’ll find us,” Joseph whispered. “I’m sure they’ll find us.” Jac knew he was trying to reassure her but she had no answer to give. 

The chandelier, enveloped in bright flames, creaked suddenly and Cal looked up at the ceiling. His expression was pained and he could barely see through the splitting headache he had received from smacking the table leg. He didn’t know how long he had been out for and nobody seemed to have noticed him lying there. It hardly mattered, the only exit had collapsed in on itself and they were all trapped together. The chandelier gave another threatening creak…

TO BE CONCLUDED


	30. Chapter Thirty

PART THIRTY: THE FINALE (PART TWO)

Cal opened his eyes. The chandelier was still hanging precariously over him but the important thing was that it hadn’t fallen yet. His head throbbed but he knew he had to move. The entire ceiling looked as if it were about to cave in on itself and Cal didn’t fancy being trapped underneath when it did. He coughed, his lungs groaning under the heat of the fire and the smoke but he felt strong enough to move his body away and clamber unsteadily to his feet. He looked around. He could hear people screaming but his vision was obscured by the steady stream of thick black smoke. His first instinct was to call for his brother but Ethan either could not or would not reply. A thousand different scenarios, each more terrible than the last, floated through Cal’s mind.   
“Ethan!” Cal called out again and he knew it was no use but he had to do something. “Can anyone hear me,” but the sound of his voice was drowned out by an almighty crash behind him; it shook the floor and Cal instinctively dived for cover. He pulled himself back up, his ears ringing and his eyes were red and stinging. He looked around and saw that the chandelier had given way at last, smothering the heated floor with shards of jagged glass. The main body lay directly on top of where Cal had been lying and he felt his heart skip a beat. He took a deep breath, desperate to keep on top of the situation. He couldn’t think, however and he was walking blind through the smoke. All around him, Cal could hear the fire raging and more than once he had stopped himself just as a pile of masonry had crashed down from the ceiling.   
Cal gathered his courage and took a step forward. His front food skidded on a blackened chair leg; he stuck his hands out to break his fall but as Cal looked down he saw that he was gazing into the charred face of one of the waiters. The whole left side of his face had been burnt away and Cal felt his stomach churning as the smell filled his nostrils. He glanced down at the half-melted badge on the body’s chest. “Sorry Eric,” Cal muttered. He was about to turn away when something grabbed at his arm. He swore loudly.   
“Sorry,” Connie whispered.   
“Jesus Christ Connie,” Cal said breathlessly. “I thought you’d got out.” Connie shook her head; there was a large gash across her right cheek and she clutching her stomach, wincing as she spoke.   
“Not quite,” Connie told him. “I slipped over when the kitchen went up.”   
“You and me both,” Cal said with a hollow laugh. “What the hell is going on here?” Connie winced again.  
“I don’t know, but I’m not staying to find out.” She started to move forwards but Cal stayed still. “Come on, are you coming or not?”   
“Is it safe?”   
“It’s about as safe as anywhere! Come on!” Hesitantly, Cal began to follow Connie. 

Joseph kicked at the door but it still would not budge. The room had filled with smoke and Jac was choking behind him, holding her chest. Her eyes streamed where she had rubbed them and she had begun to feel drowsy. Joseph launched himself at the door and for a moment he thought he felt the wood shift but when he went to try again, it had become firm. Jac erupted into a fit of painful coughs. Joseph ran to her.   
“Jac! Jac talk to me, are you okay?” Jac tried to speak but she could only wheeze. Her head started to droop to one side and Joseph saw that her eyes had closed. “Jac stay with me, you’re not doing this to me now! Not like this!” He shook her but Jac just groaned. Joseph could feel the strength leaving her; he had to get her to hospital immediately but they were still trapped in this room. It wasn’t just the smoke that bothered them. Joseph touched the wall with the back of his hand and he recoiled almost immediately. He looked down and saw that his hand was red and blistered. It was now or never. Joseph muscled up all of his strength and ran full pelt at the door with his shoulder. It shifted. “Again,” Joseph muttered to himself. He hit the door again. This time he saw it move. “One more!” Joseph’s shoulder collided with the door and it burst open, spilling him out into the corridor. He kicked the fallen debris aside as much as he could and then ducked back into the room to collect Jac. She was barely conscious and Joseph did the only thing he could think of. He threw the consultant over his shoulder and carried her out of the room like a fireman. The next question was: where did they go from here? 

Sacha blinked. His first instinct was to get the hell out of here but everywhere he looked, his path was blocked by flame or debris. The ground cracked and creaked under his weight.   
“Careful,” he told himself. “Gently does it.” He looked up at the wall of flames in front of him. It would be tricky but he thought he could get through them if he ran quickly. The fire leered back at him, crackling and spitting. Sacha closed his eyes and ran; the fire snatched at his jacket and Sacha threw it off. He looked back but the flames had already consumed it. Sacha breathed out, his heart racing. “That was too close.” But that didn’t matter, he was through and there had to be a way out somewhere along here.   
Sacha strode along the corridor, feeling his way through the smoke.  
“Help me.” Sacha froze. He looked around for the direction of the voice. Nothing. “Help.” Sacha glanced down at the floor and his eyes met with a frightened stare. It was Jonny. 

Jonny had run into the corridor when the kitchen exploded. Desperate to find Jac and get to safety, he had been knocked off his feet by a sudden rush of flames and had fallen unconscious. Sacha bent down to help him but Jonny was too weak to move. His head swam and there were burns all down his right side. Sacha glanced over at the flames edging their way down the corridor and closer to them. There was no time to wait; He grabbed Jonny and pulled him to his feet.   
The two men hobbled along the length of the corridor, Sacha supporting Jonny but it was slow going.   
“You should have just left me,” wheezed Jonny as Sacha forced his way through a half-collapsed door.   
“I wouldn’t be able to live with myself,” replied Sacha. “Where’s Hollie?”   
“Elliot took her outside before the fire started.” Jonny coughed and Sacha started to walk as fast as he could. There were street lights streaming at the far end and their hearts leapt as they realised they were close to safety.   
“Never thought I’d see the outside again,” Jonny spluttered as they burst their way through the fire exit and on to the street. The air was filled with the sound of fire engines, shouts and jets of water being sprayed in every direction. A paramedic ran up to them as Sacha laid Jonny down on the street as comfortably as he could.   
“Burns, smoke inhalation,” Sacha told the paramedic as the young Scot bent down to examine Jonny. Before he could stop him, Sacha was running straight back into the burning hotel.   
“Come back! It’s not safe!” The paramedic’s pleas fell on deaf ears. 

“So, what’re you gonna do when we get out of here?” Cal said, groaning slightly as he tried to kick a pile of debris out of the way. Connie bent down to help him but the pain her stomach intensified suddenly and she stood winded, holding her chest.   
“If we get out of here,” she reminded him. The fire and smoke raged like the mouth of hell behind them and with each passing moment it seemed to draw closer and closer. They could smell the smell of burning flesh and wood and they wondered how many had been unable to escape. How many lives had this inferno claimed already?   
“Don’t be pessimistic Connie, we’re gonna get out of here. Trust me,” said Cal but his voice was hollow and Connie could tell he was only trying to keep her calm. “I just wish I could shift this bloody headache,” Cal continued, squinting in the firelight. Connie stared at him curiously, examining his eyes as best she could.   
“Are you okay?”   
“Yeah I’m fine, I just hit my head in the explosion,” explained Cal. “You know how headaches can last,” but Connie gazed at him doubtfully. There was no time to argue, however and they continued to feel a path through the chaos. 

Mo and Ethan were the first to escape from the inferno and were only slightly injured. They looked all around for any sign of the others but they couldn’t see anyone. It was complete chaos and no one seemed to know who they were looking for or where to go. Firemen were darted around the circumference of the building; they were desperate to enter, however the situation had been deemed too precarious and all they could do was continue in their attempts to put the fire out. It wasn’t working; the fire grew faster than their hoses could extinguish it.   
“I can’t believe it,” Ethan muttered, gazing up at the building as it burnt. Mo said nothing. “I don’t understand,” Ethan continued. “I just…” He fell silent and put his arm around Mo. Just at that moment a trolley was wheeled past them and Mo caught the sight of Jonny’s face as he was lifted into the ambulance. She ran towards him, pushing past the paramedics.  
“I’m here Jonny, I’m here,” Mo told him. There was an oxygen mask over his face, so Jonny just grabbed at her hand and squeezed it, to let her know he’d be all right. “Of course you’re gonna be fine,” Mo kept saying, despite of the tears rolling down her face. “You’re always all right.” Jonny lifted the oxygen mask of his face and tried to speak.   
“Where’s Jac?” Mo looked over at Ethan. Jonny pulled at her. “Where’s Jac?” He wheezed again. Mo shook her head.  
“I don’t know,” she told him. “I haven’t seen her.” Jonny coughed violently and Mo tried to force the oxygen mask back on but he brushed it away, a determined look on his face.  
“Need…to…find…” His voice trailed away.   
“We can’t wait any longer,” the first paramedic said to Mo kindly. “He needs to get to hospital now.” Mo nodded.   
“Do you want to stay with him?” The second paramedic asked, looking at Mo. Mo nodded, taking a seat in the back of the ambulance. 

Jac opened her eyes. Joseph was still carrying her over his shoulder and she could see the intensity of the flames licking the walls all around them.   
“Joseph,” her voice was hoarse and her lungs ached from the smoke but she felt well enough to walk. Joseph stopped and gently lifted Jac to the floor. “That’s better,” Jac sighed.   
“You’ve been unconscious for about fifteen minutes,” Joseph told her. “I was trying to find a way out.” Jac gazed around at the corridor; the only way out was a wall of smoke and flame. In front of them, they could see the stairs that led to the upper floors of the hotel. That would be a last resort, thought Joseph as placed his hand on the marble bannister.   
“What are you waiting for Joseph?” Jac asked. “We need to go up now!” Joseph began to climb the stairs uncertainly.   
“If we go up, what’s to say we won’t get trapped on the roof?” Jac considered this. “There’s no easy way back down,” Joseph continued. Before they could come to a decision, there was a tremendous crack behind them and as they turned to look, they saw half of the corridor in ruins, smoke rising from the wreckage. The choice had been made for them; they would have to use the stairs. 

“Where am I?” Jasmine picked herself up from the floor and dusted her legs. There were burn marks and scratches all over her body; they ached and throbbed and her head was swimming. “What’s going on?” Nobody answered her. Jasmine’s heart was thumped erratically. Out of the corner of her, Jasmine thought she could see the distant silhouette of Connie but when she turned to look again, the shadow had gone. She was completely alone. Alone that is, apart from the wheezing breath of Simon as he inched his way towards her. Jasmine began to panic. Everywhere she gazed, she could see nothing but fire and smoke. There was no way out, she thought as she gave another desperate stare at where the lobby had been. Jasmine opened her mouth to scream but thought better of it. There was no point screaming, no one would hear over this racket and there was no reason they would come to her aid even if they had heard.   
The fire had spread throughout the hotel and it was slowly making its way towards the stairwell. There seemed to be no escape from its inhospitable glare. The insatiable hunger of the flames licked their way around the corridors, destroying everything in their path. Jasmine took a gamble and forced her way through a gap in the flames. She couldn’t hear the echo of the footsteps behind her, following her.   
“Staircase 3,” Jasmine said aloud, reading the sign on the door in front of her. She wrenched it open and began to dart up the stairs. Simon continued his pursuit, holding his breath so that she would not hear him cough. Jasmine stopped at the first floor, holding open the door to the landing. This was Wing C and as Jasmine stared across at the oval window on the other side, she wondered whether it would be possible to jump. Just below on the staircase, Simon lurked in the shadows, waiting for his chance to pounce. As Jasmine stepped forward there was another loud explosion from the ground floor and she suddenly tripped. She grabbed a door handle to stop herself from slamming into the floor. To her surprise the door swung open, evidently something had caused the security locks to short circuit. Jasmine staggered in to the room but before she could gather her bearings, a sweaty hand covered her mouth. She struggled but Simon’s grip was too strong for her.   
Simon forced her into the room, closing the door behind him. Jasmine recognised the foul stench of his breath and the fear began to rise within her. Simon threw her onto the bed; Jasmine quickly sat up and huddled against the back wall, edging as far away from her father as she could manage. Simon pulled up a chair beside the bed and sat down; his breathing was shallow and he kept squinting in pain.   
“It’s time we had a little chat,” Simon announced, and his lips curled into a salacious grin. 

“Jac, I need to explain,” Joseph said suddenly. They had just forced their way onto the third floor and for the first time they could no long smell the flames in their nostrils. Jac leant against the wall, coughing painfully.   
“There’s nothing to explain,” she said and folded her arms. Joseph looked at her pleadingly but this only served to worsen her mood. “Well what did you expect Joe? That I was going to be pleased to see you?” Joseph could feel his entire body shrinking under her pitiless gaze.   
“I’m sorry,” said Joseph.   
“Too late,” Jac replied, turning away from Joseph so that he would not see the tears forming in her eyes.  
“I want you to be happy,” Joseph began again.   
“I am happy, with Jonny,” retaliated Jac. “I have a family now, Joe. Don’t you understand what that means to me?” Joseph nodded; he knew perfectly what having a family meant to Jac and he wished she would see that he wasn’t trying to take it all away.   
“This isn’t about you and I,” Joseph told her. “It’s about moving on.” Jac could avert her gaze no longer. She rounded on him.  
“I have moved on Joseph!” Her chest was heaving. “It’s you who refuses to!” Joseph sighed.  
“I just wanted to tell you, I won’t stand in your way. I’m glad you’ve found someone to be with.” Jac couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Was it possible she had jumped to the wrong conclusion?   
“Joseph?” Jac asked uncertainly.   
“I just wanted to see you one last time,” Joseph told her. “Because you’re right, I couldn’t move on. I needed to see you with your whole life together. And now that I have, I…”   
“You?” Joseph gulped.   
“I see where your heart truly lies.” Joseph looked away from Jac, it was his turn to hide the tears. Jac touched him gently on his upper arm.   
“I’m sorry Joseph.” Joseph tried to smile.  
“It’s okay, it’s fine. I’m fine. You’re good together, I can see that.” The tender moment was suddenly interrupted with a bang as Sacha came careering down the corridor behind them. At first, Jac and Joseph were both too stunned to say anything but they quickly found their focus. Jac scowled at Sacha; she had still not forgiven him for going behind her back.   
“We need to get going,” Sacha told them, pretending he had not seen the look of disgust on Jac’s face. “The fire’s reached the third floor.” They didn’t need telling twice. All three of them sprinted along the corridor to the next set of stairs and climbed up to the fourth floor. 

“You and Ethan seem to fight a lot,” Connie said catching Cal completely off guard. “I’ve noticed the way you argue.” Cal wasn’t sure what to say to this. It was true, he did fight with Ethan on an almost daily basis but didn’t all brothers? In any case, he felt lightheaded and dizzy, and he didn’t want to talk about his brother at that moment. For all he knew, Ethan was lying dead beneath a pile of smouldering debris and that wasn’t an image he wanted to dwell on. Connie didn’t seem to want to drop the matter and there wasn’t much else they could do as they sat trapped between the fire and the lobby.   
“It’s just brotherly stuff,” said Cal. “I care about Ethan a lot but you’ve seen him.” Connie nodded. “We’re complete opposites, it’s natural that we clash.”   
“Do you think he’s got out?” Cal didn’t answer. He looked down at the floor and kicked at a broken piece of wood.   
“Tell me about your daughter,” Connie knew Cal was trying to steer the topic away from Ethan and normally she would have taken control, but they were both trapped with a limited chance of rescue and Cal’s request wasn’t so bad.   
“Grace, she’s everything to me,” Connie told him. “Every time I close my eyes, I can see her face and I know I have to get out of here for her sake.”   
“You must love her a great deal,” Cal murmured.   
“I do,” said Connie. Her eyes began to well up as the thought of never seeing her daughter again filled her heart. Cal put his arm around her, trying his best to be comforting but his headache deepened with each breath he took. It was pounding at the inside of his skull, gnawing and biting until he swore he could see stars in front of his eyes. More than once he felt physically sick. His eyes caught something.   
“You will see her again.”   
“You can’t promise that,” said Connie.   
“Yes I can,” replied Cal. Connie stared at him, raising her eyebrows. “I’ve found a way through.” Connie looked at where he was pointing and saw that Cal was right. There was indeed a gap between the flames. If they could just get through, it would leave them a clear path to the lobby. This was their only chance. 

“Is there any news?” Jonny looked up at Mo from the hospital trolley. She was holding his hand whilst the medical team stood, waiting in the background.   
“They’re still trying to get people out,” Mo explained.   
“Jac?” Mo shook her head. She knew this wasn’t what Jonny had wanted to hear but there was nothing she could do. Everyone was scared out of their minds; there was no knowing who might still be trapped in the depths of the hotel. “You will tell me, won’t you?” Jonny asked, wheezing with each breath.   
“Tell you what?”   
“You’ll tell me, no matter what happens.” Mo squeezed his hand as gently as she could.   
“I promise.” The consultant stepped forward.   
“Okay, we really need to take a look at him,” Mo let go of Jonny’s hand and stepped out of their way. She knew he was in safe hands. 

Cal and Connie were inches away from the lobby. They could see it looming ahead of them but Cal’s headache had worsened and as he took another step closer, he swayed unsteadily. Connie ducked out from under his arm just in time as he vomited black sick all over the floor and passed out. Cal’s body hit the ground with a crash. Connie tried to help him but she wasn’t strong enough to move him on her own.   
“Someone help!” Connie cried out but was met with silence. She tugged at Cal and felt his body shift slightly but it was no use. She’d never get him through those doors and into the lobby. Cal mumbled groggily. “What is it?”   
“Go,” Cal insisted. “Save yourself.” Connie hesitated. “Go!”   
“I’ll get help,” she whispered.  
“I’ll…be…fine,” replied Cal. “Now get going or I’ll knock you out and drag you out myself.” Connie cracked a small smile.  
“I’d like to see you try.”  
“I’m pretty good in a fight,” Cal said weakly. Connie took one last look and began to walk as fast as she could towards the lobby. Her stomach was killing her but she had to find help for Cal. 

“Dad,” Jasmine was terrified but she thought if she could appeal to the kind and loyal man within her father that, just maybe, he might stop all this and let her go.   
“You’re not my daughter,” Simon replied curtly. “I have no daughter.”   
“Then surely you should let me go?” Jasmine said, her voice hopeful. It was met with unpleasant laughter from Simon.   
“I’m not going to let you go,” he told her. “We’re going to burn together, right here in this room.” A horrible thought struck Jasmine as he said this. She thought about how quickly the fire had started. Something clicked in her mind.   
“It was you,” she said, aghast. Simon frowned. “You started the fire!”   
“Of course I did, did you think it just happened by chance?” Jasmine shook her head. She recoiled as Simon placed his hand on her cheek. “You have so much to learn about the world,” Simon began with a small laugh. “Such a shame you’ll never get to know it.” Jasmine ignored him; her eye had caught sight of something underneath the bed, a chamberpot of sorts. “Can you hear that Jas?” Simon asked with glee.   
“Hear what?” Jasmine moved herself to the edge of the bed, her arms almost within reach of the pot.   
“The sound of death.” Simon began to laugh maniacally. Jasmine saw her chance and grabbed the pot but Simon was too quick for her. He knocked Jasmine to the ground and the pot rolled out of her arms. “Oh no you don’t,” Simon cried out as he saw Jasmine scrabbling for the pot. She kicked out at him and Simon fell backwards. Jasmine dived for the pot, holding it by the handle and as Simon prepared to lurch at her again, she swung the pot as hard as she could. Simon dropped instantly. The expression on his face was something between surprise and fury but one thing was for certain: Simon Burrows would never hurt anyone again. The chamberpot lay in pieces around his head and Jasmine was shaking uncontrollably, tears rolling down her cheek. She opened the wind, her hands still trembling and climbed out onto the ledge. Jasmine stared down at the ground below; she had no idea whether she could survive the fall or not. It didn’t seem so bad. Better than running blind through fire and not knowing where you might end up. She gathered her courage and jumped. 

“Where’s Cal?” Ethan asked as Charlie stumbled out of the hotel; she was mostly uninjured save for a few cuts and bruises and a painful burn on her leg.   
“He’s still inside,” Charlie replied, coughing. “I think I saw Connie with him.” Ethan let out a huge sigh of relief, Cal would surely be safe with Connie looking after him. His elation, however was short lived as he saw Connie limping out on to the street, alone.   
“Cal,” was all Connie could muster before the pain overcame her and she collapsed on to the street. Ethan was jumping up and down, torn between wanting to help Connie and wanting to rescue his brother. He chose Cal.   
Ethan ran into the building and was immediately hit by a wall of smoke. He fought his way through but each step he took, his lungs filled further and further and he couldn’t stop himself coughing.   
“Cal! Cal, where are you!” He forced his way through the doors into where the reception had been and shouted out again. “Caleb!”   
“Ethan?”   
“Caleb?”   
“Ethan, I’m down here!” Ethan looked down and his eyes fell upon the helpless body of his brother. There was a pause and Ethan suddenly realised he was standing in vomit. But that didn’t matter. He had to get his brother out of here. “Are you on your own?” Cal asked. Ethan nodded. “I can’t walk, my head is killing me.” Ethan examined his pupils.  
“I think you’ve got concussion.” He pulled Cal’s arm around his shoulder and lifted him to his feet.   
“You’re stronger than you look,” Cal coughed, half smiling. He leant on Ethan.  
“I’m going to get you out of here,” Ethan told him. With Cal supported on his shoulder and limping on one leg, the brothers began to walk slowly towards the door.   
“I’ll owe you one after this,” Cal muttered.   
“Yeah, I expect you will,” Ethan replied. 

Sacha wheezed as he, Jac and Joseph made their way up to the roof. The smoke was filling their lungs but it was Sacha who had been worst affected. Neither Jac nor Joseph realised however and Sacha kept his pain to himself.   
“What’re you going to do when you get out of here?” Sacha asked Joseph. He tried to ask Jac but she was still refusing to speak to him.   
“I’m going to live my life,” Joseph told him.   
“You and me both,” replied Sacha, suppressing a cough. “First thing I’ll do when I’m out of here: I’m going to sort out all my debts and make a fresh start. It’s time for a change.” For the first time Jac momentarily forgot her anger.  
“You’re going to leave Holby?” Sacha sighed.   
“Yes,” he said after a long pause. “It’s time to move on.” There was no answer from Jac. She wanted Sacha to stay, but she didn’t want him to know that. 

When Jasmine awoke she found herself lying in a hospital bed, her legs in plaster and a bandage wrapped around her left arm. The first thing she realised was that she was alive. It took a few moments for all her memories to come flooding back to her. Simon’s face floated in and out of her mind, taunting her as only he could from beyond the grave.   
“What’s the matter?” Jasmine squinted; Charlie’s face floated into view and her heart leapt for a moment.   
“I need to talk to the police,” said Jasmine. Charlie looked up; there were two police officers waiting outside already. They had spoken to her earlier, about the fire, and Charlie assumed they were here to ask the same questions to Jasmine.   
“Are you sure?” Jasmine nodded.  
“Please. It’s important.” Charlie strode over to the door and beckoned them inside.   
“She says she wants to talk to you.” The police officers stood at the end of Jasmine’s bed and addressed her. Charlie hung in the background listening to Jasmine explain what had happened. She felt anger rising deep within her when Jasmine told how her father had been responsible for starting the fire.   
“Simon Burrows,” Jasmine clarified when the police asked her for his name. She knew the time had come for her to admit what she had done.   
“Where is your father now?” Jasmine looked at Charlie. Charlie didn’t need to ask, she knew what that expression meant and she stepped forward, grabbing Jasmine’s uninjured hand.   
“I’m here for you,” Charlie said, squeezing. Jasmine turned back to the police officers. She told them how Simon had taken her hostage in one of the hotel rooms and how he had plotted to kill her as well as himself. She paused when she reached the part where she’d escaped.   
“What happened then?” The first police officer asked, her voice kindly.   
“I hit him,” Jasmine admitted. “I had the pot in my hand and I just swung as hard as I could. I killed him.” The police exchanged solemn looks.  
“This is a very serious matter,” they said. Jasmine nodded. “You understand that you are now under arrest.” Charlie was appalled.  
“You can’t do that!” She yelled. “It was self-defence, any idiot can see that!” The police tried to calm her down but she was so tired and angry and it seemed like such an injustice after everything Jasmine had been through.   
“When the doctor’s discharge you, you’ll be escorted to the station and charged with manslaughter.” Jasmine nodded, accepting the terms. The police officers prepared to leave.   
“Have you heard anything from my sister?” Jasmine asked quietly.   
“There are still three people trapped in the hotel,” the second police officer told her. Jasmine’s heart sunk; she knew without asking that Jac was one of them. She closed her eyes, praying that Jac would be able to find her way to safety. 

“Jac,” said Sacha, his voice weak as they stepped through the door that led on to the roof. It was the first time anyone had spoken for almost an hour. They had climbed stair after stair with the fire raging behind them. There was no way down now and they could call for help from the roof. Joseph’s face was black with soot and he kept a careful watch on Jac. Sacha’s insides were burning but he didn’t want Jac to see he was in pain. His whole mind was set on making sure Jac got to safety first, then he could think about himself. Pain seared through his lungs.   
“I don’t want to hear it Sacha,” Jac told him.   
“I have to tell you,” Sacha’s voice grew fainter with each word spoken. “I have to tell you I’m…” Before Sacha could finish his sentence, he suddenly collapsed. Jac screamed as Sacha began to writhe on the roof. All anger at what had been done in the past was forgotten. Joseph ran to the edge and shouted down at the gathering firemen below.   
“Joseph, help me!” Jac shouted as she tried to listen for Sacha’s heartbeat. He was still shaking and he had already vomited down his shirt. “Sacha stay with me, you have to stay with me!” Sacha opened his mouth but only faint noises came out. His eyes began to close. Jac shook him. “You’re not doing this to me, not now. Not here Sacha!”  
“Jac?” Joseph didn’t want to give up but he knew it was hopeless. Sacha must have inhaled an inordinate amount of smoke. He tried to pull Jac away but she wrenched her arm out of his grip and stayed beside Sacha. “There’s nothing we can do,” Joseph told her.   
“We have to do something!” Jac snapped. “He’s not dying here! He’s meant to grow old and die in his sleep with a huge family gathered around him.”   
“I know it’s not fair,” said Joseph. Jac turned on him.  
“Of course it isn’t fair! None of this is fair!” There was a soft rasping noise from Sacha as he tried to speak. Jac bent down to listen.   
“I’m sorry,” Sacha coughed. “I didn’t mean to…”  
“I know you didn’t,” Jac whispered. “It was my fault, I shouldn’t have…” Sacha coughed again and Jac felt empty inside when she saw the pool of blood on his hands. They heard shouts from below; the firemen had almost reached the roof.   
“You’re so beautiful.” Jac tried to smile.   
“Just hold on Sacha,” She murmured. “Hold on just a little longer.” She held him in her arms. “Help’s coming. You’ll be all right, you’ll see.”   
Sacha was silent. Jac watched as two firemen climbed over the barrier and began to run towards them. She turned down to look at Sacha.   
“See what did I tell you?” She shook him gently but there was no response. “Sacha, wake up. Wake up!” His eyes were wide and staring but the light had already begun to fade from them. “Sacha, please…I need you.” Jac cradled him in her arms with tears flowing down her cheeks. She didn’t want to leave him, she didn’t want to have to accept that he was gone.   
“We need to go,” said a voice behind her but nothing mattered any more. Sacha was gone and all of a sudden there didn’t seem to be a point to anything any more. Jac didn’t fight as Joseph dragged her away from the body. She felt numb and she knew there was nothing she could do to bring Sacha back. 

One Week Later 

After the funeral, it seemed that life was at last returning to normal. Jac and Joseph said their goodbyes at the cemetery whilst Jonny held Hollie in his arms and waited patiently. His injuries from the fire were still quite painful but a lot of pain management had helped. The ceremony had been pleasant but there was no mistaking the sadness everyone felt when realised Sacha Levy would never again brighten the corridors of Holby City. Everyone agreed, his jokes had been the worst of the worst but they looked back on them fondly now.   
That morning Detective Inspector Yates contacted Charlie Fairhead and informed him that Simon Burrows’ body had been recovered from the wreckage of the hotel. It was a solemn feeling in the department at the news but in some ways they felt that justice had been served. Deep down, Charlie was dismayed that Simon would never be able to answer to his crimes.   
It wasn’t all doom and gloom. Connie collected Grace from the airport and after a long conversation with Sam, they had decided to give things another go for the sake of their daughter.   
“I don’t want to be halfway across the world from her,” Connie said. “But you need to be a part of her life.” Sam didn’t say anything. He didn’t need to, for the first time in his life, he truly had everything he wanted.   
Jac never saw Jasmine again after the funeral. They spoke for the last time after the service, before she was taken back into custody. It wasn’t that Jac didn’t want to see her sister again, in fact she had promised to help her get through it. Jasmine felt ashamed and she blamed herself for what had happened to Sacha.   
“It wasn’t your fault,” Jac tried to explain but there was no persuading her. Jasmine was determined to face the next stage of her life alone. Not completely alone. She still had Charlie.   
“Take care of yourself Jac,” Jasmine said before she was led away.   
“You too.”   
“I’ll be fine.” Jasmine looked away so that Jac would not see the terror in her eyes. The truth was, she had no idea what was going to happen to her. She was walking into the unknown. 

It took a while for Jac and Jonny to settle into married life. For ages it felt like something had ended between them but that wasn’t the truth. They had each other and they had Hollie. That was the most important thing and, after all, their lives were only just beginning. 

THE END


End file.
